Hey guys, yes, we're back. We both hope you'll like this chapter, please don't forget to review, it'll surely help to write faster!!!
Thanks a lot.
Chapter 9
"Our daughter."
*-*-*-*-*
Still wearing her Pj's and fluffy Silvester slippers, she popped in the kitchen by the smell of coffee and found her brother dressed for work pouring some coffee.
"Good Morning!" Alex cheerfully greeted as she warmly hugged her brother in a failed attempt to cheer him up as well.
"Morning." He coldly mumbled, like don't wanting to really talk. Alex poured some orange juice for her as she saw him quietly sitting on one of the kitchen's stool and silently staring at his cup of coffee. Just coffee, Alex noticed. Bitter, dark and black coffee, nothing else for breakfast; it wasn't like him, he used to drink his coffee with double cream and double sugar, and a little touch of cinnamon. He also used to take a pretty big and complete breakfast. 'The most important meal of the day.' She remembered him saying; besides he liked to fix it. He was a hell of a good cook for a demon. Maybe his alimentary habits these last days were a reflection of how he felt.
It had been like this for the last few days, he was like not talking, he wasn't angry anymore, but he wasn't happy either. He didn't smile, he didn't yell, he didn't bitch, he didn't rage… he just was like and empty and spare body, with no life, although the normal vital signs. She was so worry, because she didn't know what to do, he didn't talk to her, he didn't sleep, he didn't eat at all; he just went to work and came back late at night and go to bed. And he just answered like 'Yeah, whatever.' To everything she said to him. It was like nothing mattered to him.
She starred at him for a couple of minutes, and made another attempt; damn she had to try. "Cole…" she called for him as she came closer. He just raised his head with an 'what?' wondering expression.
"Wouldn't you like to have breakfast in a nice place?" she tried eyeing.
"No, I'm not hungry." He just replied avoiding look at her.
"Come on, it'll be fun… just like we used to do when I moved in." she continued without any result of enthusiasm from him. "You can choose, we could go for pancakes, we could have a muffin…or no, I know, croissants, your favorites." She tried. "Yes! We could shimmer to France and-" she excitedly tried.
"No." he said. "Some other time." He said and remanded quite.
"Ok, but we haven't hung out for days, why don't we have lunch together, hey we could go to this new Sushi place..." she proposed.
He just shook his head looking down. She needed to get his attention for something to get him out of this 'trance mood' state.
"Look, I cast a spell to make my nails grow longer, you can yell at me for that." She said showing her long French nails done. No response from him. She sighed.
"I'm going clubbing tonight…" she said.
"Ok." He said.
In other situation Alex would have disappeared and go partying for the next three days, but this wasn't right. "Look, you gotta snap out of this mood, Cole." She continued. "You're not like this… you yell at me for being home late, you laugh at my lack of fighting skills, you bitch about every case you get at work, you boss around, you make dark comments…" she told him. "You lecture me, you joke around, you enjoy a fine wine while listening to jazz… and now I just don't know who you are… you're just like a body with not life." She sincerely said.
"I don't feel like living." He said. Empty but deep reply.
She just sat in front of him facing him. "Look, why don't you talk to her?" she suggested. "You tell her you suspected it and she might just confirm and well, maybe you guys-"
"It's not meant to be." He simply said. "And it's all my fault. She's happy now and-"
"No!" she cut off. "You can't be the guilty party the whole time, because let's face it, she played the biggest bitch when she hid your daughter from you, but you can not, NOT do anything now that you know the truth either."
"You don't seem to understand!" he coldly barked as he left the kitchen in a total attempt to avoid the subject.
*-*-*-*-*-*
At the manor, Phoebe was in her room, lying on her bed with Prue in her arms. Jonathan had gone to some… some, she didn't even know where in the hell he was, all she cared was that the bastard was out of town and he wasn't around bothering her. It was early in the morning and the little one started crying, that's why Phoebe decided to pick her in bed with her, she didn't want to get up yet and wanted to spend a little time alone with her daughter. She was tickling the little girl's tummy, who was laughing out loud. It made Phoebe smile, even though she didn't really want to smile. But still she had to be strong for her baby, and she had to keep her promises to her daughter.
**** FLASHBACK****
Night- April 27th, 2003.
"Here's your baby all cleaned up, and ready for you to start breastfeeding." The nurse happily announced as she gave the new-born baby to her mother.
"Yay!" Phoebe exclaimed childish as she welcomed her arms to embrace her baby. "Thank you." She said.
"Your family had to leave after you gave birth, but they said they would be back soon. Something about an emergency." The woman informed.
"Thanks again, for everything." Phoebe said smiling.
"Ok, so here it…" The nurse said as she put a pink paper bracelet around Phoebe's wrist. "The baby's I.D. for now… Prudence Halliwell. I'll leave you alone, please call if you need anything." She said and Phoebe just nodded gratefully as she left and close the door behind her.
Once the nurse was gone, she turned her gaze to what she had between her arms. She still couldn't believe it. She had a baby, and she was a mom. She just was having the best and happiest moment in her life. It had been just a few hours since Prue had come to the world and Phoebe still couldn't believe it.
While the baby was nursing from her mother's breast, Phoebe couldn't help but smile. It felt weird, because it was the first time she was doing this, but it was great, amazingly and wonderfully weird. She saw her so tiny, so innocent, she still couldn't believe it… She was SOOOO happy, and proud and excited and… more scared than never in her life… now she was responsible for this little person, she had to do everything in the world to keep her alive and happy… then she glanced around and understood the situation of her reality… just like she was in that moment in that empty hospital room, it would be from now on… just her and her daughter. It just would be the two of them. It wasn't like her sisters and Leo would also be there, but it wasn't the same… just like in that moment, when they had to leave to vanquish the demon of the week…
Phoebe's thoughts were interrupted when Prue started crying, so Phoebe put her knees together and grabbed the baby in a way that she had her in front of her, lying on her legs…
"Shh.. baby…" she said and looked at her. She still was grabbing very softly and very careful because she was afraid she might break her, she was sooo tiny… the feeling she had in that moment was nothing alike to any thing she had felt in her life. Because of her duty as a Charmed One, she always had that feeling to protect the innocents, but this, this was a totally different and new thing for her, she just knew for instinct that she had to protect her and watch after her…
"Hey Prue… yes, that's you." she started looking at her. "Hi, I'm your mommy and I want you to know that you have made me the happiest woman in this world just for being here." She said, by now she had tears in her eyes, she couldn't help it, she was soo happy, but still was like scared that she might screw it and do something wrong… she was new on this. She kept staring at the baby in silence for a moment, when the baby started yawning.
