Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 11
Chapter 2: Familiar Kiss
Kitty Pryde entered the Danger Room control annex to overlook a training session taking place. Ororo Munro was suspended by the winds she could create from the thinnest of air. Bobby Drake was creating ice shields from the moisture in the air to avoid being hit by dangerous cannonballs as they soared through the air towards him. Kurt Wagner was teleporting to and fro between holographic enemies and Piotr Rasputin was ripping the head off an exceptionally large robot. The strength involved left Kitty wincing slightly.
"Kitty…" Logan – who was stationed at the control panel – stated without turning to see her, "What's up?"
"Nothin'," Kitty said, she took a seat beside him, "Just got back from that stupid counselling thing."
"How was it?" Logan asked casually.
"Oh, you know, he just asked stupid questions like 'how do you feel about that' and asked stupid questions. I'd have probably been better psychoanalysing myself."
"So what brings you down here?" Logan asked, changing the subject seeing that it was something she just didn't feel like talking about, the expression in her eyes became slightly misty.
"Just thought I'd see what everyone is up to," Kitty shrugged.
"When was the last time you worked out in here?" Logan asked gruffly, his eyes never leaving the X-Men training in the Danger Room. He scratched his stubbled chin absently, he pressed a few buttons on the console, and pushed the Danger Room session level lever up a little more so the level became more intense.
"I can't remember," Kitty sighed, "been so preoccupied…" she stared out beyond the glass longingly at Piotr, wishing she could just find it in herself to tell him how she felt. And he remained none the wiser. In her thoughts the word 'big stupid ox' came to mind.
Logan turned to glance at her with his steely eyes momentarily, "Better not keep skipping training, squirt, you'll lose technique and endurance if you don't practice every day, and you don't want to get too out of shape."
"God I know," Kitty said miserably, "I can already practically feel the flab growing over my body like an incurable cancer."
"You've never had flab," Logan chuckled, "you barely weigh ninety pounds."
"That's just because I'm a short ass," Kitty mumbled, "any way, the reason I haven't been working out lately is I'm so tired I'm scared I might jeopardize someone else's safety with my own carelessness, and that's not good."
Logan turned towards her fully, "What's eatin' at you…?"
Kitty looked away, "Nothin'," she lied.
Logan raised an eyebrow, he put his hand on her cheek and turned her head so she looked at him, "I know you too well to believe that bullshit 'nothin' comment for one minute," he said, his voice soft, but still like gravel. "What's wrong?"
Kitty sighed, "I don't know," She moved away from Logan's hand, "everything…" she shook her head, "I just…I can't get over this feeling of guilt every time I look at Rogue…you know, the question of 'what if it HAD been really Remy' I convinced to commit suicide with my own stupidity."
Logan sighed for a moment, "Kitty, you're not stupid. You're stressed, look at you, I can practically see it stretched upon that little face of yours," he clamped his hand on her shoulder and gave her a reassuring shake.
Kitty sniffled, "I should have listened to Hank…" she confessed, "he was right, I needed some time to adjust to my parents dying, this…"
"Look, you tried your best, at the end of the day you were only tryin' to help him. He had his own choice to throw a rope round his neck and take the leap, you didn't push him."
"I may has well have…" Kitty said sheepishly.
Logan shook his head, "no, that's not true. And anyway, if you hadn't done what you did, we'd all still be thinkin' he was the real Cajun. He even fooled me," Logan stated.
Kitty shrugged, "I guess," she stared out of the window and decided to rapidly change the subject, "has Piotr mentioned how long he's going to be staying here?" she asked in a careful nonchalant tone as she swept her brown hair away from her face.
"I don't think so," Logan responded, "I think what with this situation with the clone and all that Piotr is probably gonna stay a while longer, just in case something bad goes down."
"That's…nice of him," Kitty admitted.
"He's a good guy."
Kitty nodded, "Yeah…yeah, he is…he's great," she stood up, "Well, I guess I better go see to dinner, it's my turn to cook tonight."
"Oh great, just what I needed…bean sprouts and tofu," Logan made a face.
"Actually I'm making pasta tonight," Kitty swatted his head playfully, "have you seen Rogue anywhere?"
"Saw her earlier heading along to the war room to speak to Jean."
"I wanted to make sure she had gotten some sleep, she looks SO exhausted, I'm just afraid she'll crack under the strain of all this stuff," Kitty sighed.
