This took way too long! And it's the most IMPORTANT chapter of the entire
fanfic! Oh well, a little bit of suspense never killed anybody *gazes upon
the sea of dead bodies in front of her* ..........................................................................................
suspense strikes again.
^*^*^
After Kurama had left, I found myself walking around, heading towards no particular destination.
For the most part, his actions confused me. Kurama seemed to think that not fighting was the only option, the best and only thing to do in the situation. Was he right? I believed that to resolve this, we would have to somewhat deal with the problem, not discard it completely. Besides, in the end, it would turn out the same. Kurama and I would remain unharmed.
If the end result is the same, does it really matter what you did to get there...?
I looked up from the ground to find I had almost walked all the way back to where we were staying. So, I decided to just finish up and get some much needed rest.
I walked inside, quietly entering my room. I didn't much feel like speaking with anyone, especially Kurama.
I had convinced myself that I was right. Kurama's decision was oddly naïve, and as far as I was concerned, it had nothing to back it up. What if we dropped out of every fight where someone's feelings might get hurt!!! And if he thought I wanted to go through with the fight because I wanted to hurt him...then I doubted Kurama was the friend I thought him to be.
I sadly lied down on my bed. When I did, I could have sworn I heard something outside my window. But when I looked, nothing was there. So I brushed it off as nothing and closed my eyes, trying hard to get to sleep, trying hard to push the thoughts of Kurama out of my mind....
*
I awoke to an alarming sight. Kurama was sitting by my bed, gawking at me like I were some sort of god. I raised my eyebrow suspiciously at him.
"What the hell are you looking at?" I asked harshly, glaring at him as I lifted my head.
Kurama laughed giddily.
"I wanted to make sure you had a satisfactory nap," he said, lifting his hand to my forehead, brushing some hair away from my eyes. I backed my head away from him in annoyance.
"Is this your new job then, to oversee my sleep?" I asked sarcastically.
"Yes, but it's mostly for my own enjoyment. I wouldn't call it so much a job as a choice," he told me softly, gently placing his hand over his mouth. Kurama continued to gaze at me. I was beginning to become uncomfortable, but he showed no signs of wanting to leave me alone, nor stop staring. So I would have to put up with, and, of course, pretend I didn't notice.
"Get to the point, what are you *really* doing here?" I asked, folding my arms.
"I like to watch you while you sleep..." he stated, smirking.
"I don't see why," I scoffed, looking away from him.
"You see, when you're aware of my presence, you always act like this. When I watch you sleep...I see you drop your façade completely. It's a beautiful sight. I can see all your emotions expressed at once."
"Oh, really," I said unemotionally, rolling my eyes.
Kurama smiled.
"You seem lonely when you sleep," Kurama said. He got up from his chair and made his way next to me, taking a seat on the bed before I had a chance to protest. It was then that he grabbed my hands. I turned to him, looking directly into his eyes. I became nervous.... Something about the way he looked at me made me feel...frightened. "You cling to your sheets so tightly and possessively, like you long to hold a lover in your arms." I stared at him. At this point, I had become completely confused. But a fair amount of it vanished when Kurama let go of my hands, and wrapped his arms around me, giving me a tight, warm hug. I was a little startled. Was it that Kurama...?
"Kurama--!"
"Don't worry, Hiei, you don't have to be lonely anymore," Kurama laughed, pushing me down, along with himself.
"ACK! Get off me!" I yelled, trying to push Kurama away. I then realized it wasn't working. I wasn't even moving! I was...too...
"I love you, Hiei," Kurama whispered as he leaned down toward me and then gently placed his lips on my own.
I didn't fight him. I would have if I could get my arms to move, though!!! What was going on...? I was confused again...
"Kurama," I started, after he had stopped kissing me. "I thought...we... I thought that we were...you said we...were friends."
"I'm aware of what I said. But I left one thing out," he started, moving his lips right to my ear. "True best friends make excellent lovers."
I started to sweat. And as if I wasn't already scared enough out of my mind, Kurama then began to undress me.
"Kurama..." I warned, although, after hearing myself, I decided I wasn't very convincing.
"Don't worry, Kurama knows what's best for you, love," he purred, taking my lips again.
To my traumatizing surprise, this all continued even further. Not far enough to scar me for life, but far enough to leave me truly scared out of my wits.
*
I quickly sat up in my bed, wide eyed and drenched in sweat. Although, as stressed and FREAKED OUT as I was, I was rather relieved.
"A dream..." I said to myself reassuringly. Of course, whatever good that did left as soon as I saw I was still clutching onto my blankets. I let out a small yelp and dropped them. "What the HELL was THAT about!?!?!?" I cried, quickly getting out of my bed. I then noticed that night had already come. Well, at least no one could hear me.
"Yes, interesting wasn't it?" Correct that last statement...
"What!?" I yelled, spinning around to see a figure at the window. I moved closer to see who it was... "...Yume...?" I said out loud, in deep, deep confusion. Now, had it been Kurama it would have made more sense, or even SOMEONE I KNEW. But the worst part was she seemed to know about what I had dreamt. And that...was a little embarrassing. Be it anyone.
"Who, me?" she asked in an innocent, but sarcastic voice.
"YES!"
"What, surprised to see me?"
"You could say that, especially when you have no business being here."
"I do have 'business' mind you!"
"Which is...?"
"Simply to give you a taste of your own cruel medicine!!" she yelled, giving me a loathing glare.
I had an interesting thought for a second...but soon discarded it.