"Baby, I see you're sleepy, sweet dreams, mommy will be here watching your sleep." She said and then in that moment, something happened, for the very first time Prue let her eyes wide open and stared at her mother, when this happened Phoebe was impressed to see those deep blue eyes staring at her once again… those same deep blue eyes that she feel in love with, those same blue eyes that loved her and comforted her…the same deep blue as Cole.
In that moment, when her daughter looked at her with that look, with those eyes, Phoebe realized that from now on, she and Cole would be united for the rest of their lives.
Now, She felt so alone and so vulnerable. She deadly wanted Cole to be there with them, just like any father protecting his family, but she had to face her reality. It wasn't like that, she was alone now, with her baby girl.
"It doesn't matter, sweetheart." She talked to her. "We don't need anybody. We'll be just fine. I swear to you that I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe and warm… no one will come before you. Ever. And if in any moment I can't be there for you, it won't be on purpose, it'll be because I'm doing something for you." She said while smoothly running her finger in her little head as she saw the baby peacefully sleeping. "I love you soo much and I'll always be there with and for you. And we won't need anyone else to be happy, because I'll take care of that… because if it's not like that I'll go and kick the destiny's butt myself." She said childish and her face wet with tears. "Your mommy can kick some serious butts, you know…" she said chuckling.
She sighed, "Anyway… never forget that I love you so much." She said kissing the sleeping baby's forehead.
"God bless you my darling." She gave Prue her blessings while realizing that now, she had to be responsible, strong, tolerant and assume any other attitude that might be needed in the future to protect her most important and beautiful innocent… her daughter.
***** END OF FLASHBACK *****
The guilt was overwhelming her, she deadly wanted to tell Cole about Prue, but she didn't know how, she was so afraid of his reaction. Looking at her daughter always made her think about Cole, they had the same smile, the same eyes...
Phoebe couldn't help but smile; Prue was so cute. The best for her would be to have a Daddy, an actual real Daddy; one who loved her, who really cared about her, not who only wanted to screw her mother like Jonathan.
"Yuck!" she mumbled, just the thought made her want to puke. Maybe was one of those post-natal aside effects; no sexual desire, and that plus the whole emotional charge and by now she was totally clear. She despised Jonathan, but she also loved Cole with all her heart. She wanted to dump Jonathan, but it was hard, she still felt commitment to him, he had been with her in a hard time, but still it wasn't working and she didn't know how long she would be able to bear with that bastard.
'It's for Evil to kill innocent people.' She kept repeating herself mentally.
Cole would be a perfect father; he was a perfect father, no doubts about that. Phoebe wanted him to be part of her family, to live happily with the both of them, but she knew it wouldn't work out, she had too many doubts, too many fears, too many everything... She wanted Cole to be Prue's father but she wasn't ready to have him as a lover. Everything was so complicated.
"I have to tell him, right baby?" She asked to her daughter.
In answer Prue gave her a big smile and Phoebe smiled as well.
She kissed her daughter on the cheek and said: "Mommy loves you baby, a lot."
"I'll go see your Daddy today and I'll tell him about you." She added.
She finally got up, took Prue in her arms and went to the kitchen to have breakfast.
After breakfast, she asked Paige to take care of Prue while because she had some things to take care of, of course, Paige agreed, she loved to watch Prue. Phoebe gave her daughter a bath, changed her and gave her to her Auntie Paige while she was having a shower and getting dressed. She was feeling nervous about telling Cole but she had to, she was decided to do it, at least for her daughter and also to have an easy conscience about it. Once she was ready, she went in Paige's room to kiss her daughter goodbye and she headed out of the manor towards the penthouse.
When she arrived there, she hesitated a lot before knocking at the door. Her hands were all sweaty; she was shaking nervously and trying to find the best way to tell him without hurting him or making him crazy. The only way she found was to tell him straight.
She finally knocked at the door and took a huge breath.
Cole opened the door and sternly asked: "What do you want?"
It almost hurt her the coldness in his voice. Still she didn't change her mind. She was decided to do it. She tried to cool off a little the mood. "How are you? How's Alex?" she asked.
Cole just sighed and buttoned his suit. "She's at college. Look, I have to go to work, and I doubt you came in a social visit, so please…" he said.
"I need to tell you something." She said.
"Go ahead." He replied without even looking at her as he was getting some documents inside his briefcase.
"Maybe you should sit down." She insisted.
At this Cole turned to look at her. "Whatever you want to say, just say it." He coldly said with a 'whatever' attitude.
Phoebe hesitated a little more and just said it. "Cole... Prue...uh… Prue… Prue is your daughter." She just let the words come out of her mouth waiting for a reaction.
Cole didn't react at all. And Phoebe was freaked because of it, so she decided to keep talking. "It happened when-"
"I know that already, Phoebe." He just cut off nodding and starring at her.
"Wh…wh-what? Excuse me?" she was the one who reacted now.
"But it doesn't change anything, right?" He coldly threw in.
"How did you-?" Phoebe still couldn't come out of her shock.
"It doesn't matter." He shook his head. "She's my daughter and you hid it from me, but I don't blame you."
Cole shrugged and said: "In fact, it's better like this, it's already hard to love one person when she's far away, I don't think I can handle two. You hid her from me since the beginning and we both were fine. I know why you came here. I know you, Phoebe and I know you feel guilty coz you let me saw her and in some way we bonded and well… now you think… uh… it doesn't work like this."
"I just..." She started.
