Where Nothing is Clear 3/?
By Ginny
While Jed managed to eat some oatmeal and drink some tea Abbey called his doctor for a little advice. Although she was perfectly able to handle his current symptoms she liked to have a second opinion. While she talked to Tom she flipped through the phone book and found the number for a local pharmacy. After assuring Tom she would call him later to update him on Jed's symptoms Abbey called in a prescription for Bactrim and one for a decongestant. Deciding that a little fresh air was in order Abbey walked the 6 blocks to the pharmacy, followed at a discreet distance by a member of the small security detail that had come with them to the island.
When she returned she found Jed curled up in the chair trying to read. Judging by the fact that he kept covering and uncovering his left eye it wasn't going too well. "Hey," Abbey said as she shut the front door behind her. Jed looked up and gave her a broad grin as he pulled off his glasses and tossed the book aside. He followed Abbey into the kitchen where she gave him the pills and a bottle of water.
"So should we expect a group of reporters to camp outside the front door any time soon?" he asked, knowing his name on a prescription would raise some suspicions.
"Jed, it's Bactrim. It's not like a prescription for Morphine. By the way, the pharmacist said to feel better soon."
"Great," muttered Jed under his breath. "I'm going to take a shower," he announced as he downed the rest of the water and pitched the empty bottle in the trash.
"Not too hot," Abbey warned over her shoulder as she put the pill bottles on the counter and opened the fridge to find something for lunch.
"Thanks for the suggestion Gumdrop," Jed smirked as he turned to head up the stairs. He was halfway up when a wave of dizziness hit him. Somehow he made it to the bedroom before his knees buckled under him and he went down. The thud of him hitting the floor sent Abbey up the stairs in a flash. She pushed the bedroom door open to find Jed out cold on the floor by the chair. She knelt next to him and pressed her fingers to his neck, checking his pulse. Satisfied his heart was beating and he was breathing she carefully rolled him over. As she did he started to come around.
"Jed, can you hear me?" she asked rubbed his shoulder. He nodded a little and struggled to open his eyes. "That's good, open your eyes, focus on me," Abbey urged as she leaned over to the table to get her bag. Jed struggled to focus and sit up but Abbey's hand on his shoulder prevented him from going very far. "Stay still for a minute. Did you hit your head when you fell?" Jed shrugged his shoulders, honestly not sure of the answer to that question. Abbey ran her hands lightly over his head until she was satisfied there were no growing welts. She took his blood pressure, getting a rather low but fully expected reading. "Just stay still," she repeated as Jed tried to sit up again. Abbey stuck a pillow under his head and brushed back his hair. "You ready to sit up?" she asked about 5 minutes later when he started to get a little back in his face.
"Yeah," he answered weakly. With Abbey's help Jed sat up and scooted over a little so he could lean back against the chair. She stuck the ear thermometer in his right ear to get a quick reading. "Back up again, 101.3," she announced with a sigh. "What happened?" Abbey asked as she sat down next to him, the stethoscope still around her neck and the blood pressure cuff next to her on the floor.
"You are so damn sexy with this thing around your neck," he smirked as he tugged on the stethoscope, doing his best to avoid her question. Abbey pulled the stethoscope off and tossed it back in the bag.
"Jed," she warned, letting him know it would be wise for him to start talking.
"I was halfway up the stairs and I got dizzy. My vision got fuzzy and then dim. I was trying to make it to the bed but came up a few feet short. My legs just kind of gave out and I went down. That's all I remember," he said quietly as he reached for Abbey's hand.
"It's ok," Abbey sighed as she squeezed his hand. As she felt him to start to shake and saw the fear in his eyes her doctor mask faded away. Her own fear that had been lurking behind that mask came to the surface. She put her arm around Jed's shaking shoulders and pulled him close. Tears ran down both their faces, tears of fear, uncertainty and pain. Abbey was able to pull herself together much quicker than Jed. She got up and went to the bathroom to grab some tissues and a cool, damp washcloth. "Honey, you're going to hyperventilate. Take a deep breath and hold it," she coached. Jed leaned his head back against the couch and took a few deep halting breaths trying his best to slow down his breathing. He'd already passed out once; he didn't want to do it again. Abbey knelt next to him and gently wiped his face. "Think you're ready to get up?" she asked as she tucked her hair behind her ears.
