~Chapter Twenty- Befriending Slytherin~
"Draco wants me to go with him," Cari finally blurted. It was nearing the end of November, although still no snow had fallen, over a month since Lindsey's conversation with Snape about Hogsmeade. He had spoken with Professor Dumbledore and he had agreed, knowing more about Lindsey's past than she had revealed to Snape, or she even knew herself, and so Severus had signed her permission slip. They had just had a trip there at the beginning of the month and Lindsey had had the time of her life.
"Where? To the library or something?" Lindsey was absorbed in Herbology homework (can you believe it?) and was really only half paying attention.
"No, to… his mansion," Cari said slowly, then paused. "His home. For Christmas holidays?" This is finally what caught Lindsey's attention.
"What?" she exclaimed, her head snapping up. Cari sat down heavily on the nearby chair with a sigh.
"Draco suggested I come stay with them over Christmas vacation," she repeated. "You know, with Mom still overseas and Dad at work all the time… it wouldn't be much of a holiday…" She paused, then upon seeing Lindsey's expression rushed on, "You could come too, if you'd like. I'd feel horrible leaving you here!"
Silence.
"Well…?" Cari prompted. Lindsey took her time to answer, and when she did she spoke slowly and contemplatively.
"How do you think your parents would feel about you spending vacation at a boy's house? That's the biggest problem," she said. Cari interrupted haltingly.
"Well, uh, see…" She laughed nervously. "The plan was I'd tell my parents I was staying here to do some extra work. They'd be perfectly fine with that," she added dryly.
Lindsey blinked. What was going on? Cari suggesting lying to spend time with a boy? And going to a quidditch game instead of doing her Astronomy homework? Surely the world must be ending.
She stared at her friend for a good long while, so long that Cari began to fidget uncomfortably. Finally Lindsey spoke with conviction and straightforwardness.
"Whatever you do Cari, it's your decision. I'm staying here for break because it's my choice. You have to make yours." She shrugged simply.
Cari looked at her a moment, blinking, then away in thought. That wasn't what she had wanted to hear.
Well, what did you want to hear?
She didn't know.
"I'm going to head to the quidditch game," she said, getting up. "Sure you don't want to come?" Lindsey shook her head, looking at her strangely. "Well… I'll see you, then."
Cari walked out the door still thinking. Although not what she wanted to hear, perhaps Lindsey's words were what she needed to hear. It was her life, her decision. Cari nodded to herself then, and proceeded to the quidditch pitch with an ever so slightly cleared mind.
* * *
Lindsey watched the knight's portrait swing closed over the opening Cari had just left. She was so confused. Never in her life had she seen Cari act this way. True, it's not like she'd known her all her life, but she knew enough to realize how very out of character this was for her.
What she had said about staying at Hogwarts for Christmas being her choice was rather funny; she didn't have a choice. She knew Draco had invited Cari, not her, for winter break. She wasn't wanted there and she knew it. Though she wondered if Cari knew it too, or if she was really that deluded.
Lindsey sighed and closed her Herbology book. She had a tutoring session with Professor Snape tonight. She'd been having these for at least a month and Cari was well aware of that; it must've just slipped her mind. Resignedly, she picked up her things and walked from the empty commonroom down to the dungeons.
* * *
"What's the matter with you today?" Snape asked exasperatedly. For although during her detention and the start of their tutoring sessions neither had been too keen on spending that much time with the other, they had eventually gotten to be fairly good acquaintances, friends even. At any rate, it was closer than any other student was to the enigmatic professor.
Already that night Lindsey had made two mistakes on the potion they were brewing, and was only on the second step. This was as bad as when the tutoring started. And the only reason they'd begun work on the potion was because Lindsey's focus kept drifting off during her History of Magic homework. Such was the case again.
"What?" she asked dumbly, as if she'd just been woken up. Snape gently removed the jar of newt's toes from Lindsey's vice grip hovering over the cauldron.
"Newt's toes come only after the potion has cooled sufficiently," Snape reminded her as if they'd already been over this more times than he cared to remember. Which they had.
"What's wrong?" he asked softly. Then to cover up his concern, "Because if you're not going to pay attention you may as well not bother me with these tutoring sessions. And then you can forget about earning a decent score on your O.W.L.S."
Lindsey sighed angrily and rubbed hr eyes with the heels of her hands, then ran her fingers agitatedly through her hair, which promptly returned to hang in her face.
"I'm sorry!" she cried. "I'm sorry. It's just… well… I'll try harder, okay? I promise I'll focus." She took a deep breath and steeled herself. She checked the cauldron's temperature, then went for the jar of newt's toes. However, Snape put his hand down on them first. She looked up at him quizzically.
"Tell me what's wrong," he said, looking at her evenly. He said it simply, a statement, as regular as "I went to the quidditch game last night" or something. Lindsey looked down from his relentless gaze, for once not able to hold it, wondering if she should say what was on her mind.
