I've decided to do another interesting disclaimer:
I don't own the Captain,
Named James T. Kirk,
Nor do I own Scotty,
who makes everything work.
I don't own Spock,
the only Vulcan abroad,
McCoy isn't mine,
who works in the Medical ward.
I don't own Chekov,
with a accent that's Russian,
Nor do I own Uhura,
who makes sure things get done.
Sulu isn't mine,
who works on steering.
I don't own ferangi,
who are always sneering.
The only things I own
are Ensign Snodgrass,
and Fargo the Ferangi
who couldn't pass a Math Class.
Kinda lame. O well.
CHAPTER TWO In which we get to witness Spock's most embarresing moment.
(except for the time in Amok time were he said "Jim!" That was more embarresing)
Scene 4
Narrator-Meanwhile, we have Kirk, McCoy, Spock, and Uhura on the bridge.
Uhura-I'm sorry, sir. I just couldn't find any Christmas lights.
Kirk-That's OK. I found some lightblubs in Sulu's bag and had Chekov put them
up. I'm sure he won't mind. And if he does, well, I'm James T. Kirk!
McCoy-What's in the bag, Spock?
Spock-Merely scientific experiments. I'm sure you would not be interested,
Doctor.
McCoy-Sheesh, Spock. Everyone sure is feeling protective of their bags, today.
Spock-I am not protective of my bags, Doctor. That would be illogical. I was
merely saying, that since you usually do not find my experiments interesting, you
most likely would not be intrigued by my bag's content.
Scene 5
Narrator-Later at night.
Snodgrass-(Is on post as a security guard on the bridge)Why do I always have to
be a guard? Why can't they leave on more lights?(Looks around and sees a bag by
Sulu's chair)Is that my bag? Why is it empty? Did somebody steal my lightbulbs?
Why would someone want to steal lightbulbs?(Looks at the bag that Chekov left
by his chair)Is that my bag, instead?(Looks in it)Did the magic lightbulb fairy
leave Russian artifacts in this bag in exchange for lightbulbs?(Takes both bags
down the hall)Should I give Sulu his bag back?(Leaves bag by the door he
*thinks* is Sulu's room. It's really Kirk's room) Should I go back to guarding? I'd
better put my bag away first.(Puts his bag away)
Scene 6
Narrator-Later, that same night......
McCoy-(In his corridors)Gosh, I need an aspirin. Arguing with Spock sure gives
you a migraine. I mean, it's hard to always win! He's so determined to prove
everything has to be logical! (Looks for his bag) Darn it, I left it on the bridge.
(Goes it bridge. Is stopped by security guard)Hey, ensign.......What is it again?
Snodgrass-(Miserably)Why is so difficult to remember Snodgrass? It's a perfectly
normal name, right?
McCoy-Can you get me my bag? Oh..(Thinks, then smiles)and Mister Spock's bag
to, if you please?
Snodgrass-Who's Mister Spock?
McCoy-Ha! Now you can't remember names!
Snodgrass-(Lying)I mean, of course I know who Mister Spock is! He's the Vulcan,
right?
McCoy-(Laughing)No, he's human!
Snodgrass-Oh, OK. (Goes on to bridge)
McCoy-I was joking! Imagine, Spock being human!
Narrator-Snodgrass thought Spock was a Vulcan. When he hears he's human, he
wonders if maybe he's thinking of the wrong person. He looks and sees two bags.
Snodgrass-Those must be it. Who else's bags could they be?
Narrator-Anyones, really.
Snodgrass-Did I ask you?
Narrator-(Pouting)Well *EXCUUUSE* me! Nobody every askes me anything!
Snodgrass-Well, nobody asks me anyone either!
Narrator-That's because you're to busy asking them questions!
Snodgrass-Whatever. (Grabs the two bags and takes them
back to McCoy)Here so go, sir.
McCoy-Thanks.(Takes bags and begins walking down the corridor. Stops at
Spock's room)Hmmmmm. I just bet Spock has something embarrassing in here! I
have to open it! That's what I do, ruin Spock's dignity! It's in the job description!