"Not yet," Jed sighed.
"It's ok," said Abbey gently as she sat back down next to him. She reached to grab a pillow off of the chair. Putting it in her lap she tugged on Jed's shoulder until he put his head down. She covered him with blanket and put the cool damp cloth on his forehead.
"I'm scared," Jed whispered, taking care not to look Abbey in the eye.
"I know, sweetie, I know."
"So I guess my bid for the Presidency just ended when you had to pick me up off of the floor?" he asked quietly. Abbey just shook her head. "No?" asked Jed.
"No."
"No? Really?" asked Jed figuring his clogged ears were playing tricks on him. He didn't believe for a second that Abbey would still agree to his plans.
"Jed, while I think that we're both completely nuts for wanting to do this, I will support you," she said with a smile as she ran her fingertips over his stubbled chin. "But we do need to discuss a few things." she added seriously.
"Then help me up, cause I don't want to get into a serious conversation on the floor," he said with as much of a grin as he could manage. He held out his hand so Abbey could help pull him to his feet. He stood still for a minute getting his bearings.
"Where to?" asked Abbey as she took a hold of his arm. Jed pointed towards the loveseat tucked under the window. Abbey settled him down and tossed a quilt over him. "I'll be back in minute, let me get you something to drink," she said.
While Abbey ran downstairs Jed looked out the window. A fog had rolled in and between that and his slightly blurry vision he quickly gave up on trying to look at much of anything. He heard the phone ring and Abbey's voice drift up the stairway. It sounded like she was talking to one of their girls. He stretched out on the loveseat with his feet on the arm rest and his left arm flung over his eyes. Abbey's phone conversation gave him some time to get his thoughts together. Over the previous week or so he'd spent hours trying to come up with rebuttals to every concern that Abbey could possible have about his running for President. But curled up on the couch he was having trouble remembering what those convincing words were. He could blame his brain fog on the congestion in his head or his general exhaustion, both were perfectly plausible excuses. But in the back of his mind was the reality of the cognitive component of MS. It was always there lurking, coming out every time he stumbled over his words, forgot a name, a date or a face. Cognitive difficulties were not a given, nothing was in the world of MS and that was the part that scared him the most.
"Jed...Jed," Abbey called from the doorway after hanging up the phone. He seemed miles away, staring at the ceiling.
"Huh?" he asked, suddenly aware of the fact that he had completely zoned out. He had no idea how long Abbey had been standing there.
"You were a million miles away," she commented as she crossed the room. He sat up enough to let her sit down in the corner. She handed him a can of ginger ale and offered him a piece of the orange she'd peeled while she was on the phone. He just declined with a shake of his head. "That was Zoey on the phone. She only had a few minutes to talk, it's her lunch period. She wanted to see how you were doing."
"You didn't give her all the gory details did you?" he asked as he put the can of soda on the side table and stretched back out, putting his feet in Abbey's lap.
"No. I just told her that it looked like you had an ear infection and you were going to take it easy for the next few days."
"Oh. So...." Jed said not knowing exactly where to start.
"Yeah, so where do we start?" Abbey wondered as she popped a piece of orange into her mouth.
"I was hoping you had some idea," Jed replied with a weary smile.
"I'm trying to convince myself to stick with the feelings I had three days ago."
"Which were?"
"To support you no matter what, to be excited about the prospect of a Presidential campaign."
"And now?"
"And now I'm trying not to freak out," she admitted as she let out a frustrated breath.
"You're not the only one. I still want it. I want to try. I won't get very far, we both know that. So what'll it hurt? We get through a few primaries, dangle our feet in the water and then we'll go home to the farm. The whole thing will end up being a good story we can tell the grandchildren someday."
"Yeah. But what if it's not? What if you actually win? Then what?"
"Abigail you're getting way ahead of yourself."
