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ANNOUNCEMENT: A bit shorter, but I had to get this chapter out. WHOOHOO!! Only about... four or six chapters left, folks! We've made it near the end. Thanks for all the reviews, they've litterally kept me going. This is a hard fic to write merely because of the emotional content. It's quite draining, but for all who have been here since the beginning, thank you, everything's going to be alright.
Perfect Soldier 01 - Alrighty, here you go: the next chapter, fairly soon I think. Fujin and Seifer happy? Sounds about right dontcha think?
Kjata - Well, this chapter is also fairly short, but the ending of it felt right. Expect some Rajin in following chapters, we can't forget about him. And thanks for the compliments, I wish there was more I could write.
Riverwood - I am glad the chapters have hit you so emotionally, that's what I got from them. I try to make things as powerful as I can, otherwise why bother, eh? Your picture sounds amazing. I hope I get to see all of them soon. I kind of think I'm not the only one waiting to see them, ya know ;).
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Laguna paced the hall of the OR waiting for news on the young silver haired woman inside. Eventually a nurse came out holding a chart, passed it to the President, as he flipped it open, leaned away, looking up in the older man's eyes sadly. She saw him sigh deeply, run a hand through his greying hair and walk slowly to the room he left Seifer in, every step heavy and clinging, vibrating with the metal on his steel toed boots.
Stopping right up against the doorframe, Laguna turned away, leaning and sliding down all the way to the floor, trying somehow to muster up the courage to enter the room where he could hear the restless silence drifting under the door cracks. He couldn't do it. He couldn't walk into that room and flip open the clipboard, tell Seifer the contents... it wasn't right. They might have been on the wrong side, they might have fought for evil, but the more he thought about it, the more he watched Seifer and Fujin, the more he heard from Rajin's interrogation the more it looked like... he didn't know Hyne he didn't know! It was like they were being manipulated, and blackmailed, like the Sorceress used their love against them and now... he was only trying to save her and look what happened! Maybe that was how it was supposed to be, maybe everythings going to be alright, he could do something, they could prove the Posse's good nature, innocence... but that wouldn't help heal all wounds. Some were closed forever. Laguna bored holes in the floor by his feet, all the memories of Raine's death flooding into him, the brokeness, the pain, but then there was Squall. At least he had Squall, but he couldn't keep him, Squall didn't even know who he really was. As he was lost in the thoughts, Kiros came up and sat beside him,
"Everythings happening all over again"
"Yeah."
"We couldn't save everyone, that was never the deal"
"I know"
"He needs to know, Laguna"
"Yeah" Laguna answered, looking down further, just wanting someone to hold, flashing back to his first seeing baby Squall. Kiros paused, watching his friend's face intently, tracing every curve and wrinkle, he had been there when Laguna fell for Raine, he had watched them get married, take care of Ellone, he had been there when she whispered secret words in Laguna's ear, held his hand, he remembers seeing them fall asleep under the stars in the flower fields, calmly snuggled together holding on for all their worth. But it wasn't enough, she still died, Ellone was still taken, and there was nothing they could do. All he could do was watch Laguna cry, watch the mighty, yet foppish man break down, and here he was again, seventeen years later watching Laguna break over Seifer and Fujin, the two lovers of the age. Sure there was Squall and Rinoa, but they were never going to have it hard, their suffering was over, but Seifer and Fujin never ceased to suffer, they have never had a good time, just torment, and it came to Kiros that maybe that's why Rajin did what he did, maybe that was the reason for his sacrifice: to give Fujin and Seifer a chance. Just one chance to have a happy time, to end the horror that permiated everything in them, to raise them up and for them to live without pain, reguardless of what happened to him, he would die for them. What a sacrifice! Kiros was jostled in his musings with Laguna shifting, raising the clipboard to his view then tossing it aside, sending it skidding across the hallway floor.
"How, Kiros? How do I do it?"
"What would have helped the most? When it was you in there?"
Laguna sat silent for a minute, took a deep breath and looked up to see Kiros already standing over him,
"A hand for a friend." Kiros said, helping Laguna up off the floor.
"Thanks. I guess I should..."
"Yes, you should, and I should as well, I have someone who needs a companion" Kiros began walking toward the exit, as Laguna stared, turned, and entered the room. It was full of sunlight.
