The rising sun cast an eerie glow in the serene cerulean eyes that were placidly scanning the camp. None were awake, yet. effortlessly he made no noise and creeped over to the greasy hairy man who had previously embarrassed him the prior. The blonde deftly tied a silk stocking around the mans mouth so he could not scream. Smirking rather vehemently, he dragged the flailing man off into the woods, carrying a small bag upon his shoulder. He made sure to hit every hole and rock he could without damaging the mans brain further.
The elf was swiftly tying his hostage to a tall tree with the rope he borrowed from Gandalf. The old wizard owed him anyway. Back to the hostage, he was almost stripped to nothing, just donning the leggings and that's about it. He was gagged efficiently, and was thrashing about as the elf took out an amber viscous liquid. "Oh you want to know what im going to do with this eh? Well lets just hope you wore skivvies to bed last night." And the elf tore down the leggings, thanking Ulmo when he saw that the man indeed was wearing underclothes, although slightly graying, but still it was better than nothing.
Being as impatient as the blonde elf was he opened the jar and immediately stuck his hand in it, and cackled evilly when he saw the man stop thrashing about and go wide eyed. Without hesitation he smeared it all over the mans hairy chest, on his sides, his arms, everywhere below the neck except what was covered by the underclothes. Even the feet. "Have fun my fair friend, and even if you do scream, no one could hear you but me, we're that far into the woods. I'll come back later to check on you. Have a nice day." The elf flounced away laughing to himself loudly.
The man had been able to wriggle the silk stocking out of his mouth and was breathing hard due to his newly started up thrashing again. He stopped when he heard a rustling noise a little ways off in the brush. He kept his eyes wide open and opened his mouth in terror when he saw a hoof step out into his clearing.
Everyone was now wide awake and started clearing out the dishes from last night in order to make breakfast that morning. A few of the others had been curious to Striders whereabouts, "Hey Legolas, it was you're duty last night and this morning, did you see Strider go off on his own? We want to save him some breakfast" what a cute little guy that Pippin was, always thinking of others. "He went off hunting, he should be back..." Legolas was unable to finish his statement as a ear piercing extremely loud, glass shattering bellow racked through camp, coming from the neighboring forest.
"That sounds like young Strider." Gandalf said standing immediately. He coulnt help himself, Legolas burst out laughing.
The rest of the fellowship ran after the elf, as he ran into the forest in search of Strider/Aragorn. It was not hard to follow him due to his loud bellowings. Finally reaching him they all stood there, some blanched at the sight of their almost nude leader, but they all stood there in shock for a moment before having to hold onto something or someone for support. They were laughing their asses off.
"Ara-aragorn... What in the name of Ulmo are you screeching about.... its a harmless..." Legolas could not find the strength to finish his sentence as he started to cry from laughter yet again. After laughing for a wee bit longer, the elf stood up and composed himself. "It was a harmless rabid fangirl my dear friend.... She wouldn't have hurt you in a million years. In fact shes rather cute." The girl was making obscene and perverted comments every few seconds. "Lets call her Pervita!" Aragorn was glowering at the elf. . Legolas had shooed the others away, he didnt want the Hobbits to lose their innocence, before bending down to his small package and retrieving a pair of scissors.
"Now that your first part of fun is over, lets go onto phase two." The sun glinted lethally off of the metal blades. "Now, dont get hasty on me Legolas..." The man pleaded pressing himself as tight as he could up against the tree. "How about a do it yourself vasectomy? I do imagine it would be fun... on my part." The blonde open and shut the scissors a few times smiling rather psychotically at them. "Snip snip snip." The scissors were lowered down to the level with Aragorns ahem.
Day 31
I cannot believe the nerve of that elf. Who the hell does he think he is? I still haven't gotten all of the honey off my chest... I almost lost precious again... he was going to cut it off with a pair of old scissors! but he did tie the rope down there so I guess my reactions were unfounded... But you should never joke about that! I read the last entry by the elf.. I cannot wait to see what he has in store for Gandalf... Legolas has become rather spiteful.... but hell as long as he stays away from me....
