Disclaimer: I suppose I've probably made my point by now, but anyway…
I don't own any characters except for Geillis and Codanna. Hogwarts and the Forbidden Forest aren't mine, either. The situation, while fairly unoriginal, is mine in regards to what I've done with it.
Chapter 14: Lacrimosa, Dies Illa
"Whatever possessed you to do that, child?" Albus Dumbledore asked her in his office, later that day.
"I couldn't stand it anymore, Headmaster," she said. "Somehow that despicable cad got hold of my favourite handkerchief. He spread rumours that I was another of his worshippers and then, as if that wasn't bad enough, he wrote a note pretending to be Severus and had me meet him in the gardens. He arranged for Severus to arrive just as he forced a kiss on me. If that isn't reason enough to wallop him, then I don't know what is. He's lucky that I didn't shout 'castrato' instead, if you ask me--or better yet, 'hermaphrodito'--"
"That's enough, Geillis," said Dumbledore. "I think I understand. However, I cannot allow this to go unpunished--for either of you. Geillis, I must ask you to do some work for me. As you know, Severus has been asking for an assistant this summer, for research. You will join him, or I will snap your wand."
"But what about Lockhart?" asked Geillis angrily. "He forced me to kiss him--Headmaster, that's practically harassment, if not assault!"
"He will get what is coming to him, I assure you," said Dumbledore. Your choice, Geillis?"
She bowed her head. Her voice sounded tired, defeated. "I suppose that I will have to work with Severus--if he will have me."
Dumbledore smiled. "He'll agree before he knows it," he said.
"Never!" thundered Snape when Dumbledore brought the subject up. "She's a cold, heartless, cruel, sly, scheming minx and I will not have anything to do with her again!"
"Not even when she broke Lockhart's nose on your account, Severus?" asked Dumbledore, quietly.
"She did what?"
"I would not have believed it myself, had I not seen it with my own eyes--you know that she is not a violent person. She was looking for you, Severus, and when she found him, she was very angry. He mistook her flush of anger for one of love, and forced a kiss on her. After you left, she slapped him so hard that he landed on his back. They argued a bit--she said that a single cell in your little finger is worth a million of him, by the way--and then, when he tried to calm her down, she immobilized him and broke his nose with her fist, saying 'this is for Severus'. I had all of the mirrors taken out of his chambers as a punishment for him and on my orders, one of the house elves dropped one, causing it to shatter into tiny pieces which will cause him hours of discomfort--and I told her that either she worked for you or I would break her wand."
Snape sighed. "I must ask that you release her from this, Headmaster," he said. "It does not warrant the breaking of her wand. Lockhart will doubtless be back to normal by tomorrow, but if you snap her wand, she will be ruined for life."
Dumbledore peered at him. "You care enough for her still that you would not see her ruined?"
"Headmaster, there is no doubt that I loved her once, though I believe that I have since dismissed all such notions from my head. However, I would still not have her ruined while that fop gets away with that trick that he played on us."
"But you will not have her to work with you?"
Merlin, no! That would be too much for Snape to bear; pride would not allow him to ask for her forgiveness. "No. She has suffered enough already. Leave her be. Besides, she brews potions with skill not much better than that of Neville Longbottom."
"As you wish, Severus."
"Thank you, Headmaster."
The next month crawled by, slower than molasses in a frozen January night in Northern Ontario. Geillis had simply been told that her services would not be required, and that she would be free to conduct her business as usual.
But she could not. She and Severus had not reconciled after their most recent argument.
They still ate in their accustomed places, but never acknowledged each other--never even looked at each other. Geillis grew to dread mealtimes, and often skipped them if she could. Her already small form became alarmingly frail as the weeks slid by, and Madam Pomfrey began to worry. Professor Sinistra had spared no time in pursuing Snape once Geillis' friendship with him had been destroyed, and this served to further depress the witch. How long would it be until she heard that Severus and Sinistra were, as that rather vulgar slang term went, an item? Her life had once again descended into hell.
There was only one consolation. Gilderoy Lockhart, in the three days before he left for his next publicity tour, gave her a wide berth and did not speak to her unless he absolutely could not avoid it.
