Disclaimer: Trebond, Alanna, George, Jon, Coram… none of the characters or locations belong to me. Of course, Alanna's thoughts do not belong to me – they belong to… Alanna. Lolz.
Well, It's been quite a while, hasn't it? With homework and other commitments, I seem to have left this story for almost a year! [Oiy…] I hope you haven't forgotten me, heh?
For those who need a little reminder:
The political situation with Tortall is not well. Raoul of Goldenlake and his group of the King's Own have gone to defend the Eastern boarders from Tusaine invasions. Jon and Co. are at Trebond, a strategic location for the enemy – to stop Scanran attacks.
Thayet has refused Jon's offer of marriage, saying she loves him, but not enough to marry him.
Alanna has asked George to give her more time in regards to his offer for her hand.
She also made a fool of herself in front of old friends on her first day back from the desert, being unaccustomed to wearing a dress. [See last chapter.]
Doubts
High, rough stone walls stretched up – sprouting from the trampled earth of Trebond grounds. She followed its course with her violet eyes, until they found the jagged line, where the stone wall met tranquil, soft blue sky.
Alanna pushed her hands against the steel railing, clenching them around the bar until the ghastly white of her knuckles could be clearly seen. Standing on the topmost balcony of her old home, she could almost see over the wall – but not quite. Her eyes travelled restlessly around the rugged, yet beautiful terrain of the spacious Trebond courtyard. Clumps of fir and spruce were scattered at random around the yard, sprinkled with tiny gardens and dotted with natural rock.
She breathed in the cold, mountain air, and exhaled slowly, easing the air between her lips. It had been five years since she had visited this rocky fortress, and in that time span, Trebond had changed drastically. The old fortress seemed no longer like her home, but instead, felt like a cage. The old walls that once felt strong and protective now seemed to imprison her within a tiny space.
What happened? Alanna wondered uneasily, Trebond used to feel so roomy. It used to feel like – home.
It no longer did. The peaceful serenity had been replaced by dozens of worn out, frustrated foot soldiers – the fresh air tainted with the smell of smoke and alcohol. Dinner was little more than a war council with food provided. There was no warmth – no Lord Alan, no Coram – no Thom.
Ever since her arrival at Trebond a week ago, Alanna had been restless – irritated. She felt stifled – no longer able to breathe properly.
Suddenly, her death grip on the railing relaxed, and her whole body sagged in defeat. Perhaps it wasn't Trebond that had changed – perhaps it was herself. She was a knight – the King's Champion. She had travelled all the way to the Roof of the World and back, and had lived to tell the tale. She had killed the powerful Duke of Conté – twice. Surely that was worth something. Was she, Alanna of Trebond and Olau, the same innocent girl who had lived here all those year ago?
A tanned hand landed beside hers, as the Baron of Pirate's Swoop joined her at the balcony, breaking through her reminiscences. She tensed as she felt the air beside her flutter with his movements.
"What's on my Lioness's mind?" He teased, his voice light and casual. It was the way an old friend might greet another.
The Lady Knight did not look at him, yet her body relaxed, resuming the unguarded and vulnerable position it had been before his interruption.
George was the only one who came to talk with her lately – and even he had kept their conversations to a light chatter. The only times she saw Jon or Gary were during mealtimes and meetings, and people only came to her private chambers for advice on the war effort. Thayet had gone with a small scouting company of the King's Own, her accuracy with a bow earning her a welcomed position. Alanna felt useless – all she could do was wait, wait until the enemy made the first move.
How she loathed that.
Hot tears prickled at the corners of her eyes – an excessively annoying habit that had seemed to increase over the past month. Soft and silly, that's what I'm becoming, Alanna thought furiously.
"Alanna?" George gazed at her with concern; voice no longer a light lilt. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing!" She angrily brushed a few escaped tears from her cheeks, lips trembling slightly with the effort to keep the rest from spilling over. Seeing George raise his eyebrows in disbelief, she added in a softer tone; "It's nothing I can't handle by myself, anyways."
Refusing to be wrong footed, the Baron reached for her, his hazel eyes deepening, boring into her like a drill. Sometimes she wondered whether he had a dragon's eyes – ever changing, always unsettling. Her body froze, and the air cackled with pressure.
Seeing the Lady Knight stiffen at his touch, he dropped his arms from their secure embrace around her, and took her hands.
