A/N: Thanks to Exotria for the wonderful review! Big hug to my beta,
Lissie! Isn't she the best? She was my inspiration for this chapter, so big
round of applause for Lis!
Remember those rules we talked about? Well, they are about to be bent, possibly even broken. You have been warned...
Disclaimer: I own nothing; J. K. Rowling owns everything. So what's new?
*************
Chapter 2 - 'Phase One' begins
Harry awoke the next morning with a feeling of dread. He, Ron, and Hermione had spent three hours the previous night going over Hermione's list of ways to get back at Snape. They weren't going to be able to do all of the things Hermione had listed, but they were going to do several of them throughout the coming year. Today was the start of it all, or "Phase One" as 'Mione called it. Harry groaned and rubbed his hands over his face when he remembered what Hermione had in mind for Snape tonight. It, unfortunately, involved Harry. You see, ever since Harry had met Tonks he'd been obsessed with wanting to learn to be a Metamorphmagus. After much coaxing, Tonks agreed to teach Harry how to become one, but warned him that it would most likely be impossible for him to be very skilled at it. Harry, however, had proved to be a quick learner. It had taken nearly a year to master, but now he was quite good at changing his physical appearance. Hermione had decided that this could be used to their advantage. Especially since not many people knew about it. Harry sighed and, deciding it was no use to put off the inevitable, got out of bed. It was time to head to the Great Hall for breakfast.
~
Hermione was already seated at the Gryffindor table when Harry walked in a few minutes later. Ron, however, wasn't anywhere to be found.
"Already sent him to distract Snape, have you?" Harry asked, sitting across from her. They were at the very end of the table, Hermione sitting on the side that would put her closest to Snape's usual seat at the head table. Breakfast wasn't due to start for another twenty or so minutes, so the Great Hall was pretty much deserted save for the pair of them. Hermione had wanted to make sure that nothing could go wrong, so she made Harry and Ron get up extra early on a Saturday of all days! 'But at least,' Harry thought, yawning, 'I didn't get Ron's job. Poor Ron.' Then the thought of what Harry was going to be doing later hit him, and he shuddered. He would much rather have Ron's job then do what was ahead of him. It was their first Hogsmeade weekend for crying out loud! Hermione was just determined to ruin it for him. Harry scowled at the table top. He still couldn't believe he had let Hermione talk him into even thinking about it! Hermione glanced at him and knew exactly what he was thinking.
"We don't have another choice, Harry. I told you that I heard Professor McGonagall talking with Flitwick about all the professors getting together at the Three Broomsticks this afternoon. It will be our best opportunity!" Harry looked at her, still scowling.
"What's to say that Snape will even be there? Won't he melt or something when the sun hits his skin?" Hermione smiled slightly.
"I think Dumbledore will make him go, whether he wants to or not." Harry slumped on the table, defeated. Hermione smiled at him again. The doors to the Great Hall opened just then, and a few students filed inside to take their seats. Dumbledore and a couple of the other professors also arrived at the head table. Hermione checked the time. Only ten minutes to go...
~
Ron came running into the Great Hall fifteen minutes later, red in the face and breathless. He was right on time. Hermione had just finished charming the food that had appeared in front of Snape's empty seat.
"Well," she asked, slipping her wand back inside her robes, "is he on his way?"
"After threatening to put me in detention for the rest of my life, yeah," Ron breathed heavily. He sat down next to Harry and began piling scrambled eggs onto his plate. Barely seconds later, the doors burst open and in walked Severus Snape, robes billowing behind him as usual. He shot a contemptuous look at the trio as he walked past them. They were trying very hard to not stare at the surly professor as he took his seat and began piling food onto his plate from the dishes Hermione had charmed. The first fork full of eggs was halfway to his mouth when Flitwick began speaking to him. He set the fork back on his plate. 'Drat!' thought Hermione. 'Stop chatting and eat.' The spell Hermione had cast changed the way the food would taste. Snape's breakfast was not going to be very pleasant. Unless he enjoyed bacon that tasted like grass, toast that tasted like sardines, sausage that tasted like leather, and eggs that had no taste at all. Hermione smiled when she thought about this. 'I sometimes even amaze myself.' Her mind was pulled from its musing, however, when Snape picked up his fork again. 'Almost,' Hermione thought, 'almost...' The fork reached Snape's mouth. 'Yes!'