"Yes, I am. But there are certain things we need to discuss, now. Before we go any further." Jed just nodded, knowing exactly where the conversation was heading. "For the past four years we've basically kept your condition a secret." Jed just nodded, waiting for Abbey to continue. "Can we continue to do that?"
"Why not? It's been easy to conceal."
"That's not the point, Jed." Abbey said calmly as she wiped her hands on a napkin. "And in case you haven't realized, if what happened today happens on the campaign trail, in the middle of a debate, in front of a television camera then the jig is up. Think about that. Wouldn't it be better to get it out in the open now, before things get too far?" Abbey asked as she leaned her head back on the couch and closed her eyes for a second. Not having gotten much sleep the night before she was rather tired.
"Get things out in the open now? Are you kidding Abigail?" Jed asked as he started to sit up. He did so quickly and his already precarious sense of equilibrium took a beating. The groan he tried to hold in slipped out, causing Abbey's eyes to fly open.
"Jed?"
"I'm fine," he muttered, feeling anything but fine.
"I wasn't kidding," Abbey pointed out.
"No, I won't do it. I am not going public until I have to," said Jed doing a very good imitation of a whiny child.
"And when will that be? When you pass out on national television?" asked Abbey as she pushed his feet off her lap and stood up. She paced for a few minutes watching him as she did. Jed had this way about him when they were involved in a serious discussion, he wouldn't look at her directly, instead he would drop his head down and peek at her every few minutes, often over the rims of his reading glasses. It was a look she found very cute and she knew that's why he tended to use it when she was upset with him. But this time it didn't seem like he was doing that. She watched him as he squinted a little, obviously trying to get his eyes to focus.
"We're not going to get to the point where we need to tell anyone."
"How can you be sure Jed?" asked Abbey.
"Abigail, I'm about to be a former Governor from New England with a degree in Economics, the Democratic party isn't stupid enough to nominate me," he chuckled.
Abbey was not amused by his humor. "Jeeeeed..." she said, drawing his name out as she closed her eyes for a second looking for strength, "How can you be so unconcerned about this? Aren't you scared about how the rigors of the campaign will affect you?"
It took a minute for Jed to gather enough courage to answer honestly. "Scared Abigail? No, I'm not scared," he said as Abbey stopped her pacing long enough to look him in the eye. "I'm terrified," he whispered.
Abbey took a deep, shaky breath as she crossed the room and knelt next to him. She tentatively reached out to take him into her arms but he recoiled before she could touch him, trying his best to disappear into the corner of the loveseat. Abbey recognized his gesture, he had some things to say and didn't want to fall apart saying them. He was hanging on by a thread and it would not have taken much to strip away the thin veneer of strength he was doing his best to hide behind. He was not normally an overly emotional man for the most part. But when he was not feeling well he had trouble keeping his emotions in check. Abbey sat down on the floor next to him waiting silently for him to continue.
"It terrifies me to think that I could be fine one minute and face down on the floor the next. But I can't live my life waiting for the other shoe to drop."
"Jed, no one is asking you to disappear into a hole. You've been a Congressman and a Governor, isn't that enough?" Abbey asked. She regretted the words the instant they left her lips. She didn't mean them and deep down Jed knew that. They came out of frustration. The same frustration Jed was feeling. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she smiled through the tears that had welled up in her eyes.
"I know," he whispered as he reached to clumsily wipe away her tears. He wanted to sit up, to hold her in his arms but he knew that sitting up quickly would be a mistake. Tugging on her hand a little he got her to stretch out next to him on the loveseat. He wanted to hold her, to comfort her but it was Abbey who ended up doing the comforting a minute later when the dam broke and Jed's emotions spilled out.
"Jed, honey you need to calm down," she whispered as the tears streamed down his face. He was trying his best to calm himself but he was starting to hyperventilate. Abbey extracted herself from his arms and grabbed her bag off the table. She pulled out a paper bag and knelt next to Jed. "Jed, listen to me," she said firmly as she reached to roll him onto his side, facing her. "Just breathe into the bag," she coached. "Concentrate on what you're doing." Jed looked at her, his blue eyes wide with fear. He followed Abbey's lead, concentrating on breathing slowly and deeply. He tried to focus on the sweet scent of orange that lingered on her fingers. "Good, that's good," she assured him as she brush back his hair. When she was sure he wasn't going to pass out she tossed the paper bag aside. "OK?" Jed just nodded, not quite ready to trust his voice.
