A/N: This will, ultimately, turn out to be quite AU. It's set in the Sixth Year and has a nice little romance with a heavy dash of angst. THERE WILL BE SPOILERS THROUGH OUT THE STORY. If you haven't read all the books, sorry.
Warnings: Vernon bastardization, character death, self mutilation, slash (male and fem), incest, blood, gore, abuse (note: NOT explicit), depression, suicide. This is NOT A HAPPY STORY and wasn't made to be.
Pairings in this chapter: Ron/Hermione
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not getting money. I wish.
Chapter 2 : No Tomorrow
It was midday when Harry finally awoke. For a long while, he lay still on the floor, broken green eyes gazing out over his room. If he strained them, he could have managed to lift his gaze up to Hedwig's cage. She gazed down at his bloodied body with pity. There was little anyone could do for her master. She had learned this through the five years she'd known him.
He heard no sound from the rest of the house. Petunia had gone out to a friend's again, trusting him to clean her perfect house. That strange trust…Oh yes, trust him to clean and be a slave, but not to actually have human feelings! Watching TV had taught Harry one ironic statement: the years from thirteen to nineteen are the most traumatic years in one's life. No joke. Someday, he wanted to meet who ever first said that and punch them flat.
When he finally lifted himself off the ground, stretching various muscles and evaluating his new bruises, he turned to his sole companion. She looked at him with regret. With a sigh, he opened her cage and let her go.
"I can't do this anymore," he murmured. Hedwig settled on his arm and didn't fight as he brought the bird close to his chest and hugged her gently. She even nuzzled under his chin, giving as much comfort as she could.
"The prophecy is wrong," he continued quietly, brushing his fingers across her feathers. She hooted sadly against his skin. "I can't be the one, 'Wig. I'm not strong enough. I can't do this. I might as well just…"
He paused and lifted his head. It was so clear. So simple. Why hadn't he ever thought of it before?
"…go to him…"
Looking around the room, his eyes landed upon the Journal. Three friends buried since Sirius and he hadn't been able to go to any of their funerals. No, it wasn't safe for him to leave and grieve those friends.
Why had those three friends been targeted? Why had the fourth name been targeted?
"They'd stop dying," he whispered, eyes wide in realization. It was so very simple! Harry dropped his gaze to the snowy owl, feeling a reason to smile for the first time in longer than should be allowed. With careful steps, he went to the window and opened it. "Hedwig…Go to Ron. He'll take care of you, I promise…"
He hugged the owl again and let her go. Hedwig paused only a moment before she took wing and flew away. Harry watched her until she was out of sight. He noted how dark the sky was for early afternoon. Idly, he hoped Hedwig would reach the Weasleys before the storm broke.
Harry retrieved his wand from the loose floorboard. In the beginning of the summer, he'd stowed his books and such there under the cover of darkness. The books would remain there. He had no need of them. Really, he didn't need the wand either but…Something made him get it anyway. He also took his school robes, changing into the familiar lengths of black cloth. If he was going to do die, he wanted to be found as a wizard, not a powerless muggle.
Not powerless.
A sudden rage flared up in his soul. He was not powerless. He should never have let those muggles control him. He should never have let Vernon beat him. He should never have let Vernon…The rage grew as he remembered that helpless moment when Vernon… when he…
The mirror shattered. Harry ignored it. His fists were shaking, clinched so tightly that the skin was beginning to break. Cracks formed in the walls, etching farther out with every second.
He wanted to destroy it all. He wanted them to pay.
Harry left his room. With each step, something shattered. Windows, mirrors, vases… When he reached the kitchen, every single plate exploded. A few pieces of flying porcelain cut his skin, but he couldn't feel it. The glass table was next, large shards rocketing outward to break the windows. His narrowed eyes jerked to the fireplace and it too met a loud end, bricks flying and embedding themselves into the plaster walls. Then he closed his eyes and let everything go. All around him, walls began to crumble and shake. Creaks ran through the ceilings as plaster fell to the floor. His anger ripped and tore at the house.
Harry went to the door, ignoring the crashes as the kitchen ceiling fell completely, chunks of the walls coming down with it. He opened the door and stepped out of the house just as the roof fell in on the second floor. He was down the street before the entire thing fell into ruin. A light rain had started amid his destruction. It was a warm rain, almost comforting. The water droplets easily soaked into his clothes and hair, cooling him. The rage broke and Harry Potter stood very still in the middle of the street, his head lowered and broken eyes staring downward.
There was nothing left to destroy. His rage was finished. So he began to walk. Time passed and the rain fell harder as the world darkened, night growing closer still. He walked on, never lifting his head nor moving from the street. Cars honked at him and moved to go around, angry drivers yelling out. He ignored them. Gradually, the cars thinned out as he left the city. Open countryside surrounded him.
"Hello, Potter."
His feet stopped and his head lifted. A lonely boy of sixteen stared at the being that wished him dead. Those eyes glowed with amused malice and his wand was lifted. Harry merely watched him. All around them, black cloaked figures were apparating, but he didn't care. This was what he wanted. What he needed.
Hermione's face flashed through his mind. He closed his eyes and turned away from the creature before him. Ron's smile followed Hermione's. They had never been far from each other, even less so after they finally got together.
"Why have you not drawn your wand, Potter?"
Harry looked at him again, letting his eyes drift over the monster's form.
"Why fight it?" he murmured in reply. "You'll kill me anyway."
Voldemort smirked widely. "I will."
"So do it."
There were murmurs through the black cloaks, suspicions and wonderings. Harry's head began to ache as he tried to filter them out. He suddenly realized they weren't speaking aloud.
"So be it, boy. You have disrupted me for far too long…"
He watched the wand being positioned, then those pale lips begin to form the first of those two deadly words…And then the whole scene exploded into action.
Wizards popped into existence everywhere, throwing curses and hexes immediately. The Death Eaters fought back at once and bodies fell to the ground. Harry watched all of this, his eyes wide in horror as he saw more people die because of him.
"No more waiting, boy! Avada Kedarva!"
Harry turned his head and watched as the green jet came screaming at him. It moved almost in slow motion, but he could do nothing to stop it. And then…A flash just as it hit him. He screamed as pain streaked through him. His vision began to darken as his body fell.
Harry was unconscious before he could see the spell rebound for the second time and hit it's caster. He didn't know how the battle was one by those of the Light and that so many Death Eaters, if not killed, were put away in Azkaban for good. He knew nothing of the careful spells cast over the body of Voldemort by Albus Dumbledore, nor of the extermination of that body. No, Harry was caught in a sleep of near death and knew nothing but the calming darkness and soothing quiet.
He didn't wake up until three weeks later.
A/N: Shorter than the last, but I wanted to end it here. I know I just posted the first chapter (which took me about six months of ranting to do) but this one just flowed...And I did say updates would be sparatic. Since my life is angsty now (as angsty as a normal 16 year old's life can BE, mind you) I'll probably have chapters up rather often.
I wanted to thank my reviewers. You guys made me feel like a million bucks, man...^_^ Keep up those reviews, and I might just write this story within a year.
See you next chap. Let's speculate on what Harry's lost in this battle...