"Save it Phoebe, just go and take care of your daughter, you have a family to take care of, I mean you even got her a father… and well, you are doing just fine and I have Alex so I'll be fine, we'll all be fine, end of the story." Cole told her.
Phoebe looked down and said: "I'm sorry… I just… I just wanted you to know about her, I wanted you to know you had a daughter. It was a mistake to hide her from you, I realize that, I had no right to do what I did… you had the right to know. I'm not asking you for a name, for money or for anything... I just wanted to let you know."
"That's really nice Phoebe." He said sarcastically.
She was about to talk but he cut her off and said: "I love you Phoebe, every damn second of my life I think about… I think about what happened between us over, and over and over again to see what I could change if I could have the luck to make it better. But I can't change what I've done or who I am. I know that even if we have this baby, we won't be together because it's not mean to be."
"I…" she started.
"No, let me finish." He stated. "Let me tell you a story, it's almost Christmas and there is that little boy looking at this wonderful toy he wants so much for Christmas. Everyday he passes by the shop and looks at his favorite toy, which look like gold to him. But the problem is that he hadn't been a good boy and he knows it, he knows he'll never have the luck to have that special toy he loves so much but still he keeps looking at it everyday without touching it, because he's been a bad boy and he's afraid he might break it." He continued.
"I'm that kid and us being happy as a family with our daughter is that toy." He finished.
Phoebe was at the verge of tears, she didn't know what to answer, she didn't know what to say. She wanted to hug him tightly and comfort him, she wanted to tell him that they could go back together and be happy, but she couldn't. She finally let the tears roll down her checks and that brought tears to Cole's eyes.
"Now go back home and take care of that little one." He said, he couldn't break in front of her; she had to leave before he started to cry.
He wiped away her tears and kissed her on the forehead.
"It's not your fault and I want you to know that I'll always be there for the both of you guys, I'll be watching you, even if I'm not a whitelighter, I'll be there." He added.
"Thank you." Phoebe whispered, unable to stop the tears that were rolling down her checks. Cole had barely heard her but this was sounding as a goodbye. He didn't want her to leave but he just couldn't stand the fact to be a part of her family, it was beyond his power, he just had to let her go and go on with her life with her baby girl, that's how it was meant to be, he knew he didn't deserve to have a happy life with the people he loved the much on earth.
He kissed her on the forehead one more time and she turned back and left.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Some hours later, it was lunch time and Alex had decided to stop by home to grab a sandwich, then she would catch one class in the afternoon and then she probably would go with Paige, they'd become close friends with the time… when she opened the door, it was strange to see her brother at lunch time in the penthouse.
"Hey." She said.
"Hi." He quietly replied.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I'm working from home." He replied coldly
"But you don't seem to be working." She said referring to his position, sitting on the floor, in a corner.
"Get out of here." He mumbled.
She sighed and came closer. "What happened?" she questioned.
"Phoebe was here…" he replied like he didn't care.
"And…?"
"She came to tell me everything. But.." He said and stayed quite.
"But…?" she stayed hanging.
"I'm not seeing her or the baby ever again." He replied.
"Why?"
"Because." He said not looking at her.
Alex tried to understand. "Don't tell me that she denied you the baby…" she started, Cole didn't say anything. "Oh shit… that's not fair, she can't just tell you and deny you to see your daughter." She said. "Look, you're Prue's biological father and we can prove it, so we can suit her and take Phoebe to court, so you'll get some custody. It's only fair." She said pretty excited about the legal procedure. "And if it doesn't work, we find the judge and I sleep with him, so you'll win and-"
"Phoebe didn't deny me anything." He clarified. "She just said she wanted to let me know." He added.
"And what are you gonna do?" she asked.
"Nothing."
"Nothing?!" she reacted. She couldn't believe it.
"What could I do anyway?" Cole questioned.
"You could get to spend some time with her. She deserves to have you as a dad." She suggested.
"You don't understand." Her brother said shaking his head.
"Ok, maybe I don't, but I'll just tell you one thing. You know why I didn't meet my dad?" she asked. "Because my mom killed him when I was three, and I'll never forgive her that… and in some point I hate my dad, because I'll never forgive him he let her go that far. In some level I feel like he didn't fight…" She said wiping a tear. "Would you like your daughter to feel the same way towards you?" she questioned. The issue really had touched her. "At least Phoebe's doing the first step, and I think it's only fair for that little one to have the grace to know his father." Cole just stayed there quite.
"You have no idea what I would have given to spend some time with mine..." she said wiping a tear.
*-*-*-*-*-*
The next day, Phoebe was in her office, it was pretty late and she had to take Prue with her because Paige and Piper were busy so, she put Prue on her car seat and put this one on her desk. She was trying to work on her column on the computer while trying to watch Prue at the same time. It was hard, because Prue was like wanting to cry for everything.
"Come on baby, be quiet please." Phoebe said.
"Mommy has to do some work and then we'll go home, eat, have a bath and go to bed." She added.
Prue just babbled in response. Phoebe went again to her column, but Prue started crying. So she went to her purse and gave her daughter her car keys and she started playing with them. It made Phoebe remember the time when she, Piper and Prue had to watch a baby, Prue had been using her powers to make all the things that was in her purse levitate to calm the baby.
'Damn where's an active telekinetic power when you need it?' she thought.
She was trying to keep Prue quite so people wouldn't notice that the little girl was there but suddenly, Elise got in her office, without knocking of course.
"Do we have a new Halliwell working for the advice column?" Elise asked, referring to Prue.
Phoebe smiled; she was surprised that her boss hadn't yelled at her in the first place.
"I'm sorry Elise, I know Prue is not supposed to be here but I couldn't find a babysitter, my sisters are all busy and..." Phoebe apologized.
"I understand." Elise sighed. "That's actually what I want to talk you about."
"Excuse me?" Phoebe was not following.
"The editor has been checking your recently work, and-" Elise commented.
"Is there something wrong?" Phoebe asked concerned.
Her boss opened her mouth trying to find the words. "Not exactly. It's just that since a while ago, your column is not what it used to be, it has changed." Elise explained.