The look on Snape's face was priceless! It was somewhere between utter confusion and sheer bewilderment. He chewed, swallowed, and stared at his plate. The eggs had, of course, been charmed to taste like absolutely nothing. If this was his reaction to the eggs, Hermione couldn't wait to see him try the toast. She looked at Harry and Ron, who were on the other side of the table. They were also watching Snape out of the corner of their eyes, waiting to see what would happen next. Hermione returned her attention to Snape. He was pushing the eggs around on his plate, still looking very confused. Then, to Hermione's wondrous delight, he put his fork down and picked up his toast. Snape took a big bite and chewed on the piece of toast for a moment. Another peculiar look stole over his features before he...GAGGED! Rather loudly, I must add. So loudly in fact that it drew the attention of the other professors. Ron was taking a drink at the moment this happened. He almost dropped the cup. Snape grabbed his napkin and spit the piece of toast into it.
"Severus, are you alright?" Professor Flitwick asked, looking concerned.
"Yes, yes," Snape said rubbing at his mouth. He gave the rest of his food a scornful look before standing up. "I believe I've lost my appetite. Excuse me." Before stepping away from the head table, Snape paused and looked around at the students, no doubt trying to spot the guilty party. His gaze lingered at the Gryffindor table. The three hurriedly fixed their features into what they hoped was anything but guilty, but they didn't look at him. Snape scowled in their direction before continuing out of the Great Hall. As soon as the doors closed behind him, they began to laugh.
"Oh, the look on his face when he tried the toast!" Ron said, wiping at his eyes.
"I liked his expression after the eggs," said Harry.
"Well," Hermione said, looking toward the doors, "that was only the beginning..."
~
"Hermione, please don't make me do this!" Harry begged her for the hundredth time in the past hour. They were in Hogsmeade, standing just inside the doorway of the shop across from the Three Broomsticks. They were waiting for the professors to arrive.
"Harry, it's the next logical step. Besides, no one is going to know it's you!"
"Yeah, but I will," Harry said, looking forlorn. Ron made a noise behind him. Harry turned around and glared.
"I was just clearing my throat!"
"Yeah, I just bet you were. You've been laughing every few minutes."
"Hey, I can't help it! When I think about what you're going to do..." Ron snickered again. Harry was about to say something, but Hermione beat him to it.
"Ron, if you don't shut up he won't do it at all." Harry looked back at her.
"Who says I'm still going to do it?" Hermione turned around to face him.
"Oh Harry, please don't-"
"Here they come!" hissed Ron, backing up a few steps. Hermione whipped around to look. Sure enough, there were most of the professors from Hogwarts, walking toward the Three Broomsticks. Hermione's heart jumped to her throat. Was Snape...? Yes, there he was! He was at the very back of the group, looking more sullen than ever.
"Okay, let them get settled and then Ron and I will go inside. We'll sit at the table next to the windows and signal you when it's time for you to come. Okay?" Harry didn't say anything. He was suddenly feeling a little sick...Hermione turned to look at him. "Please, Harry," she said. He scowled at her.
"Oh, alright!" Hermione threw her arms around his neck in a quick hug before grabbing Ron's wrist and dragging him into the Three Broomsticks. Harry stepped behind a little outcropping of wall so no one would see him transform. 'Here goes,' he thought, taking a deep breath. The next second, a woman was standing in Harry's place. A very beautiful brunette, to be more specific. She had wavy hair that looked kind of like Hermione's, high cheek bones, and very long legs. Harry kept his eyes, though. Hermione had told him to change the color, but he decided against it. Harry looked down at himself. He was now wearing a very red shirt with a very red skirt. The shirt was positively clinging to him and the skirt was too short. Harry was tempted to change the outfit to jeans and a shirt, but Hermione would kill him. So, bracing himself, he stepped out from behind the wall. This earned him stares from every male in the shop and a catcall from the clerk. Harry threw them a 'don't mess with me look' over his shoulder before stepping outside and staring at the window of the Three Broomsticks. After a second, Hermione motioned at him. 'Here we go...' he thought, cringing. Harry walked through the door and tried to remain unnoticed, for the moment at least. He was able to make it to a table towards the back pretty easily. The table wasn't too far from the professors, however, so Harry could easily hear what they were saying.
