Author's Notes: First of all, I would like to thank everyone for being kind
to review. You honestly have no idea how much it means to me. You people
are the best! Okay, this chapter was a little hard to write, but I already
know exactly what will happen in the next one, so please review, and
hopefully I can upload this weekend! Thanks again!
Lady Riddle: Thanks so much for your support! I'm glad you enjoyed this...I feel so honored...one of your favorite HPCC authors? Aww...and to compare me to J.K. Rowling...whoa...
Audrey Lebeke: Thank you, so, so much for helping me with this! You rock!
Karri- Granger: Stop, you're making me blush...but seriously, thank you for your amazingly kind comments!
Logical Raven: I've read all of your HPCC fics...and all I have to say, is why are you reading my fic when you should be writing, so I can read the next chapter of yours? Lol...but really, please update your fic soon, and thanks for reviewing.
Gwendolyn James: Thanks so much! I know you're a teacher, so it makes me feel a bit better about my writing abilities...
: Thank you for your great support! I feel so loved now...Thank you, thank you, thank you!
ROsE- ofHeL: Thanks...that was a really nice and sweet review! You're flattering me...
SomniumSeeker: You really liked it? Wow! Thanks! Hope you like the next chapter...
Once again, thanks to all my awesome reviewers! And I will update as soon as possible...
The next Hogsmeade weekend is posted up. It'll be Valentine's Day, and all the couples are going. I glance over at the Gryffindor table to see if you've noticed, and sure enough, you have.
She's sitting very close to you, and you two are whispering to each other, with a look on your face that says you've forgotten the rest of the world; all you can see is her right now.
I've always wanted to be looked at like that. Like I was the most important person in the world, as if nothing else mattered.
That blade that is in my heart always is turning, delving deeper, and deeper, until soon, it will not be able to go any farther.
I sit perfectly still, watching my pumpkin juice in my goblet swirl around, and around. My head is throbbing, though I'm aware that I'm not moving.
Marietta turns towards me, and asks if I plan on going to Hogsmeade. I force a smile, and nod cheerfully.
My mask is on. Always on. Always happy, always friendly, always cheerful, always beautiful. Always perfect.
But inside, inside, I'm slowly ebbing away, like the shoreline of beaches, overcome by the foaming water. I'm destroying myself from the inside, and I know this.
The sad thing is, I don't care. I don't care anymore. I've stopped caring. I would've thought I had stopped feeling, as well, but apparently not, because every time I see your face, my heart bursts open, like a fresh new wound.
After breakfast, she comes up to me. I stare blankly, even coldly at her. What could she want now?
She smiles nervously. "Cho? I just wanted to apologize for what I said a couple of days ago. I shouldn't have been so rude. It was, just, that I was so worried over Harry, I forgot my manners."
I look at her with icy disdain. "I bet Harry told you to come over here and say that."
She looked so surprised, and genuinely hurt, that I knew I was wrong. "No, he didn't."
Sighing, I nodded. "I accept your apology." I turned and walked stiffly to class.
When I sit down, I put my head in my arms. So, she is perfect for you. So she is nice.
I hate her; I hate her because I can't hate her. I hate her because she does deserve you. She does, she really does.
And I'm happy and sad about this fact at the same time, because I do want you to be happy, I really do. But... there is that part of me that wishes it were me instead of her...
I feel as if there's nothing inside of me, and yet, I feel the heaviest weight in the world, like lead, on my chest.
No wonder all those unrequited loves killed themselves.
I, of course, would never dream of such a thing, but that's only because of you. It's only because of you that I try to go on going through the motions of life, because, during the few times I do get to see you, get a glimpse into your wonderful eyes, well, it fights off a little bit of the darkness, the depression, the misery, the sadness, the pain that is eating at me, everyday, constantly.
I wish I could cry. I wish I could find some way of letting out this terrible feeling I have, bottled up inside of me. But I can't. My only form of release, my only form of freedom, my only form of hope, is you.
