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The letter was short and straight to the point. Sirius wouldn't come. Not with Death Eaters following him and Remus to every part of England they could flee to. They weren't save to remain in one place and the Order of the Phoenix could not provide them with a secure hideout that was not Hogwarts itself. And Sirius, as much as Remus, had refused it explaining that they could take care of themselves.
Harry was heart broken by the news. Now more than ever he had wanted Sirius to be close to him and help him. Things had started to get out of Harry's hands and he would really appreciate a little guidance from an adult that was part of his family and did no want him dead.
Yet Harry was aware that telling Sirius of his current problems was not a very bright idea. It would be nothing more than a selfish and childish behavior by making the other worry for something that he couldn't change anyway and in the worst case, he could lead his godfather into trouble by asking him to come here.
So in the end he had to handle it all by himself.
He glanced up to the window in the library watching the dark cloud come closer. Soon it would rain.
Ron asked him something and Harry answered mechanically not bothering to turn around until a hand reached out for his arm and he reflexively slapped it away. Starring wide eyes at his friend for a moment Harry starred ashamed away apologizing before gathering his things together and fleeing the closeness of all these people around him.
Lately it had been suffocating. All these students, all this noise… Everything gave him a headache, everything stirred a nerve and he sometimes could react rather uncharacteristically. He could only thank Draco for getting him out of a few very distraught situations to which he otherwise would have had to come up with a really annoying and complicated explanation.
Another thing that was nagging on him was, that Draco had gone two days ago to see Voldemort and the Slytherin had not said a word about their conversation since then. Harry wasn't entirely sure whether he hoped that Riddle had told his cousin everything or, if it would be better of with Draco not knowing all the details of his encounter with the Dark Lord and Snape. The Slytherin could be very irritated when it came to thing that involved his father and so Harry wasn't very keen on finding out what he would think if he was told that his father had caused a chain reaction by interfering in Tom's betrayal towards him, that had finally caused Harry to get, roughly said: 'laid'. So he really hoped that latter had not yet occurred.
Nonetheless, Harry had been unable to sit still unknowing and had send off a letter with Draco's owl asking Riddle about the context of his conversation with the blond. Needless to say was that the waiting was straining his already nagging nerves.
Harry came to a halt as he realized that he had drifted from his course to his dorm and had ended up going down to the dungeon without realizing it. Sighing he turned around, but bumped into a taller figure. Loosing balance he stumbled back and let his book and scrolls fall to the ground. He would surely have followed hadn't he been caught by his arm.
"What are you doing down here?"
The hand on Harry's arm loosened and he looked thankfully at Draco. "Would you believe it if I told you I don't know?"
Draco shrugged tugging his hands in his pockets. "Considering everything…" he paused looking meaningfully at his cousin. " Yes…" His eyes scanned quickly the area they were in before he proceeded leaving Harry standing were he was.
"Malfoy!"
Draco turned his head back, his darker rings under his eyes showed the lack of sleep he must have had the last days.
"What did he tell you?" Harry asked trying hard to remain calm and focused.
The pale eyes looked at him for a long time before speaking up again. "I would rather like to know what you didn't tell me."
Harry looked away ashamed pushing with his hand his hair back before kneeling down to the ground and gathering his things. "Nothing you need to worry about…"
In a few quick steps Draco was next to him and pulled him up by his cloak and pushed him against the wall. "Damn it, Harry!" he hissed his name furiously and Harry knew how serious Draco was about this. "If you don't talk I can't help. If you don't trust me a little, then why do we bother with this whole façade? I hate being misled! And you know why? Because my father is a freaking bastard who doesn't trust even himself! And I have lived my whole life trying to decipher people's behavior. I'm tiered of that! I don't understand what's going on, or what I am not being told, but it's clear to me that Riddle did something else to you that you aren't telling me." The grip on Harry's clothing tightened. "I'm not stupid and nor is he. If he let you return then only because you are of no further value to my father to give the House of Slytherin an heir, you being the last female pureblood that is not already bound by the Curse to her partner." He pulled Harry closer to him and for a moment he was afraid of this boy that up until now had supported him greatly. "What did you not tell me?!"
"Malfoy! Potter!!"
Both their heads turned alarmed to the source of the voice and Draco immediately let go of Harry as he recognized Professor McGonagall and Professor Snape standing at the end of the corridor.
"Now you've got in trouble." Harry murmured, realizing the next moment that this would lead to another long chat later, which he didn't want to have.
"What's the meaning of this?" Professor McGonagall asked eying them with narrowed eyes suspiciously.