Then it hit me! If she was partners with Maiko, then she probably worked with illusions! Which would explain the...dream...
"You're...a little sick, aren't you..." I stated, giving her the 'you're a pervert, huh?' look. She laughed.
"Don't over think it. I was only showing something to you, Hiei-chan."
"Well, I certainly don't see how that was beneficial for either of us."
"It was to me," she said smugly.
"Why?" I asked, glaring at her.
"Because I hate you."
"...I still don't get it..."
"Hiei-chan, tell me, what did you feel right when you woke up?"
I thought for a moment.
"Scared," I answered, still glaring at her.
"And how about when you heard the words, 'I love you'?"
I thought about it again. But I didn't answer her.
"I don't see what this has to do with revenge!" I yelled at her, clenching my fists. "If you would like to fight me that's fine! But just come out and say so!"
"Now, when I said, 'a taste of your own medicine', I had no intention of fighting you. After all, you and I have never fought. Payback doesn't allow for /requests/, Hiei-chan. You want to fight me. But unlike you, I would rather torture someone emotionally.... Although perhaps that's more like you than I give you credit for." Yume smiled, with an evil gleam in her eye.
"Stop being so vague! Why not just tell me what you're up to without making me have to ask!"
"If you insist," she mocked, smirking at me. I grunted and shook my head. "I just...needed you to realize your feelings for that Kurama of yours."
I stood there in silence and shock. She was obviously crazy. I didn't...well...feel...stuff...and even if I did...feel...stuff...for that fox it was none of her business! (Not that I did...)
"And why would that benefit you, exactly?" I asked sarcastically. "It seems as though your idea of 'revenge' isn't exactly what I would call 'torture'."
"Never did I say revenge," she spoke sternly. "I am *not* seeking revenge for what you've done to...me. I am only going to inflict the same pain to you, so that you will learn from it." She then started to leave through the window. "Sorry in advance," she whispered, winking as she disappeared outside.
I just stood, unknowing of what exactly to think of this all. I had never even spoken to Yume. Why would she want to harm me so badly?
I then glanced at the clock, seeing that I had only gotten less than a half hour of sleep.
"Crap..." I muttered to myself, walking over to the sofa and turning on the television. I truly didn't care anymore....
*
After watching hour after hour of Green Acres, morning had finally come. And if it was possible, I was even more stressed and tired than I had been last night. I had quite a few things running around my mind. Many, many questions lined up to be answer. But my brain was currently closed. I was far too sleepy to sort things out.
I looked at the clock again. I still had three hours before my fight with Kurama. Then I opened my mind for thinking, as I lied down on my bed, deciding it would be safe to sleep as long as a /certain/ topic didn't enter my train of thought.
Maybe it would be best to talk to Kurama at some point before our fight.... Besides, I was certainly certain that that /certain/ topic would flood my dreams until I talked things out with Kurama.
All of the sudden I wasn't tired anymore. So, I opened my eyes and sat up. Then saw that once again I had been holding onto the blankets rather tightly. I nodded to myself, then hopped out of bed and hurried over to Kurama's room (after fixing up a bit).
I stood at his door silently. Waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting... "Hiei...?" Kurama said, after he had opened the door, probably on his way out. I looked away, trying to mask the sudden rush of pain that had taken over my chest. Not to mention I was blushing out of insane embarrassment.
"Kurama...if we're going to fight each other today...then I want to go into it knowing exactly why you don't want to," I said firmly, walking into his room and taking a seat in a chair. Kurama walked over to his bed and sat down. I turned the chair to keep my eyes perfectly matched up with him the whole way.
"Alright, Hiei," Kurama started, taking a deep breath. His cheeks then became notably pinker.... Odd.
"THE SHIRMP!!!!" I turned around to see Kuwabara standing there, holding a soda with a surprised look on his face. "So you're *not* dead!" he said, looking past me to Kurama. I then noticed him wink, as if he was somehow mocking Kurama....
"Umm, Hiei, I'll catch up with you in a little while. I need to go talk to Yusuke for a moment!" Kurama said, standing up and hiding his even redder face as he ran out the door. I glared at Kuwabara.
"What did you do to him?" I accused sarcastically, glaring at the idiot.
"Nothing. If anything, it's your fault he's acting all crazy!"
"WELL I KNOW THAT!" I yelled. Kurama had *clearly* become upset when I mentioned our fight....
"You...know...THAT!?" Kuwabara asked, sounding as though he was very, very shocked.
"Yes, I know that," I repeated mockingly, shaking my head.
"When did...did Kurama tell you or something?"
"No! Didn't you see him just now!? It's written all over his face!"
"And...what do you think of it...?"
"What do I think of it? I'm going to stop it, if that's what you mean."
"STOP IT!? You little jerk! Why don't you just accept the way Kurama feels!?"
"BECAUSE THE FIGHT'S IN THREE HOURS!" There was a long pause of silence....... "We're not talking about the same thing, are we...?" I asked, blankly staring up at Kuwabara. He shook his head. I then became curious. "So, what were *you* talking about then!?" I asked, getting out of the chair and running to corner Kuwabara at the...corner.
"Nothing!" he cried, nervously, frightened, and GUILTY!
"Answer or when we finish up here and go back, I'll kill your cat!" I threatened.
"ALRIGHT FINE!" He surrendered, wincing a little in fear.
"Well!?" I said impatiently.
"Kurama...likes you, okay!?" he said, his eyes wandering.
My heart was suddenly impacted with tremendous pain. I didn't want him to... If he felt that way... While and if it wasn't true, at least there would be something keep us from being...