Both he and Abbey knew they had a lot more to talk about, hours worth of concerns needed to be aired, more tears that needed to be shed. But there was only so much Jed could take at one time. And he'd just reached his limit.
"Sweetie why don't you rest for a while? We can talk more later," she suggested as she gently wiped Jed's face with a damp cloth.
"OK," came his barely audible reply.
"Get into bed. If you sleep here you'll have to add aching back to your list of complaints," Abbey teased gently as she helped him sit up. "Just sit for a minute before you try to stand," she suggested as she turned to draw the blinds a little to darken the room.
"Shit," she heard him mutter. In one swift motion she reached over, guided his head down between his knees and grabbed the wastebasket in the nick of time.
Fifteen minutes later she'd managed to help Jed into a new shirt, wash out the wastebasket and help him cross the room to the bed. She pulled off his slippers and lifted his legs onto the bed. "I want to give you some Compazine; it'll relax you a little and settle your stomach. OK?" Jed could only nod in agreement. Abbey found the syringe in her bag and pulled down his sweatpants, exposing the back of his hip. Jed flinched and let out a little groan as she pushed the needle in. She rubbed the site for a few seconds before pulling his sweats back up and covering him with the quilt.
She sat with him for about 15 minutes, until she was sure he was out. She put a cool cloth on his forehead and turned out the lights. With a weary sigh she went downstairs to get something to eat. She sat at the table in the kitchen eating a sandwich but not really tasting anything. There was still so much she wanted to say to Jed but she didn't want to upset him even more. It was a fine line to toe, one she wasn't sure she could toe for much longer.
Abbey wearily dragged herself up the stairs a little after 3 and crawled into bed with her husband. Jed didn't even move when she did.
TBC
By Ginny
While Jed managed to eat some oatmeal and drink some tea Abbey called his doctor for a little advice. Although she was perfectly able to handle his current symptoms she liked to have a second opinion. While she talked to Tom she flipped through the phone book and found the number for a local pharmacy. After assuring Tom she would call him later to update him on Jed's symptoms Abbey called in a prescription for Bactrim and one for a decongestant. Deciding that a little fresh air was in order Abbey walked the 6 blocks to the pharmacy, followed at a discreet distance by a member of the small security detail that had come with them to the island.
When she returned she found Jed curled up in the chair trying to read. Judging by the fact that he kept covering and uncovering his left eye it wasn't going too well. "Hey," Abbey said as she shut the front door behind her. Jed looked up and gave her a broad grin as he pulled off his glasses and tossed the book aside. He followed Abbey into the kitchen where she gave him the pills and a bottle of water.
"So should we expect a group of reporters to camp outside the front door any time soon?" he asked, knowing his name on a prescription would raise some suspicions.
"Jed, it's Bactrim. It's not like a prescription for Morphine. By the way, the pharmacist said to feel better soon."
"Great," muttered Jed under his breath. "I'm going to take a shower," he announced as he downed the rest of the water and pitched the empty bottle in the trash.
"Not too hot," Abbey warned over her shoulder as she put the pill bottles on the counter and opened the fridge to find something for lunch.
"Thanks for the suggestion Gumdrop," Jed smirked as he turned to head up the stairs. He was halfway up when a wave of dizziness hit him. Somehow he made it to the bedroom before his knees buckled under him and he went down. The thud of him hitting the floor sent Abbey up the stairs in a flash. She pushed the bedroom door open to find Jed out cold on the floor by the chair. She knelt next to him and pressed her fingers to his neck, checking his pulse. Satisfied his heart was beating and he was breathing she carefully rolled him over. As she did he started to come around.