Harry sighed mentally and he saw Draco roll his eyes in annoyance next to him.
"We were just having a little conversation, Professor." Draco growled.
"That certainly didn't look like a simply conversation, Mr. Malfoy!" she said back to him.
"Minerva!" Snape interrupted her from continuing. "I think we should let them both give us a very long explanation without interrupting them."
"Malfoy is saying the truth, Professor." Harry said avoiding Snape's eyes and focusing entirely on his Head of House. We were just having a little divergence d'opinion."
"You know French?" Draco turned surprised to him.
"…" Harry blinked at him. "Err… Well… Yes, I started learning it a while back…" He gave Draco a meaningful look to drop the matter.
"Right…" Draco said before turning to the two professors. "Well, since I cleared my problem with Potter already, I will be leaving."
Harry nodded quickly in agreement. "Yes, me too." And both hurried out of sight.
Minerva turned to Severus with a glare. "I insist that this school lacks some serious conversations! And you and your House are the source of all this!!"
Severus rolled his eyes imitating Draco's earlier action. "I will be in my office if there are any serious matters you need to discuss with me."
"Why is it that no one listens to me?" she sighed.
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The days passed and Harry's life returned almost back to normal. Riddle had finally answered his letter assuring that he had not told Draco more than he had already known from the start. Draco had calmed down and stopped inquiring more about the night at Voldemort's, but insisted on keeping his research on the spell his parent's had put on him. It appeared that Riddle had talked to him and diminished some of Draco's worries, although Harry wasn't sure about the details of their conversation.
Also the blond had done as promised and had indeed blackmailed the Minister of Education threatening the man of the consequences it would have if he let it out into public let alone told Lucius Malfoy of what his son was doing. Knowing far too well the influences that the Malfoy family had, the man had willingly agreed, as long as Draco and Harry could prove grades above the average. In other words they had a lot of studying to do trying to get two years worth of information into their heads in only eight month.
After the seventh nightly study session with his cousin Harry was starting to appreciate the uncommon knowledge that dwelled inside his head.
"No, Draco, they didn't storm Versailles! " Harry sighed frustrated as Draco tried to summarize the events of the French Revolution at 1 am out loud. "It was the Bastille."
The Slytherin pulled annoyed at his hair letting his head rest on the countless open books spread all over the table. They were currently in one of the empty rooms they had found with help of the Marauder's Map. "I can't anymore! I don't know how you can memorize all this stuff just like nothing."
Harry laughed bitterly. "It's not like I could help it to pop up to me as though I had already studied it and was only freshen up my memory now."
Draco glared at him. "It's unfair I have to put so much work into it and you don't. I mean we still have to go over so much and I can't seem to see any end coming. Besides next Hogsmead weekend will be having our first History exam. Maybe I should go down into the Chamber as well."
Harry glared at him. "Don't joke around like that! You know what would happen to you. It's already bad enough that I have hallucinations and this nutty knowledge. I can assure you, loosing yourself completely to another wizard cannot be amusing!"
"Touchy, aren't we." Draco commented as he leaned back and gave him a smug smile.
Harry rolled his eye. "Tired would be the word I would have chosen. We have been up this whole week till late and I can only marble our resistance as not to fall asleep, especially in History of Magic."
Draco grinned. "Ever heard of disguising charms, Potter?"
A gapping mouth was the reply he got before Harry gathered his wits again. "The snoring was you?!"
Laughter filled the room. "I can't believe you didn't come up with something as easy like that."
Pouting Harry stuck his tongue out at him. "It's not like Ron wouldn't notice when I sit next to him."
"Gryffindors! Problems you have." Draco said yawning. "Smack Weasel and he'll keep quiet."
Harry gave him a look of disprovable, which Draco dismissed by waving with a hand at him and standing up. "Let's stop for tonight and go to bed. Tomorrow might be Saturday, but I still intend to sleep more than usually."
Harry nodded while gathering his Invisibility cloak and getting up to join Draco at the door and letting his cousin hide underneath as well.
"Rising sun." Draco spoke and it took a moment before the statue reacted at his word. They knew that it's other half on the other side of the door send out a slight magic wave checking for anyone outside the room. Once the statue above the door raised its head from the door, they stepped outside into the dark corridors of Hogwarts while the door closed silently after them. It was clear that there was no one close by to bother them.
"Dwelling sunset." Harry spoke to the door and they heard the clicking of the locks and protective statue behind the door moving back into place.
"I'll take you down to the dungeon." Harry said as he tugged the map out of his sleeve.