"No..." I sighed, backing from Kuwabara, shaking my head.
"No? What? Don't you like him back?" he asked, blinking at me with curiosity.
"I don't," I answered, turning my back to him as I ran for the door.
I needed to find Kurama quickly; I needed to call of the fight before it was too late.
/I love you, Hiei.../
I abruptly stopped walking in the hall, slowly moving to the floor and taking a seat.
It was then that it all took its toll. That question my heart kept trying to answer. I had avoided it up until now, but I really had known.
That strange feeling that overcame me as soon as Kurama said I was closest to his heart.
I closed my eyes and sighed, spreading my legs out on the floor, and lifting a hand to my chest. It didn't feel different at all when touched. But...there was still a warn feeling pulsing through me.
Kurama was different than the others. The way he moved, the way he moved me. The way he spoke, to me. And even how he looked, into my eyes....
No...!
I clenched my fists, and then gave the floor a punch.
Why me? Why not Yusuke!? At least would be able to admit it.... And that was probably the one thing that would make Kurama most happy.
I couldn't bear to see Kurama. Not now.
I hurried and got up, then dashed to my room.
Even if I didn't want to, I would have to see Kurama when we fought. So, I would still go through with it. No matter how much it hurt. I knew how Kurama felt now.... Even if we staged it, it would still...hurt. Nevertheless, I would. I didn't want Kurama to know how I felt, at least not yet. I still wanted to be best friends.... In the end, I believed I would enjoy it more, I would be happier....
I glanced at my clock. Damn, how time passes when you're denying your heart.
I got up, and headed for the battle area.
I had my blade close at hand. Kurama would need to be smart and react quickly if this was going to work. I didn't want him hurt after all....
Upon arrival, I spotted Yusuke and Kuwabara watching a ways away. Kurama was with them.
We shared a long stare.
He looked a little sad as he and I entered the ring.
"Hiei, I'm sorry we didn't get to talk..."
/ Kurama, if we're going to fight each other today, then I want to go into it knowing exactly why you don't want to./
"Don't worry. I have no questions that need to be answered anymore."
An interesting expression then came over his face. It was neither happy nor angry. It was...a look of question.
I shifted my eyes around for a while, as did Kurama. I knew how I felt, and I was pretty certain Kurama felt the same. That odd feeling...
"BEGIN!"
I was jolted out of my trance. We were...supposed to start fighting. Kurama and I hesitated a little, until I finally reached for my sword, took a deep breath and then prepared to 'attack' Kurama. He was unaware of *how* I planned to pretend to injure him, that made things hard...and dangerous.
Why did we have to do this...? Why couldn't we have just stayed behind...? Did we always have to be kind enough to help out...?
I would never fight Kurama....
I ran towards Kurama, sword drawn, and prepared to attack....
In mid run, I noticed Kurama's expression had gone blank. I wondered why. But then, I saw his knees begin to give out, and him start to collapse. It was too late for me to stop moving, so instead, I threw my sword off to the side and made it to Kurama just in time to break his fall and catch him.
What was his problem!? If this was some sort of trick to get out of fighting me he would pay.
I shook him a little.
"Kurama?"
There was no response.
Then I became worried.
I slowly leaned closer to him, putting my hand on his chest and my ear near his nose. *Of course* he wasn't breathing.
A thought then came to mind; I didn't want the one I loved to die! I could put up with a lot of things, a lot of pain, but losing Kurama was not something I could handle. I cared about him too much. I had little to call my own. I hadn't much that I cared for. Didn't I deserve to keep Kurama?
I held Kurama tighter, then looked up to see everyone else around was just staring. But I didn't care.
"Yusuke! Kuwabara!" I yelled to them, impatiently waiting for the two to come. "End the fight!" I called to the referee. He gave me a strange look in return.
"But... I cannot just call it off. Someone has to win," he said, looking around nervously.
"Let Kurama, then," I said firmly, then turned to Yusuke and Kuwabara. "Take care of Kurama for me," I told them, trying to stop my worry from showing. I doubt I did well at it, though. My voice was shaky, as were my legs as I stood up and ran to a back entrance.
She had no right to do this! I would save Kurama at all costs. But...somehow...she knew that. Why would Yume do this when she knew it was in vain? If she was out for revenge, she wouldn't enjoy it. Yume would die long before Kurama.
Sure enough, Yume was standing there, as I expected. I simply gave her a look, one that said how upset I was about Kurama, on that showed how *angry* I was with her, and an expression...of sudden realization.
I did love Kurama.
"Do you see...?" she asked, her eyes watering, but she somehow let out a smile. I let my façade die, showing in full my worry and terror. "How would you feel...if he were to die without ever being able to tell him how you feel...?" she asked again, tears now spilling from her eyes.
My mind and heart was jolted. It was then that I knew...I had hurt her. She was only trying to show me her pain. The pain not only I had caused but herself as well.
"I'm sorry.... I didn't realize," I whispered, closing my eyes to hold back tears. "Let Kurama go and I'll do anything!"
"You can't relieve my pain, so why should I allay yours!?" she cried out, wiping away a tear or two.
"This is why everyone in this time is so messed up!" I yelled. "We feel that in order to move on, others have to have gone through our same torture! But isn't it better to not only have ourselves learn from our mistakes, but anyone else who has the chance to as well!?"