"Severus," Dumbledore said, slapping the potions master on the back, "Why don't you get the drinks for us?" Severus shot the headmaster daggers, but Dumbledore didn't seem to notice as everyone gave Snape their order. Snarling a little, Snape stood and walked to the bar to get the drinks. Harry looked over at Hermione, hoping feebly that he might yet get out of this. Hermione, however, jerked her head in Snape's direction and mouthed "go." Harry took another deep breath and stood. Ron was never going to let him live this one down...
Harry walked between the tables toward the bar, swinging his hips as Hermione had told him to. He felt heads turn in his direction, but tried to ignore them. Harry found himself standing behind Snape all too soon. He smiled a strained smile before placing his hand on Snape's shoulder.
"Hi there," he said, moving close to Snape's side as he slid his hand down his shoulder to Snape's hand. All the while he was thinking, 'This is not my body. This is not my body.' "Buy me a drink?" he asked, trying to not look revolted. Snape looked at him, slight surprise in his eyes.
"What are you drinking?" he asked on a sigh.
"A butterbeer would be great." Snape ordered him one. When it came, Harry took his hand off of Snape's to take it from him. He took a long, slow sip from the bottle, perfectly aware that Snape was watching him intently. Harry had to suppress the notion to gag.
"So," Harry started, after taking the bottle away from his lips, "what brings you out on a day like this?" Snape ignored him. "What's wrong?" he asked, sliding closer to Snape. "Not much of a conversationalist?" Snape looked at him finally. His eyes looked very annoyed.
"Actually, no." He began setting the other professors' drinks onto a tray.
"Oh, that's too bad," Harry said in a sultry voice. "I have stories that I'm sure you would find very interesting..." Snape looked at him again.
"Another day perhaps?"
"Perhaps," Harry said, starting to move away. "Thanks for the drink."
"Oh, it was my pleasure," Snape said, watching him walk away. Harry practically ran to the bathroom once he was out of eyesight of Snape. It was a good thing no one else was in the men's room or else things might have gotten complicated. Harry transformed again. This time, he was a big burly guy with rippling biceps and a long ponytail. Harry looked at himself in the mirror. He did look a little foreboding...'Good,' he thought, walking out of the bathroom again. He looked toward the bar, hoping his opportunity wasn't lost. No, it wasn't. Snape was still there, gathering the drinks. Harry put on the angriest look he could muster before walking straight toward Snape.
"You!" he yelled, pointing at Snape. "The one who was flirting with my woman!" Everyone grew quiet, staring mesmerized at the scene unfolding before them. Snape never had time to react. Harry was on him in an instant.
"Hey, I'm talking to you!" he shouted again, grabbing Snape's robes and turning him around. "I better not ever catch you talking to her again! Understand?" Harry yelled in Snape's face, holding him by the front of his robes about a foot away from himself. Snape looked dumbfounded for an instant before regaining his composure.
"Unhand me!" he yelled, yanking at Harry's hands.
"I asked you if you understood what I'm saying?" Harry lifted Snape off the floor a couple of inches.
"Please put my Potions Professor back on the ground," Dumbledore said, coming up behind Harry. Harry glanced at him over his shoulder before looking back at Snape.
"Potions Professor, eh?" Harry sneered, putting Snape back down. "Well, now I know where to find you if you ever mess with my girl again. Remember that." Harry looked from Snape to Dumbledore and back before walking out the door. He walked a few shops down from the Three Broomsticks before ducking inside to change back. Once back outside, he leaned against the window and felt like he was going to be sick. He couldn't believe what he had just done! And in front of half the school, no less. Just then, Harry heard laughter. Very loud laughter. He looked up to see Ron and Hermione staggering toward him, absolutely howling.
"Harry!" Hermione said, having to put her hand on the window for support. "That was-was BRILLIANT! You should've seen Snape's face after you stormed out the door." Hermione began laughing again.
"Yeah, Harry," Ron said, clutching his side. "The whole place exploded after you stormed out. Even Dumbledore was chuckling." Ron laughed again as well.
"Snape looked absolutely livid!" Hermione straightened and wiped the tears from her eyes. "You weren't half bad yourself, Harry. Thank you." Harry shrugged it off.
"Yeah, well...It's no big deal."
"No big deal?! Oh, Harry, I wish you could've seen his face! It would've made you feel a lot better." Harry smiled at them finally.