"I have changed, I am a mother now." Phoebe said.
"I get that." Elise agreed. "It's just that it lost that spark, that… your work used to be like you icky, sexy and it always had that special touch… but now it's just regular stuff." Her boss explained.
"Well, I still give advise, it's just that it's expressed in a different way, from another perspective perhaps?" Phoebe defeated.
"It's not just that… it's… uh… you haven't showed up to a radio interview in months, and look at yourself… your image." Elise commented.
"What about it?"
"Look, I'm not saying you have to be all dressed like a model, but some make up wouldn't hurt… and I bet you haven't got your hair done in weeks, and you have baby stains on your clothes…" she said indicating to a stain on Phoebe's blouse. Prue had thrown up a little that day when they were on the elevator of the paper.
Phoebe sighed and looked down at Prue.
"Look, I understand what this is all like, I'm a mother myself and I went through this situation as well… but my point is that you have to be able to deal with the fact of being a mother and to keep it up with your work, because it's obviously been affected." She added.
Phoebe sighed once again. "I'll try to do my best." She said. Elise was right, but how to make enough time to take care of Prue, fight the demons, keep her image and keep it up doing an amazing job. It was impossible.
Then Elise took Prue in her arms. "Now, I'll take this beautiful with me while you finish your work." She acted like Phoebe was a kid and Prue was the toy distracting her from doing her homework; somehow, it was like that.
Phoebe was a little off by this, but then she couldn't help but smile. "Thanks Elise."
Elise smiled in return and said: "Deadline's tonight." She took Prue in her arms and walked out of the office.
In the mean time, Cole arrived at the paper, it was the last place he wanted to be, but he had to; he didn't have other choice, it was work. It was about a reporter who had got a lawsuit because of the means he had used to cover a big story. Cole hated this kind of cases, because it was hard to work with journalists since the most of the time there was an unknown source involved, which the journalist always insist on protect above everything. Cole had tried to pass this case to another partner from the firm, but they insisted him to take the case, because they would need someone like him to manage and win the case in court. He got in paper's office and saw a commotion.
Elise was surrounded by people, mostly women, looking at Prue, amazed of the beauty of Phoebe's daughter. They were all ticking her and talking to her, and she was just laughing and giggling. She practically had half of the staff 'enchanted.' She was sooo cute.
"Excuse me." Cole said, clearing his throat when he arrived towards the group.
"Oh, but here we got Prue's Daddy." Elise assumed. She remembered him, she knew he was Phoebe's ex-husband and Prue's blue eyes could only come from him.
"Elise they're calling you from publicity." Someone called for her.
"Excuse me." She said as she handed him the baby. Cole was feeling really weird, also shocked; it was when someone had called him Daddy, it was the first time he was really realizing that he was a father.
Prue started crying, Cole recognized this cry, his daughter needed to get changed.
"She needs to get changed." Cole said.
He kissed the baby on the forehead and started to rock her and she immediately calmed down.
"You can use my office, I won't need it for the moment." Elise offered pointing to her office while grabbing the phone.
Cole nodded and walked towards her office but he realized that Prue's diapers and everything she needed to get changed was probably with Phoebe. He stopped by his ex-wife office and knocked.
"Hi, Prue needs to get changed. Do you have things that might help here?" Cole asked.
Phoebe was taken aback; she was wondering what Cole was doing there, at the paper. She was so surprised that she forgot to ask him the reason of his presence there and gave her Prue's bag.
"Thanks." Cole told her and with that he walked out of the office to go in Elise's.
Once Prue was changed, Cole sat down on a chair with his daughter in his arms. He wanted to spend so time with her, alone. Prue was feeling good in her father's arms, gone were the cries and now she was brightly smiling. Cole took her little hand in his and starred at her, thinking how impossible it was for him to live with his baby girl. He had to stay out of her life because he wanted her to be safe. In a way, he knew Phoebe had made the right choice when she decided to hide her from him, it would have been too dangerous. Being a Charmed Ones' baby is already hard because every demon wanted to get you coz you're powerful, let's not talk about what it could have been if the whole underworld knew that Prue was also Cole's daughter. That's why he had to stay away from her and Phoebe. He only caused troubles in the past and already had lost a baby boy because of his evilness and he had hurt Phoebe more than any human being could handle. He loved the both of them so much that he had to let them go, and that's what he was going to do.
He took a huge breath and kissed Prue on the forehead.
"I just want you to know that I love you baby and I love your Mommy too. I'll always be watching you and Auntie Alex will let me know every single thing about you. I won't be there for your first word or your first step but, I'll keep an eye on you and your Mom." He said before kissing her one more time.
"I love you." He whispered, trying to fight his tears back.
A knock on the door interrupted him and a beautiful blond woman, who was also Elise's secretary, entered the office. She put some papers on Elise's desk and she smiled at Cole and he smiled back.
"Your daughter is so cute, just like her Daddy." The girl said in a seductive way.
"Thank you." Cole replied. He still couldn't get used of being called Daddy.
"So, you're Phoebe's ex-husband." She asked.
"Yeah. Cole Turner." He said.
"Amanda Caldwell." She said, as they shook hands.
"And what do you do for a living, Mr. Turner?" She asked already hitting on him.
"I'm an attorney." He replied.
"An attorney and really handsome, that's my luck." She said.
They were interrupted by Phoebe clearing her throat. She was deadly jealous; this blond bitch was flirting with him, the man she loved, the father of her daughter.
"Excuse me." Amanda said as she walked out of the office.
"So... the whole paper knew she's my daughter?" Cole asked a little mad.
"Well, I guess that they assumed it, coz we were you... you know... married and, well, she looks a lot like you." Phoebe replied. "Gossip runs around…"
"I have to go." He said, quickly changing the subject, it was hurting too much to talk about it.
He handed Prue to her mother, knowing that it would probably be the last time he was seeing her. He looked at her one more time and repeated to himself that it was what was the best to do.
He smiled sadly and simply said: "Goodbye Phoebe."
And with that he left the paper, forgetting all about what he came to do in the first place.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*
So, what do you guys think?? REVIEW now!!! Thanks.
