Disclaimer: Still not with the owning of anything!
A/N: God! Don't you just hate it when you know what you want to happen in a story but the moment you try to put the words on the page all you get is gibberish? Well this is what I've been battling for three days now and it's given me plenty of headaches let me tell you!
Chapter 11: Crazy people
Buffy hugged her legs to her chest, her arms wrapped around her knees as she shed silent tears. When had it all gone wrong? She had been so happy that morning when she had awoken in Spike's arms. She had felt so safe in the knowledge that he was keeping his promise to protect her…but when she had gone downstairs everything had changed. She could tell from the hesitant looks on their faces that they had something to say that she wasn't going to like, she just never expected it to be that.
She'd tried so hard to hide it from them, to let them think that she was alright and not as scared out of her mind as she really was. All she'd managed to do was convince them that she was crazy. They wanted to send her away; put her in one of those…'loony bins'…that's what you do with crazy people. Of course Spike had tried to tell her that all they wanted was for her to have therapy. Oh she knew all about therapy. She'd been told all about therapy! She didn't kid herself that she was smart, they'd all let her know she was anything but smart! But Dru had shown her what they did to the crazy people…
Six years ago…"Now you sit there." Dru told Buffy sweetly, indicating a spot just a few feet in front of the television. Buffy of course did as she was told but she was very confused. She hadn't been allowed to watch television for the last year because Dru had told her that only good children got to watch television. Buffy wasn't good so Buffy didn't get to watch. She felt a tingle of excitement however – maybe Dru had changed her mind and decided that she was a good girl after all. All such hopes were quelled however the moment Liam came into the room carrying several videocassettes.
"Oh my Angel," cooed Drusilla, "You found them. Treats for daddy later!"
"Yeah baby," Liam answered with a leer, taking in all of Dru's form, hoping this wouldn't take long. He was horny as hell. "I found 'em. What do you want them for anyway?"
"Little Buffy's been a naughty girl – talking to people who aren't there." Dru informed him primly. Her tone instantly changing from playful to stern for Buffy's benefit. The girl in question gulped in response. She was sure that she'd been so quiet this time. She didn't mean to talk to herself. But she didn't have any friends from school – even if she did she knew Dru wouldn't let her bring them over to the house to play – so she pretended in her head that she and William were still friends and she would tell him about her day. She knew he wasn't really there, and part of her wondered if she'd ever met him at all. But she needed someone to talk to.
"Again?" Liam asked incredulously. "That girls round the bend!"
"Exactly." Drusilla told him. "That's why we needed these. To show her what happened so crazy people."
Buffy was shaking by the time she was allowed to go to bed much later, not that she wanted to sleep, knowing that she would see those images all over again. Buffy vaguely wondered how long Dru had been planning this – it must have taken ages to gather all those clips together. What did she do? Just go through the local blockbuster and pick out all the films that had crazy people in them?
As she lay on her tiny bed she closed her eyes and willed the images to stay away…naturally they didn't listen. She was assaulted with visions of electric shock therapy, people eating bugs, people wrapped up in straight jackets, people chewing their own limbs off and so many more. Buffy's eyes flew open and she ran across the basement to the sink and threw up everything she had in her stomach.
As she calmed down she decided that maybe sleeping wasn't such a good idea tonight. She wanted to talk to William, but that's what had gotten her in this mess in the first place. Maybe Dru was right. Maybe she was crazy. Would it still count if she talked, just not out loud, like if she talked in her head? The boy in that one film could talk to people in his head and he wasn't crazy, just his father was. Buffy was determined not to prove she wasn't insane as Dru insisted, she didn't want to be put in a loony bin like she threatened to do if she caught her talking to herself again. Taking a deep breath, Buffy prepared herself for a night of staring at the wall trying to ward off sleep…
Oh yes Buffy knew what happened to crazy people. Not even Dru had gone through with her promise of having her committed, despite having it constantly hanging in the air. It was the last think she had expected from Spike and Joyce. They had seemed so different to Dru, and Buffy wracked her brain trying to think of what she had done to convince them she needed 'professional help' as they had called it. She knew for a fact she hadn't been talking to herself again – she couldn't for one thing! She was startled out of her thoughts by a hesitant knock on her door followed by the head of a very worried looking Spike poking into the room.
"Buffy," he spoke quietly "Why did you run?"
Buffy looked up as if he were the one who were insane. What kind of a stupid question was that? Angrily grabbing her notebook she scribbled her reply.
Because you think I'm insane and want to send me away – wouldn't you run?
Spike walked into the room and took the note from Buffy's trembling fingers, his brow creased in confusion. "I don't think you're insane Buffy." He told her calmly, wondering where in the hell she'd gotten that impression. "And I don't want to send you away. We just think maybe you need to see a therapist or…" he didn't get to finish his sentence however since the notebook was taken from his hands so Buffy could respond.
I don't want therapy.I don't want them to fry my brain!
It took Spike a while to figure out what she was talking about. As soon as he realised she mean Electric shock therapy he was shocked. Did they even still do that anymore? Well even if they did he'd never let it happen to Buffy! Why would she think that? "Buffy." He began, trying to keep calm "I just mean maybe talking to a councillor. You don't even have to go to a hospital – they have private offices and everything."
It took hours for Spike to convince Buffy that all he wanted was for her to talk (or write) to someone about how she was feeling so that she wouldn't have the nightmares anymore – that had been pretty strong incentive! He'd even told her that they might be able to help her talk some more. Eventually he had had to promise to go with her and never leave her side so that no one could take her away and she had agreed to go, although he could see she was still somewhat reluctant about the whole idea.
Spike was exhausted as he headed back to his own room, but he was satisfied that at least Buffy knew he wanted only to help her. The quiet "Thanks Spike" she had whispered had made it all worthwhile.
A/N: Still can't decide if I like that chapter or not. Hopefully you'll let me know what you think of it. Love you all!