"So very grateful for your generosity, my dear cousin." Draco yawned as they headed quickly down to the dungeons.
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Severus knew there was something wrong. The annoying gnawing sensation of irritation that accompanied his usual sixth sense for trouble, had been drilling violently inside his head for weeks now and he was starting to feel unpleasantly disturbed by its presence. He couldn't pinpoint was it was trying to tell him, all he was sure of, was that every time that Harry Potter passed the doorway into his classroom, the irritation would turn into a headache almost screaming to him that it was that boy who had some connection to what exactly was going on.
He remembered the way the boy had felt as he had launched himself into his arms in the infirmary as though he was holding on for his dear life onto Severus, expecting to hold him from falling away into some bitter and lonely darkness that had him in such a state of mind that he felt threatened by everybody but somehow not by his dreaded Potion Master. This thought always lead him then to they night in Voldemort's mansion. Back then he had also felt called and pulled towards the boy by some unknown magic. It was frustrating to admit, but true. Every time he just stepped closer to Harry Potter, his senses felt numbed and he could feel the tugging of the boy's magic lulling him forward to hold the child. It was unnerving him and the force of self-control he had to put up to fight back was tremendous that he feared getting any closer than necessary. Short, he was avoiding Potter as much as the boy was obviously avoiding him.
This little fact had crept upon him as Potter started to attend classes normally again. The boy made no sound of protest or allowed himself to be taunted by any other than Draco Malfoy in his presence. He didn't look at his teacher when spoken to, and the few times Severus had gotten over his own fear of losing his self-control and had asked the boy to stay behind to have a word, his friends and curiously sometimes even Malfoy would be lurking around making sure he wasn't alone with anyone. Otherwise the boy hushed so fast out of the classroom that one might think he was being pursued by a Dementor, if not worse. To top it all, he couldn't give the boy any kind of detention to have at least a short talk about what had happened back then in the infirmary and at the mansion. Pomfrey had convinced Albus to let the young Gryffindor adjust by his own measure back into his normal life without troubling him with detention. Delicacy had been asked of him and Severus wasn't sure whether he was glad to have an excuse to delay the conversation and lighten the tension that obviously lay between the two of them.
From what he had heard from the headmaster, Potter had only told them part of the story, just about the summoning and his oh-so-lucky-escape. More worried about his state of mind, Madam Pomfrey had also advised to not push the matter further than necessary and that such was the best for the boy right now.
All that did not help for Severus not to notice the dark rings under the boy's eyes that were starting to get more and more visible to him, even if Potter tried hard to disguise them under spells. Severus was used to some of his Slytherin behaving like this, but it was rather unusual for a Gryffindor to display a patter of behavior he was only used to see in the other houses but that of Minerva. She usually had everything that concerned her student very good under control and they had trust in her advices and the help she would willingly give them. She was very protective of her students. Which made Potter's case more interesting and unwilling to leave his mind.
Then there were also the rumors that he had started to hear from the other students. The talking about Potter looking sometimes completely out of place and then coming up with answers that simply shouldn't come out of a boy of his age. Flitwick had even said that if he didn't know better, Potter was starting to lack magic potential when performing spells in class but otherwise when it came to analyses or homework as well as explanations on certain subjects, he was showing more potential than Granger. Also, he had encountered the boy more often in the library than he remember ever seeing him in the last years. Rationally thinking, the behavior he was showing was normal considering what the boy had gone through. He was trying to keep his mind occupied in order for him not to think of his problems. That alone was a problem itself; because Potter couldn't very well keep evading the truth more than Severus could stop being his usual cold and annoying self.
Least but not last, there was the matter with Malfoy. Severus had seen him and Potter more often together than the two were probably aware of and seeing them interact out of his hiding, he was sure there was more than just rivalry between them as well as the hate they displayed in public. Although the encounter he and Minerva had witnessed a few days ago in the hallway countered part of his analysis. Still in Severus' impression, there seemed to be a truce, as not to call it friendship, between the two boys. Draco was acting almost protective when the other Slytherins were onto the Gryffindor. He would intervene pretending to get into the fight and then he and Potter would make up a show of insults threatening each other with their wands until a prefect or another teacher came by to separate them.