[the flowing script returned]
Be forewarned man, I am not done with you.
[the scrawl returned]
Damn.
Maybe not forever yours, but for now, Aragorn.
[A/N whoo its been a while, and I know i switched names throught the thing, but if you dont like it, screw u idk]
The elf was swiftly tying his hostage to a tall tree with the rope he borrowed from Gandalf. The old wizard owed him anyway. Back to the hostage, he was almost stripped to nothing, just donning the leggings and that's about it. He was gagged efficiently, and was thrashing about as the elf took out an amber viscous liquid. "Oh you want to know what im going to do with this eh? Well lets just hope you wore skivvies to bed last night." And the elf tore down the leggings, thanking Ulmo when he saw that the man indeed was wearing underclothes, although slightly graying, but still it was better than nothing.
Being as impatient as the blonde elf was he opened the jar and immediately stuck his hand in it, and cackled evilly when he saw the man stop thrashing about and go wide eyed. Without hesitation he smeared it all over the mans hairy chest, on his sides, his arms, everywhere below the neck except what was covered by the underclothes. Even the feet. "Have fun my fair friend, and even if you do scream, no one could hear you but me, we're that far into the woods. I'll come back later to check on you. Have a nice day." The elf flounced away laughing to himself loudly.
The man had been able to wriggle the silk stocking out of his mouth and was breathing hard due to his newly started up thrashing again. He stopped when he heard a rustling noise a little ways off in the brush. He kept his eyes wide open and opened his mouth in terror when he saw a hoof step out into his clearing.
Everyone was now wide awake and started clearing out the dishes from last night in order to make breakfast that morning. A few of the others had been curious to Striders whereabouts, "Hey Legolas, it was you're duty last night and this morning, did you see Strider go off on his own? We want to save him some breakfast" what a cute little guy that Pippin was, always thinking of others. "He went off hunting, he should be back..." Legolas was unable to finish his statement as a ear piercing extremely loud, glass shattering bellow racked through camp, coming from the neighboring forest.
"That sounds like young Strider." Gandalf said standing immediately. He coulnt help himself, Legolas burst out laughing.
The rest of the fellowship ran after the elf, as he ran into the forest in search of Strider/Aragorn. It was not hard to follow him due to his loud bellowings. Finally reaching him they all stood there, some blanched at the sight of their almost nude leader, but they all stood there in shock for a moment before having to hold onto something or someone for support. They were laughing their asses off.
"Ara-aragorn... What in the name of Ulmo are you screeching about.... its a harmless..." Legolas could not find the strength to finish his sentence as he started to cry from laughter yet again. After laughing for a wee bit longer, the elf stood up and composed himself. "It was a harmless rabid fangirl my dear friend.... She wouldn't have hurt you in a million years. In fact shes rather cute." The girl was making obscene and perverted comments every few seconds. "Lets call her Pervita!" Aragorn was glowering at the elf. . Legolas had shooed the others away, he didnt want the Hobbits to lose their innocence, before bending down to his small package and retrieving a pair of scissors.
"Now that your first part of fun is over, lets go onto phase two." The sun glinted lethally off of the metal blades. "Now, dont get hasty on me Legolas..." The man pleaded pressing himself as tight as he could up against the tree. "How about a do it yourself vasectomy? I do imagine it would be fun... on my part." The blonde open and shut the scissors a few times smiling rather psychotically at them. "Snip snip snip." The scissors were lowered down to the level with Aragorns ahem.
Day 31
I cannot believe the nerve of that elf. Who the hell does he think he is? I still haven't gotten all of the honey off my chest... I almost lost precious again... he was going to cut it off with a pair of old scissors! but he did tie the rope down there so I guess my reactions were unfounded... But you should never joke about that! I read the last entry by the elf.. I cannot wait to see what he has in store for Gandalf... Legolas has become rather spiteful.... but hell as long as he stays away from me....
[the flowing script returned]
Be forewarned man, I am not done with you.
[the scrawl returned]
Damn.
Maybe not forever yours, but for now, Aragorn.
[A/N whoo its been a while, and I know i switched names throught the thing, but if you dont like it, screw u idk]