Nail in my hand from my creator.
To the brink of my sanity
I don't own final fantasy 8... why do I even bother putting that. It's pretty obvious that I don't!
First I though I better thank my reviewers. I haven't had any bad reviews yet (this isn't an invitation to send one) and it's quite humbling.
Once again, Rinoa came home to find her father and her fiancé sitting at the table.
"Rinoa, thank God your home." John exclaimed.
Rinoa thought this was a trap and started to plan her escape route.
"John and I have entered negotiations about children." Caraway continued.
Rinoa gave then a confused look and replied,
"Please forgive my ignorance Father, but negotiations?"
John stood up at her comment. He walked towards her and gave her a vice like hug. Usually such shows of affection were strictly prohibited, but her father didn't seem to mind at all.
John Pastor was a towering 6"8 and about thirty years older than Rinoa. He had slightly graying hair and a firm very distinctive chin. His hands were worn from years of hard labor. He always smelt like stale beer which Rinoa hated. To be so old and not married was unusual for a man or woman, but his wife had died about two months ago and since then he'd been on the prowl for a new one. Polygamy wasn't uncommon in their sect but this particular man only had one wife. Rinoa's father had two. But there were men in the sect that had at least five.
John lifted Rinoa's face up to look at his, much like Squall had when they first met.
"So innocent..." John whispered softly.
Now it was Rinoa's fathers turn to stand.
"Rinoa, after you marriage with John you will be expected to have one child a year for the first ten years, any additional children after that are the blessing of God. If this is not completed then John is able to get a full refund." Caraway explained.
Rinoa broke away from John and gave her father a tearful look.
"Refund?"
"Yes, he may give you back."
Rinoa's world seemed to spin, she didn't understand. All of a sudden this whole marriage thing seemed so real. She was only sixteen years old, she wasn't ready for this. She felt a scream at the back of her throat but dared not let it out.
"Well..." Rinoa choked back a couple of tears, "then it is decided."
"Oh Rinoa, you have no idea of the happiness that you shall be in when you are my wife."
Caraway crossed the floor over to his daughter; he smiled at her and then said,
"John, would you inform the town that there will be a meeting in the hall tonight. I expect everyone to be there, it is very important. The only excuse for not being there is if the woman is giving birth or is unfit for male interaction."
By unfit he meant they had their period. At this point of the month the female was not to be in male presence because she was considered unclean.
Rinoa sat down on her bed in a state of shock. She looked out her window and sighed.
'So this is my life...' Rinoa thought.
At no point did she actually cry. What would crying do? How would crying help? She couldn't get out of this...
Squall pulled up at his house in an unusually good mood. He walked in the door twirling the keys around his index finger.
"Somebody had a good day." Laguna said from the kitchen table.
Squall bit his bottom lip and thought about the statement.
"No not really. I actually had a pretty shitty day. Yours?"
"Perfect!" Laguna exclaimed, "The parks ganna be open for business in about a week."
"Wow, that's wonderful." Squall said absent mindedly as he grabbed a yogurt from the fridge.
Squall walked up to his room and lay on his bed. His head was riddled with unanswered thoughts and questions.
'What the hell happened today? Yesterday she as all cool and shit and now she's a completely different person...'
Rinoa on the other hand had a completely different subject on her mind.
'I wonder if what happened between me and Squall yesterday would be considered adultery... if so then I need punishment for my sins. Maybe I should tell Father... I really am Satan's slut...'
That night... the meeting Caraway mentioned.
All the members were congregated in the large dome shaped building. They all settled themselves down in family groups. The groups were in rank. Caraway's family as well as two other families filled the first row and so on and so forth.
"My children..." Caraway started, he always started his speeches like this, it was because he was considered a profit of god, "... I bring you news that I'm sure you have been waiting for as I have. God has a plan for us, never doubt that and he wants us to leave this sin city and start fresh. We are going to depart and find our own home. I will lead you out of this sin and into the goodness. In this place we will have our own rules, our own freedom and will not be ridiculed because we have faith. Your children will have their own school, not have to go to that heathen public school. We will depart tomorrow; take only what you need for God will provide the rest..."
