Author's Notes: And now for something completely different . . . a very short, one-shot ficlet based on the TV show "Cheers."

Disclaimer: I didn't create the show, I own no part of it, and I most certainly did not get paid for this.

Her One and Only

Diane Chambers sighed dreamily. She was with the man she loved, taking a romantic ride in a horse-drawn carriage through the streets of Boston under a blanket of stars. She knew her man loved her, too. They were perfect for one another, and the evening had been perfectly wonderful.

The couple had just been to see one of her favorite operas, The Mikado. Going to the opera was not something that her beaux did with ease. He was what she kindly referred to as one of Boston's "culturally challenged"; in fact, he was practically their poster child. Yet it did give him a chance to brush off his tuxedo, which he hadn't worn in years. And since his angel loved the opera, he was willing to sit through it, if only to please her. Knowing full well what he would say, she felt safe in asking for his opinion. "Well? What did you think of the opera?"

He said with a nod, "It was good. Rather better than I expected. I actually got some of the funny parts. Didn't you hear me laughing?"

She smiled and nodded back. "Yes, I did, darling. I'm so glad you enjoyed it."

It was mere chance that they had gone to the opera at all. When her editor canceled their dinner engagement, she quickly swooped down on two tickets to the opera on "rush" (also known as stand-by). Laughing, she had said, "I haven't bought tickets on rush in years! I feel like a college student!"

"Diane, you'll always be a college student," he said knowingly. "If you ever stop going to Boston College, it will be forced to close its doors."

She realized that he was probably right and said with a sheepish grin, "Well, of course, I am. I meant a very young student, that's all."

After the show, they had visted a fabulous new French restaurant that all the critics had simply raved about. It was a cozy hideaway tucked away from the crowds yet right in the heart of town. The customers, if they were able to, were requested to speak to the wait staff only in French. It appealed to her flair for the elegant.

The dinner reservations were actually made by her editor, Jean-Claude. He was supposed to meet with her to discuss some proposed changes to her latest manuscript. However, the poor man had to unexpectedly fill in for his boss at a charity event. It was simply unavoidable, so Diane found herself the lucky recipient of the highly-coveted reservations for two. She knew who she would have dinner with instead of that pompous French-Canadian windbag.

During the meal, she had talked -- at great length -- about her earnest yet failed attempt to actually complete a second book. While her first one had earned her accolades, it had the dubious honor of having the longest manuscript her editor had ever received. Jean-Claude had said the publisher was hesitant to accept another, and he had suggested that she try to save a rainforest or two by not printing the work in its entirety and just sending it to him electronically. Diane smiled to herself; the poor man probably had a valid point.

When the bill for dinner had arrived, her boyfriend remarked that it was two for one. She took the bill from his hand and scoffed, "Surely not!"

"Oh, yes it is," he replied. "Two prices for one meal." She giggled at his simple joke. With his limited intellect, how was it he could always make her laugh? Maybe it was because she felt so very giddy, so expectant tonight.

The carriage ride continued, the couple sitting together in comfortable silence as they admired the stars, the sights, and each other. She asked, "So tell me, what's happened since I left Cheers? Does Norm still have his same old barstool?"

"Who?" he asked. When she slugged his arm and giggled again, he said, "Yea, Norm is still there."

"I see," she said with a wistful smile. "And what about Woody? How is he doing?"

"Oh, I meant to tell you. Woody got married to Kelly Gaines. You may not have ever met her. Her father is one of Boston's elite. She's cute, but dingy as a bell. So I guess they fit together anyway. And Woody just got elected to the city council, and I hear they've got a little Boyd on the way."

"What?!" she asked, astounded. Then she chuckled softly. "Looks like the boy from Hanover transitioned to the son-in-law of a millionaire rather quickly. Well, good for him. It couldn't happen to a nicer guy." She'd always liked Woody.

The evening was an absolute dream. An unlikely dream for the only former 'Miss Boston Barmaid' to become an author, yet one she hated to see end. The carriage ride over, they took a taxi back to where they had met: the steps that lead down to her old place of employment. The driver stopped, and they got out.

Before they went downstairs to enter Cheers, they gazed into one another's eyes lovingly and caressed one another's hands and faces. They had had such a glorious time tonight. Who would have thought that after all this time apart they would still have so much to say to one another, feel so at ease in each others' company, feel so right in one another's arms? At last, another date with the man she had always admired. It was as if no time had ever passed between.

Then he stunned her by kneeling on the sidewalk in front of her and withdrawing a tiny box from his jacket pocket. Inside was a diamond ring, carefully chosen just for her. He began nervously, "Diane." He hedged a moment longer, then finished quickly, "Will you please do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

She was flabbergasted. She had not seen this coming, not in a million years. With tears in her eyes, she said, "Of course, I will, my darling. I love you, Clifford."

THE END

Afterthoughts: Hey, I just write 'em as I see 'em. I just thought it would be interesting, because when you think about it, one is just as pompous as the other. They'd probably get along just fine. Also, I don't know if last-minute, standby tickets for operas are called "rush", but we used to get them for the theatre all the time in our college days back when we were poor. They were about half-price, so they were ideal for struggling students.

You may recall that Diane and Cliff did actually have one date. It was some formal event for the Post Office, and they double-dated with Carla. Ms. Tortelli tells Cliff that Diane really likes him. He sings "Misty" to her as he rubs Diane's arm with one of his fingers; all the while, Carla is laughing her head off in the backseat. (Shelley Long's face is priceless!)

Please review! And to Hanniballover1181, my "one and only" reviewer for this story so far: Just because I wrote this doesn't mean I think Cliff and Diane would have ever hooked up. I just think it would have been funny if they had. Actually, I thought Sam and Rebecca stood the best chance of being a long-term couple. She's even shallower than he is! :-D