After a moment of noticeable inner debate she finally blurted, "It's Cari."
She finally looked back up at him. He said nothing, just looked coolly back at her, waiting for her to continue, though waiting because he cared to know or because he wanted her to be done and get back to the potion she was not sure; his expression was unreadable.
"I… I…" she stammered a moment, still not sure whether she should say or not. Well, since Cari, her only confidant, wasn't there, she thought, this man was the next person she could confide in. The thought struck her oddly. Finally she decided and went on to speak with the apologetic urgency of a child who has to go to the bathroom really bad.
"I don't know if I should be telling you this," she started with final reluctance before plunging on, "But I think Cari is going to spend the winter holiday with Draco." She paused to see if there would be any reaction.
She got none.
"What's more," she went on, now feeling that she somehow must prove the significance of the matter, "she's telling her parents she's staying here to do extra school work. Her father's an auror; there's no way he'd let her spend holiday with a boy, let alone a Malfoy." She stopped abruptly. She wasn't sure she should've said that; he was still a teacher after all, and supposedly he was close friends with Draco's father, Lucius. She swallowed and stared, waiting for him to say something, not wanting to speak for fear she would dig herself deeper into the grave she had started.
"And this bothers you?" was all he said.
"Y-yes it bothers me," Lindsey stammered, still unsure of what kind of ground she was treading on here. She was going to elaborate, but found she lacked the eloquence to; she didn't know what else to say.
"Why?" Snape asked.
"Why?" Lindsey repeated, blinking. "Well, because… because…" She didn't quite know how to respond to that one. Then she decided the absolute truth would be best, even though this would be the first time she'd be admitting it, even to herself.
"Because… well because she'd… she'd be leaving me… all alone again. I'm sick of being alone." She sighed. "I mean, the whole winter break; that's two weeks, isn't it?"
Again she couldn't hold the professor's gaze and dropped her eyes. Suddenly she became fiercely embarrassed at the tears she unexpectedly felt pricking her eyes and began to blink furiously.
Clearing her throat she said briskly, "I think the potion's ready for those newt's toes now." She slid the container out from under Snape's hand without looking at him and began adding the required amount of reptilian extremities.
And so the session went on, with Lindsey now able to focus a bit more and Snape remaining mostly silent the rest of the time, looking over her other homework assignments they had been working on. Lindsey had absolutely no idea what he thought about what she had said for he gave absolutely no indication, even for someone as finely attuned as Lindsey. This was one reason she liked him, she realized suddenly, and it was like a light turned on in a place you knew was there but couldn't see before. She was so skilled at reading people that few were mysteries to her for long, and yet he was. Still he remained a closed book and this, she apprehended, was the reason he intrigued her.
The potion was nearing completion as was the time for Lindsey's tutoring session when Snape finally spoke again.
She was just capping the last vial when he said, "Well done on your Charms paper. I believe you may have finally grasped the concept of the motion charm, at least rudimentarily." It was an odd thing for him to say, a compliment such as that, despite the fact that he made it as deprecating as a compliment could be. Lindsey looked at him.
"Thank you," she said, and she meant it.
He nodded and stood up, checking the clock as he did so.
"You can go ahead and leave now," he said, letting her out ten minutes early. Lindsey nodded in gratitude and went to get her things.
Once all was gathered she walked to the door, calling a polite, "See you Friday, Professor" over her shoulder. She just heard the muttered reply from within and for some reason couldn't help smiling as she turned and walked down the corridor.
* * *
That Friday, as Cari and Lindsey worked together on a potion in the last class of the day, Snape approached them on his usual rounds of the classroom.
"Miss Wormtongue," he addressed suddenly. Lindsey looked up sharply. She had been just about to add boomslang skin to the simmering brew; she didn't think it was aconite. Instead of chastising her, however, he said rather awkwardly, pointedly ignoring Cari's presence, "Is it right of me to presume you shall wish to continue lessons over the winter holidays? Lord knows you need it…" Lindsey nodded.
"Good," he continued. "And also…" here he faltered slightly. "I've decided to perform a full restocking of the school's store of potions, ingredients as well. I'm expecting this to take most of the winter holidays, but I can't do it alone," he added pointedly.
Lindsey hesitated a moment thoughtfully, eyes boring into his. He tried hard not to look away in embarrassment, but it was difficult. God, it was hard to be nice!
He sighed inwardly as she nodded her head slowly, relieved he could now walk away after his own curt nod. Cari just blinked at the both of them, then shook her head, and continued on with the potion.
~~~ Oh my gosh I just have to tell all my reviewers how very much I love you!!! *tear tear* I know this has been a rather, er… long-winded fic (^_^;;) but thanks for bearing with me guys; I've been writing a lot lately and hope to bring this one to it's grand conclusion soon. (Meaning sometime this year.) So again: THANK YOU SO MUCH!! ^.^ ~~~