Each word hit Rinoa like a punch in the mouth. She was leaving, but she was just starting to like this place. She didn't want to leave, she wanted to stay... but if they were to stay would anything be any different? She would have to marry John just the same; at least in this new place she wouldn't have to deal with the students at that school... she wouldn't have to deal with Squall...
"Now, as a celebration I issue an open congregation of the neighborhood. Just our part of it of course. But I will expect that you all return to your houses by nine o clock. Remember the early bird catches the worm."
There was a loud wave of applause and Caraway put the palms of his hands together in front of him and bowed.
The hall filtered out and all the people were out on the streets. It was like a festival or something, except without rides and game booths or anything else that could be considered fun.
Rinoa walked down the crowded street alone, she looked around the neighborhood that she called home. But it wasn't her home. She didn't like this place. In fact she hated it. This place that had restricted her from a normal life and made her ostracized from the rest of humanity.
Rinoa got sick of watching everyone pretend that they were happy and decided to go home instead. In there she found her 'other mother' and smiled at her curtly. She was never the biggest fan of that woman.
As per usual she went straight to her barren room.
'I need to tell them... they at least to deserve to know that I'm leaving. But they'll try to stop me... I can't look them in the eye... I'll write them a note...' Rinoa thought. She pulled out a blank piece of paper and began to write.
The next day... Friday...
As per usual Squall walked towards his locker, where he would meet the rest of his comrades. When he got there he saw Quistis and Irvine were already there.
"Ow, Squally's got a love letter on his locker." Irvine chuckled.
"No doubt another desperate female seeking his company." Quistis added.
Squall rolled his eyes and ignored the note. He opened his locker and grabbed his desired books.
"Well aren't you going to read it?" Quistis asked.
Squall gave her a why-the-hell-should-I look.
"Oh c'mon man! The last one had a picture in it!" Irvine exclaimed.
Squall grabbed the letter and carelessly ripped it open. His face went from bored, to confused to angry.
"Well whats it say?" Irvine enquired.
"Is it another one threatening to kill your family if you don't go on a date with her?"
"Y'know I had a couple of love letters on my locker for a time, then Selphie found out who was writing them and they abruptly stopped. She called it the Seifer technique." Irvine rambled.
Squall slowly handed the letter to Quistis. She reached into her bag and pulled out her glasses so that she could read it...
"Squall.
As you read this my family, my neighbors and my church travel through the barren hills north of you to find our own town. I felt that I should at least say goodbye, even if it is in letter form. Please understand. I haven't known you for very long but I think that you'll be angry.
Please tell everyone that I thank them so much for dressing me up and giving me one day of normality. I will treasure it forever and even when life has broken me it will be a shining star in an otherwise cloudy night.
This isn't goodbye its just goodnight, for we will see each other again. Even if my people believe that outsiders go to hell, I can't bear to think of a heaven without you people in it. If I could choose my heaven, it would be our day... I wish I could have it forever.
Thinking of you always... Rinoa."
"SHE WHAT!" Seifer yelled earning the attention of the entire student faculty.
"Well Seifer I'd think it'd be quite obvious by now. She left to go live in the mountains." Quistis said trying to add some humor to the otherwise bleak conversation.
Seifer started stuttering for a second or two before he continued. "Why! When! How!"
"Cause she had to, some time between last night and this morning and probably by donkey." Zell laughed.
"Donkey?" Irvine enquired.
"Who cares how she got there. But I'm ganna go find her and your all going to help me." Squall interrupted.
They all looked at him in disbelief. The hills north of them were covering in snow and ice. Not nice walking conditions, but excellent tracking conditions.
"Dude, you sure you haven't like gone mentally deranged in the last couple of days. You want us to go after some chick you met like three days ago and help you find her? In the mountains." Irvine said blandly.
"C'mon guys where's your go go spirit?" Selphie exclaimed.
