EEeepp! I hope you all can forgive me; I've been and probably will be for a little while very sidetracked with the end of the school year.  Well, here is chapter number two.  Also, if you really want me to update faster, then you really need to review.  It would help, and it would make me smile!

Disclaimer.  Distressing, so distressing, but these characters are not mine!

Also IMPORTANT: These things basically indicate everything that goes on behind the camera.  Not that those watching can't hear or see it too (most shows have several cameras for different view points right?), but that's all just movie magic…. ( may also mean note at bottom, if its alone)

Commercial #1 on WarlockVision

            "Roar, roar, roar, roar.  Roar, roar, roar, roar.  Roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar."  The purple dragon sat at the counter, with the fellytone propped up against his ear (or the equivalent thereof) with his wing.

            "Guess tha' means ee's hungry!" Rubeus Hagrid stood outside his cabin, beaming at the camera.  The cameraman nodded vigorously, and Hagrid put the cell phone closer to his mouth.  A very loud chomping noise was heard on the other end, along with a loud "NOO!!!! No Norbert! Not the bunnies!!!" A very Weasley like voice shouted distantly on the other side of the fellytone. 

            Hagrid looked up as the other phone clicked off.  "And that's why dragons need Chickens 'n Rats!  All new from Cibus Horrendus magical animals food supply co.!"

Commercial Switches off

            Harry and the Weasleys at the Burrow all stare at the WarlockVision for a moment, and then look at each other.

            "I didn't know Hagrid wanted to be an actor." Ron said.

            "Find something new out everyday." Harry replied, as he settled back in his chair, munching on his popcorn.

            Back to programming

            "We're here with Lily Evans and Sirius Black as they surprise Severus Snape with a fashion makeover.   They've caught up with him in what he thought was a run-of-the-mill potion's class."

            "…That's right, you have been elected for a style-makeover with us by…"  Lily begins counting them on her fingers.  She'd given up getting Snape to stand and was standing next to his chair.  "…And Harry, Ron, Fred, George, Molly, Arthur, Tonks, Rosmerta, Fudge, Kingsley, Bill …" She continued.  Snape ignored her completely.

            Sirius was paying as little attention as Snape was to Lily, but was focusing entirely on the camera.  He'd smiled and winked at it, ignoring the director's angry face.  Finally the director stomped up to the front and drug the host away from the camera.

"Awww Jaammess, let me go, I'll be good…." Sirius could be heard wining in the background. 

            Completely oblivious to her surroundings, Lily had finally finished her counting.

            "And if you agree to come with us, you'll be spending a week in Hogsmeade with us, along with our makeup and hair styling specialists.  You'll also be receiving five thousand galleons" She pulled out a strange little card  "on your very own Wizard Platinum card." She showed it to him, or at least tried to (he ignored her), she was very proud of the fact that they'd found one that had a cauldron on it and said 'Potion's Masters are HOT.'  "All the money is yours to spend on a whole new wardrobe if you agree."

            Sirius bounded back onto the scene.  "We've been watching you for the past two weeks!  We've seen you in your black outfit which I see you have on now… Snape ignored him.  "And we've seen your gray nightshirt…and your black outfit, and the nightshirt, and the black outfit…" He started to look rather queasy.  Snape ignored him.  

            "Right, one of the things we need to do is show you how to….branch out a bit." Sirius beamed at the camera again. 

            "But there is a little catch." Lily said.  "If you choose to come with us you will have to surrender to us body, mind and wardrobe."

            "Yeah, all two items in your wardrobe." Sirius looked vaguely ill again.  Snape ignored him.  Neville stood up.

            "No! That's not true!  He really has three.  Remember the boggart…" Neville said.  Snape looked up.  Sirius walked over to Neville.

            "You an enemy of Snivellus?" He asked.  Neville gulped and nodded.  "Here's my card then." Sirius said. "It'll give you the spider address for the I Hate Snape Club."

            "That's the Web, Sirius.  It doesn't have a lot to do with spiders."  Remus muttered from behind the camera. 

            "STICK TO THE SCRIPT!" Came the director's voice.  Sirius jumped.