Sashara,
Or perhaps I should have called you "Geillis", for that is what I hear that you prefer to be called these days. Forgive me if I have given any offence on this point.
I am deeply sorry for all that I have done to you over the past few years. I have no words to say but that I am most full of regret for all that has happened. I cannot hope for your forgiveness, but I wish that you would at least consent to hear me out. It is my fondest wish to speak with you about everything. I need some form of absolution, and you are the only one who can provide it. Therefore, I ask that you meet me in the forest near Hogwarts, where we may discuss our past and perhaps come to terms with the tragic loss of your much-beloved husband.
I know that we can never again be the friends that we once were, and I realize that after all that I have done you may be most reluctant to trust me. However, I must ask that should you come to see me that you come alone. Secrecy is vital, for my own life has taken a rather dangerous turn, and I am now in constant peril. It is this which has convinced me that I must at least have the chance to beg your forgiveness.
I pray that you might hear my plea and look upon my petition with favour, dearest Sashara. It means more to me than you can ever know.
Most sincerely,
Codanna Tangol
Albus Dumbledore read the letter several times. "I'm afraid that I cannot permit you to go, child. She is too dangerous."
"But I have to go, Headmaster," Geillis said. "This may be my only chance to get rid of her."
He looked at her. "Do you trust her, Geillis?"
She snorted. "Of course not. This woman is totally insane. I know the way she thinks. She thinks that with such an obviously well-thought-out letter as this one is, she can convince me that she is no longer dangerous to me. But I still have to go."
"But why? You know what she is capable of doing."
Geillis nodded. "That's why I have to go. This could be my only chance to capture her, Headmaster. I don't trust her any further than I could throw Hogwarts and the land that it stands on, but I have to go." It occurred to her that she was probably being overly dramatic, but what could she do?
"She has twice attempted to kill you while you've taught here, Geillis, and nearly succeeded. Can you not have somebody else go? Or at the very least, will you not let me send some Aurors with you?"
"Because she specifically sent for me," Geillis said. "If I fail to show up, she may become angry and do something to the school. Psychopaths can be like that. Don't you see, Headmaster? I have to go, and I have to do it tonight. If I don't do something about her, it's likely that nobody ever will. And anyway, I'm the one she's after. There is no need to endanger any other life. If she gets me, then at least everybody else here will be safe from her. You don't know how I've worried since I came here that my presence would cause the death of somebody who had nothing whatsoever to do with the whole dratted mess. Imagine if the classroom had been full when my harp exploded, or if I hadn't been alone when I opened the package with the dart in it."
Dumbledore nodded. "But I still say that I do not give my permission for you to go."
Geillis said, "Then I must inform you that I intend to go even without your blessing. I'm the one she's come for. I will not endanger Hogwarts with the continual threat of her presence. After today, she will be gone, whether I die or capture her." Geillis wouldn't admit it, but she wasn't sure which she preferred. Perhaps she might have been willing to have some Aurors watching among the trees if it hadn't been for the row with Severus…
Dumbledore bowed his head. "Then go, child," he said. "Good luck."
Once he was sure that Geillis was gone, Dumbledore went in search of Snape.
He never found him. As it turned out, Snape heard the voices just before he turned the corner. Where was she going? He ducked into a classroom as she passed, and followed her silently. She hurried out the door into the courtyard, and then made a few quick turns. He realized that she was going into the Forbidden Forest.
He cursed and ran back to his chambers to grab his broomstick. What the hell could she be doing out there? From what he had heard them saying, she was meeting that Codanna. But why? Blast her if she was getting another of her heroic ideas! He'd told her before that she'd end up getting herself killed if she didn't take better care of herself…
He decided not to follow that thought any further. As it was, he flew over the Forest in a panic, trying to discover her destination. Fool, you never should have left her, he thought. Still, he knew that the broom would give them a quick escape if they needed one. Merlin, please let me find her!
As if in answer to his silent plea, he saw a blaze of light on the ground just off to his left. His heart plummeted nearly as fast as his broomstick as he dove down towards it, hoping desperately that it wasn't what he was afraid it was. As he came closer, he saw two female figures. One stood tall, holding her wand and pointing it at the other, who lay writhing on the ground in agony.