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Fujin driften into consicousness with an irritating beep beep beep constantly droning in her ears. The last thing she remembered was jolting awake with Seifer's mouth over hers, breathing deeply into her lungs, kissing her and whispering I love you's. She had allowed herself to sink back into unconsciousness after that, she knew Seifer would take care of her, and as she opened her eyes to see the grey ceil... HER EYES!
Fujin jostled forward, the beep on the monitor increasing fast, then fading back to a more normal pace as she blinked, and felt her left eye with her hands.
"I can... see?" Fujin said, grabbing her throat and feeling for the ever present scar that had hindered her words for so long. It wasn't there. . .
"Am I... in heaven?" she whispered, trying out her voice, gasping at the ease in speaking words. Slowly, she leaned her hand down along her body, something wasn't right, there was something she could not feel, before she could wrap her mind around it, she heard the voices of two medics outside her door,
"Sad, really. We were able to repair her eyes and many of the scars on her body, but we couldn't save the fetus."
"Poor thing, I wonder how they're going to break the news to her, that her child was miscarried"
"I heard President Loire is in with the father of the child right now, I heard he's trying to break it to him gently, something about losing his wife"
"I didn't know President Loire was married?"
"Yeah, died in childbirth. No one knows what happened to the kid though"
"Hey, my shift's over, fancy getting something to eat?"
"Yeah, sure. Marketplace sound good?"
Fujin toned the rest of the conversation out, gasping back tears as she felt her abdomen, noted the slight bruise left from surgery. She had to be strong, she had to be ready when Seifer came... but where's Rajin? He should be here she thought, the feeling of being completely alone overwhelming her, ripping across her face in a cascade of tears, gasps and sobs wrenching her from her relaxed position on her back to wrapping herself in the fetal position, her face looking to the window the nurses had covered with blinds. Outside she could hear baby birds chirping for their mother, but her repose was muted by a soft knocking on the door.
"Fuj... Fujin?" Seifer gulped, dropping his fist from the door, stepping inside and looking outside to where Laguna placed a fatherly hand on his shoulder, giving him a playful push towards his lover, then closing the door behind him. Alone, Seifer tried to call her name again, but the syllables ended in his throat as he heard her hushed sobs choking back tears. Rushing over, he leaned onto her bed, placing his hands on her shoulder and hair. Laguna had told him of her recovery, her eye and throat, but he also told him other things, horrible things, and as Seifer saw and felt Fujin's shoulders heave slightly as she tried to get control... it ripped him apart. Putting himself completely on the bed, he took the young broken woman in his arms, lifted her to him, cradling her securely, rocking back and forth slowly, gently whispering,
"Everything's going to be alright... shhh, Fujin, shhhh, there will be better times, other chances"
Fujin felt Seifer plant a kiss on her head, and she shut her eyes tight allowing him to rock her, to sing a soothing lullaby in her ears with the promises he spoke, as she sniffed, he brought her a tissue from the hospital table,
"Blow" Seifer said, as she blew her nose in the tissue and he threw it into the trash. Slowly, she snaked her arms around her lover, relishing the smooth feeling of his skin underneath his shirt, it was ripped but she didn't care. The two lovers sat there feeling each other's bodies for so long the nurse checked on them, but left quickly with a smile, they would pull through, she could see it. Eventually, Fujin took a deep breath,
"Did you mean it? Did you mean it when you said there will be other chances?"
Seifer gasped slightly when he heard Fujin's voice, silken, soft, smooth, untortured, it was music. Despite himself he smiled, bringing Fujin's face up to meet his, kissing her softened lips, drawing breaths, but unable to breath them as he looked into her eyes, both her beautiful eyes. Fujin looked at him, so loved, so lovingly in his eyes, that he felt unworthy to have such an amazing woman in his arms. He certainly didn't deserve her, and it made him sad.
"I've messed up so much. I've endangered you, and Rajin... Rajin, he's paying the price." Seifer looked into Fujin's eyes as she sunk her gaze into him, asking silently what had happened to Rajin,
"They took him away, Fuu. Right in front of me, and I was too weak and shocked to stop them. He cut a deal with the Estharians, he takes all responcibility, we go free. He said it was the only way to protect you... to keep us together. He's awaiting trial right now. But Laguna tells me that it's going to be okay, that everything is going to work out, that Rajin will get off and we'll all be together again. But one thing has been torturing me, why? Why didn't you tell me, Fujin?"