"Can we go back to Hogwarts now?"
"Of course," Hermione said, slipping one arm through Harry's and the other through Ron's. "Dinner is in a couple of hours." Ron and Harry looked at each other, horrified.
"What are we going to do during dinner?" Ron asked. "Wasn't that enough for now?" Hermione ignored the last comment.
"Oh, don't worry, you two. It's nothing major. I'm just going to make his dessert taste like leather."
~
Hermione was true to her word, too. Before dinner, she sneaked down to the kitchens and gave the elves the special dessert for Snape. She had charmed it to taste like leather. The word of what happened in the Three Broomsticks had spread like wildfire, and by the time dinner arrived, people were laughing behind Snape's back whenever he passed. Sometimes he noticed and sometimes he didn't. If he did, the ones who were caught received a month's detention with Filch. Snape was only halfway to the Great Hall when it became clear that Filch was going to be very busy for the next couple of months. Harry, Ron, and Hermione did their best to not look at him during dinner. Everyone else in the Great Hall, however, were not only looking at Snape frequently, they were also discussing the incident quite loudly. It seemed to be the favorite topic of conversation.
Snape was looking around evilly at everyone when the food appeared. Breakfast seemed to come back to him when he saw the food. He looked at all of it accusingly before putting a small amount of potatoes on his plate. He scooped a small amount onto his fork before bringing it to his mouth. Finding that the potatoes actually tasted like potatoes, he felt braver and began putting more food on his plate. Satisfied that all his food tasted like it should, he ate his fill.
When dessert arrived, Snape felt no inhibitions toward digging right into the cherry pie. He immediately regretted it. The pie tasted like old shoe leather. Snape swallowed instead of spitting it out. He excused himself from the head table for the second time that day before storming out of the Great Hall.
"Well," Ron said, looking at Hermione, "I think we're off to a great start getting revenge."
"Yeah," agreed Harry. "This has to have been one of the worst days of his life." Hermione grinned.
"Yes, I think so, too. We won't do anything else for a couple of days, but this is far from over."
********************
So, what did you think? How was the idea with the food? The scene in the Three Broomsticks? And what has gotten into Hermione?! She's acting more Slytherin than Gryffindor, it seems. Please review!
Remember those rules we talked about? Well, they are about to be bent, possibly even broken. You have been warned...
Disclaimer: I own nothing; J. K. Rowling owns everything. So what's new?
*************
Chapter 2 - 'Phase One' begins
Harry awoke the next morning with a feeling of dread. He, Ron, and Hermione had spent three hours the previous night going over Hermione's list of ways to get back at Snape. They weren't going to be able to do all of the things Hermione had listed, but they were going to do several of them throughout the coming year. Today was the start of it all, or "Phase One" as 'Mione called it. Harry groaned and rubbed his hands over his face when he remembered what Hermione had in mind for Snape tonight. It, unfortunately, involved Harry. You see, ever since Harry had met Tonks he'd been obsessed with wanting to learn to be a Metamorphmagus. After much coaxing, Tonks agreed to teach Harry how to become one, but warned him that it would most likely be impossible for him to be very skilled at it. Harry, however, had proved to be a quick learner. It had taken nearly a year to master, but now he was quite good at changing his physical appearance. Hermione had decided that this could be used to their advantage. Especially since not many people knew about it. Harry sighed and, deciding it was no use to put off the inevitable, got out of bed. It was time to head to the Great Hall for breakfast.
~
Hermione was already seated at the Gryffindor table when Harry walked in a few minutes later. Ron, however, wasn't anywhere to be found.
"Already sent him to distract Snape, have you?" Harry asked, sitting across from her. They were at the very end of the table, Hermione sitting on the side that would put her closest to Snape's usual seat at the head table. Breakfast wasn't due to start for another twenty or so minutes, so the Great Hall was pretty much deserted save for the pair of them. Hermione had wanted to make sure that nothing could go wrong, so she made Harry and Ron get up extra early on a Saturday of all days! 'But at least,' Harry thought, yawning, 'I didn't get Ron's job. Poor Ron.' Then the thought of what Harry was going to be doing later hit him, and he shuddered. He would much rather have Ron's job then do what was ahead of him. It was their first Hogsmeade weekend for crying out loud! Hermione was just determined to ruin it for him. Harry scowled at the table top. He still couldn't believe he had let Hermione talk him into even thinking about it! Hermione glanced at him and knew exactly what he was thinking.