"Jed, can you hear me?" she asked rubbed his shoulder. He nodded a little and struggled to open his eyes. "That's good, open your eyes, focus on me," Abbey urged as she leaned over to the table to get her bag. Jed struggled to focus and sit up but Abbey's hand on his shoulder prevented him from going very far. "Stay still for a minute. Did you hit your head when you fell?" Jed shrugged his shoulders, honestly not sure of the answer to that question. Abbey ran her hands lightly over his head until she was satisfied there were no growing welts. She took his blood pressure, getting a rather low but fully expected reading. "Just stay still," she repeated as Jed tried to sit up again. Abbey stuck a pillow under his head and brushed back his hair. "You ready to sit up?" she asked about 5 minutes later when he started to get a little back in his face.
"Yeah," he answered weakly. With Abbey's help Jed sat up and scooted over a little so he could lean back against the chair. She stuck the ear thermometer in his right ear to get a quick reading. "Back up again, 101.3," she announced with a sigh. "What happened?" Abbey asked as she sat down next to him, the stethoscope still around her neck and the blood pressure cuff next to her on the floor.
"You are so damn sexy with this thing around your neck," he smirked as he tugged on the stethoscope, doing his best to avoid her question. Abbey pulled the stethoscope off and tossed it back in the bag.
"Jed," she warned, letting him know it would be wise for him to start talking.
"I was halfway up the stairs and I got dizzy. My vision got fuzzy and then dim. I was trying to make it to the bed but came up a few feet short. My legs just kind of gave out and I went down. That's all I remember," he said quietly as he reached for Abbey's hand.
"It's ok," Abbey sighed as she squeezed his hand. As she felt him to start to shake and saw the fear in his eyes her doctor mask faded away. Her own fear that had been lurking behind that mask came to the surface. She put her arm around Jed's shaking shoulders and pulled him close. Tears ran down both their faces, tears of fear, uncertainty and pain. Abbey was able to pull herself together much quicker than Jed. She got up and went to the bathroom to grab some tissues and a cool, damp washcloth. "Honey, you're going to hyperventilate. Take a deep breath and hold it," she coached. Jed leaned his head back against the couch and took a few deep halting breaths trying his best to slow down his breathing. He'd already passed out once; he didn't want to do it again. Abbey knelt next to him and gently wiped his face. "Think you're ready to get up?" she asked as she tucked her hair behind her ears.
"Not yet," Jed sighed.
"It's ok," said Abbey gently as she sat back down next to him. She reached to grab a pillow off of the chair. Putting it in her lap she tugged on Jed's shoulder until he put his head down. She covered him with blanket and put the cool damp cloth on his forehead.
"I'm scared," Jed whispered, taking care not to look Abbey in the eye.
"I know, sweetie, I know."
"So I guess my bid for the Presidency just ended when you had to pick me up off of the floor?" he asked quietly. Abbey just shook her head. "No?" asked Jed.
"No."
"No? Really?" asked Jed figuring his clogged ears were playing tricks on him. He didn't believe for a second that Abbey would still agree to his plans.
"Jed, while I think that we're both completely nuts for wanting to do this, I will support you," she said with a smile as she ran her fingertips over his stubbled chin. "But we do need to discuss a few things." she added seriously.
"Then help me up, cause I don't want to get into a serious conversation on the floor," he said with as much of a grin as he could manage. He held out his hand so Abbey could help pull him to his feet. He stood still for a minute getting his bearings.
"Where to?" asked Abbey as she took a hold of his arm. Jed pointed towards the loveseat tucked under the window. Abbey settled him down and tossed a quilt over him. "I'll be back in minute, let me get you something to drink," she said.
While Abbey ran downstairs Jed looked out the window. A fog had rolled in and between that and his slightly blurry vision he quickly gave up on trying to look at much of anything. He heard the phone ring and Abbey's voice drift up the stairway. It sounded like she was talking to one of their girls. He stretched out on the loveseat with his feet on the arm rest and his left arm flung over his eyes. Abbey's phone conversation gave him some time to get his thoughts together. Over the previous week or so he'd spent hours trying to come up with rebuttals to every concern that Abbey could possible have about his running for President. But curled up on the couch he was having trouble remembering what those convincing words were. He could blame his brain fog on the congestion in his head or his general exhaustion, both were perfectly plausible excuses. But in the back of his mind was the reality of the cognitive component of MS. It was always there lurking, coming out every time he stumbled over his words, forgot a name, a date or a face. Cognitive difficulties were not a given, nothing was in the world of MS and that was the part that scared him the most.
