A/N: Saw Kurst The Not So Bad recently. Heard this song this morning. Got inspired. Anyway, this is a Mikey/Kurst shipper songfic. Hope you like it! Told in Mikey's POV
I'll always remember
It was late afternoon
It lasted forever
And ended so soon
You were all by yourself
Staring up at a dark gray sky
I was changed
In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
Was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The moment that I saw you cry
cry..moment that I saw you cry
I remember when I first saw the real Kristin Kurst. Not the bully, not the one who people considered to be a pig, but the girl who in actuality had a heart of gold and was more like me that I ever dared to realize. I remember her sitting in Kelso's eating one of those special springtime sundaes that we both loved so much back in fourth grade. She had said that people called her Kurst the Worst behind her back and wondered why I wasn't doing the same, even though I secretly thought she was Ôa very bad girl,' as I had once even said to her face. She said something nasty back, but there was something about her that made me change my mind about her, something that made me think that she just might not be that bad after all.
I recall looking into those beautiful green eyes, eyes that were often filled with hate and seeing someone who wanted to be loved, someone who was actually hurt by all the teasing she had received. She had blinked, and for the first time, I noticed tears forming in her eyes. She had tried to fight them, but I knew they were there and I had become the first person to see Kurst the Worst as a human being with emotion, as someone I wouldn't mind being friends, or perhaps even more with one day. What I saw was Kristin Kurst, an ordinary girl with real emotions that made me realize that I was wrong in thinking that she was a horrible person for all this time.
It was late in SeptemberAnd I've seen you before (and you were)
You were always the cold one
But I was never that sure
You were all by yourself
Staring up at a dark gray sky
I was changed
In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
Was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry
Fast forward seven years to when we were in our junior year of high school. Kurst still acted the way she did before our meeting at Kelso's in front of others, but I still saw that look of wanting to be loved in her eyes. Every time she pushed someone or stole someone's lunch money, I would wonder to myself if it was because she was really as bad as everyone said she was, or if it was because she wanted somebody to notice her---to get the attention she never got at home. I recall walking home from school alone one day---the rest of my friends had some sort of plans--- and hearing someone crying. I had walked to where I heard the person crying and noticed Kurst sitting near the lake, staring into the dark gray sky, which seemed to fit the somber mood she appeared to be in. I don't think she heard me approach, so I just stood there, looking at the still overweight redhead who was finally showing the emotion that had been hidden for so many years. I finally walked over to her and sat next to her, putting my arms around her, holding her and just letting her cry.
I wanted to hold you
I wanted to make it go away
I wanted to know you
I wanted to make your everything, all right....
I had been sitting there for a few seconds, just hugging her silently, when she looked up and finally noticed it was me.
Mikey, what are you doing here? she asked me.
I saw you here and you look like you could use a friend, I told her.
Well, I don't, so why don't you go back to calling me Kurst the Worst, just like everybody else, she told me bitterly, jerking away from me.
Because you aren't Kurst the Worst, I said simply. You are Kristin Kurst, someone who is human, just like the rest of us, someone who I would love to have as a friend. In all actuality, at that moment I wanted more than just friendship, but she didn't need to know that just then.
You really think of me like that? she asked, turning to me and looking at me with suspicious eyes. After all the crap I pulled on you and your friends, you still think of me as someone who actually deserves a good friend?
Of course I do, and right now it's killing me that you are crying like this, I told her, hugging her again, a hug she this time responded to. And this time she actually allowed herself to cry in front of me, telling me why she was always so mean to others. It wasn't because she liked being a bully, it was because she was actually suffering from something far deeper than just random anger and bitchiness. All her life, Kurst had suffered from a potentially terminal illness, and acted out in anger because she was too afraid to get close to someone, in fear that she would end up having to leave them one day.
It's ok, I told her, still holding her and bringing her face to mine. You have me, and I love you, not out of pity, but because I see you as a wonderful, beautiful person who deserves someone to be there for her, now more than ever.
For a moment, Kurst just looked at me with an expression I couldn't quite read. At first, I thought she was mad at me, but then she took me by surprise and kissed me and I knew at that moment, Kurst knew what it was like to love and be loved in return.
I'll always remember...
It was late afternoon...
In places no one would find...
In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
Was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry
The two of us had more special moments like that throughout our two year relationship. We were in love, and it was all because she had let me see a side of her that she had so carefully hidden for so many years. But then something happened that changed everything.
I had been planning that day for several weeks, and my buddy Gus had helped me get reservations to take Kurst to New York for our anniversary, so I could finally take her to see the Statue of Liberty like she always wanted. I had everything planned to the last detail and was just about to leave my house when I got the call from her mother telling me that she had passed away that morning.
For many months after, I was torn apart, only leaving my house when it was absolutely necessary. All I could think about was how Kurst never got the chance to live the kind of life she deserved, the kind of life she only dreamed of living. Although it hurt me to do so, I knew I had to go on with my life, and eventually I ended up getting married to Cornchip Girl, but I never forgot my wonderful relationship with Kurst and how I was the only one who got to see the side of her that was so beautiful, the side that showed the soul of someone very special.
A/N: this is what finals stress leads to, sappy songfics that aren't going to make sense in the morning. I hope you like it and I will upodate my other stories ASAP. Please send me some soul hugs for this, I worked hard on it, despite my lack of sleep and sanity! I love you all and thank you for reading!