Thanks a lot.
Chapter 9
"Our daughter."
*-*-*-*-*
Still wearing her Pj's and fluffy Silvester slippers, she popped in the kitchen by the smell of coffee and found her brother dressed for work pouring some coffee.
"Good Morning!" Alex cheerfully greeted as she warmly hugged her brother in a failed attempt to cheer him up as well.
"Morning." He coldly mumbled, like don't wanting to really talk. Alex poured some orange juice for her as she saw him quietly sitting on one of the kitchen's stool and silently staring at his cup of coffee. Just coffee, Alex noticed. Bitter, dark and black coffee, nothing else for breakfast; it wasn't like him, he used to drink his coffee with double cream and double sugar, and a little touch of cinnamon. He also used to take a pretty big and complete breakfast. 'The most important meal of the day.' She remembered him saying; besides he liked to fix it. He was a hell of a good cook for a demon. Maybe his alimentary habits these last days were a reflection of how he felt.
It had been like this for the last few days, he was like not talking, he wasn't angry anymore, but he wasn't happy either. He didn't smile, he didn't yell, he didn't bitch, he didn't rage… he just was like and empty and spare body, with no life, although the normal vital signs. She was so worry, because she didn't know what to do, he didn't talk to her, he didn't sleep, he didn't eat at all; he just went to work and came back late at night and go to bed. And he just answered like 'Yeah, whatever.' To everything she said to him. It was like nothing mattered to him.
She starred at him for a couple of minutes, and made another attempt; damn she had to try. "Cole…" she called for him as she came closer. He just raised his head with an 'what?' wondering expression.
"Wouldn't you like to have breakfast in a nice place?" she tried eyeing.
"No, I'm not hungry." He just replied avoiding look at her.
"Come on, it'll be fun… just like we used to do when I moved in." she continued without any result of enthusiasm from him. "You can choose, we could go for pancakes, we could have a muffin…or no, I know, croissants, your favorites." She tried. "Yes! We could shimmer to France and-" she excitedly tried.
"No." he said. "Some other time." He said and remanded quite.
"Ok, but we haven't hung out for days, why don't we have lunch together, hey we could go to this new Sushi place..." she proposed.
He just shook his head looking down. She needed to get his attention for something to get him out of this 'trance mood' state.
"Look, I cast a spell to make my nails grow longer, you can yell at me for that." She said showing her long French nails done. No response from him. She sighed.
"I'm going clubbing tonight…" she said.
"Ok." He said.
In other situation Alex would have disappeared and go partying for the next three days, but this wasn't right. "Look, you gotta snap out of this mood, Cole." She continued. "You're not like this… you yell at me for being home late, you laugh at my lack of fighting skills, you bitch about every case you get at work, you boss around, you make dark comments…" she told him. "You lecture me, you joke around, you enjoy a fine wine while listening to jazz… and now I just don't know who you are… you're just like a body with not life." She sincerely said.
"I don't feel like living." He said. Empty but deep reply.
She just sat in front of him facing him. "Look, why don't you talk to her?" she suggested. "You tell her you suspected it and she might just confirm and well, maybe you guys-"
"It's not meant to be." He simply said. "And it's all my fault. She's happy now and-"
"No!" she cut off. "You can't be the guilty party the whole time, because let's face it, she played the biggest bitch when she hid your daughter from you, but you can not, NOT do anything now that you know the truth either."
"You don't seem to understand!" he coldly barked as he left the kitchen in a total attempt to avoid the subject.
*-*-*-*-*-*
At the manor, Phoebe was in her room, lying on her bed with Prue in her arms. Jonathan had gone to some… some, she didn't even know where in the hell he was, all she cared was that the bastard was out of town and he wasn't around bothering her. It was early in the morning and the little one started crying, that's why Phoebe decided to pick her in bed with her, she didn't want to get up yet and wanted to spend a little time alone with her daughter. She was tickling the little girl's tummy, who was laughing out loud. It made Phoebe smile, even though she didn't really want to smile. But still she had to be strong for her baby, and she had to keep her promises to her daughter.
**** FLASHBACK****
Night- April 27th, 2003.
"Here's your baby all cleaned up, and ready for you to start breastfeeding." The nurse happily announced as she gave the new-born baby to her mother.
"Yay!" Phoebe exclaimed childish as she welcomed her arms to embrace her baby. "Thank you." She said.
"Your family had to leave after you gave birth, but they said they would be back soon. Something about an emergency." The woman informed.
"Thanks again, for everything." Phoebe said smiling.
"Ok, so here it…" The nurse said as she put a pink paper bracelet around Phoebe's wrist. "The baby's I.D. for now… Prudence Halliwell. I'll leave you alone, please call if you need anything." She said and Phoebe just nodded gratefully as she left and close the door behind her.
Once the nurse was gone, she turned her gaze to what she had between her arms. She still couldn't believe it. She had a baby, and she was a mom. She just was having the best and happiest moment in her life. It had been just a few hours since Prue had come to the world and Phoebe still couldn't believe it.
While the baby was nursing from her mother's breast, Phoebe couldn't help but smile. It felt weird, because it was the first time she was doing this, but it was great, amazingly and wonderfully weird. She saw her so tiny, so innocent, she still couldn't believe it… She was SOOOO happy, and proud and excited and… more scared than never in her life… now she was responsible for this little person, she had to do everything in the world to keep her alive and happy… then she glanced around and understood the situation of her reality… just like she was in that moment in that empty hospital room, it would be from now on… just her and her daughter. It just would be the two of them. It wasn't like her sisters and Leo would also be there, but it wasn't the same… just like in that moment, when they had to leave to vanquish the demon of the week…
Phoebe's thoughts were interrupted when Prue started crying, so Phoebe put her knees together and grabbed the baby in a way that she had her in front of her, lying on her legs…
"Shh.. baby…" she said and looked at her. She still was grabbing very softly and very careful because she was afraid she might break her, she was sooo tiny… the feeling she had in that moment was nothing alike to any thing she had felt in her life. Because of her duty as a Charmed One, she always had that feeling to protect the innocents, but this, this was a totally different and new thing for her, she just knew for instinct that she had to protect her and watch after her…
"Hey Prue… yes, that's you." she started looking at her. "Hi, I'm your mommy and I want you to know that you have made me the happiest woman in this world just for being here." She said, by now she had tears in her eyes, she couldn't help it, she was soo happy, but still was like scared that she might screw it and do something wrong… she was new on this. She kept staring at the baby in silence for a moment, when the baby started yawning.