"Exactly," she said softly. "I already let Kurama wake up. But tell me, when you held him in your arms and gazed upon his face...did he or did he not look lonely?" I remained silent. "A true best friend would do anything to make that loneliness go away. Anyone can have a lover, or a friend...but a best friend is more than either. Any real best friends would show no hesitance in getting married. A lover is special and dear, but a real best friend is your true soul mate."
"I feel awful," I said, turning to look at the ground.
"That's love," she laughed, moving closer to me and gently placing her hand on my shoulder. "It's too late for me, so don't dwell on it. I'll deal with it on my own. Instead, focus on your relationship with Kurama. And next time, think about what you're doing before needlessly taking lives," she said, gently giving me a kiss on the cheek.
"I better go. I need to apologize and tell Kurama I was wrong to fight him...."
"Wrong? I wouldn't say that, Hiei-chan. In the end, you were both looking out for each other's wellbeing. That's what matters. Kurama wished to stop the fight. He's open about his feelings. You're just a little shy, and that's fine," she said sweetly, smiling back at me as she walked off. I waved and returned the smile.
I hurried back over to the others, who had moved Kurama off to the side somewhere and were persistently asking him over and over again, 'are you all right?' He simply laughed at them and nodded.
"Now, you're sure you're all right?" I asked sarcastically, as I bent down to Kurama and smiled.
"...Y-yes..." he answered slowly, as a blush crept onto his cheeks.
Yusuke and Kuwabara glanced at each other quickly, knowingly, then looked back down at us.
"Who wants to go to the beach!?" Yusuke cried out excitedly.
"The /beach/? It seems you already forgot that this tournament isn't over yet!" I yelled, glaring up at him. "Not to mention that there isn't even a beach around here—"
"Ah, ah, ah! You're forgetting that my next fight doesn't take place for a while, and there's a beach like...a mile that way," he said, pointing in front of him and to the side.
I got an annoyed look on my face as I prepared to insult Yusuke, but I was interrupted by a certain, stupid, smiling fox.
"That sounds fun," he chirped, getting up and looking down at me. "Doesn't it, Hiei?"
"Whatever," I sighed, folding my arms.
"Great! Then we'll go!" Yusuke said cheerfully, then turning to Kuwabara. "Say, Kuwabara, could you help me pack up all the food I have hidden away from you in my room?"
"But of course!" Kuwabara answered, licking his lips as he and the detective walked away.
"Hiei, why don't you and I start out now," Kurama suggested, nodding as he began to leave. I hurried after him.
"I'm sorry, Kurama," I said, after a few minutes of silent walking.
"Hm? For what?" he asked, turning to give me a confused look.
"I shouldn't have let you win that fight. I know how you feel about fighting your friends, and if Yusuke wins his next match—which he will—then there's an extremely good chance you'll be set against him, too."
"You...you let me win...?" he asked, starting to blush again.
"Yes."
"You actually *SURRENDERED*!?" he cried out, sarcastically.
"Surrendering to you, I don't mind," I said, looking away from him.
Kurama then became silent. So we continued our walk without saying a word.
Soon, we had arrived at Yusuke's supposed 'beach.' Which was actually...a...beach... Okay, so he wasn't mistaken.
Kurama, Yusuke, and the oaf all played around for a while, throwing a flying disk at each other, making Kuwabara eat strange things, and constantly yelling over at me, 'wanna join us!?' Like hell!
Quickly it became dark, and the three had built a fire, sat around it, and listened to Yusuke tell strange stories that I guessed were supposed to be 'scary.'
I, of course, had moved away from them, far away. Besides, I needed to think. ...Sure, I wanted to tell Kurama how I felt...a little. But that was a big commitment, especially for someone like me. Who knew what Kurama would want after that? It could be a little too much for me....
"Hiei?"
"AH!" I nearly fell over. "You idiot! Don't sneak up on me like that!" I yelled, glaring up at Kurama.
"I only walked over to you. There was no sneaking involved," he said smugly, taking a seat next to me, quickly glancing over to where Yusuke and Kuwabara were, then back to me. "Aren't you cold?" he asked, tugging at his sweater's sleeve.
"No," I answered firmly, watching in amusement as he took off his sweater and forced it on to me.
"How cute," he laughed, as he fixed and straightened it.
"Cute? Ha!" I scoffed, shaking my head.
"You're always cute," he said softly, putting his hand on my back.
Long silence soon followed.
We both knew what came next, but it was a question of how to start it.
"Kurama, you said...that you cared about me a lot. But now I know exactly how much that is. And...I don't think...that we should let opportunities pass us by so easily. If we like each other, then we should be together...." I said, moving closer to him until our shoulders met.
"I think you're right," he whispered, wrapping his arm around me. I smiled. Then I yawned, closed my eyes, and rested my head against Kurama.
"I hate being so tired," I sighed, laughing a little.
"Poor thing," he chuckled. "Here," he said, grabbing my shoulders and pushing me away from him. He then lied down on his stomach, looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Come on."
I nearly broke out in laughter, but didn't for lack of energy. So, I crawled over to him, lied down, and hesitantly placed my head on his back.
"Goodnight, Hiei," he said softly, turning his head to look at me.
"You're just going to watch me...?" I asked with a laugh.
"I need to make sure you sleep well," he said quietly.
I began to blush like crazy. Was there nothing else he could have said!?!?!
Oh well, it would be great to finally get some rest. Besides, I could have nothing but good dreams knowing that when I woke up the first thing I would see would be Kurama's loving face....
Dream...
If what Yume said was true, then Kurama wouldn't move things along too fast for me. When helping a friend, you're never out for yourself....