"Jed...Jed," Abbey called from the doorway after hanging up the phone. He seemed miles away, staring at the ceiling.
"Huh?" he asked, suddenly aware of the fact that he had completely zoned out. He had no idea how long Abbey had been standing there.
"You were a million miles away," she commented as she crossed the room. He sat up enough to let her sit down in the corner. She handed him a can of ginger ale and offered him a piece of the orange she'd peeled while she was on the phone. He just declined with a shake of his head. "That was Zoey on the phone. She only had a few minutes to talk, it's her lunch period. She wanted to see how you were doing."
"You didn't give her all the gory details did you?" he asked as he put the can of soda on the side table and stretched back out, putting his feet in Abbey's lap.
"No. I just told her that it looked like you had an ear infection and you were going to take it easy for the next few days."
"Oh. So...." Jed said not knowing exactly where to start.
"Yeah, so where do we start?" Abbey wondered as she popped a piece of orange into her mouth.
"I was hoping you had some idea," Jed replied with a weary smile.
"I'm trying to convince myself to stick with the feelings I had three days ago."
"Which were?"
"To support you no matter what, to be excited about the prospect of a Presidential campaign."
"And now?"
"And now I'm trying not to freak out," she admitted as she let out a frustrated breath.
"You're not the only one. I still want it. I want to try. I won't get very far, we both know that. So what'll it hurt? We get through a few primaries, dangle our feet in the water and then we'll go home to the farm. The whole thing will end up being a good story we can tell the grandchildren someday."
"Yeah. But what if it's not? What if you actually win? Then what?"
"Abigail you're getting way ahead of yourself."
"Yes, I am. But there are certain things we need to discuss, now. Before we go any further." Jed just nodded, knowing exactly where the conversation was heading. "For the past four years we've basically kept your condition a secret." Jed just nodded, waiting for Abbey to continue. "Can we continue to do that?"
"Why not? It's been easy to conceal."
"That's not the point, Jed." Abbey said calmly as she wiped her hands on a napkin. "And in case you haven't realized, if what happened today happens on the campaign trail, in the middle of a debate, in front of a television camera then the jig is up. Think about that. Wouldn't it be better to get it out in the open now, before things get too far?" Abbey asked as she leaned her head back on the couch and closed her eyes for a second. Not having gotten much sleep the night before she was rather tired.
"Get things out in the open now? Are you kidding Abigail?" Jed asked as he started to sit up. He did so quickly and his already precarious sense of equilibrium took a beating. The groan he tried to hold in slipped out, causing Abbey's eyes to fly open.
"Jed?"
"I'm fine," he muttered, feeling anything but fine.
"I wasn't kidding," Abbey pointed out.
"No, I won't do it. I am not going public until I have to," said Jed doing a very good imitation of a whiny child.
"And when will that be? When you pass out on national television?" asked Abbey as she pushed his feet off her lap and stood up. She paced for a few minutes watching him as she did. Jed had this way about him when they were involved in a serious discussion, he wouldn't look at her directly, instead he would drop his head down and peek at her every few minutes, often over the rims of his reading glasses. It was a look she found very cute and she knew that's why he tended to use it when she was upset with him. But this time it didn't seem like he was doing that. She watched him as he squinted a little, obviously trying to get his eyes to focus.
"We're not going to get to the point where we need to tell anyone."
"How can you be sure Jed?" asked Abbey.
"Abigail, I'm about to be a former Governor from New England with a degree in Economics, the Democratic party isn't stupid enough to nominate me," he chuckled.
Abbey was not amused by his humor. "Jeeeeed..." she said, drawing his name out as she closed her eyes for a second looking for strength, "How can you be so unconcerned about this? Aren't you scared about how the rigors of the campaign will affect you?"