(McCoy opens the bag)What's this? (It contains papers) What's these
papers?(Reads)Ha! They're letters from Spock's mother!(Failing to imitate
Spock's voice) These letters express illogical emotions.(Goes back to his normal
voice) I didn't know Amanda called Spock "Her little Jimmy". I wonder how
Spock feels?(Snickers)Well, that was funny. Thanks Spock, I don't need to take an
aspirin now, my head doesn't hurt.
Narrator-McCoy decides to leave Spock's bag outside his room.
McCoy-Hey! Who said I was going to do that!
Narrator-It says so in the script.
McCoy-I don't have to decide that just because the script says so!
Narrator-Come on! You have to follow the script!
McCoy-NO I don't! I can decide whatever I want!
Narrator-Fine! Don't follow the script! The play can just make no sense! That's
fine with me!
McCoy-Good!
(Pause)
McCoy-I think I've decided to leave Spock's bag outside his room.
Narrator-(Rolls eyes and sighs) Hmmmpf! Glad you've decided. McCoy goes back
to his room with a brown, leather suitcase.
Scene 7
Narrator-In the morning, Kirk opens his door to find a brown, leather suitcase
outside his room.
Kirk-Oh, some ensign must have put it there. I forgot and left it on the
bridge.(looks around to make sure nobody is looking)I hope nobody saw these.
(Opens bag and sees that it's empty)Oh no! Somebody stole my mother's letters!
If Bones found out that she calls me "Her little Jimmy" I'll never hear the end of
it!(Thinking)I need to find out who stole it!(Looks around
suspiciously)Hmmmm.
Narrator-It wasn't me.
Kirk-Arrrgh!(Throws bag down the hall)I need to find out who stole the letters.
My reputation depends on it. (Goes to bridge)
Narrator-Now, Uhura happens to be walking down the corridors minutes after
Kirk leaves.
Uhura-Look! A bag!
PearlGirl's Voice-(Sarcastically)No, really? That's a really stupid line! Who made
that line anyway?
Uhura-You! You, wrote the script!
PearlGirl's Voice-Oh yeah, Heh, heh. I knew that. Carry on.
Uhura-That looks like my bag! I guess it is my bag. What are the chances of all the
bridge crew plus Ensign Snodgrass all having the same bag?
Narrator-(Mutters)Getting better all the time, I'd say.
Uhura-I guess I'll bring it to my corridors.
Narrator-As soon as she leaves, Spock comes out of his room. As he starts to walk
out the door, he does the closes he has ever come to a trip. He snags his foot on
the bag that was outside his door. To prevent himself from tripping, he leans
backward. Unfortunately, the Vulcan misjuded the force it would need, thus
causing him to start falling backward. In one swift movement, he grabbed the
doorframe, and heaved himself forward. It only took a split second, but it was
certainly a most undignified split second. Fortunately for Spock, I was the only
one to see it.
Spock-(Picks up bag)It is illogical to place a bag by someone's door, thus making
it an object to cumbersome the owner. I assume someone saw my bag that I left
on the bridge, and decided to return it. I believe I will refrain from leaving my bag
anywhere but in my room in the future.(Picks up bag and goes back into room)
Poor Spockie. He doesn't know how many people are reading his embarresing moment. Now for a Christmas Present I want REVIEWS!!!!!
REVIEWERS
Alania- Yo sis. Thanks for reviewing! Yo were right, I did get reviews, even though this story is random beyond belief!
Empress Leia- Weeellll, I hope you figure out where exactly you live. I would definatly be a good idea. I'm glad that Fargo really is in North Dakota. I just guessed. It's been a loooong time since fourth grade when I had to know state capial. I'm bad at capitals. Good thing I can at least still remember the captial of the state I live in. Now, what is it again?
Tavia- Yeah, I'm busy too. With CHRISTMAS!! I love Christmas. And of course, a break from school. Continue with Trekkie Soul.