The Hogsmeade weekend comes up much too soon for my liking. I will be forced to go with Marietta, and my other Housemates to Hogsmeade, and act like I'm having a good time.
I'm a very good actress; sometimes I almost manage to convince myself that I'm fine. But then, I see your face once more, and the pain comes rushing back, overwhelming me even more than before.
Marietta drags me to Hogsmeade, chattering aimlessly all the way. I nod, and throw in the occasional "Yes, of course." Or "Hmm..." Really, I'm watching you. Again. With her, as usual.
Your arms, your strong, Qudditch-toned arms, are draped casually around her waist. Her fiery red hair glimmers in the sunlight, and you laugh, teasing her about something.
My heart seems to clench. I never made you laugh, ever. I was too busying crying over Cedric. How I wish I had a Time-Turner. How I wish I hadn't been so utterly stupid.
As we get closer to you, I notice that you have dark hollows under your stunning eyes. Why haven't you been sleeping?
I want, more than anything right now, to give you a hug. You look in desperate need of one. But you have her for that...
Marietta wants to go to the Three Broomsticks to meet someone there. I sigh, but go along with her. She tells me to get a table, and she goes to get drinks.
I sit, alone, at the empty table, waiting for Marietta. I see a blond seventh year Hufflepuff boy shyly talking to her. Getting up, I motion to her that I'm leaving. She barely nods, smiling at the Hufflepuff. I make my discreet exit. I just couldn't stay there any longer.
I don't know exactly where I'm going; I'm walking, and walking, until I stop. Taking a look at the sign above the door, which I stopped at, my heart sinks. This is Madam Puddifoot's, the very same place where our first, and last date took place.
And through the frosted glass windows, I can vaguely see a familiar messy, jet-black head, and a bright red one next to it. The door is open, and I turn to leave, but someone catches on to my arm.
I can hardly believe my eyes...
Author's Notes: Sorry for the cliffhanger there! I promise, all will be revealed in the next chapter...that I am already in the process of writing. So, tell me...who do you think this mysterious person is? Please review! Hugs and kisses to you all!
Lady Riddle: Thanks so much for your support! I'm glad you enjoyed this...I feel so honored...one of your favorite HPCC authors? Aww...and to compare me to J.K. Rowling...whoa...
Audrey Lebeke: Thank you, so, so much for helping me with this! You rock!
Karri- Granger: Stop, you're making me blush...but seriously, thank you for your amazingly kind comments!
Logical Raven: I've read all of your HPCC fics...and all I have to say, is why are you reading my fic when you should be writing, so I can read the next chapter of yours? Lol...but really, please update your fic soon, and thanks for reviewing.
Gwendolyn James: Thanks so much! I know you're a teacher, so it makes me feel a bit better about my writing abilities...
: Thank you for your great support! I feel so loved now...Thank you, thank you, thank you!
ROsE- ofHeL: Thanks...that was a really nice and sweet review! You're flattering me...
SomniumSeeker: You really liked it? Wow! Thanks! Hope you like the next chapter...
Once again, thanks to all my awesome reviewers! And I will update as soon as possible...
The next Hogsmeade weekend is posted up. It'll be Valentine's Day, and all the couples are going. I glance over at the Gryffindor table to see if you've noticed, and sure enough, you have.
She's sitting very close to you, and you two are whispering to each other, with a look on your face that says you've forgotten the rest of the world; all you can see is her right now.
I've always wanted to be looked at like that. Like I was the most important person in the world, as if nothing else mattered.
That blade that is in my heart always is turning, delving deeper, and deeper, until soon, it will not be able to go any farther.
I sit perfectly still, watching my pumpkin juice in my goblet swirl around, and around. My head is throbbing, though I'm aware that I'm not moving.
Marietta turns towards me, and asks if I plan on going to Hogsmeade. I force a smile, and nod cheerfully.
