Authors' Note: Here is my fifth chapter. I cannot thank you all enough for the reviews. I really appreciate them. To answer Moonbunny77's question about how it didn't seem that Haldir was cheating on her, I can't say too much, but I will tell you this. As the plot thickens and develops you will see more into this. Also, he may not have been cheating on her then, but he still could. *smiles mysteriously* I hope that cleared it up for you, if not I would be happy to answer any more of your questions. I also know that the chapters are short and I will try my best to lengthen them in the future. Thanks! I hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Tolkien's work.
Chapter 5 Tears
I felt the basket fall from the crook in my arm. Haldir was standing before me, waving and smiling. Yet there she stood with an arrogant smirk upon her rosy lips. In her hand she held my short knife. It dangled from her thin fingers and she seemed to almost taunt me with it as she made practice stabs. My hands began to tremble, why I did not know. But then Haldir came to stand beside me, he stooped and picked up my fallen basket.
"Elenwen," he bent to peck my on the cheek. "Why have you come here meleth nin? Is something amiss at home?"
"No," I noticed that my voice held much contempt in it. I reached my arms up and threw them around his neck. Then, I planted a kiss firmly upon his full lips; it covered up the awkward moment nicely even if it was improper to do such in public
"I missed you this morning," I kept my voice low so that only he could hear. "And you came home so late last night; I barely had the chance to kiss you."
"Oh is that all," he looked surprised.
"Well, I also brought you lunch," I pointed to the basket that he now held, "the leftovers from last night, since you had no dinner."
"Lintelin and I ate a small dinner whilst training," he peeked under the cloth that covered the food. "But we are quite hungry now. I have been practicing fencing with her since early this morn."
"You had dinner together last night?" my voice sounded small and far away in my ears.
"I don't know if you could call it dinner, it was just a few pieces of bread with some cheese and water."
"But I cooked for you," confusion filled me. I did not understand why he would not come home to eat with me. "I was all alone last night."
"I told you how sorry I was about that," he put a strong, callused hand upon my shoulder. "Tonight will be better, I promise. I shall spend all evening with you." He then leaned down and playfully blew in my ear, he knew I was ticklish. I laughed and pushed him away, my husband could always charm me. "Now come," he moved over to a bench made of a fallen log in the corner where Lintelin sat, "we shall eat, for I know that we are both famished." I thought he was addressing me, so I moved to join them. But then she dipped her hand into my basket and removed a loaf of bread. They began to eat, laughing and talking. Haldir didn't even seem to notice that I was still standing there. He was so close to me, yet so far away. I actually reached out my hand, longing to touch him. But then I drew back and curled my fingers near my lips. I felt tears forming in the corners of my eyes. I could not stay here.
"Namaarie my dear," I said. "I must depart."
"Oh namaarie, Elenwen," he did not look up. I turned and began to leave when she called me back.
"Wait!" Lintelin said. She moved over to me and handed back the short knife. "You may have this back. I am finished with it." The blade was cold and smooth in my hand. I clasped tightly to it, my knuckles turning white. My being whipped around and I fled from the glade.
My body was like a windswept leaf, moving through the forest at ease and out of sight, or at least I hoped out of sight. Our flet loomed above me in a matter of minutes and I threw open the door to run and collapse upon our bed. Tears sprang from my eyes and I sobbed. The sounds were muffled and I felt the bedspread grow increasingly wet. My mouth tasted of salt and I swallowed the bitter liquid and felt it slid down my throat.
"Haldir, Haldir," I murmured his name over and over again. I did not know for how long I cried, but when I finally looked up the sun was descending into the west. My face was clammy and my eyes red from the tears that had spilled from them. It was only now that I looked down at the short knife that was still clutched in my hand. Along the handle ran a scratch, the polished surface was no longer smooth.
"Daughter of an orc," I whispered as I inspected the weapon, my voice was hoarse from crying. "She did it on purpose." I drew my knees up to my chest, I should be preparing dinner, but now, I didn't feel like it. I thought back to all the times Haldir had professed his love for me. He had made me feel special and loved, in a world where I was all alone. Many times I had asked him if he would leave me. It was not that I thought he would, but I merely asked out of my own insecurity and giddiness in the moment. But the answer had always been known, before I had inquired. He would laugh and pull me closer, as I tucked my head under his chin.
"No meleth nin," he would respond. "I will never leave you. Never shall I part from your side." That had secured me, filled me with a warmth and glow that I never felt when alone. Yet now, I was not sure of the answer. I asked the question to the empty flet. Even though Haldir was not here, that seemed like a sufficient enough answer in itself. I sighed, feeling my heart slow in rhythm, I wanted him with me. I did not want him near or with anyone else. Yes, I suppose I was jealous, but it was not very often that I felt threatened in this way. This brought on a new wave of fresh tears, which I tried to stifle unsuccessfully. The door to our flet was opening, someone was coming in. I looked up and let my eyes meet with his.
Meleth nin: My love
Namaarie: Farewell