"Baby, I see you're sleepy, sweet dreams, mommy will be here watching your sleep." She said and then in that moment, something happened, for the very first time Prue let her eyes wide open and stared at her mother, when this happened Phoebe was impressed to see those deep blue eyes staring at her once again… those same deep blue eyes that she feel in love with, those same blue eyes that loved her and comforted her…the same deep blue as Cole.
In that moment, when her daughter looked at her with that look, with those eyes, Phoebe realized that from now on, she and Cole would be united for the rest of their lives.
Now, She felt so alone and so vulnerable. She deadly wanted Cole to be there with them, just like any father protecting his family, but she had to face her reality. It wasn't like that, she was alone now, with her baby girl.
"It doesn't matter, sweetheart." She talked to her. "We don't need anybody. We'll be just fine. I swear to you that I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe and warm… no one will come before you. Ever. And if in any moment I can't be there for you, it won't be on purpose, it'll be because I'm doing something for you." She said while smoothly running her finger in her little head as she saw the baby peacefully sleeping. "I love you soo much and I'll always be there with and for you. And we won't need anyone else to be happy, because I'll take care of that… because if it's not like that I'll go and kick the destiny's butt myself." She said childish and her face wet with tears. "Your mommy can kick some serious butts, you know…" she said chuckling.
She sighed, "Anyway… never forget that I love you so much." She said kissing the sleeping baby's forehead.
"God bless you my darling." She gave Prue her blessings while realizing that now, she had to be responsible, strong, tolerant and assume any other attitude that might be needed in the future to protect her most important and beautiful innocent… her daughter.
***** END OF FLASHBACK *****
The guilt was overwhelming her, she deadly wanted to tell Cole about Prue, but she didn't know how, she was so afraid of his reaction. Looking at her daughter always made her think about Cole, they had the same smile, the same eyes...
Phoebe couldn't help but smile; Prue was so cute. The best for her would be to have a Daddy, an actual real Daddy; one who loved her, who really cared about her, not who only wanted to screw her mother like Jonathan.
"Yuck!" she mumbled, just the thought made her want to puke. Maybe was one of those post-natal aside effects; no sexual desire, and that plus the whole emotional charge and by now she was totally clear. She despised Jonathan, but she also loved Cole with all her heart. She wanted to dump Jonathan, but it was hard, she still felt commitment to him, he had been with her in a hard time, but still it wasn't working and she didn't know how long she would be able to bear with that bastard.
'It's for Evil to kill innocent people.' She kept repeating herself mentally.
Cole would be a perfect father; he was a perfect father, no doubts about that. Phoebe wanted him to be part of her family, to live happily with the both of them, but she knew it wouldn't work out, she had too many doubts, too many fears, too many everything... She wanted Cole to be Prue's father but she wasn't ready to have him as a lover. Everything was so complicated.
"I have to tell him, right baby?" She asked to her daughter.
In answer Prue gave her a big smile and Phoebe smiled as well.
She kissed her daughter on the cheek and said: "Mommy loves you baby, a lot."
"I'll go see your Daddy today and I'll tell him about you." She added.
She finally got up, took Prue in her arms and went to the kitchen to have breakfast.
After breakfast, she asked Paige to take care of Prue while because she had some things to take care of, of course, Paige agreed, she loved to watch Prue. Phoebe gave her daughter a bath, changed her and gave her to her Auntie Paige while she was having a shower and getting dressed. She was feeling nervous about telling Cole but she had to, she was decided to do it, at least for her daughter and also to have an easy conscience about it. Once she was ready, she went in Paige's room to kiss her daughter goodbye and she headed out of the manor towards the penthouse.
When she arrived there, she hesitated a lot before knocking at the door. Her hands were all sweaty; she was shaking nervously and trying to find the best way to tell him without hurting him or making him crazy. The only way she found was to tell him straight.
She finally knocked at the door and took a huge breath.
Cole opened the door and sternly asked: "What do you want?"
It almost hurt her the coldness in his voice. Still she didn't change her mind. She was decided to do it. She tried to cool off a little the mood. "How are you? How's Alex?" she asked.
Cole just sighed and buttoned his suit. "She's at college. Look, I have to go to work, and I doubt you came in a social visit, so please…" he said.
"I need to tell you something." She said.
"Go ahead." He replied without even looking at her as he was getting some documents inside his briefcase.
"Maybe you should sit down." She insisted.
At this Cole turned to look at her. "Whatever you want to say, just say it." He coldly said with a 'whatever' attitude.
Phoebe hesitated a little more and just said it. "Cole... Prue...uh… Prue… Prue is your daughter." She just let the words come out of her mouth waiting for a reaction.
Cole didn't react at all. And Phoebe was freaked because of it, so she decided to keep talking. "It happened when-"
"I know that already, Phoebe." He just cut off nodding and starring at her.
"Wh…wh-what? Excuse me?" she was the one who reacted now.
"But it doesn't change anything, right?" He coldly threw in.
"How did you-?" Phoebe still couldn't come out of her shock.
"It doesn't matter." He shook his head. "She's my daughter and you hid it from me, but I don't blame you."
Cole shrugged and said: "In fact, it's better like this, it's already hard to love one person when she's far away, I don't think I can handle two. You hid her from me since the beginning and we both were fine. I know why you came here. I know you, Phoebe and I know you feel guilty coz you let me saw her and in some way we bonded and well… now you think… uh… it doesn't work like this."
"I just..." She started.
