Chapter 8
When I woke up the next morning,I was in a bed with Trowa by my side. "Trowa? Is it actually you."
He smiled and kissed me. "How are you feeling?"
"A lot better thank you. Is it really over?"
"Yes it is,"he hugged me.
"Oh thank god."
"Are you ok?"
"Yes. How long was I asleep?"
"For only a day."
"Good. It felt like a week."
"You were doing great at the hospital,so I decided to bring you home."
"I'm so glad you did."
"Well,I'm glad I did too."
"How is everyone doing?"
"Good. Quatre sent you a few things."
I smiled as I looked at the cards and the flowers that Quatre had brought me. "Tell him I said thank you."
"Well,I'll try. He's been very busy lately."
"I bet."
"God I'm so happy you're alive."
"I'm happy your alive. I was so worried about you."
"I was worried about you."
"It wasn't that bad you know."
"Nicole.please don't."
I sighed. I'm sorry."
"It's ok. Listen,I need to tell you something."
"Yes?"
"Quatre wants to send all our gundams into outerspace. He doesn't want anything to happen to us."
I couldn't believe this. And after all I had been throught with Nanashi,I was going to have to say goodbye to my loyal companion. "Trowa."
"You have a couple of days to think about it."
"I couldn't never be parted from Nanashi."
"It's for the best though."
I shook my head. "I wouldn't be able to put up with it."
"Just think about it ok?"
"I'll try too."
"Ok. Well,I'll try to."
"Thank you,"and he kissed me.
"Trowa?"
"Yes?"
"I'm so sorry."
"About what?"
"About wanting to stay. I shouldn't've put up a fuss about wanting to stay and fight with you."
He smiled. "You love me and you care about me. That's why you wanted to stay. You didn't want me to get hurt."
"You know me to well."
"I have to. That's why I love you. It's ok."
"But still."
"It's ok. You were just trying to protect me. And I thank you for that."
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For understanding."
"Well,that's the reason why I'm here."
Clown
Tsumetaku
Kooritsuita tsuki no kakera ga
Furisosogu you ni
Hitori no yoru ga ochite kuru
Namida to
Egao no kamen ni kakusareta
Hontou no kokoro wa itsushika
Dokoka ni okisari de
Light no naka de enjiteru
Nakushita hazu no yorokobi wo
Wasureta hazu no kanashimi wo
Kodoku wo enjitsuzuketeru
Tatoeba yume ni tsukarete mo
Uragirareta ai demo
Kokoro wa kuuhaku no mama de
Omoide sae mo nokosezu
Mitsumeru dake no doukeshi.
Mousugu
Light wo abite aruite yuku
Itsuwari wo daite
Kon'ya mo curtain wa agaru
Namida to
Egao no kage ni tatazunderu
Hontou no kokoro wa jibun wo
Nuritsubushiteru dake
Nagai jikan wo enjiteru
Tokku ni suteta yorokobi wo
Tojikomete kita kanashimi wo
Tsukutta hohoemi ni nosete
Chiisana hitomi ga kagayaku
Kodomo-tachi no kansei
Tsukurimono wo shinjirareru
Sunao na kokoro no mae ni
Kamen wa kuzurete ochiru
Aisareru koto ni funare de
Aishikata mo shiranai
Tatta ichido no kagayaki de
Kokoro ni nani ka afureru
Namida wo shitta doukeshi.
Namida wo shitta doukeshi.
(translation per line)
It's so cold
I'm getting frozen in the moon's embrace ---
And so it's all pouring down on me.
All alone in the night that just draws closer and closer.
And this tear.
It's always hidden in this smiling mask.
But there's still that painful truth in my heart ---
Left somewhere there.
And while performing in the middle of the light,
I'm just supposed to feel nothing but happiness.
I'm just supposed to leave behind all my sadness.
I feel loneliness --- but the show must still go on.
I could get tired but not forget such things as dreams
I could never bring myself to disappoint one's love.
And although my heart still remains in this emptiness,
I can never leave behind my memories.
Learn all you can about that clown.
And once again,
I'm walking away from the spotlight
Embracing only these pretensions.
Yet tonight, this curtain would still rise.
And this tear.
Always stopping short within the shadows of a smile.
But that painful truth in my heart is only mine ---
I'm only crushed, then painted, then. nothing more.
And while playacting for such a drag of time,
There is that happiness abandoned.
Using the sadness locked up deep within me,
I now create that smile on my face.
And those small eyes would surely shine
the innocence of children.
And I'll be building now what I believe in
Gently with the spirit right infront of me.
Let the mask fall off.
I'm never used to feeling that thing called love.
I'm never ever shown just what love is.
There is no more than once of that brightness for me ---
But my heart is overflowing with a strange something.
A clown also knows what a tear is.
A clown also knows what a tear is.
Time passed by. And every day I thought about how great it was that I was getting to spend this time with the love of my life. We thought about the wedding every day. Until finally,Christmas finally came. But the wedding would not take place on Christmas day. Because another war was going to start. And it started because Trieze's daughter wanted to star a war. She wanted to be just like her father.