^*^*^
Contrary to what it looks like...no... This was *not* the ending! Actually, at first, I planned on it being...but it's not nonetheless. LOL Anyway, PR!
^*^*^
After Kurama had left, I found myself walking around, heading towards no particular destination.
For the most part, his actions confused me. Kurama seemed to think that not fighting was the only option, the best and only thing to do in the situation. Was he right? I believed that to resolve this, we would have to somewhat deal with the problem, not discard it completely. Besides, in the end, it would turn out the same. Kurama and I would remain unharmed.
If the end result is the same, does it really matter what you did to get there...?
I looked up from the ground to find I had almost walked all the way back to where we were staying. So, I decided to just finish up and get some much needed rest.
I walked inside, quietly entering my room. I didn't much feel like speaking with anyone, especially Kurama.
I had convinced myself that I was right. Kurama's decision was oddly naïve, and as far as I was concerned, it had nothing to back it up. What if we dropped out of every fight where someone's feelings might get hurt!!! And if he thought I wanted to go through with the fight because I wanted to hurt him...then I doubted Kurama was the friend I thought him to be.
I sadly lied down on my bed. When I did, I could have sworn I heard something outside my window. But when I looked, nothing was there. So I brushed it off as nothing and closed my eyes, trying hard to get to sleep, trying hard to push the thoughts of Kurama out of my mind....
*
I awoke to an alarming sight. Kurama was sitting by my bed, gawking at me like I were some sort of god. I raised my eyebrow suspiciously at him.
"What the hell are you looking at?" I asked harshly, glaring at him as I lifted my head.
Kurama laughed giddily.
"I wanted to make sure you had a satisfactory nap," he said, lifting his hand to my forehead, brushing some hair away from my eyes. I backed my head away from him in annoyance.
"Is this your new job then, to oversee my sleep?" I asked sarcastically.
"Yes, but it's mostly for my own enjoyment. I wouldn't call it so much a job as a choice," he told me softly, gently placing his hand over his mouth. Kurama continued to gaze at me. I was beginning to become uncomfortable, but he showed no signs of wanting to leave me alone, nor stop staring. So I would have to put up with, and, of course, pretend I didn't notice.
"Get to the point, what are you *really* doing here?" I asked, folding my arms.
"I like to watch you while you sleep..." he stated, smirking.
"I don't see why," I scoffed, looking away from him.
"You see, when you're aware of my presence, you always act like this. When I watch you sleep...I see you drop your façade completely. It's a beautiful sight. I can see all your emotions expressed at once."
"Oh, really," I said unemotionally, rolling my eyes.
Kurama smiled.
"You seem lonely when you sleep," Kurama said. He got up from his chair and made his way next to me, taking a seat on the bed before I had a chance to protest. It was then that he grabbed my hands. I turned to him, looking directly into his eyes. I became nervous.... Something about the way he looked at me made me feel...frightened. "You cling to your sheets so tightly and possessively, like you long to hold a lover in your arms." I stared at him. At this point, I had become completely confused. But a fair amount of it vanished when Kurama let go of my hands, and wrapped his arms around me, giving me a tight, warm hug. I was a little startled. Was it that Kurama...?
"Kurama--!"
"Don't worry, Hiei, you don't have to be lonely anymore," Kurama laughed, pushing me down, along with himself.
"ACK! Get off me!" I yelled, trying to push Kurama away. I then realized it wasn't working. I wasn't even moving! I was...too...
"I love you, Hiei," Kurama whispered as he leaned down toward me and then gently placed his lips on my own.
I didn't fight him. I would have if I could get my arms to move, though!!! What was going on...? I was confused again...
"Kurama," I started, after he had stopped kissing me. "I thought...we... I thought that we were...you said we...were friends."
"I'm aware of what I said. But I left one thing out," he started, moving his lips right to my ear. "True best friends make excellent lovers."
I started to sweat. And as if I wasn't already scared enough out of my mind, Kurama then began to undress me.
"Kurama..." I warned, although, after hearing myself, I decided I wasn't very convincing.
"Don't worry, Kurama knows what's best for you, love," he purred, taking my lips again.
To my traumatizing surprise, this all continued even further. Not far enough to scar me for life, but far enough to leave me truly scared out of my wits.
*
I quickly sat up in my bed, wide eyed and drenched in sweat. Although, as stressed and FREAKED OUT as I was, I was rather relieved.
"A dream..." I said to myself reassuringly. Of course, whatever good that did left as soon as I saw I was still clutching onto my blankets. I let out a small yelp and dropped them. "What the HELL was THAT about!?!?!?" I cried, quickly getting out of my bed. I then noticed that night had already come. Well, at least no one could hear me.
"Yes, interesting wasn't it?" Correct that last statement...
"What!?" I yelled, spinning around to see a figure at the window. I moved closer to see who it was... "...Yume...?" I said out loud, in deep, deep confusion. Now, had it been Kurama it would have made more sense, or even SOMEONE I KNEW. But the worst part was she seemed to know about what I had dreamt. And that...was a little embarrassing. Be it anyone.
"Who, me?" she asked in an innocent, but sarcastic voice.
"YES!"
"What, surprised to see me?"
"You could say that, especially when you have no business being here."
"I do have 'business' mind you!"
"Which is...?"
"Simply to give you a taste of your own cruel medicine!!" she yelled, giving me a loathing glare.
I had an interesting thought for a second...but soon discarded it.
Then it hit me! If she was partners with Maiko, then she probably worked with illusions! Which would explain the...dream...