Now that the two also sat together in class, Severus had even more chances to get a closer look at their behavior, although he was strictly against getting anymore involved with Potter's problems than necessary. He had told the headmaster strictly to keep the business of his Golden Boy away from the Potion Master as far as possible. But when it came to a Malfoy getting their hands into something as delicate as Dumbledore's plans, Severus was forced to admit that he had to figure out what exactly was going on and how much he really knew of the situation. One thing was sure though, Severus knew more than Albus was aware off…
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He was sitting under the hot water of the shower, with his arms around his legs, his head resting on his knees. His skin had already turned red from the heat, but this was the only way he would end up feeling refreshed and clean. The prickling sensation on his body allowed his muscles to relax and for a short moment he could think without fearing someone to see him this vulnerable.
For a moment he was back to being just Harry Potter, a boy with seriously too much problems compared to other teenagers his age. For a moment the thought, that his friends might wonder where he was off to again, crossed his mind, but the heat and steam around him dulled it away as quickly as it had popped up. Right now he didn't care if he would see them ever again, he was sick of hearing the murmurs behind his back, the whispering of grudges and rumors that cruised around the school.
He leaned his head back; eyes closed and let the water plash his face. Christmas season was approaching and Sirius had still not made it as he had promised Harry in another of his letter. He was still somewhere out there hiding from Voldemort and his Death Eaters. Another reason to be annoyed; his godfather was ignoring him, other people used him and he was mentally more bruised now than ever in the past. The images that came to his mind were getting more and more, his powers were almost non-existent, and at nights there were only nightmares that trapped his body immobile. He would awake sweating from the sheer strength and violent intend of somehow ordering his body to return him into consciousness.
They were all wrong with their talk about him being a little more than paranoid and sensible at the time being. His friends tried to reason with him, but in his eyes he was only seeing immature children fooling around, even Draco was sometimes more than he wanted to handle. But that might have more to do with the fact that Draco was painfully reminding him more and more of the man in his hallucinations. He would insult the Slytherin loosing his temper easily, and then the next instant Harry would be apologizing, because he knew that's just not what friends are for. He couldn't simply let his bad mood out on anyone that crossed his path.
He had to move on out of this stage of imprisonment. He understood clearly now how Tom Riddle must feel trapped by his weaknesses under Lucius Malfoy's control the same way Harry was under the Curse's.
Salazar's heirs are known by their abilities. Even if you hadn't opened the Chamber yourself, it would have recognized you as possible heir. You must figure out what knowledge, power or trace it left on you.
Tom's voice echoed in his mind as he replayed the memory. Well, he had felt no particular difference back then, no super-knowledge, no power, no mark…
It might be triggered by something. I don't know, but be careful for when it happens…
Harry lowered his head and stretched his right arm to look at it. There was the pale shade of a snake form on his lower arm and wrist.
If you happen to be his full reincarnation, he might sooner or later take over your mind.
He smiled a rather insane, sad smile. That explained so much and yet not enough... The people who weren't really there but that he still could see, things he simply knew he shouldn't know, the reason for when he entered some rooms they looked different for a second… But that did not explain the magic pull he felt toward Snape ever since he had returned from the mansion…
You cannot allow Salazar to take over!!
Like he knew how to do otherwise…
The snake on his wrist moved. Harry's face tightened painfully, it was though it was trying to rip his skin, trying to shape it off.
"Can't you tell me how I'll know?"
"I don't know, maybe your behavior will start changing or you start talking in odd ways with the old accent…"
And he had done that various times, catching not only Hermione's curiosity.
"Can't that be stopped?"
"The only thing that might do so would probably be in the chamber itself."
"Great! Like I care to absorb an old spirit in my mind!!"
Harry sighed. Seemed like he had no choice, but find the Chamber again and reopen it…
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Draco glanced out of the window into the dark and rainy clouds outside as he sat at the library trying to get the some Animagus and Transmutation dates into his head, but to no avail. The reason for it was pretty simple and consisted of a name. Tom Riddle, to be more exact.
Ever since he had talked again to the Dark Lord a few days ago, informing him of Harry's current state of behavior as well as to ask for some kind of advices to help his cousin cope with the lack of magic and apparent hormonal disorder, Draco couldn't find a way to focus his thoughts, he knew for sure that both Harry and Tom were hiding something from him, but at the current moment it didn't seem of more importance than stopping Harry from bursting into anger without as much of a reason every now and then. The trigger didn't even have to be something big and Harry would sometimes even react violently. He recalled too well Goyle ending up with a broken nose a week ago.
What bothered him above all were Tom words. The only help they could probably get would be in the Chamber of Secrets. Draco was not suicidal but he was aware that a certain Gryffindor didn't seem to have any problems with the idea recently.