"Save it Phoebe, just go and take care of your daughter, you have a family to take care of, I mean you even got her a father… and well, you are doing just fine and I have Alex so I'll be fine, we'll all be fine, end of the story." Cole told her.
Phoebe looked down and said: "I'm sorry… I just… I just wanted you to know about her, I wanted you to know you had a daughter. It was a mistake to hide her from you, I realize that, I had no right to do what I did… you had the right to know. I'm not asking you for a name, for money or for anything... I just wanted to let you know."
"That's really nice Phoebe." He said sarcastically.
She was about to talk but he cut her off and said: "I love you Phoebe, every damn second of my life I think about… I think about what happened between us over, and over and over again to see what I could change if I could have the luck to make it better. But I can't change what I've done or who I am. I know that even if we have this baby, we won't be together because it's not mean to be."
"I…" she started.
"No, let me finish." He stated. "Let me tell you a story, it's almost Christmas and there is that little boy looking at this wonderful toy he wants so much for Christmas. Everyday he passes by the shop and looks at his favorite toy, which look like gold to him. But the problem is that he hadn't been a good boy and he knows it, he knows he'll never have the luck to have that special toy he loves so much but still he keeps looking at it everyday without touching it, because he's been a bad boy and he's afraid he might break it." He continued.
"I'm that kid and us being happy as a family with our daughter is that toy." He finished.
Phoebe was at the verge of tears, she didn't know what to answer, she didn't know what to say. She wanted to hug him tightly and comfort him, she wanted to tell him that they could go back together and be happy, but she couldn't. She finally let the tears roll down her checks and that brought tears to Cole's eyes.
"Now go back home and take care of that little one." He said, he couldn't break in front of her; she had to leave before he started to cry.
He wiped away her tears and kissed her on the forehead.
"It's not your fault and I want you to know that I'll always be there for the both of you guys, I'll be watching you, even if I'm not a whitelighter, I'll be there." He added.
"Thank you." Phoebe whispered, unable to stop the tears that were rolling down her checks. Cole had barely heard her but this was sounding as a goodbye. He didn't want her to leave but he just couldn't stand the fact to be a part of her family, it was beyond his power, he just had to let her go and go on with her life with her baby girl, that's how it was meant to be, he knew he didn't deserve to have a happy life with the people he loved the much on earth.
He kissed her on the forehead one more time and she turned back and left.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Some hours later, it was lunch time and Alex had decided to stop by home to grab a sandwich, then she would catch one class in the afternoon and then she probably would go with Paige, they'd become close friends with the time… when she opened the door, it was strange to see her brother at lunch time in the penthouse.
"Hey." She said.
"Hi." He quietly replied.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I'm working from home." He replied coldly
"But you don't seem to be working." She said referring to his position, sitting on the floor, in a corner.
"Get out of here." He mumbled.
She sighed and came closer. "What happened?" she questioned.
"Phoebe was here…" he replied like he didn't care.
"And…?"
"She came to tell me everything. But.." He said and stayed quite.
"But…?" she stayed hanging.
"I'm not seeing her or the baby ever again." He replied.
"Why?"
"Because." He said not looking at her.
Alex tried to understand. "Don't tell me that she denied you the baby…" she started, Cole didn't say anything. "Oh shit… that's not fair, she can't just tell you and deny you to see your daughter." She said. "Look, you're Prue's biological father and we can prove it, so we can suit her and take Phoebe to court, so you'll get some custody. It's only fair." She said pretty excited about the legal procedure. "And if it doesn't work, we find the judge and I sleep with him, so you'll win and-"
"Phoebe didn't deny me anything." He clarified. "She just said she wanted to let me know." He added.
"And what are you gonna do?" she asked.
"Nothing."
"Nothing?!" she reacted. She couldn't believe it.
"What could I do anyway?" Cole questioned.
"You could get to spend some time with her. She deserves to have you as a dad." She suggested.
"You don't understand." Her brother said shaking his head.
"Ok, maybe I don't, but I'll just tell you one thing. You know why I didn't meet my dad?" she asked. "Because my mom killed him when I was three, and I'll never forgive her that… and in some point I hate my dad, because I'll never forgive him he let her go that far. In some level I feel like he didn't fight…" She said wiping a tear. "Would you like your daughter to feel the same way towards you?" she questioned. The issue really had touched her. "At least Phoebe's doing the first step, and I think it's only fair for that little one to have the grace to know his father." Cole just stayed there quite.
"You have no idea what I would have given to spend some time with mine..." she said wiping a tear.
*-*-*-*-*-*
The next day, Phoebe was in her office, it was pretty late and she had to take Prue with her because Paige and Piper were busy so, she put Prue on her car seat and put this one on her desk. She was trying to work on her column on the computer while trying to watch Prue at the same time. It was hard, because Prue was like wanting to cry for everything.
"Come on baby, be quiet please." Phoebe said.
"Mommy has to do some work and then we'll go home, eat, have a bath and go to bed." She added.
Prue just babbled in response. Phoebe went again to her column, but Prue started crying. So she went to her purse and gave her daughter her car keys and she started playing with them. It made Phoebe remember the time when she, Piper and Prue had to watch a baby, Prue had been using her powers to make all the things that was in her purse levitate to calm the baby.
'Damn where's an active telekinetic power when you need it?' she thought.
She was trying to keep Prue quite so people wouldn't notice that the little girl was there but suddenly, Elise got in her office, without knocking of course.
"Do we have a new Halliwell working for the advice column?" Elise asked, referring to Prue.
Phoebe smiled; she was surprised that her boss hadn't yelled at her in the first place.
"I'm sorry Elise, I know Prue is not supposed to be here but I couldn't find a babysitter, my sisters are all busy and..." Phoebe apologized.
"I understand." Elise sighed. "That's actually what I want to talk you about."
"Excuse me?" Phoebe was not following.
"The editor has been checking your recently work, and-" Elise commented.
"Is there something wrong?" Phoebe asked concerned.
Her boss opened her mouth trying to find the words. "Not exactly. It's just that since a while ago, your column is not what it used to be, it has changed." Elise explained.
"I have changed, I am a mother now." Phoebe said.