"You're...a little sick, aren't you..." I stated, giving her the 'you're a pervert, huh?' look. She laughed.
"Don't over think it. I was only showing something to you, Hiei-chan."
"Well, I certainly don't see how that was beneficial for either of us."
"It was to me," she said smugly.
"Why?" I asked, glaring at her.
"Because I hate you."
"...I still don't get it..."
"Hiei-chan, tell me, what did you feel right when you woke up?"
I thought for a moment.
"Scared," I answered, still glaring at her.
"And how about when you heard the words, 'I love you'?"
I thought about it again. But I didn't answer her.
"I don't see what this has to do with revenge!" I yelled at her, clenching my fists. "If you would like to fight me that's fine! But just come out and say so!"
"Now, when I said, 'a taste of your own medicine', I had no intention of fighting you. After all, you and I have never fought. Payback doesn't allow for /requests/, Hiei-chan. You want to fight me. But unlike you, I would rather torture someone emotionally.... Although perhaps that's more like you than I give you credit for." Yume smiled, with an evil gleam in her eye.
"Stop being so vague! Why not just tell me what you're up to without making me have to ask!"
"If you insist," she mocked, smirking at me. I grunted and shook my head. "I just...needed you to realize your feelings for that Kurama of yours."
I stood there in silence and shock. She was obviously crazy. I didn't...well...feel...stuff...and even if I did...feel...stuff...for that fox it was none of her business! (Not that I did...)
"And why would that benefit you, exactly?" I asked sarcastically. "It seems as though your idea of 'revenge' isn't exactly what I would call 'torture'."
"Never did I say revenge," she spoke sternly. "I am *not* seeking revenge for what you've done to...me. I am only going to inflict the same pain to you, so that you will learn from it." She then started to leave through the window. "Sorry in advance," she whispered, winking as she disappeared outside.
I just stood, unknowing of what exactly to think of this all. I had never even spoken to Yume. Why would she want to harm me so badly?
I then glanced at the clock, seeing that I had only gotten less than a half hour of sleep.
"Crap..." I muttered to myself, walking over to the sofa and turning on the television. I truly didn't care anymore....
*
After watching hour after hour of Green Acres, morning had finally come. And if it was possible, I was even more stressed and tired than I had been last night. I had quite a few things running around my mind. Many, many questions lined up to be answer. But my brain was currently closed. I was far too sleepy to sort things out.
I looked at the clock again. I still had three hours before my fight with Kurama. Then I opened my mind for thinking, as I lied down on my bed, deciding it would be safe to sleep as long as a /certain/ topic didn't enter my train of thought.
Maybe it would be best to talk to Kurama at some point before our fight.... Besides, I was certainly certain that that /certain/ topic would flood my dreams until I talked things out with Kurama.
All of the sudden I wasn't tired anymore. So, I opened my eyes and sat up. Then saw that once again I had been holding onto the blankets rather tightly. I nodded to myself, then hopped out of bed and hurried over to Kurama's room (after fixing up a bit).
I stood at his door silently. Waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting... "Hiei...?" Kurama said, after he had opened the door, probably on his way out. I looked away, trying to mask the sudden rush of pain that had taken over my chest. Not to mention I was blushing out of insane embarrassment.
"Kurama...if we're going to fight each other today...then I want to go into it knowing exactly why you don't want to," I said firmly, walking into his room and taking a seat in a chair. Kurama walked over to his bed and sat down. I turned the chair to keep my eyes perfectly matched up with him the whole way.
"Alright, Hiei," Kurama started, taking a deep breath. His cheeks then became notably pinker.... Odd.
"THE SHIRMP!!!!" I turned around to see Kuwabara standing there, holding a soda with a surprised look on his face. "So you're *not* dead!" he said, looking past me to Kurama. I then noticed him wink, as if he was somehow mocking Kurama....
"Umm, Hiei, I'll catch up with you in a little while. I need to go talk to Yusuke for a moment!" Kurama said, standing up and hiding his even redder face as he ran out the door. I glared at Kuwabara.
"What did you do to him?" I accused sarcastically, glaring at the idiot.
"Nothing. If anything, it's your fault he's acting all crazy!"
"WELL I KNOW THAT!" I yelled. Kurama had *clearly* become upset when I mentioned our fight....
"You...know...THAT!?" Kuwabara asked, sounding as though he was very, very shocked.
"Yes, I know that," I repeated mockingly, shaking my head.
"When did...did Kurama tell you or something?"
"No! Didn't you see him just now!? It's written all over his face!"
"And...what do you think of it...?"
"What do I think of it? I'm going to stop it, if that's what you mean."
"STOP IT!? You little jerk! Why don't you just accept the way Kurama feels!?"
"BECAUSE THE FIGHT'S IN THREE HOURS!" There was a long pause of silence....... "We're not talking about the same thing, are we...?" I asked, blankly staring up at Kuwabara. He shook his head. I then became curious. "So, what were *you* talking about then!?" I asked, getting out of the chair and running to corner Kuwabara at the...corner.
"Nothing!" he cried, nervously, frightened, and GUILTY!
"Answer or when we finish up here and go back, I'll kill your cat!" I threatened.
"ALRIGHT FINE!" He surrendered, wincing a little in fear.
"Well!?" I said impatiently.
"Kurama...likes you, okay!?" he said, his eyes wandering.
My heart was suddenly impacted with tremendous pain. I didn't want him to... If he felt that way... While and if it wasn't true, at least there would be something keep us from being...
"No..." I sighed, backing from Kuwabara, shaking my head.