"We don't have another choice, Harry. I told you that I heard Professor McGonagall talking with Flitwick about all the professors getting together at the Three Broomsticks this afternoon. It will be our best opportunity!" Harry looked at her, still scowling.
"What's to say that Snape will even be there? Won't he melt or something when the sun hits his skin?" Hermione smiled slightly.
"I think Dumbledore will make him go, whether he wants to or not." Harry slumped on the table, defeated. Hermione smiled at him again. The doors to the Great Hall opened just then, and a few students filed inside to take their seats. Dumbledore and a couple of the other professors also arrived at the head table. Hermione checked the time. Only ten minutes to go...
~
Ron came running into the Great Hall fifteen minutes later, red in the face and breathless. He was right on time. Hermione had just finished charming the food that had appeared in front of Snape's empty seat.
"Well," she asked, slipping her wand back inside her robes, "is he on his way?"
"After threatening to put me in detention for the rest of my life, yeah," Ron breathed heavily. He sat down next to Harry and began piling scrambled eggs onto his plate. Barely seconds later, the doors burst open and in walked Severus Snape, robes billowing behind him as usual. He shot a contemptuous look at the trio as he walked past them. They were trying very hard to not stare at the surly professor as he took his seat and began piling food onto his plate from the dishes Hermione had charmed. The first fork full of eggs was halfway to his mouth when Flitwick began speaking to him. He set the fork back on his plate. 'Drat!' thought Hermione. 'Stop chatting and eat.' The spell Hermione had cast changed the way the food would taste. Snape's breakfast was not going to be very pleasant. Unless he enjoyed bacon that tasted like grass, toast that tasted like sardines, sausage that tasted like leather, and eggs that had no taste at all. Hermione smiled when she thought about this. 'I sometimes even amaze myself.' Her mind was pulled from its musing, however, when Snape picked up his fork again. 'Almost,' Hermione thought, 'almost...' The fork reached Snape's mouth. 'Yes!'
The look on Snape's face was priceless! It was somewhere between utter confusion and sheer bewilderment. He chewed, swallowed, and stared at his plate. The eggs had, of course, been charmed to taste like absolutely nothing. If this was his reaction to the eggs, Hermione couldn't wait to see him try the toast. She looked at Harry and Ron, who were on the other side of the table. They were also watching Snape out of the corner of their eyes, waiting to see what would happen next. Hermione returned her attention to Snape. He was pushing the eggs around on his plate, still looking very confused. Then, to Hermione's wondrous delight, he put his fork down and picked up his toast. Snape took a big bite and chewed on the piece of toast for a moment. Another peculiar look stole over his features before he...GAGGED! Rather loudly, I must add. So loudly in fact that it drew the attention of the other professors. Ron was taking a drink at the moment this happened. He almost dropped the cup. Snape grabbed his napkin and spit the piece of toast into it.
"Severus, are you alright?" Professor Flitwick asked, looking concerned.
"Yes, yes," Snape said rubbing at his mouth. He gave the rest of his food a scornful look before standing up. "I believe I've lost my appetite. Excuse me." Before stepping away from the head table, Snape paused and looked around at the students, no doubt trying to spot the guilty party. His gaze lingered at the Gryffindor table. The three hurriedly fixed their features into what they hoped was anything but guilty, but they didn't look at him. Snape scowled in their direction before continuing out of the Great Hall. As soon as the doors closed behind him, they began to laugh.
"Oh, the look on his face when he tried the toast!" Ron said, wiping at his eyes.
"I liked his expression after the eggs," said Harry.
"Well," Hermione said, looking toward the doors, "that was only the beginning..."
~
"Hermione, please don't make me do this!" Harry begged her for the hundredth time in the past hour. They were in Hogsmeade, standing just inside the doorway of the shop across from the Three Broomsticks. They were waiting for the professors to arrive.
"Harry, it's the next logical step. Besides, no one is going to know it's you!"
"Yeah, but I will," Harry said, looking forlorn. Ron made a noise behind him. Harry turned around and glared.
"I was just clearing my throat!"
"Yeah, I just bet you were. You've been laughing every few minutes."