            "So, what do you say?" Lily asked Snape, who was still grading his papers, the only sign he was upset was his right hand pulling slightly at the end of his greasy hair.  Lily glanced at his hair in what she hoped was a covert manner.  She'd always wandered is he had spiders living in his hair, but she recoiled slightly after a short glance.  He had spiders.  In fact, he had an entire ecosystem living in the dark locks.  Probably had a nest of gundarks in there, if she cared to look close enough.

            "Are you still here?" Snape hissed at them, ignoring the camera with difficulty. 

The host was doing a slight jig from behind the camera.  He was jumping from leg to leg.  The director finally noticed and waved him off, the host tossed his microphone in the air as he ran to the loo.  Fortunately the cameraman had good reflexes.

            Snape sighed again.  "What are you doing here?" He asked.

            "We just finished telling you, don't you remember?" Sirius said.

            "Why aren't you all dead?" Snape asked.

            Sirius blinked for a moment.  "I'm…..I'm….James, he just said…did you hear what he just said…"

            "The script Si! The script!" The director muttered into his headset, which was connected to an earpiece in Sirius' and the rest of the cast and crew's ears.  James rather liked to think of his headset as a leash for reigning his crazy cast and crew in.  His 'wand of power', one might say.  "He doesn't know what he's talking about!" He told Sirius, as he waved a large and heavy looking book entitled, 'The Most Holy Mighty Script, Keep To It Or DIE.'

            "Why should I go with you?" Snape asked, while attempting to mind-over-matter Sirius out of existence with a angry stare.

            "Oh, yeah, that's real hard, how about. THE MONEY?" Sirius rolled his eyes.

            "I am payed perfectly well." Snape whispered, his voice becoming more threatening as time progressed.  Then a voice unheard till then rang out and stopped the showdown.

            "And yet, I think it would be…prudent…in relation to your job, if you did go." The voice said.  "And besides that, you have sixteen years of vacation to make up for." 

Albus Dumbledore stepped out of the shadows and smiled benignly at Snape. 

            "Oh, it is also very good to see you all again." Albus smiled at the cast and crew, then turned to Snape.  "You see, I am an old graduate of their style school myself." He stepped back so Snape could see the purple robes, which bore a very large picture of a lion on the front.  Sirius smiled proudly at him.  Just before…..

            Scene cuts off. 

Added on later to the shot, a large sign says "Moments later."  Unfortunately, this was not true, as it was really hours later, since Madame Pomfrey had to lift all of the various curses, jinxes etc. that Snape had bestowed quite generously upon everyone.  But of course, no one watching knew that.  Except for the spello-taped equipment and furniture, and the multi-colored skin of most everyone in the next shot.

            Harry sipped at his butterbeer, rubbed his nose, which was the same green as the rest of him, after Snape's temper tantrum (He'd been told the color would wear off soon).  He watched the WV (WarlockVision).  This was going to get interesting.

Okay…that got kind of loopy.  Tell me if you guys didn't understand it, cause I'm not sure I do myself…. Well, as always, if you want an update then you must review.  Really.  I get insecure about these stories, so I need to know if someone cares if I continue.

REVIEWS!!!!

            (Announcer) "We bring you are news caster Remus Lupin, who is here to give us a report of today's news.  Remus?"

            Camera pans to a desk, which looked almost empty, except for a bit of hair sticking out from behind it.

            "Ahem!  AHEM!"  Announcer says. 

            "Oh, okay." Newscaster stands up.  Everyone gasps GASP.  He is bright pink.  Even his hair was.  Pink doesn't compliment a pinstriped gray suit.  At least this pink didn't.

            "Right." Remus said.  "Besides the evil author who is insisting on torturing and mutilating all us poor characters." (glares)

            "The said author has received a whole four reviews!   Though what makes her worthy, I sure don't know…" (author glares)

            "We hope that Chaotic Demon meant well.  We think she did?" He asks.  "In other news, Miss Piratess seems to be a fan of mine.  I certainly hope the pink is not here to stay…and we always love to hear from Hobbitinguard, she's one of our favorite reviewers!"

            "Back to the subject, unless you want to stay pink."

            "NO! Ok. I'll behave.  And Bored and Delirious is thanked, and is also absolutely correct.  This is absurd.  Who let's this author write?"  Cowers back slightly at angry glare, then runs off the stage, screaming 'Not the pink! Not the pink!'

Sung to 'Meow meow meow meow…"

            Fellytone, well, that's just me being silly.  Sorry, but I think the word is cute.