Letting it all Go

by: SkittlesStar25

A/N: Ok, this is my first try at a Harry Potter thingy even though I've got 3 other stories in the making. This is a story about Draco, looking back on things and realizing that his future is pointless. read, enjoy and PLZ REVIEW! =)

So many years with her and it took me THIS long to realize how perfect she was. Sure, I knew she was better than me, so much better then me, but I couldn't bring myself to admit it. I'm a Malfoy and Malfoys are always supposed to be the best. Purebloods, evied by all. Yup, that's the Malfoy family. All except one, me. I'm the worst example of a Malfoy because I've let so many people get the best of me. That Potter. Ugh, just the sound of his name makes me wanna vomit. He's outwitted me so many times and I've never been better then him in anything. I can't even beat him in the Malfoy specialty. Dark Magic. He's better then me at that too! How can this be possible. And don't forget about his stupid little sidekick Weasley. His flaming red hair reminds me too much of blood and he's just so annoying. Always following around Potter like his little dog or something. He is the saddest excuse for a pureblood that I've ever seen! I almost wish his parent would just take him out of this school because he's such a disgrace! Father, how on Earth can you put up with Weasley at work? I'll never know. Let us not forget Granger. Mudblood Granger. Always trying to be a little no-it-all and try to solve everything. Although when Snape yells at her I almost feel bad for her. She's only trying to answer the questions, but she does act WAY too brainy. She needs to learn to voice her opinion when others are too lazy to do it. Over the years she's been trying to help others and even get the houses to get along. Granger, she's been trying to fix everything. Her becoming Head Girl with Potter as Head Boy doesn't help. He's not from another house at all, plus all he ever wants to go is horse around and go get into mischief. He's going to do something that even Granger won't be able to fix.
Like when Voldemort showed up. Granger couldn't do a thing to stop him. But that Potter. He had saved her. Sending Voldemort away once again to think up another plot to attack. Personally I enjoyed his visit. As short as it was I feel it was a complete success. At least the stupid trio got injured. Someone even died. I thought that was cool. The only thing that sucked is that it wasn't a griffindor. It was the stupid ravenclaw that Potter fancied, Cho Chang. She got in Voldemort's way and he killed her. It was great! The Lord called down the dementors to help him, but that Potter, oh he knew how to get them to leave. I forgot about his strong patronus. Him and his damn 'EXPECTO PATRONOUS!' pisses me off so much. Why can't he just let the damn things consume him? Take him from this earth and into the depths of the never ending oblivion of hell. That would be interesting. At least he wouldn't be able to be the stupid hero anymore.

Looking out the window I notice how everything has changed around me. People are different. I'm different. Nothing will ever be the same. Potter and Granger are together. Weasley and that Parvati girl are together and that ANNOYING Pansy Parkinson STILL continues to stalk me like a crazy rapist. She can't understand what 'I DON'T LIKE YOU' means. Crabbe and Goyle envy me like idiots because they seem to think that I'm the greatest person alive, what a joke that is. I'll never be able to have the normal life that everybody else has. I'll always be the shadow in the distance watching while people live their lives and grow into what they've always wanted to become. I use to know what I wanted to be, but my dream is long gone.

Sometimes I get the feeling that I'm an unwanted person within not only this school, but this earth as well. It seems as if someone is trying to kill me. I always seem to pull out of it though. As if someone's teasing me with the chance of death. It could be some sign that someone is coming to help me, or hurt me. Either way I'll find some way to be ready. I always am. It's just I'm not sure if I want to be ready. Should I just let them take me? Let myself go and drop all my problems? It would be the easiest way out I will say that, but should I take the risk? Nobody would miss me if I was gone. Draco Malfoy, what a name. Nobody knows me as anymore, but the famous pureblood son of Lucious. I'm ment to walk in my father's step. Continue the legacy of Malfoy's for years to come. With my pushy arrogant father and strict self explanitory mother, how would I get a chance to achieve anything of my nature? Such a pushy and exploited life I've lived. Nobody has dared to look into the real me. It's been coming out more lately. The depressed lonely Malfoy that no one has ever seen before. Looking for someone to help recover from this never ending pain and suffering of what you people call life. That's how I live each day. Wandering around searching for someone who can actually understand how I feel, but nobody will EVER understand.

I'm trying to find a way to let everybody down easy, so I've finally decided it. From this ledge I'll let it all go. My problems, my parents, my school, my pierced disreguarded feelings, and most of all my love. Of course no one notices me, I'm just a lost soul drifting between heaven and hell, trying to decide where they're going to end up. Me, well I'm not sure where I'll end up after this. I haven't done many good things in my life. I've ruined other people to a point where they'll never be able to forgive me. Twisting minds and possesing poor helpless individuals use to be the highlight of my life. Nobody will talk to me and make me rethink this because the truth is, no one cares. Understanding isn't a possibility, even if someone TRIED to help me it would be no use and I would still end up where I am now. Looking over the edge I finally notice how high I actually am. Once I drop there is no possibility of survival. At least whoever is out to get me will get there wish. I'll be gone and they'll win. Thinking of the one person I've ever had any emotions for, I let a single tear slide down my cheek. The wind is blowing and now is my chance. With letter sealed and resting safely in my pocket I leap into the wind. Plumiting to the ground wasn't as bad as I had figured it would be. Maybe one day people will remember who I was. The Unwanted, unknown boy, who lived and took his life with one leap into the fierce wind.



A/N: So...what did you think? Was is ok? Did I actually write a pretty good HP story thingy? I'm thinking of continuing with other pple. You kno like a suicidal story type thing where people die and stuff. Maybe not. I think I'm just crazy. .! Anyway, could you do me one SIMPLE favor? Click on the pretty little button that says 'Go' on it and leave me something? Hopefully something nice. =D