Throughout the whole speech, Fujin had let her eyes fall slowly, watching his nose, mouth, chin, neck, stopping at his chest, she stared at his chest, as his arms slung around her, and she froze hoping he wouldn't try and look in her eyes, she had to stay strong.
"You would have... we would have... RUN" she said, jerking her eyes painfully to look him in the face, reverting to her old form of speech,
"FUGITIVE"
"Fujin, I would have saved you!"
"No, Seifer! You wouldn't have saved anything. Yes, maybe we would have kept the child, I'd still be pregnant, but think about it! They would have been chasing us our entire lives, and that would have been nothing to live for. No child deserves that. Where would we have gone, Seifer? If we had given up they would have separated us, and we probably would never see each other again. No, I have faith that what Rajin did, what we did was for the best. There will be other chances, right? Please tell me we'll have other chances!" Fujin broke into a fit of sobs, throwing her arms around him again, hugging him as tightly as she could, praying that he wouldn't hate her now. She must have whispered it, because Seifer gently pulled her into a sitting position facing him,
"I love you. I love you... I have nothing else to say... that's it. There is nothing I want more than to love you, caress you, marry you, be your most intimate lover and friend, there is nothing more I want than to be there when you carry our children, to hold your hand when it gets tough, and to protect you when there's danger, how stupid could I get, Fujin? You are clearly the only thing worth fighting for, dying for. And I'll never let you go... if you'll have m..." Seifer couldn't finish his sentence as Fujin wrenched him down and kissed him passionately on the lips.
That kiss was like a salvation, each pouring everything into it, relishing and cherishing each second, as long as it went on. Breathless, Seifer broke the kiss opening his eyes slowly, catching Fujin's cheek with his lips, tracing her face up to her forehead with his lips, kissing her forehead and holding onto her as if life depended on it, and for him it did.
"I take that as a yes?" he breathed out, hearing a foreign sound emanate from Fujin's lips on his neck, realising as her body quaked that she was laughing, and she looked up at him, tears streaming, lips spread in the biggest smile he had ever seen grace her features laughing over tears of joy and relief. Instantly he started laughing and the two lovers' joy fluttered through the halls, touching one long haired man briefly, but powerfully as Laguna Loire let himself hum again, everything is gonna to be alright.
ANNOUNCEMENT: A bit shorter, but I had to get this chapter out. WHOOHOO!! Only about... four or six chapters left, folks! We've made it near the end. Thanks for all the reviews, they've litterally kept me going. This is a hard fic to write merely because of the emotional content. It's quite draining, but for all who have been here since the beginning, thank you, everything's going to be alright.
Perfect Soldier 01 - Alrighty, here you go: the next chapter, fairly soon I think. Fujin and Seifer happy? Sounds about right dontcha think?
Kjata - Well, this chapter is also fairly short, but the ending of it felt right. Expect some Rajin in following chapters, we can't forget about him. And thanks for the compliments, I wish there was more I could write.
Riverwood - I am glad the chapters have hit you so emotionally, that's what I got from them. I try to make things as powerful as I can, otherwise why bother, eh? Your picture sounds amazing. I hope I get to see all of them soon. I kind of think I'm not the only one waiting to see them, ya know ;).
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Laguna paced the hall of the OR waiting for news on the young silver haired woman inside. Eventually a nurse came out holding a chart, passed it to the President, as he flipped it open, leaned away, looking up in the older man's eyes sadly. She saw him sigh deeply, run a hand through his greying hair and walk slowly to the room he left Seifer in, every step heavy and clinging, vibrating with the metal on his steel toed boots.
Stopping right up against the doorframe, Laguna turned away, leaning and sliding down all the way to the floor, trying somehow to muster up the courage to enter the room where he could hear the restless silence drifting under the door cracks. He couldn't do it. He couldn't walk into that room and flip open the clipboard, tell Seifer the contents... it wasn't right. They might have been on the wrong side, they might have fought for evil, but the more he thought about it, the more he watched Seifer and Fujin, the more he heard from Rajin's interrogation the more it looked like... he didn't know Hyne he didn't know! It was like they were being manipulated, and blackmailed, like the Sorceress used their love against them and now... he was only trying to save her and look what happened! Maybe that was how it was supposed to be, maybe everythings going to be alright, he could do something, they could prove the Posse's good nature, innocence... but that wouldn't help heal all wounds. Some were closed forever. Laguna bored holes in the floor by his feet, all the memories of Raine's death flooding into him, the brokeness, the pain, but then there was Squall. At least he had Squall, but he couldn't keep him, Squall didn't even know who he really was. As he was lost in the thoughts, Kiros came up and sat beside him,
"Everythings happening all over again"
"Yeah."