"No? What? Don't you like him back?" he asked, blinking at me with curiosity.
"I don't," I answered, turning my back to him as I ran for the door.
I needed to find Kurama quickly; I needed to call of the fight before it was too late.
/I love you, Hiei.../
I abruptly stopped walking in the hall, slowly moving to the floor and taking a seat.
It was then that it all took its toll. That question my heart kept trying to answer. I had avoided it up until now, but I really had known.
That strange feeling that overcame me as soon as Kurama said I was closest to his heart.
I closed my eyes and sighed, spreading my legs out on the floor, and lifting a hand to my chest. It didn't feel different at all when touched. But...there was still a warn feeling pulsing through me.
Kurama was different than the others. The way he moved, the way he moved me. The way he spoke, to me. And even how he looked, into my eyes....
No...!
I clenched my fists, and then gave the floor a punch.
Why me? Why not Yusuke!? At least would be able to admit it.... And that was probably the one thing that would make Kurama most happy.
I couldn't bear to see Kurama. Not now.
I hurried and got up, then dashed to my room.
Even if I didn't want to, I would have to see Kurama when we fought. So, I would still go through with it. No matter how much it hurt. I knew how Kurama felt now.... Even if we staged it, it would still...hurt. Nevertheless, I would. I didn't want Kurama to know how I felt, at least not yet. I still wanted to be best friends.... In the end, I believed I would enjoy it more, I would be happier....
I glanced at my clock. Damn, how time passes when you're denying your heart.
I got up, and headed for the battle area.
I had my blade close at hand. Kurama would need to be smart and react quickly if this was going to work. I didn't want him hurt after all....
Upon arrival, I spotted Yusuke and Kuwabara watching a ways away. Kurama was with them.
We shared a long stare.
He looked a little sad as he and I entered the ring.
"Hiei, I'm sorry we didn't get to talk..."
/ Kurama, if we're going to fight each other today, then I want to go into it knowing exactly why you don't want to./
"Don't worry. I have no questions that need to be answered anymore."
An interesting expression then came over his face. It was neither happy nor angry. It was...a look of question.
I shifted my eyes around for a while, as did Kurama. I knew how I felt, and I was pretty certain Kurama felt the same. That odd feeling...
"BEGIN!"
I was jolted out of my trance. We were...supposed to start fighting. Kurama and I hesitated a little, until I finally reached for my sword, took a deep breath and then prepared to 'attack' Kurama. He was unaware of *how* I planned to pretend to injure him, that made things hard...and dangerous.
Why did we have to do this...? Why couldn't we have just stayed behind...? Did we always have to be kind enough to help out...?
I would never fight Kurama....
I ran towards Kurama, sword drawn, and prepared to attack....
In mid run, I noticed Kurama's expression had gone blank. I wondered why. But then, I saw his knees begin to give out, and him start to collapse. It was too late for me to stop moving, so instead, I threw my sword off to the side and made it to Kurama just in time to break his fall and catch him.
What was his problem!? If this was some sort of trick to get out of fighting me he would pay.
I shook him a little.
"Kurama?"
There was no response.
Then I became worried.
I slowly leaned closer to him, putting my hand on his chest and my ear near his nose. *Of course* he wasn't breathing.
A thought then came to mind; I didn't want the one I loved to die! I could put up with a lot of things, a lot of pain, but losing Kurama was not something I could handle. I cared about him too much. I had little to call my own. I hadn't much that I cared for. Didn't I deserve to keep Kurama?
I held Kurama tighter, then looked up to see everyone else around was just staring. But I didn't care.
"Yusuke! Kuwabara!" I yelled to them, impatiently waiting for the two to come. "End the fight!" I called to the referee. He gave me a strange look in return.
"But... I cannot just call it off. Someone has to win," he said, looking around nervously.
"Let Kurama, then," I said firmly, then turned to Yusuke and Kuwabara. "Take care of Kurama for me," I told them, trying to stop my worry from showing. I doubt I did well at it, though. My voice was shaky, as were my legs as I stood up and ran to a back entrance.
She had no right to do this! I would save Kurama at all costs. But...somehow...she knew that. Why would Yume do this when she knew it was in vain? If she was out for revenge, she wouldn't enjoy it. Yume would die long before Kurama.
Sure enough, Yume was standing there, as I expected. I simply gave her a look, one that said how upset I was about Kurama, on that showed how *angry* I was with her, and an expression...of sudden realization.
I did love Kurama.
"Do you see...?" she asked, her eyes watering, but she somehow let out a smile. I let my façade die, showing in full my worry and terror. "How would you feel...if he were to die without ever being able to tell him how you feel...?" she asked again, tears now spilling from her eyes.
My mind and heart was jolted. It was then that I knew...I had hurt her. She was only trying to show me her pain. The pain not only I had caused but herself as well.
"I'm sorry.... I didn't realize," I whispered, closing my eyes to hold back tears. "Let Kurama go and I'll do anything!"
"You can't relieve my pain, so why should I allay yours!?" she cried out, wiping away a tear or two.
"This is why everyone in this time is so messed up!" I yelled. "We feel that in order to move on, others have to have gone through our same torture! But isn't it better to not only have ourselves learn from our mistakes, but anyone else who has the chance to as well!?"
"Exactly," she said softly. "I already let Kurama wake up. But tell me, when you held him in your arms and gazed upon his face...did he or did he not look lonely?" I remained silent. "A true best friend would do anything to make that loneliness go away. Anyone can have a lover, or a friend...but a best friend is more than either. Any real best friends would show no hesitance in getting married. A lover is special and dear, but a real best friend is your true soul mate."