"Sorry I left mine with my dog." Seifer replied.
"Actually I agree with Irvine. This is ludicrous. How in the hell do you expect to find her anyway? She could be on a plane traveling for all we know." Quistis interjected.
"Yeah, just shove her in you spank bank and move on." Irvine agreed.
Selphie stood up from her sitting position and put her hands on her hips. She grabbed Squall's arm and hoisted him up as well and started walking towards the school gates.
"Fine, if none of you will help me, then me and Squall will do it alone." Selphie called out over her shoulder.
"Uhhh Selphie are you sure about this. There could be wolves." Squall whispered.
Selphie 'accidentally' stood on his left foot forcefully and continued walking.
They all sat there in stunned silence. Till finally Irvine started. "Y'know I don't really like the idea of Selphie going out in the fucking mountains. There could be wolves."
"Well I'm going to go join them." Quistis said before she ran off behind them.
Seifer bit his bottom lip and sat there for a second. "Fuck it."
Irvine glanced at Zell, who had been pretty silent throughout this entire conversation. Zell looked back in a defeatist glance.
"C'mon cowboy." Zell muttered.
And he too followed.
"I knew you'd come Irvy." Selphie squealed enthusiastically as he turned the corner where they all stood waiting.
"Right... the first objective of this mission is to go home and retrieve the warmest clothes you own. Mini skirts and tank tops aren't warm..." Quistis halted in her orders to stare at Selphie, "... then I will pay a visit to a close friend of mine. She might be able to give me some information on Rinoa's sudden disappearance. We will all congregate at Squall's house in two hours."
"Cant wait." Selphie yelled.
"Woopdedoo." Zell said unenthusiastically.
Meanwhile...
Rinoa took one last look at the city before it was cut off from her sight. She was resting at the moment, hitching a ride on her neighbor's wagon. She let out a sad sigh and looked towards the sky of guidance. She wanted someone to give her a sign that she was doing the right thing. When her entire inner being screamed at her that this was wrong.
It's cool if you review. It's cool if you don't...
To the brink of my sanity
I don't own final fantasy 8... why do I even bother putting that. It's pretty obvious that I don't!
First I though I better thank my reviewers. I haven't had any bad reviews yet (this isn't an invitation to send one) and it's quite humbling.
Once again, Rinoa came home to find her father and her fiancé sitting at the table.
"Rinoa, thank God your home." John exclaimed.
Rinoa thought this was a trap and started to plan her escape route.
"John and I have entered negotiations about children." Caraway continued.
Rinoa gave then a confused look and replied,
"Please forgive my ignorance Father, but negotiations?"
John stood up at her comment. He walked towards her and gave her a vice like hug. Usually such shows of affection were strictly prohibited, but her father didn't seem to mind at all.
John Pastor was a towering 6"8 and about thirty years older than Rinoa. He had slightly graying hair and a firm very distinctive chin. His hands were worn from years of hard labor. He always smelt like stale beer which Rinoa hated. To be so old and not married was unusual for a man or woman, but his wife had died about two months ago and since then he'd been on the prowl for a new one. Polygamy wasn't uncommon in their sect but this particular man only had one wife. Rinoa's father had two. But there were men in the sect that had at least five.
John lifted Rinoa's face up to look at his, much like Squall had when they first met.
"So innocent..." John whispered softly.
Now it was Rinoa's fathers turn to stand.
"Rinoa, after you marriage with John you will be expected to have one child a year for the first ten years, any additional children after that are the blessing of God. If this is not completed then John is able to get a full refund." Caraway explained.
Rinoa broke away from John and gave her father a tearful look.
"Refund?"
"Yes, he may give you back."
Rinoa's world seemed to spin, she didn't understand. All of a sudden this whole marriage thing seemed so real. She was only sixteen years old, she wasn't ready for this. She felt a scream at the back of her throat but dared not let it out.
"Well..." Rinoa choked back a couple of tears, "then it is decided."
"Oh Rinoa, you have no idea of the happiness that you shall be in when you are my wife."