"We couldn't save everyone, that was never the deal"
"I know"
"He needs to know, Laguna"
"Yeah" Laguna answered, looking down further, just wanting someone to hold, flashing back to his first seeing baby Squall. Kiros paused, watching his friend's face intently, tracing every curve and wrinkle, he had been there when Laguna fell for Raine, he had watched them get married, take care of Ellone, he had been there when she whispered secret words in Laguna's ear, held his hand, he remembers seeing them fall asleep under the stars in the flower fields, calmly snuggled together holding on for all their worth. But it wasn't enough, she still died, Ellone was still taken, and there was nothing they could do. All he could do was watch Laguna cry, watch the mighty, yet foppish man break down, and here he was again, seventeen years later watching Laguna break over Seifer and Fujin, the two lovers of the age. Sure there was Squall and Rinoa, but they were never going to have it hard, their suffering was over, but Seifer and Fujin never ceased to suffer, they have never had a good time, just torment, and it came to Kiros that maybe that's why Rajin did what he did, maybe that was the reason for his sacrifice: to give Fujin and Seifer a chance. Just one chance to have a happy time, to end the horror that permiated everything in them, to raise them up and for them to live without pain, reguardless of what happened to him, he would die for them. What a sacrifice! Kiros was jostled in his musings with Laguna shifting, raising the clipboard to his view then tossing it aside, sending it skidding across the hallway floor.
"How, Kiros? How do I do it?"
"What would have helped the most? When it was you in there?"
Laguna sat silent for a minute, took a deep breath and looked up to see Kiros already standing over him,
"A hand for a friend." Kiros said, helping Laguna up off the floor.
"Thanks. I guess I should..."
"Yes, you should, and I should as well, I have someone who needs a companion" Kiros began walking toward the exit, as Laguna stared, turned, and entered the room. It was full of sunlight.
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Fujin driften into consicousness with an irritating beep beep beep constantly droning in her ears. The last thing she remembered was jolting awake with Seifer's mouth over hers, breathing deeply into her lungs, kissing her and whispering I love you's. She had allowed herself to sink back into unconsciousness after that, she knew Seifer would take care of her, and as she opened her eyes to see the grey ceil... HER EYES!
Fujin jostled forward, the beep on the monitor increasing fast, then fading back to a more normal pace as she blinked, and felt her left eye with her hands.
"I can... see?" Fujin said, grabbing her throat and feeling for the ever present scar that had hindered her words for so long. It wasn't there. . .
"Am I... in heaven?" she whispered, trying out her voice, gasping at the ease in speaking words. Slowly, she leaned her hand down along her body, something wasn't right, there was something she could not feel, before she could wrap her mind around it, she heard the voices of two medics outside her door,
"Sad, really. We were able to repair her eyes and many of the scars on her body, but we couldn't save the fetus."
"Poor thing, I wonder how they're going to break the news to her, that her child was miscarried"
"I heard President Loire is in with the father of the child right now, I heard he's trying to break it to him gently, something about losing his wife"
"I didn't know President Loire was married?"
"Yeah, died in childbirth. No one knows what happened to the kid though"
"Hey, my shift's over, fancy getting something to eat?"
"Yeah, sure. Marketplace sound good?"
Fujin toned the rest of the conversation out, gasping back tears as she felt her abdomen, noted the slight bruise left from surgery. She had to be strong, she had to be ready when Seifer came... but where's Rajin? He should be here she thought, the feeling of being completely alone overwhelming her, ripping across her face in a cascade of tears, gasps and sobs wrenching her from her relaxed position on her back to wrapping herself in the fetal position, her face looking to the window the nurses had covered with blinds. Outside she could hear baby birds chirping for their mother, but her repose was muted by a soft knocking on the door.