When I woke up the next morning,I was in a bed with Trowa by my side. "Trowa? Is it actually you."
He smiled and kissed me. "How are you feeling?"
"A lot better thank you. Is it really over?"
"Yes it is,"he hugged me.
"Oh thank god."
"Are you ok?"
"Yes. How long was I asleep?"
"For only a day."
"Good. It felt like a week."
"You were doing great at the hospital,so I decided to bring you home."
"I'm so glad you did."
"Well,I'm glad I did too."
"How is everyone doing?"
"Good. Quatre sent you a few things."
I smiled as I looked at the cards and the flowers that Quatre had brought me. "Tell him I said thank you."
"Well,I'll try. He's been very busy lately."
"I bet."
"God I'm so happy you're alive."
"I'm happy your alive. I was so worried about you."
"I was worried about you."
"It wasn't that bad you know."
"Nicole.please don't."
I sighed. I'm sorry."
"It's ok. Listen,I need to tell you something."
"Yes?"
"Quatre wants to send all our gundams into outerspace. He doesn't want anything to happen to us."
I couldn't believe this. And after all I had been throught with Nanashi,I was going to have to say goodbye to my loyal companion. "Trowa."
"You have a couple of days to think about it."
"I couldn't never be parted from Nanashi."
"It's for the best though."
I shook my head. "I wouldn't be able to put up with it."
"Just think about it ok?"
"I'll try too."
"Ok. Well,I'll try to."
"Thank you,"and he kissed me.
"Trowa?"
"Yes?"
"I'm so sorry."
"About what?"
"About wanting to stay. I shouldn't've put up a fuss about wanting to stay and fight with you."
He smiled. "You love me and you care about me. That's why you wanted to stay. You didn't want me to get hurt."
"You know me to well."
"I have to. That's why I love you. It's ok."
"But still."
"It's ok. You were just trying to protect me. And I thank you for that."
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For understanding."
"Well,that's the reason why I'm here."
Clown
Tsumetaku
Kooritsuita tsuki no kakera ga
Furisosogu you ni
Hitori no yoru ga ochite kuru
Namida to
Egao no kamen ni kakusareta
Hontou no kokoro wa itsushika
Dokoka ni okisari de
Light no naka de enjiteru
Nakushita hazu no yorokobi wo
Wasureta hazu no kanashimi wo
Kodoku wo enjitsuzuketeru
Tatoeba yume ni tsukarete mo
Uragirareta ai demo
Kokoro wa kuuhaku no mama de
Omoide sae mo nokosezu
Mitsumeru dake no doukeshi.
Mousugu
Light wo abite aruite yuku
Itsuwari wo daite
Kon'ya mo curtain wa agaru
Namida to
Egao no kage ni tatazunderu
Hontou no kokoro wa jibun wo
Nuritsubushiteru dake
Nagai jikan wo enjiteru
Tokku ni suteta yorokobi wo
Tojikomete kita kanashimi wo
Tsukutta hohoemi ni nosete
Chiisana hitomi ga kagayaku
Kodomo-tachi no kansei
Tsukurimono wo shinjirareru
Sunao na kokoro no mae ni
Kamen wa kuzurete ochiru
Aisareru koto ni funare de
Aishikata mo shiranai
Tatta ichido no kagayaki de
Kokoro ni nani ka afureru
Namida wo shitta doukeshi.
Namida wo shitta doukeshi.
(translation per line)
It's so cold
I'm getting frozen in the moon's embrace ---
And so it's all pouring down on me.
All alone in the night that just draws closer and closer.
And this tear.
It's always hidden in this smiling mask.
But there's still that painful truth in my heart ---
Left somewhere there.
And while performing in the middle of the light,
I'm just supposed to feel nothing but happiness.
I'm just supposed to leave behind all my sadness.
I feel loneliness --- but the show must still go on.
I could get tired but not forget such things as dreams
I could never bring myself to disappoint one's love.
And although my heart still remains in this emptiness,
I can never leave behind my memories.
Learn all you can about that clown.
And once again,
I'm walking away from the spotlight
Embracing only these pretensions.
Yet tonight, this curtain would still rise.
And this tear.
Always stopping short within the shadows of a smile.
But that painful truth in my heart is only mine ---
I'm only crushed, then painted, then. nothing more.
And while playacting for such a drag of time,
There is that happiness abandoned.
Using the sadness locked up deep within me,
I now create that smile on my face.
And those small eyes would surely shine
the innocence of children.
And I'll be building now what I believe in
Gently with the spirit right infront of me.
Let the mask fall off.
I'm never used to feeling that thing called love.
I'm never ever shown just what love is.
There is no more than once of that brightness for me ---
But my heart is overflowing with a strange something.
A clown also knows what a tear is.
A clown also knows what a tear is.
Time passed by. And every day I thought about how great it was that I was getting to spend this time with the love of my life. We thought about the wedding every day. Until finally,Christmas finally came. But the wedding would not take place on Christmas day. Because another war was going to start. And it started because Trieze's daughter wanted to star a war. She wanted to be just like her father.