The one on the ground was Geillis.
Snape was furious. He whipped out his wand and pointed it at Codanna. "FINITE INCANTATEM! EXPELLIARMUS!" he bellowed. The woman flew back, her spell broken, her wand knocked out of her hand. "Immobilis!" he snarled, and she could not move. He took her wand and broke it, setting it afire with a quick "Incendio". Though it was perhaps unnecessary after having paralyzed her, he nevertheless tied her to a handy tree with magical rope spun from his wand. Realizing that it would work better if she weren't so stiff, he muttered "Ennervate" and tied the rope tighter as Codanna protested.
Then, nearly trembling, he knelt by Geillis. Her wand was still in her hand, but the hand was limp. He felt for a pulse; it was faint. She was alive, but barely.
"Professor Gaerwing! Geillis!" he said hoarsely, his voice barely above a whisper. "If you still can, wake up!"
Her head moved slightly; her silver eyes opened. "Severus," she murmured. "You came."
"Yes, I did. Damn it, you scared me. Don't ever do that again."
"Why should you care?" Getting the words out was a struggle, but she did what she could. "You can't stand to look at me lately. I thought you hated me," she said.
"You were wrong," he said, bluntly. "Now, let's get you back to Hogwarts."
"What about me?" asked Codanna from her tree.
"You can rot in Hell for all I care!" Severus told her, his face cold. "All right, now, Geillis, let's try to get you onto the broomstick."
But she had once again departed from consciousness, and he could not wake her this time.
Snape groaned. How was he to get her back to the school? He finally settled for balancing himself on the broomstick and cradling her in his arms. As a precaution, he enchanted the broom so that neither he nor his passenger could fall off as they rushed back to the school.
The Hogwarts infirmary kept a large window open during the warmer parts of the year in order to keep the air from going stale. Snape flew in, landed, and carried Geillis to Madam Pomfrey.
"What happened?" gasped Poppy as she saw the stricken witch in Snape's arms.
"It was some kind of curse," he said. "My suspicion is that the person who cast it wished to make Geillis suffer as much as possible before dying. I fear I arrived only just in time to prevent the last effects of it from carrying her off."
"Bring her to the private room," Poppy ordered.
He nodded silently and swept into the private room carrying his precious burden.
But when Madam Pomfrey told him to leave, he would not. "I cannot leave her, Poppy," he told her. His voice was strained. It was a hard admission for him to make.
"Poppy…" a weak voice rose from the bed.
"Geillis, you have to rest!"
"I'll rest easier if he's here…let him stay."
"It is against the rules!"
"Bugger the rules…I want him here…if I die, I want him here…I don't want to be alone." Her eyes rested on Snape. "Severus, your pendant…"
"What?" he asked.
"I'm still wearing it. Never took it off."
He was speechless.
"I must tell you…I was too afraid before…"
"Geillis, rest! Tell me in the morning! Save your strength!"
She chuckled dryly. "There may not be a morning for me. I must tell you before the chance is gone."
Poppy, knowing what was likely to be said next, tactfully left the room and closed the door softly behind her.
"Then, what is it?" Snape was almost afraid to hear the words, even as he realized what she was going to say.
"I'm in love with you, Severus." It was barely more than a whisper.
He picked up her hand, not trusting his voice. Finally, he said, "You have the courage to say what I could not. I've been trying to tell you this since Christmas, but I was too afraid. I love you, too, Geillis."
"I know…" she struggled to force the words out, and the effort was so great that she drifted again into unconsciousness.
"Poppy! Get back in here!"
Fire. Fire burned through her, coursed through her veins, brought exquisite agony wherever it touched her.
Ice. Ice followed it, and no matter how hard she tried, she could not warm herself. It enveloped her like a mould.
Pain. Knives of pain stabbed into her, scything, slashing, hacking, twisting, burning. She would have cried out if she had not been so weak.
A soft voice coaxed her into sipping at medicines. She wanted to resist--those things tasted terrible--but she could not. She knew that voice, she trusted it. One of her few lucid thoughts was, If he wants me to swallow these things, then they probably won't hurt me. He knows all about this sort of thing. He would not hurt me, not without a reason.