"Hey, I can't help it! When I think about what you're going to do..." Ron snickered again. Harry was about to say something, but Hermione beat him to it.
"Ron, if you don't shut up he won't do it at all." Harry looked back at her.
"Who says I'm still going to do it?" Hermione turned around to face him.
"Oh Harry, please don't-"
"Here they come!" hissed Ron, backing up a few steps. Hermione whipped around to look. Sure enough, there were most of the professors from Hogwarts, walking toward the Three Broomsticks. Hermione's heart jumped to her throat. Was Snape...? Yes, there he was! He was at the very back of the group, looking more sullen than ever.
"Okay, let them get settled and then Ron and I will go inside. We'll sit at the table next to the windows and signal you when it's time for you to come. Okay?" Harry didn't say anything. He was suddenly feeling a little sick...Hermione turned to look at him. "Please, Harry," she said. He scowled at her.
"Oh, alright!" Hermione threw her arms around his neck in a quick hug before grabbing Ron's wrist and dragging him into the Three Broomsticks. Harry stepped behind a little outcropping of wall so no one would see him transform. 'Here goes,' he thought, taking a deep breath. The next second, a woman was standing in Harry's place. A very beautiful brunette, to be more specific. She had wavy hair that looked kind of like Hermione's, high cheek bones, and very long legs. Harry kept his eyes, though. Hermione had told him to change the color, but he decided against it. Harry looked down at himself. He was now wearing a very red shirt with a very red skirt. The shirt was positively clinging to him and the skirt was too short. Harry was tempted to change the outfit to jeans and a shirt, but Hermione would kill him. So, bracing himself, he stepped out from behind the wall. This earned him stares from every male in the shop and a catcall from the clerk. Harry threw them a 'don't mess with me look' over his shoulder before stepping outside and staring at the window of the Three Broomsticks. After a second, Hermione motioned at him. 'Here we go...' he thought, cringing. Harry walked through the door and tried to remain unnoticed, for the moment at least. He was able to make it to a table towards the back pretty easily. The table wasn't too far from the professors, however, so Harry could easily hear what they were saying.
"Severus," Dumbledore said, slapping the potions master on the back, "Why don't you get the drinks for us?" Severus shot the headmaster daggers, but Dumbledore didn't seem to notice as everyone gave Snape their order. Snarling a little, Snape stood and walked to the bar to get the drinks. Harry looked over at Hermione, hoping feebly that he might yet get out of this. Hermione, however, jerked her head in Snape's direction and mouthed "go." Harry took another deep breath and stood. Ron was never going to let him live this one down...
Harry walked between the tables toward the bar, swinging his hips as Hermione had told him to. He felt heads turn in his direction, but tried to ignore them. Harry found himself standing behind Snape all too soon. He smiled a strained smile before placing his hand on Snape's shoulder.
"Hi there," he said, moving close to Snape's side as he slid his hand down his shoulder to Snape's hand. All the while he was thinking, 'This is not my body. This is not my body.' "Buy me a drink?" he asked, trying to not look revolted. Snape looked at him, slight surprise in his eyes.
"What are you drinking?" he asked on a sigh.
"A butterbeer would be great." Snape ordered him one. When it came, Harry took his hand off of Snape's to take it from him. He took a long, slow sip from the bottle, perfectly aware that Snape was watching him intently. Harry had to suppress the notion to gag.
"So," Harry started, after taking the bottle away from his lips, "what brings you out on a day like this?" Snape ignored him. "What's wrong?" he asked, sliding closer to Snape. "Not much of a conversationalist?" Snape looked at him finally. His eyes looked very annoyed.
"Actually, no." He began setting the other professors' drinks onto a tray.
"Oh, that's too bad," Harry said in a sultry voice. "I have stories that I'm sure you would find very interesting..." Snape looked at him again.
"Another day perhaps?"
"Perhaps," Harry said, starting to move away. "Thanks for the drink."
"Oh, it was my pleasure," Snape said, watching him walk away. Harry practically ran to the bathroom once he was out of eyesight of Snape. It was a good thing no one else was in the men's room or else things might have gotten complicated. Harry transformed again. This time, he was a big burly guy with rippling biceps and a long ponytail. Harry looked at himself in the mirror. He did look a little foreboding...'Good,' he thought, walking out of the bathroom again. He looked toward the bar, hoping his opportunity wasn't lost. No, it wasn't. Snape was still there, gathering the drinks. Harry put on the angriest look he could muster before walking straight toward Snape.