I don't own the Captain,
Named James T. Kirk,
Nor do I own Scotty,
who makes everything work.
I don't own Spock,
the only Vulcan abroad,
McCoy isn't mine,
who works in the Medical ward.
I don't own Chekov,
with a accent that's Russian,
Nor do I own Uhura,
who makes sure things get done.
Sulu isn't mine,
who works on steering.
I don't own ferangi,
who are always sneering.
The only things I own
are Ensign Snodgrass,
and Fargo the Ferangi
who couldn't pass a Math Class.
Kinda lame. O well.
CHAPTER TWO In which we get to witness Spock's most embarresing moment.
(except for the time in Amok time were he said "Jim!" That was more embarresing)
Scene 4
Narrator-Meanwhile, we have Kirk, McCoy, Spock, and Uhura on the bridge.
Uhura-I'm sorry, sir. I just couldn't find any Christmas lights.
Kirk-That's OK. I found some lightblubs in Sulu's bag and had Chekov put them
up. I'm sure he won't mind. And if he does, well, I'm James T. Kirk!
McCoy-What's in the bag, Spock?
Spock-Merely scientific experiments. I'm sure you would not be interested,
Doctor.
McCoy-Sheesh, Spock. Everyone sure is feeling protective of their bags, today.
Spock-I am not protective of my bags, Doctor. That would be illogical. I was
merely saying, that since you usually do not find my experiments interesting, you
most likely would not be intrigued by my bag's content.
Scene 5
Narrator-Later at night.
Snodgrass-(Is on post as a security guard on the bridge)Why do I always have to
be a guard? Why can't they leave on more lights?(Looks around and sees a bag by
Sulu's chair)Is that my bag? Why is it empty? Did somebody steal my lightbulbs?
Why would someone want to steal lightbulbs?(Looks at the bag that Chekov left
by his chair)Is that my bag, instead?(Looks in it)Did the magic lightbulb fairy
leave Russian artifacts in this bag in exchange for lightbulbs?(Takes both bags
down the hall)Should I give Sulu his bag back?(Leaves bag by the door he
*thinks* is Sulu's room. It's really Kirk's room) Should I go back to guarding? I'd
better put my bag away first.(Puts his bag away)
Scene 6
Narrator-Later, that same night......
McCoy-(In his corridors)Gosh, I need an aspirin. Arguing with Spock sure gives
you a migraine. I mean, it's hard to always win! He's so determined to prove
everything has to be logical! (Looks for his bag) Darn it, I left it on the bridge.
(Goes it bridge. Is stopped by security guard)Hey, ensign.......What is it again?
Snodgrass-(Miserably)Why is so difficult to remember Snodgrass? It's a perfectly
normal name, right?
McCoy-Can you get me my bag? Oh..(Thinks, then smiles)and Mister Spock's bag
to, if you please?
Snodgrass-Who's Mister Spock?
McCoy-Ha! Now you can't remember names!
Snodgrass-(Lying)I mean, of course I know who Mister Spock is! He's the Vulcan,
right?
McCoy-(Laughing)No, he's human!
Snodgrass-Oh, OK. (Goes on to bridge)
McCoy-I was joking! Imagine, Spock being human!
Narrator-Snodgrass thought Spock was a Vulcan. When he hears he's human, he
wonders if maybe he's thinking of the wrong person. He looks and sees two bags.
Snodgrass-Those must be it. Who else's bags could they be?
Narrator-Anyones, really.
Snodgrass-Did I ask you?
Narrator-(Pouting)Well *EXCUUUSE* me! Nobody every askes me anything!
Snodgrass-Well, nobody asks me anyone either!
Narrator-That's because you're to busy asking them questions!
Snodgrass-Whatever. (Grabs the two bags and takes them
back to McCoy)Here so go, sir.
McCoy-Thanks.(Takes bags and begins walking down the corridor. Stops at
Spock's room)Hmmmmm. I just bet Spock has something embarrassing in here! I
have to open it! That's what I do, ruin Spock's dignity! It's in the job description!