"I get that." Elise agreed. "It's just that it lost that spark, that… your work used to be like you icky, sexy and it always had that special touch… but now it's just regular stuff." Her boss explained.
"Well, I still give advise, it's just that it's expressed in a different way, from another perspective perhaps?" Phoebe defeated.
"It's not just that… it's… uh… you haven't showed up to a radio interview in months, and look at yourself… your image." Elise commented.
"What about it?"
"Look, I'm not saying you have to be all dressed like a model, but some make up wouldn't hurt… and I bet you haven't got your hair done in weeks, and you have baby stains on your clothes…" she said indicating to a stain on Phoebe's blouse. Prue had thrown up a little that day when they were on the elevator of the paper.
Phoebe sighed and looked down at Prue.
"Look, I understand what this is all like, I'm a mother myself and I went through this situation as well… but my point is that you have to be able to deal with the fact of being a mother and to keep it up with your work, because it's obviously been affected." She added.
Phoebe sighed once again. "I'll try to do my best." She said. Elise was right, but how to make enough time to take care of Prue, fight the demons, keep her image and keep it up doing an amazing job. It was impossible.
Then Elise took Prue in her arms. "Now, I'll take this beautiful with me while you finish your work." She acted like Phoebe was a kid and Prue was the toy distracting her from doing her homework; somehow, it was like that.
Phoebe was a little off by this, but then she couldn't help but smile. "Thanks Elise."
Elise smiled in return and said: "Deadline's tonight." She took Prue in her arms and walked out of the office.
In the mean time, Cole arrived at the paper, it was the last place he wanted to be, but he had to; he didn't have other choice, it was work. It was about a reporter who had got a lawsuit because of the means he had used to cover a big story. Cole hated this kind of cases, because it was hard to work with journalists since the most of the time there was an unknown source involved, which the journalist always insist on protect above everything. Cole had tried to pass this case to another partner from the firm, but they insisted him to take the case, because they would need someone like him to manage and win the case in court. He got in paper's office and saw a commotion.
Elise was surrounded by people, mostly women, looking at Prue, amazed of the beauty of Phoebe's daughter. They were all ticking her and talking to her, and she was just laughing and giggling. She practically had half of the staff 'enchanted.' She was sooo cute.
"Excuse me." Cole said, clearing his throat when he arrived towards the group.
"Oh, but here we got Prue's Daddy." Elise assumed. She remembered him, she knew he was Phoebe's ex-husband and Prue's blue eyes could only come from him.
"Elise they're calling you from publicity." Someone called for her.
"Excuse me." She said as she handed him the baby. Cole was feeling really weird, also shocked; it was when someone had called him Daddy, it was the first time he was really realizing that he was a father.
Prue started crying, Cole recognized this cry, his daughter needed to get changed.
"She needs to get changed." Cole said.
He kissed the baby on the forehead and started to rock her and she immediately calmed down.
"You can use my office, I won't need it for the moment." Elise offered pointing to her office while grabbing the phone.
Cole nodded and walked towards her office but he realized that Prue's diapers and everything she needed to get changed was probably with Phoebe. He stopped by his ex-wife office and knocked.
"Hi, Prue needs to get changed. Do you have things that might help here?" Cole asked.
Phoebe was taken aback; she was wondering what Cole was doing there, at the paper. She was so surprised that she forgot to ask him the reason of his presence there and gave her Prue's bag.
"Thanks." Cole told her and with that he walked out of the office to go in Elise's.
Once Prue was changed, Cole sat down on a chair with his daughter in his arms. He wanted to spend so time with her, alone. Prue was feeling good in her father's arms, gone were the cries and now she was brightly smiling. Cole took her little hand in his and starred at her, thinking how impossible it was for him to live with his baby girl. He had to stay out of her life because he wanted her to be safe. In a way, he knew Phoebe had made the right choice when she decided to hide her from him, it would have been too dangerous. Being a Charmed Ones' baby is already hard because every demon wanted to get you coz you're powerful, let's not talk about what it could have been if the whole underworld knew that Prue was also Cole's daughter. That's why he had to stay away from her and Phoebe. He only caused troubles in the past and already had lost a baby boy because of his evilness and he had hurt Phoebe more than any human being could handle. He loved the both of them so much that he had to let them go, and that's what he was going to do.
He took a huge breath and kissed Prue on the forehead.
"I just want you to know that I love you baby and I love your Mommy too. I'll always be watching you and Auntie Alex will let me know every single thing about you. I won't be there for your first word or your first step but, I'll keep an eye on you and your Mom." He said before kissing her one more time.
"I love you." He whispered, trying to fight his tears back.
A knock on the door interrupted him and a beautiful blond woman, who was also Elise's secretary, entered the office. She put some papers on Elise's desk and she smiled at Cole and he smiled back.
"Your daughter is so cute, just like her Daddy." The girl said in a seductive way.
"Thank you." Cole replied. He still couldn't get used of being called Daddy.
"So, you're Phoebe's ex-husband." She asked.
"Yeah. Cole Turner." He said.
"Amanda Caldwell." She said, as they shook hands.
"And what do you do for a living, Mr. Turner?" She asked already hitting on him.
"I'm an attorney." He replied.
"An attorney and really handsome, that's my luck." She said.
They were interrupted by Phoebe clearing her throat. She was deadly jealous; this blond bitch was flirting with him, the man she loved, the father of her daughter.
"Excuse me." Amanda said as she walked out of the office.
"So... the whole paper knew she's my daughter?" Cole asked a little mad.
"Well, I guess that they assumed it, coz we were you... you know... married and, well, she looks a lot like you." Phoebe replied. "Gossip runs around…"
"I have to go." He said, quickly changing the subject, it was hurting too much to talk about it.
He handed Prue to her mother, knowing that it would probably be the last time he was seeing her. He looked at her one more time and repeated to himself that it was what was the best to do.
He smiled sadly and simply said: "Goodbye Phoebe."
And with that he left the paper, forgetting all about what he came to do in the first place.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*
So, what do you guys think?? REVIEW now!!! Thanks.