It took a minute for Jed to gather enough courage to answer honestly. "Scared Abigail? No, I'm not scared," he said as Abbey stopped her pacing long enough to look him in the eye. "I'm terrified," he whispered.
Abbey took a deep, shaky breath as she crossed the room and knelt next to him. She tentatively reached out to take him into her arms but he recoiled before she could touch him, trying his best to disappear into the corner of the loveseat. Abbey recognized his gesture, he had some things to say and didn't want to fall apart saying them. He was hanging on by a thread and it would not have taken much to strip away the thin veneer of strength he was doing his best to hide behind. He was not normally an overly emotional man for the most part. But when he was not feeling well he had trouble keeping his emotions in check. Abbey sat down on the floor next to him waiting silently for him to continue.
"It terrifies me to think that I could be fine one minute and face down on the floor the next. But I can't live my life waiting for the other shoe to drop."
"Jed, no one is asking you to disappear into a hole. You've been a Congressman and a Governor, isn't that enough?" Abbey asked. She regretted the words the instant they left her lips. She didn't mean them and deep down Jed knew that. They came out of frustration. The same frustration Jed was feeling. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she smiled through the tears that had welled up in her eyes.
"I know," he whispered as he reached to clumsily wipe away her tears. He wanted to sit up, to hold her in his arms but he knew that sitting up quickly would be a mistake. Tugging on her hand a little he got her to stretch out next to him on the loveseat. He wanted to hold her, to comfort her but it was Abbey who ended up doing the comforting a minute later when the dam broke and Jed's emotions spilled out.
"Jed, honey you need to calm down," she whispered as the tears streamed down his face. He was trying his best to calm himself but he was starting to hyperventilate. Abbey extracted herself from his arms and grabbed her bag off the table. She pulled out a paper bag and knelt next to Jed. "Jed, listen to me," she said firmly as she reached to roll him onto his side, facing her. "Just breathe into the bag," she coached. "Concentrate on what you're doing." Jed looked at her, his blue eyes wide with fear. He followed Abbey's lead, concentrating on breathing slowly and deeply. He tried to focus on the sweet scent of orange that lingered on her fingers. "Good, that's good," she assured him as she brush back his hair. When she was sure he wasn't going to pass out she tossed the paper bag aside. "OK?" Jed just nodded, not quite ready to trust his voice.
Both he and Abbey knew they had a lot more to talk about, hours worth of concerns needed to be aired, more tears that needed to be shed. But there was only so much Jed could take at one time. And he'd just reached his limit.
"Sweetie why don't you rest for a while? We can talk more later," she suggested as she gently wiped Jed's face with a damp cloth.
"OK," came his barely audible reply.
"Get into bed. If you sleep here you'll have to add aching back to your list of complaints," Abbey teased gently as she helped him sit up. "Just sit for a minute before you try to stand," she suggested as she turned to draw the blinds a little to darken the room.
"Shit," she heard him mutter. In one swift motion she reached over, guided his head down between his knees and grabbed the wastebasket in the nick of time.
Fifteen minutes later she'd managed to help Jed into a new shirt, wash out the wastebasket and help him cross the room to the bed. She pulled off his slippers and lifted his legs onto the bed. "I want to give you some Compazine; it'll relax you a little and settle your stomach. OK?" Jed could only nod in agreement. Abbey found the syringe in her bag and pulled down his sweatpants, exposing the back of his hip. Jed flinched and let out a little groan as she pushed the needle in. She rubbed the site for a few seconds before pulling his sweats back up and covering him with the quilt.
She sat with him for about 15 minutes, until she was sure he was out. She put a cool cloth on his forehead and turned out the lights. With a weary sigh she went downstairs to get something to eat. She sat at the table in the kitchen eating a sandwich but not really tasting anything. There was still so much she wanted to say to Jed but she didn't want to upset him even more. It was a fine line to toe, one she wasn't sure she could toe for much longer.
Abbey wearily dragged herself up the stairs a little after 3 and crawled into bed with her husband. Jed didn't even move when she did.
TBC