A/N: Wow. Lotta reviews. Everyone really hates Mary-Sues, huh? ^^;; And jus Kita, I don't really hate CYOA authors. It's just that there are so many CYOA fics, that it's starting to get really annoying. I wouldn't mind if there were just a few of them, but c'mon, 75% of the fics in the YYH section are either Mary-Sues or CYOA fics! That's all I meant. And Sarah, the girls will be showing up soon. And there's a reason Crystal's not as annoying as-*mouth gets covered by Kuronue*
Kuronue: Don't give it away!
Ammy: Oh, right…^^;; Heehee…
Kuronue: Idiot. -.-;;
Disclaimer: I'm honored that you might even consider that I would on Yu Yu Hakusho. Too bad I don't, ne?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Attack of the Mary-Sues!
Chapter 2
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Will you get off of him?" Hiei growled. He would have strangled Sakura, but both Kurama and he had been tied to chairs by the Mary-Sues.
"Why?" Sakura asked, draping herself over Kurama's lap. "He loves me, after all!" She smirked.
"Sakura, would you please get off?" Kurama asked in a pained voice. He couldn't stand being polite for much longer.
"But Kurama dear," Sakura pouted, wrapping her arms around his neck. "You know you love me!"
"No, I don't." Kurama said through gritted teeth.
Sakura pouted and opened her mouth to reply, but a loud pounding sounded from the door.
"OPEN UP! OPEN UP, DAMMIT!" A voice screeched from the other side.
"Oh no…" Sakura paled. Hopping of Kurama's lap, she ran over to the door.
"Tara? Tara, is that you?" She shouted through the heavily locked door.
"WHO DO YOU THINK IT IS? I WANT MY BOOK BACK, AND I WANT KNOW!" Tara shouted back, pounding on the door.
"Crystal!" Sakura yelped, jumping back from the door and ran over to a far corner in which the female fire demon was lurking.
"What?" Crystal asked, shutting off her cell phone.
"Who were you talking to?" Sakura blinked.
"Uhh…my mom?" Crystal said, hiding the phone behind her back.
"I thought your mom was, like, in the slammer?"
"…She is. I'm, uh, allowed to…allowed to call her once a week! Yep, that's it!" Crystal said, nervously fiddling with her hair.
"Whatever," Sakura said, "Anyway, we got a problem. And it starts with a T."
"Don't tell me…"
"I know!"
"We're out of tiramisu?"
"…Uhh, no. Tara's at the door."
"Oh no."
"Oh yes!"
Crystal crossed the room quickly, leaning against the door, "Tara?"
"CRYSTAL! OPEN UP THIS FRICKIN' DOOR!"
"Why Tara, I thought you could just blast the door open!" Crystal said, sarcasm dripping from her voice.
"SHUT UP! OPEN THIS DOOR!"
"I'll open this door on one condition."
"…What?" The reply sounded strained.
"We'll let you in and give you back your spell book, but you have to be civil about it. No trying to blow this place sky high."
"Like she could!" Sakura grumbled.
"…Fine." Tara said in a malice filled voice.
After a few minutes of trying to undo all the locks on the door, Crystal gave up and let Tara in through a window.
Tara was a human, with emerald green eyes and light brown hair. Not that that mattered, but Mary-Sues always feel the need to let the reader's know what they look like. Well, on with the story.
"Oh, how nice to see you," Sakura muttered from her position in Kurama's lap. Our poor kitsune was twitching in a very interesting fashion, and Hiei was attempting to kill Sakura with a glare.
"Found yourself some new pets, I see," Tara said coldly, eyeing Kurama. "They don't seem to like you much."
Sakura bristled, her fox ears flattening against her head.
Crystal rolled her eyes, opening the door of a closet and standing on tiptoes, feeling across the top shelf with her finger tips. "Got it!" She yelled, before an avalanche of high heeled shoes and mascara fell on top of her. "Ow…"
Kurama eyed the buried Crystal, "Is she going to be okay?" Sure, the girl had kidnapped him and was working with this crazy ditz who was glomping him, but you had to feel sorry for her- those shoes HURT!
"Who cares?" Sakura said offhandedly, she was busy filing her nails.
Kurama twitched, again.
"Ow…" Crystal moaned again, picking herself off the ground, clutching a large leather-bound book.
"My book!" Tara cried, grabbing the book out of Crystal's hands.
"Thank you, Crystal. You're welcome, Tara," Crystal muttered from her resumed position, lurking in a corner. She'd long since given up on Hiei. He bit, and he bit hard.
"Well, little Tara got her magic book back. Isn't that something?" Sakura mocked.
"What did you say?" Tara growled, raising a fist.
"Oh, look, little miss Tara can't do anything without her book." Sakura continued, "I thought you were strong, dear. But I guess not."
"I'll show you strong!" Tara shouted, opening her spell book and flipping through it until she found what she wanted. "I'm going to do something horrible to your little pet!" She began chanting a spell. A ball of light formed above the page and Tara grinned, pointing at Kurama. Sakura shrieked something, diving behind one of the many sofas in the room.
"Aishiteru," Kurama mouthed to Hiei as a mysterious wind picked up, whipping his crimson locks around.
Hiei nodded, looking rather shocked.
The light got brighter and brighter until everyone had to shut their eyes against it. When the light cleared, a very shocking site met everyone's eyes.
"What the hell did you do to him?" Hiei growled.
"Uh…I didn't mean for this to happen," Tara blinked.
"What happened?" Kurama blinked. He looked at Hiei and followed the Jaganshi's gaze…and his eyes fell upon the great Makai thief, Yoko Kurama. His demon self.
Kurama stared for a moment, before his eyes rolled back and he collapsed in a dead faint.
Yoko brushed a few strands of silver hair behind a furry fox ear, "This is so cool!" He yipped. "Finally, I can steal some really neat shiny stuff!"
Sakura peeped out from behind the back of the couch, "And I thought he was cool before," She murmured, her eyes turning into hearts.
"Well, that didn't work!" Tara frowned, flipping through her book again. "You're in for some serious competition, Sakura!" She smirked, and began chanting again.
Some more blinding light and a few minutes later, a very confused formerly dead bat demon stood in the middle of the room.
"…Huh?" Was all Kuronue could say. Just a few moments ago he was resting in peace, and now he was in a room with three strange girls, one unconscious androgynous redhead, a scowling fire demon and…Yoko Kurama?
"Kuronue!" The formerly-dead demon had nearly had the life knocked out of him again as his former thieving partner glomped him. "I thought you were dead!"
"So did I…" Kuronue muttered, absentmindedly stroking one of Yoko's silver fox ears.
"But now that your back, we can steal some really cool shiny stuff, right?"
"You have a one track mind, koibito."
"Not true," Yoko purred, whispering something in Kuronue's ear. Kuronue nearly got a nosebleed. "See," Yoko smiled slyly, "I do think about other things."
"They're all gay!" Sakura wailed, collapsing on to the couch.
Crystal could only stare wide-eyed, grabbing her cell phone and huddling in a corner, dialing a number.
"Hello? We've got a problem…"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CLIFFHANGER! XD I love writing these things.
Kuronue:*Doing…stuff…with Yoko in a closet*
Ammy:*Holds up a sign that says "Review and I'll send you a video tape of what's going on in that closet!"*