Episode 04: Soon to be... Daddy?

My tears flowed heavily, my heart broke in thousands of pieces. Anger grew deep and heavy in my heart.

"I'm sorry you ever even had that kind of thought enter your mind."

What? What is he saying? I paused for a few moments trying to gather my thoughts into something that made sense... he's sorry that thought entered my mind? What did he mean by that? Slowly my sobbing began to ease up as he tilted my head to look at him.

"Bra." I shut my eyes as he wiped my tears away.

"What're you...s-saying Goten?"

"I feel sorry for you."

"Excuse me?" My face showed anger toward him. Feel sorry for me? What-why?

"We've been together for almost two years and to this day you still don't trust me."

"Huh?"

"Honey, if you trusted me well enough, you wouldn't have had that kind of thought enter your mind."

"So, so she's not... pregnant?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Well of cour--"

"Then there's no need for me to answer that. You should already know it yourself."

I shut my eyes and dug my head into his chest and held him tight.

"Then why did you have to meet her at the hospital?"

"She's been sick lately and her parents were out on a trip so I was the only person she could turn to for comfort."

"So, why didn't you tell me?"

"I was in a rush and I wasn't thinking straight."

"How long has this been going on?"

"Almost a week now."

I sighed, my face showed bitterness that he had been spending time with her without consulting me. In disapproval, I turned my face away from him.

"You talk about trust when it's been going on for a week and you never once mentioned it to me."

"If I did, would you approve?"

"No, but --"

"That's my point."

"Would you say yes if I were to ask you if I could visit my ex-boyfriend who you saw me have sex with before?"

"Can we not bring that up?"

"How can I NOT? I had front row seats Goten."

"But you ALWAYS use it in defense. Can't you let it go?"

"You mean let you go is more like it... that way you can be with her..."

"Bra, hun. If I wanted to be with her then I would just go ahead and begin dating her again."

"So why don't you? She's a model. Who wouldn't want to be with a model?"

"So she's a model, so what? She's not the one I want to be with. She's not the one who makes me feel like you do." I turned around and began walking away a couple feet

"So why haven't you told me you've been seeing her lately?"

"I thought you wouldn't approve and I know this is bad but I'm all she has right now. She's sick and no one's there to take care of her or see her while she lays there."

"Why not her managers or something?"

"She's on vacation right now as is her managers and guards."

"..."

"..."

"...but why you..."

I heard him stepping toward me. Soon he stood in front of me. He tilted my head upward and leaned in for a long steady kiss...

"Does it matter? I'm YOUR boyfriend, not hers."

"Her ex."

"So it's the past. You're my present and future."

"Ok, I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted, besides I'd probably ask the same things if I were you."

"...yeah."

"Now can we try not to argue again tonight?"

"... that's kind of been happening a lot lately hasn't it?" he nodded his head in response as he continued to hold me in his arms while i stared into his dark eyes.

Bra, "I'm just scared of losing you."

"How can you say that?"

"I've never been with someone for this long as well as being in love. It's like as soon as I think I know you so well the next time I see you I've learned something new."

"You know, I'm scared too..."

"Yeah?"

"I haven't been with someone as long as I've been with you."

"But what about Paris? Didn't you fall in love with her?"

"Sure I've been in love but this is different. I'm scared of you honey."

"Me?"

"Yeah, I'm afraid that one day I won't be able to fight for you."

"?"

"I still think about 2 years ago, and the thought of almost losing you like that... I still remember how that felt, every word you said and how you said it. It scared me. I thought I'd lost you for sure. I was basically on the bridge of just giving up because I thought I couldn't fix what you felt. That's why I'm scared of you, I don't want to feel that way again."

I could see the pain still in his eyes, it was like reliving that argument all over again. I cupped his face in my hands and looked at him. I felt guilty, this man, my boyfriend still hurts just as if it happened yesterday. I pulled him in and gave him a quick kiss.

"Goten, don't think about that. Everything worked out and we're together now. You won the fight Goten."

"I know. But you see why I hate arguing with you Bra?"

"Yeah..."

"So the rest of the night, let me enjoy my night with you ok?"

"Of course."

That night we spent laughing and talking. I spotted a family of ducks waddling around and mentioned it was cute. Goten started chasing the ducks trying to catch one baby duckling. I laughed and felt like my heart bloomed as I watched this man, this goofy guy who I was proud to call my boyfriend, chase these ducks just to pick one up for me. I realized then, how good I had it with him, learning so much everyday, knowing that he'd be by my side to laugh, cry, and be angry with. He was so much a part of my life, I couldn't see myself happy without him. This is what I needed, just a night of enjoyment with no arguing. These were the times I loved being with him...

"Here honey, look a baby." He said so sweetly and out of breath. He held the baby duck in his hands and allowed me to pet it. It's feathers were so soft and it was so cute! I gave it a little kiss on its forehead.

"Hey, you cheated on me in front of my face Agh! How dare you cheat on me! I hate you, we're breaking up." He said in a mocking voice of a prissy teenage girl. He set the little duck down and snapped his finger in front of me turning around imitating a girl again. I shook my head and laughed as I wrapped my arms from behind him.

"You're so ridiculous. I love you."

We stared at the ducks and laughed a bit more. Soon his laughing began to fade.

"Bra?"

"Mmm?"

"How old did you want to be when we have our first baby?"

Huh? I felt my heart skip a beat. I froze. B-baby? We never spoke about this before. What might he be thinking? Our first baby? The thought was kind of queezy but cute...

"I ...don't... know. Why?"

He turned around and began rubbing my arms and looked at me.

"Well... just asking. If it were to accidentally happen you know... I just want to make sure we can handle it together."

"Is that why you're getting a job? You're worried about the family?"

"Well... somewhat... I plan to marry you and have a family with you Bra."

"Goten..."

"But that's my dream for now. Anyway, it's getting late. I need to get you home. I'll come over again say... afternoon?"

I smiled as the thought still took over my heart. I nodded as he swooped me off my feet and headed home. The whole trip home, we stayed silent. I looked at him with more passion, more love. I smiled and just stared at him. Can this really be the guy I grew up with? The son of a guy my father used to hate? The man who I used to think of as a player, the man who taught me of love and heartache, the one who changed my life forever... A family with him huh? Him, my husband and our kids living in a nice house... when would that lifestyle start? I continued thinking about how my life would be in the future with him... eventhough I'm basically eating the words I spoke 2 years ago when I told him not to look too far into the future... That lifestyle would be my one purpose for living...

We flew into the dark starry night sky as he held me in his arms. I kissed him on the cheek and just smiled at he looked back at me with those dark shining eyes.

"Goten..." I pulled myself closer to him me as he responded holding me. A warm tear released from my eye onto my cheek. I was so happy... this feeling... how am I supposed to describe it? Every time I'm with him I seem to fall more deeper into was seems like a fairy tale...