"You!" he yelled, pointing at Snape. "The one who was flirting with my woman!" Everyone grew quiet, staring mesmerized at the scene unfolding before them. Snape never had time to react. Harry was on him in an instant.
"Hey, I'm talking to you!" he shouted again, grabbing Snape's robes and turning him around. "I better not ever catch you talking to her again! Understand?" Harry yelled in Snape's face, holding him by the front of his robes about a foot away from himself. Snape looked dumbfounded for an instant before regaining his composure.
"Unhand me!" he yelled, yanking at Harry's hands.
"I asked you if you understood what I'm saying?" Harry lifted Snape off the floor a couple of inches.
"Please put my Potions Professor back on the ground," Dumbledore said, coming up behind Harry. Harry glanced at him over his shoulder before looking back at Snape.
"Potions Professor, eh?" Harry sneered, putting Snape back down. "Well, now I know where to find you if you ever mess with my girl again. Remember that." Harry looked from Snape to Dumbledore and back before walking out the door. He walked a few shops down from the Three Broomsticks before ducking inside to change back. Once back outside, he leaned against the window and felt like he was going to be sick. He couldn't believe what he had just done! And in front of half the school, no less. Just then, Harry heard laughter. Very loud laughter. He looked up to see Ron and Hermione staggering toward him, absolutely howling.
"Harry!" Hermione said, having to put her hand on the window for support. "That was-was BRILLIANT! You should've seen Snape's face after you stormed out the door." Hermione began laughing again.
"Yeah, Harry," Ron said, clutching his side. "The whole place exploded after you stormed out. Even Dumbledore was chuckling." Ron laughed again as well.
"Snape looked absolutely livid!" Hermione straightened and wiped the tears from her eyes. "You weren't half bad yourself, Harry. Thank you." Harry shrugged it off.
"Yeah, well...It's no big deal."
"No big deal?! Oh, Harry, I wish you could've seen his face! It would've made you feel a lot better." Harry smiled at them finally.
"Can we go back to Hogwarts now?"
"Of course," Hermione said, slipping one arm through Harry's and the other through Ron's. "Dinner is in a couple of hours." Ron and Harry looked at each other, horrified.
"What are we going to do during dinner?" Ron asked. "Wasn't that enough for now?" Hermione ignored the last comment.
"Oh, don't worry, you two. It's nothing major. I'm just going to make his dessert taste like leather."
~
Hermione was true to her word, too. Before dinner, she sneaked down to the kitchens and gave the elves the special dessert for Snape. She had charmed it to taste like leather. The word of what happened in the Three Broomsticks had spread like wildfire, and by the time dinner arrived, people were laughing behind Snape's back whenever he passed. Sometimes he noticed and sometimes he didn't. If he did, the ones who were caught received a month's detention with Filch. Snape was only halfway to the Great Hall when it became clear that Filch was going to be very busy for the next couple of months. Harry, Ron, and Hermione did their best to not look at him during dinner. Everyone else in the Great Hall, however, were not only looking at Snape frequently, they were also discussing the incident quite loudly. It seemed to be the favorite topic of conversation.
Snape was looking around evilly at everyone when the food appeared. Breakfast seemed to come back to him when he saw the food. He looked at all of it accusingly before putting a small amount of potatoes on his plate. He scooped a small amount onto his fork before bringing it to his mouth. Finding that the potatoes actually tasted like potatoes, he felt braver and began putting more food on his plate. Satisfied that all his food tasted like it should, he ate his fill.
When dessert arrived, Snape felt no inhibitions toward digging right into the cherry pie. He immediately regretted it. The pie tasted like old shoe leather. Snape swallowed instead of spitting it out. He excused himself from the head table for the second time that day before storming out of the Great Hall.
"Well," Ron said, looking at Hermione, "I think we're off to a great start getting revenge."
"Yeah," agreed Harry. "This has to have been one of the worst days of his life." Hermione grinned.
"Yes, I think so, too. We won't do anything else for a couple of days, but this is far from over."
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So, what did you think? How was the idea with the food? The scene in the Three Broomsticks? And what has gotten into Hermione?! She's acting more Slytherin than Gryffindor, it seems. Please review!