A strong hand gripped hers. She knew that she was safe.
Severus Snape sat by the bed, holding Geillis' hand. He had barely left her side in the week since he had brought her to the hospital wing. His ordinarily sallow face was grey with exhaustion, he hadn't shaved in a week, and there were dark circles under his eyes. "Is there anything more you can do, Poppy?" he asked, praying that she would say that there was. It was all that he could do to keep his voice from shaking.
"No," she said. "It is all in the hands of fate now. I can do no more."
Geillis floated once more in that blackness so deep that if any light dared to intrude, it would certainly be swallowed up. But no, she was wrong—see, there was a pinpoint of light in the distance, like a star. It got bigger and bigger, coming closer to her—
No! she thought, panicking. I don't want to go! She turned around and tried to escape the light, but it surrounded her and closed in…
The figure on the bed groaned, snapping Snape out of his half-doze. He looked at her and saw a pair of clear grey eyes looking back at him. He took one of her hands in both of his, holding it close to his heart.
"You look like Hell, love," Geillis murmured.
Severus Snape began to laugh.
An unexpected laugh rang out through the hospital wing. Poppy Pomfrey rushed to the private room. Severus tended to scowl even when he was happy—could that laugh mean that something terrible had happened? Grief had been known to elicit stranger reactions, after all.
By the time she reached the room, the laughter had stopped. She opened the door, but closed it softly immediately afterwards. The laugh had stopped, and Severus Snape sat on the bed, kissing Geillis Gaerwing—and she was sitting up, eagerly kissing him in return.
Poppy smiled. She would give the two some time to themselves, and then she would notify the Headmaster that Geillis would live.
A/N: Yet another reason why I was afraid of Mary-Sueism (Mary-Sue-icide?) pops up in this chapter. Still, I hope I managed to get across the thought that Geillis went alone mostly because she was depressed and because she has a regrettable tendency to stick to an idea once it gets into her head, rather than any noble ideas of self-sacrifice or glory or honour or anything of the like. She saw a way out of the problem, and this prevented her from thinking of any other ways that it could be solved—even though they'd have caused her a bit less pain.
Besides, it made for a great excuse to get her and Snape to reconcile. =)
The chapter title is the first line of another movement from the Requiem mass. The title, "Lacrimosa", roughly translates to "weeping", and this seems to be the theme of much of this chapter—sadness, for whatever reasons sadness occurs.
I think that you can probably guess what "castrato" and "hermaphrodito" mean. However, the latter is a spell used in the only mpreg fanfic that I've ever actually liked—"In A Delicate Way" by JayKay. It can be found at http:www. under "Suspicious Muggle Fiction".
Dumbledore's being so unreasonable because he got the urge to meddle in other people's lives, as I've noticed he tends to do.
I know that Lockhart seems to have gotten off lightly, only having his mirrors removed. What he did was reprehensible at best, but consider: Lockhart is completely consumed by his obsession with his own image. To not be able to look at him while he's primping and preening in the morning would be not just an inconvenience—it would take away his best chance to gloat over his looks. Besides, remember that mirror that the house elf dropped? The pieces aren't big enough to see with the naked eye, but they're definitely big enough to worm their way through slippers and shoes, causing horrible degrees of discomfort once they reach the feet. =) And if you've ever had to pick glass out of your feet, I'm sure you'll know what I mean.
Because I haven't given many indications in the text, I feel that I should provide a bit of a timeline to show exactly how much time actually passed. I wanted to show that to Geillis, time was just a big blur—but I didn't want it to be the same for anyone reading this story. Therefore, here it is:
June 20: Students go home via the Hogwarts Express (information taken from the Harry Potter Lexicon)
June 30-July 3 or so: Lockhart hired; he settles in at Hogwarts before going on his book-signing tour
July 7: The Handkerchief incident
July 10: Lockhart leaves on his book-signing tour
August 3: Codanna's letter and the incident in the Forbidden Forest
August 10: Geillis wakes up
P. S. I'm not the weakest link: We must be related. That's the sort of thing that I would do. =) Thanks, though—and green's one of my favourite colours anyway. =)