"I feel awful," I said, turning to look at the ground.
"That's love," she laughed, moving closer to me and gently placing her hand on my shoulder. "It's too late for me, so don't dwell on it. I'll deal with it on my own. Instead, focus on your relationship with Kurama. And next time, think about what you're doing before needlessly taking lives," she said, gently giving me a kiss on the cheek.
"I better go. I need to apologize and tell Kurama I was wrong to fight him...."
"Wrong? I wouldn't say that, Hiei-chan. In the end, you were both looking out for each other's wellbeing. That's what matters. Kurama wished to stop the fight. He's open about his feelings. You're just a little shy, and that's fine," she said sweetly, smiling back at me as she walked off. I waved and returned the smile.
I hurried back over to the others, who had moved Kurama off to the side somewhere and were persistently asking him over and over again, 'are you all right?' He simply laughed at them and nodded.
"Now, you're sure you're all right?" I asked sarcastically, as I bent down to Kurama and smiled.
"...Y-yes..." he answered slowly, as a blush crept onto his cheeks.
Yusuke and Kuwabara glanced at each other quickly, knowingly, then looked back down at us.
"Who wants to go to the beach!?" Yusuke cried out excitedly.
"The /beach/? It seems you already forgot that this tournament isn't over yet!" I yelled, glaring up at him. "Not to mention that there isn't even a beach around here—"
"Ah, ah, ah! You're forgetting that my next fight doesn't take place for a while, and there's a beach like...a mile that way," he said, pointing in front of him and to the side.
I got an annoyed look on my face as I prepared to insult Yusuke, but I was interrupted by a certain, stupid, smiling fox.
"That sounds fun," he chirped, getting up and looking down at me. "Doesn't it, Hiei?"
"Whatever," I sighed, folding my arms.
"Great! Then we'll go!" Yusuke said cheerfully, then turning to Kuwabara. "Say, Kuwabara, could you help me pack up all the food I have hidden away from you in my room?"
"But of course!" Kuwabara answered, licking his lips as he and the detective walked away.
"Hiei, why don't you and I start out now," Kurama suggested, nodding as he began to leave. I hurried after him.
"I'm sorry, Kurama," I said, after a few minutes of silent walking.
"Hm? For what?" he asked, turning to give me a confused look.
"I shouldn't have let you win that fight. I know how you feel about fighting your friends, and if Yusuke wins his next match—which he will—then there's an extremely good chance you'll be set against him, too."
"You...you let me win...?" he asked, starting to blush again.
"Yes."
"You actually *SURRENDERED*!?" he cried out, sarcastically.
"Surrendering to you, I don't mind," I said, looking away from him.
Kurama then became silent. So we continued our walk without saying a word.
Soon, we had arrived at Yusuke's supposed 'beach.' Which was actually...a...beach... Okay, so he wasn't mistaken.
Kurama, Yusuke, and the oaf all played around for a while, throwing a flying disk at each other, making Kuwabara eat strange things, and constantly yelling over at me, 'wanna join us!?' Like hell!
Quickly it became dark, and the three had built a fire, sat around it, and listened to Yusuke tell strange stories that I guessed were supposed to be 'scary.'
I, of course, had moved away from them, far away. Besides, I needed to think. ...Sure, I wanted to tell Kurama how I felt...a little. But that was a big commitment, especially for someone like me. Who knew what Kurama would want after that? It could be a little too much for me....
"Hiei?"
"AH!" I nearly fell over. "You idiot! Don't sneak up on me like that!" I yelled, glaring up at Kurama.
"I only walked over to you. There was no sneaking involved," he said smugly, taking a seat next to me, quickly glancing over to where Yusuke and Kuwabara were, then back to me. "Aren't you cold?" he asked, tugging at his sweater's sleeve.
"No," I answered firmly, watching in amusement as he took off his sweater and forced it on to me.
"How cute," he laughed, as he fixed and straightened it.
"Cute? Ha!" I scoffed, shaking my head.
"You're always cute," he said softly, putting his hand on my back.
Long silence soon followed.
We both knew what came next, but it was a question of how to start it.
"Kurama, you said...that you cared about me a lot. But now I know exactly how much that is. And...I don't think...that we should let opportunities pass us by so easily. If we like each other, then we should be together...." I said, moving closer to him until our shoulders met.
"I think you're right," he whispered, wrapping his arm around me. I smiled. Then I yawned, closed my eyes, and rested my head against Kurama.
"I hate being so tired," I sighed, laughing a little.
"Poor thing," he chuckled. "Here," he said, grabbing my shoulders and pushing me away from him. He then lied down on his stomach, looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Come on."
I nearly broke out in laughter, but didn't for lack of energy. So, I crawled over to him, lied down, and hesitantly placed my head on his back.
"Goodnight, Hiei," he said softly, turning his head to look at me.
"You're just going to watch me...?" I asked with a laugh.
"I need to make sure you sleep well," he said quietly.
I began to blush like crazy. Was there nothing else he could have said!?!?!
Oh well, it would be great to finally get some rest. Besides, I could have nothing but good dreams knowing that when I woke up the first thing I would see would be Kurama's loving face....
Dream...
If what Yume said was true, then Kurama wouldn't move things along too fast for me. When helping a friend, you're never out for yourself....
^*^*^
Contrary to what it looks like...no... This was *not* the ending! Actually, at first, I planned on it being...but it's not nonetheless. LOL Anyway, PR!