He passed his hand over the cold surface of the glass window concentrating on the sound of the rain against it. It was as though he could feel it against his own skin. Almost feel it… there was just a small barrier between him and the water outside.
He shook his head trying to focus back on his studies. He and Harry might have passed two exams already, but there were still plenty to come and the Minister of Education was expecting them to achieve excellent results in all the subjects they needed to graduate. The pressure was there and he could feel it pressing him sometimes down so hard that he didn't even know why he was even bothering doing his father's bidding. It might simply be the fact to prove himself in the eyes of the older man, but he also felt the nagging annoyance of a child wanting to go against his parent. Those two sides of him stood in constant conflict, which is why he had bothered to help Harry and Tom out in the first place. He wanted to piss off his father, knowing better than probably anyone else what the consequences would be. A soft laugh escaped his lips. No, he was wrong assuming he knew his father's quirks; those were more in Tom's expertise.
He reached into the pocket of his pants and pulled out a folded paper, reading once again the spell that the Potters had performed on Harry. He still had much difficulties finding out much about the source and counters of the spell. Although Harry had assured that Tom had very well been able to cast the spell, neither he nor Draco dared to use it again, especially not with Harry in such a vulnerable state of power.
What Draco needed now was more time. More time to think, to research, to study and above all to find out the secret that Harry and Tom beheld. It must be of importance somehow, because lately Harry was evading the point of revealing it in such a sly way that Draco had to wonder whether it was really his cousin manipulating their conversations or … or… or the Slytherin within.
He let his thoughts wander for a moment back to his studies only ending up wondering what to do about Harry's obvious rising fear and frustration about his hallucinations. He knew that he was reminding Harry of something that he had seen. His cousin's reactions to him were obvious on that, but at the same time he could sense the inner struggle the other beheld to not let Draco see how much in pain and confusion he indeed was in.
"The fear inside, it tries to surface and consume my very soul." Harry had once said after he had gotten over an intense hallucination that had lasted over an hour during one of their study lessons. The Gryffindor had been completely unaware of his surroundings and Draco himself had felt a little panicked at the display before him. But most of all, he been scared of the empty and glassy look in the other boys eyes as they caught sight and somehow recognition of him before Harry had collapsed trembling out of his seat and into Draco's arms.
"Do you need that book much longer, Malfoy?"
Draco turned startled to his cousin looking rather displeased having to direct a word to him. Draco sighed mentally but put on his known cold smile. "Why, Potter, I didn't know you knew, let alone, had ever seen a book in your life. How did you find your way here? Did you get lost in the lower parts of the castle?"
The students sitting nearby suppressed their laughter as they turned with interest to watch the scene.
Harry crossed his arms rolling his eyes. "I'm in no mood to fight you, Malfoy, so I will ignore the fact that someone bothered to familiarize you with our common speech and language in order for you to communicate your lousing and uninteresting opinion." Harry smirked at him. "And since the book your holding is the only exemplar in the library, I just wanted to know whether you would dignify yourself into not monopolizing it, so that the rest of the student body might use it as well and we can go on with our studies without having to fancy your drooling looks towards a piece of literature."
Draco just starred at him. Had Harry just talked back to him in a snape-ish sort of way? It took a moment for him to gather his thought back together and realize that Harry had probably not meant it they way it had sounded.
"Potter, if there is one who's drooling, it would be you. Your whole manner is just screaming at us that either you're bedding a Slytherin or you just decided to change sides." He closed the book calmly and lay it on the table, before getting up from his seat and leaving, barely seeing Harry's shocked impression. Had he gone too far? No, he had only returned the argument as they usually did, but somehow the way the other students were looking at him as he passed and the look on Harry's face a few moments earlier, told him that maybe, just maybe, he might have overdone it.
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You are wrong…
The man is starting to have a voice now, I can hear its almost inaudible sound resonating in my ears as the air that fills my lungs is getting harder and harder to control.
You are so wrong…
I still struggle against this imprisonment, but the thin strings that once held me are getting thicker and thicker, almost like they were alive. Hissing sounds beneath the surface of a rising darkness.
I'm sick of this; I want it over with because fear has consumed my being even when I do not sleep. I cannot control this much longer. I've got to admit that maybe I have reached a stage where it's time to move on.
Yet I plea inside: Don't make me loose my grip on everything I've known all along…
For me you are so wrong…
I'm scared now…I'm scared as hell that he'll figure me out and all I can think is that I want to shout… Shout at the top off my lungs. But if someone hears me they'll come rushing in …
Questions are more fearful than resisting after all…
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TBC in Chapter 09
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