Authors' Note: Here is my fourth chapter. Thank you so much for all the reviews I have received so far. I can not tell you how much they have encouraged me to continue this story. Thanks! I hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Tolkien's work.
Chapter 4 Memories
I awoke the next morning to find Haldir gone. He had not even waited to kiss me goodbye. I lay in bed a long time that morning, the day was beautiful much like the night had been, but I had not the strength to get up. Something was missing inside me, some void that needed to be filled. I closed my eyes and listened to the steady beating of my heart. It had always skipped a beat when he was near, but now it was shallow and rhythmic with no sense of purpose to it. What was going on? This question played itself through my mind like notes of music once had. I did not trust that Lintelin. Something about her frightened me down to the very core of my being. I wished that Haldir was with me now, I longed for his soft presence. But judging from the position of the sun, he was probably a long time at his post already. Then for the first time in nearly a hundred years, I began to feel lonely and remorseful. Why had I quit my job at the border? I had been with him then. Now my life revolved around cooking and housekeeping! Oh what had become of me! After another hour of lying in bed, I managed to gather what little energy I had and fix myself some breakfast. The food tasted like ash in my mouth. The bread was tough and the fruit near rotten. But upon inspecting my meal, I realized that it was not the food that had gone bad, but my own taste. I then stood and tried to sweep the flet's floor. A fine layer of dust had collected on it and Haldir's many muddy boot prints seemed to pace to and fro. The mud was dry, he had left very early. My back began to ache, so I straightened and rested my broom in its proper place. As I was returning to the main room of our house, I happened to catch a glimpse of myself in one of the mirrors. Dust had also collected on its surface as well and made my image look distorted. Why had the Valar not graced me with beauty like all other elf maidens? They seemed to almost taunt me the other day when I had met Lintelin. I sighed; dwelling on the matter would not help. My Naneth had always said that if one is not happy, then one must make oneself happy. But what would make me happy? The answer to my query was almost instantaneous. Haldir, that's what made me happy. He still might be in the city training that elleth. I could take a chance and bring him lunch. It would be an excuse just to see him. I brought out one of my straw baskets that was in the depths of the closet and filled it with last night's leftovers. Then, with one last look around our messy, yet cozy home, I made my way out the door.
The day was indeed a gorgeous one. Summer had just started and the forest seemed to be overflowing with its native flowers. A gentle breeze played across my pale cheeks and tugged at my hair. I shifted the basket on my arm, being careful as not to spill the contents of it. I was heading to a small glade where most of the guard practiced archery and fencing. It was a very special place to me, for it was where Haldir and I had first kissed. And even though I had not set foot in it for many a year, it still held a significant place in my heart. I remembered that night better than any other in my life and it was always a pleasant thought. I let my mind stray to that comforting place and recalled with great clarity what had happened.
/Flashback/
"Here, move your hands up to grip the sword more firmly. If you don't have a tight grip upon your weapon, it can be easy for an enemy to disarm you."
"Yes, March Warden," I did as I was instructed, trying to tighten my hold on the sword, my hands slipping upon its polished surface due to the sweat that had collected on my palms.
"Now, I am going to try and disarm you again. Remember what I taught you, stand your ground, don't be frightened."
"Yes, March Warden," I swallowed the fear that had risen up in my throat. Haldir stepped away from me. His blond hair was cast haphazardly over his shoulders and a few beads of sweat rested upon his upper lip. It was a humid summer evening and the commander had stayed late into the night, trying to prepare me for duty on the borders. I had joined the guard several weeks ago and my fencing skills left plenty of room for improvement. I was nervous, a feeling of tension washed over me like a tidal wave. I did not want the captain to lose his patience with me. I was honestly trying my best, but sometimes when he fought aggressively, I panicked and dropped my sword. Part of me wondered why he even bothered. He could just as easily find someone much better trained. But I was forced to push these thoughts from my mind as Haldir took his position opposite me and raised his sword, ready for combat. In a few seconds our blades connected. I fought long and hard, pushing him back, but my feeble parries were no match for his expert blows. The starlight was glowing off our swords and it gave an eerie appearance to the whole glade as we danced around each other in fluid movements. Yet finally my blade was knocked from my hand. It fell to the mossy ground with a soft thud. If it had been daytime, the flush that had risen on my face would be clearly noticeable. But thank Eru it was night. I turned my head away and clenched my eyes shut as I heard him sigh quietly. I did not want to disappoint him; I only wanted him to be pleased with me. A few tears began to form under my eyelids and I let my breath come out in spurts.
"Good," I heard him say to me, my eyes flew open. "You did much better this time." He too, was breathing heavy and he wiped his brow upon his sleeve. "Pick up your sword and we will try again. A few more times and I think you will have improved greatly." I nodded and moved to pick up my fallen blade, which glittered in the beautiful celestial light. But as I bent down I felt a wave of dizziness come over me. The heat had exhausted both my body and mind. I swayed and almost fell when he caught me.
"Careful," his voice was gentle as I was cradled in his strong arms. "You need rest, I am sorry if I have been too hard on you." I would have answered but my voice caught in my throat. The stars were reflected in his eyes and his pale skin glowed. I felt overwhelmed by his handsome face. And then to my great surprise, I saw him coming closer to me. His lips were upon mine and I felt all the love and care that I had longed for over the years in him. I closed my eyes and let him kiss me.
/End Flashback/
I was quickly brought out of my reverie by someone calling to me. There stood my husband a smile upon his lips and Lintelin by his side.
Elleth: female elf
Naneth: Mother