SETTING: The That 70's Show kitchen (AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a little more dysfunctional and a little more realistic to believe)
CAST
Red Forman Craig Manning
Kitty Forman Sammy Thomas
Eric Forman Gabriel Thomas
Laurie Forman Julia Thomas-Manning
CRAIG: (he looks a lot like Red Forman in this scene) So. (puts something in his mouth) What happened in school today?
[camera turns to GABRIEL]
GABRIEL: Nothing. (pokes at food) As usual.
[camera turns back to CRAIG]
CRAIG: Julia?
[camera turns to JULIA]
JULIA: (shakes her head) Nothing, Daddy. (giggles)
[camera turns to SAMMY]
SAMMY: (she has her hair fixed like Kitty's) Well, Craig, what happened at work today?
[camera turns to CRAIG]
CRAIG: Nothing.
[camera turns back to SAMMY]
SAMMY: Oh.
[camera turns to GABRIEL]
GABRIEL: So, Julia, who did you do today?
[camera turns to JULIA]
JULIA: (glares at GABRIEL) What are you talking about?
[camera turns back to GABRIEL]
GABRIEL: (grins) Oh, you know what I'm talking about.
[camera turns to SAMMY]
SAMMY: Will you two be nice to each other?
[camera turns to JULIA]
JULIA: (sweetly) Sorry, Mom.
[camera turns to GABRIEL]
GABRIEL: Sorry, Mom.
[camera turns to CRAIG]
CRAIG: Yeah, Gabriel, be nice to your sister.
[camera turns to GABRIEL]
GABRIEL: I said I was sorry.
[CRAIG'S hand smacks him upside the head]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Wait a minute!" Marco exclaimed. "This story is as unbelievable as Spinner's. Craig would never hit Gabe."
"Yeah," Craig said. "Why am I bald?"
"Because Joey is," Jimmy said. (AUTHOR'S NOTE: Haven't you noticed that whatever Joey did, Craig is doing, too. And Craig isn't even Joey's biological son. *shrugs* so who knows, Craig might be bald, too.)
"Doesn't mean I am," Craig replied. "And my daughter's not going to have sex with anyone until she's married!"
"How sure of that can you be?" Spinner asked.
"Because, I'm going to lock her in her room and put bars on the windows!"
Marco smiled. "I just thought of one."
"Shoot," Craig said.
"Ok…here goes."