"By the looks of it, she's not the only one," Logan pointed out, staring right at Kitty.
Kitty chose to ignore his statement, "I'll see you later."
Kitty left the Control Annex and headed along the corridor to where the War room entrance was located, she took a deep breath, and stepped in, finding Jean alone in there. Jean was sitting at the computer console and was going through a very long print out, every so often typing something into the computer, then going back to look at the print out.
"What you got there?" Kitty asked curiously, approaching.
"A list of every person who attended that conference in Washington…the one Hank attended."
"Oh, right," Kitty said, "Need help?"
"I'll manage somehow," Jean said, "right now I'm doing a search on every name in the list to find out if any of them are linked to scientific careers or careers in medicine, hopefully this might help us get a lead on who cloned Remy."
"Won't that take some time?" Kitty asked concernedly.
"Yes, but it's all we have to work on right now. I can't find any information about robberies that I can really link to Remy."
"Even if he had been involved in any robberies around the time he was traced by Piotr's cousin, Remy was that good at his work, he probably covered his tracks," Kitty admitted, then paused to add a thought, "But…y'know, he had gotten a little careless in the end, so who knows…"
Jean used a pink highlighter to score off a name on the list, "Only four hundred and fifty nine to go," she said to herself.
"Are you sure you don't want some help? I mean, I'm SUPPOSED to be making dinner, but I could always do what Kurt does when it's his turn to cook and call for pizza…" Kitty suggested. "I don't think anyone will mind…"
Jean smiled, "no, its fine, and speaking of Kurt, he's coming along in a while to give me a hand with this – after his Danger Room training session."
Kitty nodded, "Alright…well, anyway, I better go get dinner made…" she touched Jean's shoulder, "I'll see you at dinner."
"Alright," Jean responded with a curt nod.
As Kitty left the room, she found herself wondering why her own life had begun to go badly downhill. Kitty pondered if this was maybe because she'd gotten careless, or too comfortable living at the mansion. Forgotten what really counted – her family. Now the only family she had were the ones she had no interest in being around, the ones who thought of her as an outsider because of her powers. She felt truly alone now, and no matter how close she was to the X-Men and no matter how much she felt they were just another family to her, she still felt detached.
She'd just climbed into the elevator when she heard Kurt calling out for her.
"Kitty, hold the elevator!"
Kitty pressed her hand against the door button to hold it open and waited patiently, a moment later, Kurt appeared, his hair and fur slightly damp with sweat, his breathing was hard.
"Good work out?" she asked, she pushed the button and the elevator began to slowly ascend up to the first floor of the mansion.
"Like you wouldn't believe," Kurt responded, he leaned against the wall of the elevator, "where've you been? I've been looking for you all day…"
"Professor Xavier made me go to a private counsellor in the City," Kitty responded, "I only got back about an hour ago," she responded.
"How did that go?" Kurt asked, he had a small white towel around his neck, he removed it and began to dab at his damp face with it.
"Oh, you know, stupid questions that don't have any relevance, and all the rest. Professor Xavier wants me to go back…"
"Maybe you should…" Kurt looked at her with his silvery eyes.
Kitty put her hands to her face and sighed into them, "I just want all of this stuff to end. I don't want to have to relive every detail with a stranger."
Kurt brushed his fingers against Kitty's hair, "are you alright?"
"If I was would the Professor insist on me seeing a counsellor?" she asked.
Kurt moved over and slipped his arms around her, and despite his sweat-tinged fur and uniform, Kitty didn't even mind. "It'll get better," he promised, "it just has to get worse before it gets better."
"I guess," Kitty rested her head against his shoulder, she gripped onto his arms, just glad of the embrace, she sighed sadly, and held on a little tighter.
The elevator doors slid open, and Kitty moved back hearing this, she stared at Kurt for a moment, his expression was unreadable for a few seconds, and then all too familiar. She knew what was coming – something that she'd experienced what seemed like a thousand times – but she didn't have enough chance to respond or avoid the kiss that came. His kiss was just as familiar as it had always been, and his embrace just as tender. For a moment she was almost enveloped in it, seduced by the familiar and comforting sensations, but quickly reminded herself this wasn't appropriate, especially out in the hall, and especially when she just didn't feel that way about Kurt anymore.
"I can't…" she pulled away slowly, she pushed her hands softly against her chest, "I…I gotta go…gotta make dinner," she said, and took off towards the kitchen without another word.