A/N First, thank you for all the wonderful reviews. To address Ali's nitpick: At my high school (and I double checked with my sister who still teaches there), the valedictorian was/is chosen by the students. Graduation occurs so close after exams that there is no time for the teachers to correct exams, get the marks in, and then inform the top student in enough time to prepare a speech. We didn't have a salutatorian, so I figured I could do with that what I wished.
And I still own not one piece of The OC.
Supper that night was uncomfortable all around. Once Sandy had talked to Kirsten and they had determined that the letter situation was under control, he could go back to being upset with Ryan for lying to them. Especially over something so small and yet important at the same time.
Kirsten was unsure of where she stood with Ryan now. She and Ryan had never talked that much about his past before. She felt like they should be closer now, but it seemed best to keep her distance.
Seth was trying to figure out everything that was going on. He knew his mom and Ryan had talked about the letter, but neither one of them had explained it to him. His dad seemed mad at Ryan, apparently about whatever it was that Dr Kim had said, but again, no one felt the need to let him know about it. Life was easier as an only child – then he knew all the secrets.
Ryan pushed his food around for most of the meal. When everyone was finished, he got up and said, "I'm going out tonight. I'll see you guys later."
"Where are you going?" Kirsten asked.
"Uh, some of the guys from the soccer team are going to the movies. I thought I'd go with them."
"Can we talk before you go out, Ryan?" Sandy wanted to know. And it wasn't actually a question.
Ryan really didn't want to have this conversation with Sandy. He knew Sandy was mad at him for lying, and he didn't want to find out what he thought about Ryan turning Dr Kim down. "Can we do it tomorrow? The guys are waiting."
"I'd like to do it right now."
"I wouldn't."
"Ryan, you can't just avoid things that aren't easy."
Seth saw the way his dad was matching Ryan glare for glare. He wondered if his dad was still talking about the conversation he wanted to have.
"I just don't want to do it. I'm late."
Sandy looked pointedly at Ryan. "You don't always get to decide based on what you want. Sometimes, you do things for other people, because they want you to."
Yeah, Seth was pretty sure his dad wasn't talking about Ryan staying home. He wished he knew what was going on. He looked at Ryan to see if he figured out what Sandy was talking about.
"I'm not doing this right now." Ryan turned to leave.
"I didn't say you could go."
Ryan stopped and turned slowly. "I'm grounded because of this? Nice."
Sandy really hadn't planned on grounding Ryan, but things were escalating. "You lied to us!"
Kirsten jumped in. "OK guys, to your corners." She looked at Ryan. "Ryan, you're not grounded, but know we're not happy about the lying." Then she looked at Sandy. "Sandy, there's no reason this conversation can't wait until tomorrow." She looked back at Ryan. "But it will happen tomorrow, before Monday. Understood?"
Ryan nodded at Kirsten. "OK. And...sorry." He turned to Sandy. "So I can go now?"
"Fine. But home by midnight. And you're not leaving the house tomorrow until we talk."
Sandy sat at the table in their room, looking across at the dark pool house. He glanced at his watch. 11:58. He turned to Kirsten, who was reading in bed. "He's got 2 minutes to get home."
"Sandy, he's a good kid. He'll be home."
"You don't think he'll stay out just to spite me?"
Kirsten saw the lights come on in the pool house behind Sandy. She smiled. "No. But I think he'll stay out till the last minute to worry you."
Sandy turned back toward the pool house to see the lights on. He sighed, then crawled into bed with Kirsten and put his arms around her. "This speech should be a good thing, a happy thing. Why are we fighting about it?"
Kirsten smiled. "Because you're both hot-headed and think you know what's best. If it makes you feel any better, it took me two tries to have an actual discussion with him."
Sandy kissed her hair. "OK. Tomorrow he'll tell me why he doesn't want to do it, I'll calmly explain why his reasons are wrong, and he'll agree to do it."
"Or, you'll talk to him with an open mind, actually listen to why he doesn't want to do it, and accept it if his reasoning is sound."
"Eh, your way might work too."
When Ryan didn't come in for breakfast the next morning, Sandy realized he had to go out to him. He brought a cup of coffee with him as a peace offering. Ryan was on his bed with his books open.
"You didn't come in for breakfast this morning."
"Rosa keeps the mini-fridge stocked." Ryan gestured to his books. "Finals are next week and I've got a lot of work."
Sandy handed him the coffee and then sat in the desk chair. "So, why'd you lie to us?"
Ryan sighed. "Because I didn't want to have this conversation. Isn't it enough that I don't want to?"
"No, it's not. There's got to be a reason. Your teachers and Dr Kim have given you this opportunity..."
"They haven't given me anything! Dr Kim doesn't even like me. I'm just a 'success story' to her. If I do this, then Dr Kim can use it to prove how good the school is. 'We had a student who came to us with nothing but potential – poor grades, truancy, legal troubles – and after two years at Harbor he was a top student. He even gave the salutatory speech.' I don't want to give that to her."
"Ryan, people see you as more than just a success story. More than just..." Sandy struggled with the words.
"'That boy from Chino'? Because even after two years in Newport, I'm still 'that boy from Chino' to a lot of people."
"Not to us."
"I know that. But why would I want to get up and talk in front a bunch of people who think I should be parking their cars?"
"Because we know you belong on that stage and we're proud of you."
"But what does me giving the speech prove? Me giving the speech won't change anyone's opinion of me – yours or theirs. You're proud of me even if I don't give the speech, aren't you?"
"Of course, we are."
"Then I just don't see the point."
"No, I guess you don't." Sandy didn't know what else he could say to convince him. "But will you promise me you'll consider it anyway?"
Ryan didn't answer him. "I need to study."
Sandy stood up. "OK. But come in for lunch. You can't stay out here studying all day."
After Sandy left, Ryan did think about it. No matter how he looked at it, it made no sense for him to give the speech. He didn't care about giving the speech. Sandy said they were proud of how well he did even if he didn't give the speech. There were still people in Newport who felt he didn't belong at the Harbor School, or in Newport itself for that matter, and giving the speech wouldn't change their minds. He laughed to himself. It would piss them off if he gave the speech. But no, he wasn't going to do it out of spite. Sandy seemed to think he was missing something, but he just couldn't see the up side of giving the speech.
The next morning at school, Ryan and Seth were walking down the hallway to class. Seth turned to go up the stairs, but Ryan didn't go with him. "Hey man, aren't you coming to Economics?"
Ryan looked uncomfortable. "No. I gotta go..." He pointed in the general direction he was headed, "...talk to Dr Kim."
"Are you ever going to tell me what's going on?"
"No. Because once I talk to Dr Kim, the whole thing is irrelevant." Seth looked hurt by this. "Look, it's just not important, Seth."
"It was important enough for you and my dad to argue about."
"No, it was important to him. Not to me."
"Would I think it was important?"
This question threw Ryan. He figured Seth would think it was important. But if he said yes, Seth would be even more hurt that Ryan hadn't told him. And he wasn't going to argue with another Cohen about this. "No, Seth, you wouldn't think it was important. Now go to class. I'll be there soon."
Ryan watched Seth take the stairs two at a time and then turned towards Dr Kim's office. Well, he thought to himself, I'd better get this over with.
TBC