Caraway crossed the floor over to his daughter; he smiled at her and then said,
"John, would you inform the town that there will be a meeting in the hall tonight. I expect everyone to be there, it is very important. The only excuse for not being there is if the woman is giving birth or is unfit for male interaction."
By unfit he meant they had their period. At this point of the month the female was not to be in male presence because she was considered unclean.
Rinoa sat down on her bed in a state of shock. She looked out her window and sighed.
'So this is my life...' Rinoa thought.
At no point did she actually cry. What would crying do? How would crying help? She couldn't get out of this...
Squall pulled up at his house in an unusually good mood. He walked in the door twirling the keys around his index finger.
"Somebody had a good day." Laguna said from the kitchen table.
Squall bit his bottom lip and thought about the statement.
"No not really. I actually had a pretty shitty day. Yours?"
"Perfect!" Laguna exclaimed, "The parks ganna be open for business in about a week."
"Wow, that's wonderful." Squall said absent mindedly as he grabbed a yogurt from the fridge.
Squall walked up to his room and lay on his bed. His head was riddled with unanswered thoughts and questions.
'What the hell happened today? Yesterday she as all cool and shit and now she's a completely different person...'
Rinoa on the other hand had a completely different subject on her mind.
'I wonder if what happened between me and Squall yesterday would be considered adultery... if so then I need punishment for my sins. Maybe I should tell Father... I really am Satan's slut...'
That night... the meeting Caraway mentioned.
All the members were congregated in the large dome shaped building. They all settled themselves down in family groups. The groups were in rank. Caraway's family as well as two other families filled the first row and so on and so forth.
"My children..." Caraway started, he always started his speeches like this, it was because he was considered a profit of god, "... I bring you news that I'm sure you have been waiting for as I have. God has a plan for us, never doubt that and he wants us to leave this sin city and start fresh. We are going to depart and find our own home. I will lead you out of this sin and into the goodness. In this place we will have our own rules, our own freedom and will not be ridiculed because we have faith. Your children will have their own school, not have to go to that heathen public school. We will depart tomorrow; take only what you need for God will provide the rest..."
Each word hit Rinoa like a punch in the mouth. She was leaving, but she was just starting to like this place. She didn't want to leave, she wanted to stay... but if they were to stay would anything be any different? She would have to marry John just the same; at least in this new place she wouldn't have to deal with the students at that school... she wouldn't have to deal with Squall...
"Now, as a celebration I issue an open congregation of the neighborhood. Just our part of it of course. But I will expect that you all return to your houses by nine o clock. Remember the early bird catches the worm."
There was a loud wave of applause and Caraway put the palms of his hands together in front of him and bowed.
The hall filtered out and all the people were out on the streets. It was like a festival or something, except without rides and game booths or anything else that could be considered fun.
Rinoa walked down the crowded street alone, she looked around the neighborhood that she called home. But it wasn't her home. She didn't like this place. In fact she hated it. This place that had restricted her from a normal life and made her ostracized from the rest of humanity.
Rinoa got sick of watching everyone pretend that they were happy and decided to go home instead. In there she found her 'other mother' and smiled at her curtly. She was never the biggest fan of that woman.
As per usual she went straight to her barren room.
'I need to tell them... they at least to deserve to know that I'm leaving. But they'll try to stop me... I can't look them in the eye... I'll write them a note...' Rinoa thought. She pulled out a blank piece of paper and began to write.
The next day... Friday...
As per usual Squall walked towards his locker, where he would meet the rest of his comrades. When he got there he saw Quistis and Irvine were already there.
"Ow, Squally's got a love letter on his locker." Irvine chuckled.
"No doubt another desperate female seeking his company." Quistis added.
Squall rolled his eyes and ignored the note. He opened his locker and grabbed his desired books.
"Well aren't you going to read it?" Quistis asked.
Squall gave her a why-the-hell-should-I look.
"Oh c'mon man! The last one had a picture in it!" Irvine exclaimed.
