In the Eye of the Storm
Chapter 2: The Thousandth Burden
/
He woke up startled and scared. That memory of what he had done. It was all in his past but, it hurt. Spike could still feel the sword's grip or the taste of the slayer's blood. Seeing in those eyes the fear and . . . betrayal.
Those green eyes still looked at him and said 'why?' Why have you done this to me? The frail and delicate look, trying to seem so strong but, couldn't find the courage to do anything. It haunted him.
The vampire tightened his grip on a rock and clamped it long enough to break into thousands of grains. While clenching his teeth, Spike once again stood on his feet screaming out into the cave.
Spike wanted to let out all of his anger, and bitterness towards himself, out and what better way to do it then hit something he thought.
After slamming his fists into the cave walls a few times, Spike froze. He backed away several steps, until he tripped over a stone sticking out of the dirt floors. "Oh, God," trembling in his voice a he said it.
He looked at his hands. What he used them for when he hurt her. For when he touched her, ripped away at her.
He only wanted her, wanted to protect her when he couldn't even protect her from himself.
A tear appeared in his eye and rolled down his cheek. It was awful, he felt dirty.
Spike leaned his head against the wall, looking at the was out of the cave. Why should he got, he thought, having all this guilt and self- loathing made him thing if she disserved him, soul or not. He knew more than ever that he wanted forgiveness but, he also knew that he didn't disserve it, he didn't disserve a second chance, after all he was still a monster.
' Well William, why don't you just sleep on it.' The last thing he thought or daydreamed was Buffy, looking up at him, curled in his arms.
/
Chapter 2: The Thousandth Burden
/
He woke up startled and scared. That memory of what he had done. It was all in his past but, it hurt. Spike could still feel the sword's grip or the taste of the slayer's blood. Seeing in those eyes the fear and . . . betrayal.
Those green eyes still looked at him and said 'why?' Why have you done this to me? The frail and delicate look, trying to seem so strong but, couldn't find the courage to do anything. It haunted him.
The vampire tightened his grip on a rock and clamped it long enough to break into thousands of grains. While clenching his teeth, Spike once again stood on his feet screaming out into the cave.
Spike wanted to let out all of his anger, and bitterness towards himself, out and what better way to do it then hit something he thought.
After slamming his fists into the cave walls a few times, Spike froze. He backed away several steps, until he tripped over a stone sticking out of the dirt floors. "Oh, God," trembling in his voice a he said it.
He looked at his hands. What he used them for when he hurt her. For when he touched her, ripped away at her.
He only wanted her, wanted to protect her when he couldn't even protect her from himself.
A tear appeared in his eye and rolled down his cheek. It was awful, he felt dirty.
Spike leaned his head against the wall, looking at the was out of the cave. Why should he got, he thought, having all this guilt and self- loathing made him thing if she disserved him, soul or not. He knew more than ever that he wanted forgiveness but, he also knew that he didn't disserve it, he didn't disserve a second chance, after all he was still a monster.
' Well William, why don't you just sleep on it.' The last thing he thought or daydreamed was Buffy, looking up at him, curled in his arms.
/