My mask is on. Always on. Always happy, always friendly, always cheerful, always beautiful. Always perfect.
But inside, inside, I'm slowly ebbing away, like the shoreline of beaches, overcome by the foaming water. I'm destroying myself from the inside, and I know this.
The sad thing is, I don't care. I don't care anymore. I've stopped caring. I would've thought I had stopped feeling, as well, but apparently not, because every time I see your face, my heart bursts open, like a fresh new wound.
After breakfast, she comes up to me. I stare blankly, even coldly at her. What could she want now?
She smiles nervously. "Cho? I just wanted to apologize for what I said a couple of days ago. I shouldn't have been so rude. It was, just, that I was so worried over Harry, I forgot my manners."
I look at her with icy disdain. "I bet Harry told you to come over here and say that."
She looked so surprised, and genuinely hurt, that I knew I was wrong. "No, he didn't."
Sighing, I nodded. "I accept your apology." I turned and walked stiffly to class.
When I sit down, I put my head in my arms. So, she is perfect for you. So she is nice.
I hate her; I hate her because I can't hate her. I hate her because she does deserve you. She does, she really does.
And I'm happy and sad about this fact at the same time, because I do want you to be happy, I really do. But... there is that part of me that wishes it were me instead of her...
I feel as if there's nothing inside of me, and yet, I feel the heaviest weight in the world, like lead, on my chest.
No wonder all those unrequited loves killed themselves.
I, of course, would never dream of such a thing, but that's only because of you. It's only because of you that I try to go on going through the motions of life, because, during the few times I do get to see you, get a glimpse into your wonderful eyes, well, it fights off a little bit of the darkness, the depression, the misery, the sadness, the pain that is eating at me, everyday, constantly.
I wish I could cry. I wish I could find some way of letting out this terrible feeling I have, bottled up inside of me. But I can't. My only form of release, my only form of freedom, my only form of hope, is you.
The Hogsmeade weekend comes up much too soon for my liking. I will be forced to go with Marietta, and my other Housemates to Hogsmeade, and act like I'm having a good time.
I'm a very good actress; sometimes I almost manage to convince myself that I'm fine. But then, I see your face once more, and the pain comes rushing back, overwhelming me even more than before.
Marietta drags me to Hogsmeade, chattering aimlessly all the way. I nod, and throw in the occasional "Yes, of course." Or "Hmm..." Really, I'm watching you. Again. With her, as usual.
Your arms, your strong, Qudditch-toned arms, are draped casually around her waist. Her fiery red hair glimmers in the sunlight, and you laugh, teasing her about something.
My heart seems to clench. I never made you laugh, ever. I was too busying crying over Cedric. How I wish I had a Time-Turner. How I wish I hadn't been so utterly stupid.
As we get closer to you, I notice that you have dark hollows under your stunning eyes. Why haven't you been sleeping?
I want, more than anything right now, to give you a hug. You look in desperate need of one. But you have her for that...
Marietta wants to go to the Three Broomsticks to meet someone there. I sigh, but go along with her. She tells me to get a table, and she goes to get drinks.
I sit, alone, at the empty table, waiting for Marietta. I see a blond seventh year Hufflepuff boy shyly talking to her. Getting up, I motion to her that I'm leaving. She barely nods, smiling at the Hufflepuff. I make my discreet exit. I just couldn't stay there any longer.
I don't know exactly where I'm going; I'm walking, and walking, until I stop. Taking a look at the sign above the door, which I stopped at, my heart sinks. This is Madam Puddifoot's, the very same place where our first, and last date took place.
And through the frosted glass windows, I can vaguely see a familiar messy, jet-black head, and a bright red one next to it. The door is open, and I turn to leave, but someone catches on to my arm.
I can hardly believe my eyes...
Author's Notes: Sorry for the cliffhanger there! I promise, all will be revealed in the next chapter...that I am already in the process of writing. So, tell me...who do you think this mysterious person is? Please review! Hugs and kisses to you all!