"Fuj... Fujin?" Seifer gulped, dropping his fist from the door, stepping inside and looking outside to where Laguna placed a fatherly hand on his shoulder, giving him a playful push towards his lover, then closing the door behind him. Alone, Seifer tried to call her name again, but the syllables ended in his throat as he heard her hushed sobs choking back tears. Rushing over, he leaned onto her bed, placing his hands on her shoulder and hair. Laguna had told him of her recovery, her eye and throat, but he also told him other things, horrible things, and as Seifer saw and felt Fujin's shoulders heave slightly as she tried to get control... it ripped him apart. Putting himself completely on the bed, he took the young broken woman in his arms, lifted her to him, cradling her securely, rocking back and forth slowly, gently whispering,
"Everything's going to be alright... shhh, Fujin, shhhh, there will be better times, other chances"
Fujin felt Seifer plant a kiss on her head, and she shut her eyes tight allowing him to rock her, to sing a soothing lullaby in her ears with the promises he spoke, as she sniffed, he brought her a tissue from the hospital table,
"Blow" Seifer said, as she blew her nose in the tissue and he threw it into the trash. Slowly, she snaked her arms around her lover, relishing the smooth feeling of his skin underneath his shirt, it was ripped but she didn't care. The two lovers sat there feeling each other's bodies for so long the nurse checked on them, but left quickly with a smile, they would pull through, she could see it. Eventually, Fujin took a deep breath,
"Did you mean it? Did you mean it when you said there will be other chances?"
Seifer gasped slightly when he heard Fujin's voice, silken, soft, smooth, untortured, it was music. Despite himself he smiled, bringing Fujin's face up to meet his, kissing her softened lips, drawing breaths, but unable to breath them as he looked into her eyes, both her beautiful eyes. Fujin looked at him, so loved, so lovingly in his eyes, that he felt unworthy to have such an amazing woman in his arms. He certainly didn't deserve her, and it made him sad.
"I've messed up so much. I've endangered you, and Rajin... Rajin, he's paying the price." Seifer looked into Fujin's eyes as she sunk her gaze into him, asking silently what had happened to Rajin,
"They took him away, Fuu. Right in front of me, and I was too weak and shocked to stop them. He cut a deal with the Estharians, he takes all responcibility, we go free. He said it was the only way to protect you... to keep us together. He's awaiting trial right now. But Laguna tells me that it's going to be okay, that everything is going to work out, that Rajin will get off and we'll all be together again. But one thing has been torturing me, why? Why didn't you tell me, Fujin?"
Throughout the whole speech, Fujin had let her eyes fall slowly, watching his nose, mouth, chin, neck, stopping at his chest, she stared at his chest, as his arms slung around her, and she froze hoping he wouldn't try and look in her eyes, she had to stay strong.
"You would have... we would have... RUN" she said, jerking her eyes painfully to look him in the face, reverting to her old form of speech,
"FUGITIVE"
"Fujin, I would have saved you!"
"No, Seifer! You wouldn't have saved anything. Yes, maybe we would have kept the child, I'd still be pregnant, but think about it! They would have been chasing us our entire lives, and that would have been nothing to live for. No child deserves that. Where would we have gone, Seifer? If we had given up they would have separated us, and we probably would never see each other again. No, I have faith that what Rajin did, what we did was for the best. There will be other chances, right? Please tell me we'll have other chances!" Fujin broke into a fit of sobs, throwing her arms around him again, hugging him as tightly as she could, praying that he wouldn't hate her now. She must have whispered it, because Seifer gently pulled her into a sitting position facing him,
"I love you. I love you... I have nothing else to say... that's it. There is nothing I want more than to love you, caress you, marry you, be your most intimate lover and friend, there is nothing more I want than to be there when you carry our children, to hold your hand when it gets tough, and to protect you when there's danger, how stupid could I get, Fujin? You are clearly the only thing worth fighting for, dying for. And I'll never let you go... if you'll have m..." Seifer couldn't finish his sentence as Fujin wrenched him down and kissed him passionately on the lips.
That kiss was like a salvation, each pouring everything into it, relishing and cherishing each second, as long as it went on. Breathless, Seifer broke the kiss opening his eyes slowly, catching Fujin's cheek with his lips, tracing her face up to her forehead with his lips, kissing her forehead and holding onto her as if life depended on it, and for him it did.
"I take that as a yes?" he breathed out, hearing a foreign sound emanate from Fujin's lips on his neck, realising as her body quaked that she was laughing, and she looked up at him, tears streaming, lips spread in the biggest smile he had ever seen grace her features laughing over tears of joy and relief. Instantly he started laughing and the two lovers' joy fluttered through the halls, touching one long haired man briefly, but powerfully as Laguna Loire let himself hum again, everything is gonna to be alright.