(McCoy opens the bag)What's this? (It contains papers) What's these
papers?(Reads)Ha! They're letters from Spock's mother!(Failing to imitate
Spock's voice) These letters express illogical emotions.(Goes back to his normal
voice) I didn't know Amanda called Spock "Her little Jimmy". I wonder how
Spock feels?(Snickers)Well, that was funny. Thanks Spock, I don't need to take an
aspirin now, my head doesn't hurt.
Narrator-McCoy decides to leave Spock's bag outside his room.
McCoy-Hey! Who said I was going to do that!
Narrator-It says so in the script.
McCoy-I don't have to decide that just because the script says so!
Narrator-Come on! You have to follow the script!
McCoy-NO I don't! I can decide whatever I want!
Narrator-Fine! Don't follow the script! The play can just make no sense! That's
fine with me!
McCoy-Good!
(Pause)
McCoy-I think I've decided to leave Spock's bag outside his room.
Narrator-(Rolls eyes and sighs) Hmmmpf! Glad you've decided. McCoy goes back
to his room with a brown, leather suitcase.
Scene 7
Narrator-In the morning, Kirk opens his door to find a brown, leather suitcase
outside his room.
Kirk-Oh, some ensign must have put it there. I forgot and left it on the
bridge.(looks around to make sure nobody is looking)I hope nobody saw these.
(Opens bag and sees that it's empty)Oh no! Somebody stole my mother's letters!
If Bones found out that she calls me "Her little Jimmy" I'll never hear the end of
it!(Thinking)I need to find out who stole it!(Looks around
suspiciously)Hmmmm.
Narrator-It wasn't me.
Kirk-Arrrgh!(Throws bag down the hall)I need to find out who stole the letters.
My reputation depends on it. (Goes to bridge)
Narrator-Now, Uhura happens to be walking down the corridors minutes after
Kirk leaves.
Uhura-Look! A bag!
PearlGirl's Voice-(Sarcastically)No, really? That's a really stupid line! Who made
that line anyway?
Uhura-You! You, wrote the script!
PearlGirl's Voice-Oh yeah, Heh, heh. I knew that. Carry on.
Uhura-That looks like my bag! I guess it is my bag. What are the chances of all the
bridge crew plus Ensign Snodgrass all having the same bag?
Narrator-(Mutters)Getting better all the time, I'd say.
Uhura-I guess I'll bring it to my corridors.
Narrator-As soon as she leaves, Spock comes out of his room. As he starts to walk
out the door, he does the closes he has ever come to a trip. He snags his foot on
the bag that was outside his door. To prevent himself from tripping, he leans
backward. Unfortunately, the Vulcan misjuded the force it would need, thus
causing him to start falling backward. In one swift movement, he grabbed the
doorframe, and heaved himself forward. It only took a split second, but it was
certainly a most undignified split second. Fortunately for Spock, I was the only
one to see it.
Spock-(Picks up bag)It is illogical to place a bag by someone's door, thus making
it an object to cumbersome the owner. I assume someone saw my bag that I left
on the bridge, and decided to return it. I believe I will refrain from leaving my bag
anywhere but in my room in the future.(Picks up bag and goes back into room)
Poor Spockie. He doesn't know how many people are reading his embarresing moment. Now for a Christmas Present I want REVIEWS!!!!!
REVIEWERS
Alania- Yo sis. Thanks for reviewing! Yo were right, I did get reviews, even though this story is random beyond belief!
Empress Leia- Weeellll, I hope you figure out where exactly you live. I would definatly be a good idea. I'm glad that Fargo really is in North Dakota. I just guessed. It's been a loooong time since fourth grade when I had to know state capial. I'm bad at capitals. Good thing I can at least still remember the captial of the state I live in. Now, what is it again?
Tavia- Yeah, I'm busy too. With CHRISTMAS!! I love Christmas. And of course, a break from school. Continue with Trekkie Soul.