"Good God, Zaphod! How many times do we have to explain it to you?"
The voice that was resonating through the halls of the Heart of Gold
sounded frustrated in a uniquely Ford Prefect-like way. In fact, it was
Ford Prefect, who was slumped in the corner in a position that looked
ridiculously comfortable. The man sitting in the position did not look
quite as comfortable. He looked, as his voice suggested, frustrated.
The other main participant in the argument looked quite a bit less frustrated and quite a bit more smug. "I understand the concept. What I can't grasp is the attraction. Humans really find it fun to sit in a circle and tap each other on the heads, yelling out names of birds and running around aimlessly?"
"It's Duck Duck Goose. It's a bloody children's game. You stop playing it when you turn seven." Ford found arguing with Zaphod exhausting. You might think the two heads would make it easier to get ideas across to him. You would be wrong. It just made it twice as difficult to pound ideas into his skull, or in his case, skulls. Ford couldn't even remember why it was so bloody important that Zaphod understood the 'attraction' of Duck Duck Goose anyhow. He looked for support from the other two people in the room, both of whom understood Duck Duck Goose better than he or Zaphod ever would.
Arthur was just opening his mouth to speak when he was very rudely interrupted.
A very loud cough was heard over the ship's loudspeaker.
Here is what the Encyclopedia Galactica has to say about coughing. It says that coughing is a pesky symptom to many viruses that carbon based life form can contract. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy pins it down as a useful tool for diversion if you're stuck in a sticky situation. It also notes, however, that it is a very easy way to get into a sticky situation if you're hiding and then give away your position by coughing.
This specific cough, the one heard by the crew of four in the Heart of Gold, was a perfect example of that last thing.
Each of the four people in the room glanced at the other three, waiting for someone to come clean. When no one did, Trillian spoke up. "Computer!"
Eddie immediately switched himself on. "Good morning!" his annoying voice exclaimed cheerfully. "What can I help you with this fine morning?"
"What was that noise?"
A bit of the computer's cheerfulness turned to nervousness, which made everyone extremely suspicious. "What noise? I didn't hear any noise."
Computers are bad liars.
"It was a sneeze," Trillian prompted, almost threatening.
"Oh, that noise!" Eddie burst out, trying desperately to think of something. "That was... erm... me! Sorry about that. Got a little dust in my circuits, is all. Alright now, though." He seemed satisfied with the answer he came up with.
Trillian glared at him for a moment, the looked to the others. "I say we split up and look for whatever sneezed." Eddie decided to turn himself off before Trillian found another reason to be mad at him.
Arthur couldn't say he really cared what sneezed. If it was dangerous, why go looking for it? He vaguely connected this last thought with bees. If you don't bother them, his mother used to say, they won't bother you. Even if this wasn't the case, and they were about to die, he would much rather spend his last moments not worrying about it. Although he didn't know it at the time, Zaphod shared this view, except, of course, for the part about the bees. Trillian's idea was probably the most practical; she wanted to prevent the danger. Ford was just curious.
Curiosity killed the cat is not a phrase that exists on Betelgeuse.
In fact, Ford was the first who found the source of the sneeze. He was wandering down one of the many winding hallways of the Heart of Gold, looking for some sort of clue, when he heard a sniffling coming from behind a door that led into a dark closet. "Well hello there," he mumbled to himself as he stopped, took a couple steps backward and opened the door, staring into the darkness.
A pair of watery eyes stared back at him.
"God bless you," he said.
The other main participant in the argument looked quite a bit less frustrated and quite a bit more smug. "I understand the concept. What I can't grasp is the attraction. Humans really find it fun to sit in a circle and tap each other on the heads, yelling out names of birds and running around aimlessly?"
"It's Duck Duck Goose. It's a bloody children's game. You stop playing it when you turn seven." Ford found arguing with Zaphod exhausting. You might think the two heads would make it easier to get ideas across to him. You would be wrong. It just made it twice as difficult to pound ideas into his skull, or in his case, skulls. Ford couldn't even remember why it was so bloody important that Zaphod understood the 'attraction' of Duck Duck Goose anyhow. He looked for support from the other two people in the room, both of whom understood Duck Duck Goose better than he or Zaphod ever would.
Arthur was just opening his mouth to speak when he was very rudely interrupted.
A very loud cough was heard over the ship's loudspeaker.
Here is what the Encyclopedia Galactica has to say about coughing. It says that coughing is a pesky symptom to many viruses that carbon based life form can contract. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy pins it down as a useful tool for diversion if you're stuck in a sticky situation. It also notes, however, that it is a very easy way to get into a sticky situation if you're hiding and then give away your position by coughing.
This specific cough, the one heard by the crew of four in the Heart of Gold, was a perfect example of that last thing.
Each of the four people in the room glanced at the other three, waiting for someone to come clean. When no one did, Trillian spoke up. "Computer!"
Eddie immediately switched himself on. "Good morning!" his annoying voice exclaimed cheerfully. "What can I help you with this fine morning?"
"What was that noise?"
A bit of the computer's cheerfulness turned to nervousness, which made everyone extremely suspicious. "What noise? I didn't hear any noise."
Computers are bad liars.
"It was a sneeze," Trillian prompted, almost threatening.
"Oh, that noise!" Eddie burst out, trying desperately to think of something. "That was... erm... me! Sorry about that. Got a little dust in my circuits, is all. Alright now, though." He seemed satisfied with the answer he came up with.
Trillian glared at him for a moment, the looked to the others. "I say we split up and look for whatever sneezed." Eddie decided to turn himself off before Trillian found another reason to be mad at him.
Arthur couldn't say he really cared what sneezed. If it was dangerous, why go looking for it? He vaguely connected this last thought with bees. If you don't bother them, his mother used to say, they won't bother you. Even if this wasn't the case, and they were about to die, he would much rather spend his last moments not worrying about it. Although he didn't know it at the time, Zaphod shared this view, except, of course, for the part about the bees. Trillian's idea was probably the most practical; she wanted to prevent the danger. Ford was just curious.
Curiosity killed the cat is not a phrase that exists on Betelgeuse.
In fact, Ford was the first who found the source of the sneeze. He was wandering down one of the many winding hallways of the Heart of Gold, looking for some sort of clue, when he heard a sniffling coming from behind a door that led into a dark closet. "Well hello there," he mumbled to himself as he stopped, took a couple steps backward and opened the door, staring into the darkness.
A pair of watery eyes stared back at him.
"God bless you," he said.