Squall grabbed the letter and carelessly ripped it open. His face went from bored, to confused to angry.
"Well whats it say?" Irvine enquired.
"Is it another one threatening to kill your family if you don't go on a date with her?"
"Y'know I had a couple of love letters on my locker for a time, then Selphie found out who was writing them and they abruptly stopped. She called it the Seifer technique." Irvine rambled.
Squall slowly handed the letter to Quistis. She reached into her bag and pulled out her glasses so that she could read it...
"Squall.
As you read this my family, my neighbors and my church travel through the barren hills north of you to find our own town. I felt that I should at least say goodbye, even if it is in letter form. Please understand. I haven't known you for very long but I think that you'll be angry.
Please tell everyone that I thank them so much for dressing me up and giving me one day of normality. I will treasure it forever and even when life has broken me it will be a shining star in an otherwise cloudy night.
This isn't goodbye its just goodnight, for we will see each other again. Even if my people believe that outsiders go to hell, I can't bear to think of a heaven without you people in it. If I could choose my heaven, it would be our day... I wish I could have it forever.
Thinking of you always... Rinoa."
"SHE WHAT!" Seifer yelled earning the attention of the entire student faculty.
"Well Seifer I'd think it'd be quite obvious by now. She left to go live in the mountains." Quistis said trying to add some humor to the otherwise bleak conversation.
Seifer started stuttering for a second or two before he continued. "Why! When! How!"
"Cause she had to, some time between last night and this morning and probably by donkey." Zell laughed.
"Donkey?" Irvine enquired.
"Who cares how she got there. But I'm ganna go find her and your all going to help me." Squall interrupted.
They all looked at him in disbelief. The hills north of them were covering in snow and ice. Not nice walking conditions, but excellent tracking conditions.
"Dude, you sure you haven't like gone mentally deranged in the last couple of days. You want us to go after some chick you met like three days ago and help you find her? In the mountains." Irvine said blandly.
"C'mon guys where's your go go spirit?" Selphie exclaimed.
"Sorry I left mine with my dog." Seifer replied.
"Actually I agree with Irvine. This is ludicrous. How in the hell do you expect to find her anyway? She could be on a plane traveling for all we know." Quistis interjected.
"Yeah, just shove her in you spank bank and move on." Irvine agreed.
Selphie stood up from her sitting position and put her hands on her hips. She grabbed Squall's arm and hoisted him up as well and started walking towards the school gates.
"Fine, if none of you will help me, then me and Squall will do it alone." Selphie called out over her shoulder.
"Uhhh Selphie are you sure about this. There could be wolves." Squall whispered.
Selphie 'accidentally' stood on his left foot forcefully and continued walking.
They all sat there in stunned silence. Till finally Irvine started. "Y'know I don't really like the idea of Selphie going out in the fucking mountains. There could be wolves."
"Well I'm going to go join them." Quistis said before she ran off behind them.
Seifer bit his bottom lip and sat there for a second. "Fuck it."
Irvine glanced at Zell, who had been pretty silent throughout this entire conversation. Zell looked back in a defeatist glance.
"C'mon cowboy." Zell muttered.
And he too followed.
"I knew you'd come Irvy." Selphie squealed enthusiastically as he turned the corner where they all stood waiting.
"Right... the first objective of this mission is to go home and retrieve the warmest clothes you own. Mini skirts and tank tops aren't warm..." Quistis halted in her orders to stare at Selphie, "... then I will pay a visit to a close friend of mine. She might be able to give me some information on Rinoa's sudden disappearance. We will all congregate at Squall's house in two hours."
"Cant wait." Selphie yelled.
"Woopdedoo." Zell said unenthusiastically.
Meanwhile...
Rinoa took one last look at the city before it was cut off from her sight. She was resting at the moment, hitching a ride on her neighbor's wagon. She let out a sad sigh and looked towards the sky of guidance. She wanted someone to give her a sign that she was doing the right thing. When her entire inner being screamed at her that this was wrong.
It's cool if you review. It's cool if you don't...