"Don't you trust me yet, Alanna?" He asked softly. "Nothing you don't want to happen will happen."
"I do, George! I do!" Alanna said in a fierce growl. "I just…need more time." She turned away from him, away from his enquiring gaze – not wanting him to see her weak.
He hid a sigh. "The time is yours, Alanna." Chuckling, he teased once more. "I've come to bid th' Lioness farewell, least she bits m' head off."
"Goodbye?!" She turned to him incredulously. "You're leaving? Where to? We just got here a week ago!" Sounding just like a young child, Alanna chided herself.
The time, George placed his hands firmly on Alanna's shoulders, and drew her towards him, searching her eyes intently. "We can't afford to let th' Scanrans get ahead. You must know th' golden plan of any war is to stay one step ahead of th' enemy." He said slowly. "As it stands, Jon doesn't know enough of their plans to begin a possible counterattack, and with so few able-bodied soldiers, we can't afford t' take risks."
"What?!" Alanna's violet eyes fairly blazed, and she trembled with fear and anger. "George, it's far too dangerous! I'm sure Jon couldn't have agreed to this folly!" She protested vehemently. "The Scanrans play for keeps! If they capture you, that's the end! We'll never see you again! I'll - "
He silenced her outrage with a hand over her lips. A lock of soft, brown hair fell over his eyes as he bent closer to her. "The I mustn't get caught, my Lioness." He whispered, "I used to rule the Rogue. You should know that of all people, I would never get caught."
The words were fallacious. This was a dirty war – and there were no guarantees. But she looked liked she needed to hear them.
Gently, the Baron of Pirate's Swoop leaned in and kissed her once on each cheek. His caressing lips lingered before reluctantly pulling away. "I'll be back, Alanna. Wait for me." It was a simple, parting farewell. No significance attached.
She sighed. When had he become so distant? She wondered. If it as if we are nothing more than platonic friends…
Alanna immediately erased this thought with a quick frown. What am I THINKING? She thought in disgust. I was the one who asked for more time!
By the time she turned towards the doorway, George had already disappeared through it, leaving her full of doubt.
I'll be back.
She stood there, statue-like, watching with despondent eyes, fiery hair glowing enough to rival the sun's own wrath. She wished now, more than ever, that Thom, or even old Coram was here with her now. It was hard to notice the changes upon the battlefield, but here, in her old home, their absence became more significant in her heart. They, at least, were stable support for her.
They had never unsettled her, the way George did.
The way Jon did.
Her stomach growled, and she could smell the grease in the air, coming from the mess hall where the soldier had their meals. Just beyond the bend of the first tower, Alanna could see tiny tendrils of smoke, and could hear faint shouts of the men.
It must be past dinnertime now, but her restlessness and disquiet mind pushed away all thoughts of food. She simply could NOT march down there, pretend nothing was wrong, and sit through another 3 hours of war talk. The very thought of it was torturous, and made her stomach clench. If only Thayet was here, she would have someone to confide in, at least.
Thoughts of where the raven-haired girl was now sent Alanna to the stables, where she quickly saddled her mare. A ride amongst the trees now would do her mind good. She would be allowed to forget about George, about Jon, about the mounting war with Scanra. She would be able to feel the wind against her face, and for a few hours, feel like a carefree knight out in search for adventure.
A quick word with the sentry on duty at the smallest of the passes, she trotted through the gates of the old fortress, leaving her fears and uncertainties behind the imprisoning, stone wall.
The setting sunlight blinded her eyes as she looked ahead, but years away from home had not erased her memory of pleasant rides along the Trebond Trial. Fondly, she recalled the times hiking along this trail with Thom, and finally, to cap off their adventure, she would dunk him under the cool waters of the Birch Lake. He hadn't liked that very much.
A smile tugged at the corner of her lips, as Moonlight carried her through the thickening trees. How could she have been so stupid as to forget about Birch Lake? The small lake had been her sanctuary back in those days she had called Trebond her home. To escape a lesson on her Gift from Maude, a lecture from her nurse on the finer points of being a lady – to escape the negligence of an uncaring father, this was her comfort. A secluded lake lined along one side with birches, its serenity was an escape from reality.
Almost unconsciously, Alanna rode in that direction, patting her faithful mare absently, lost in reminiscences of the past. Soon, she could catch glimpses of water, reflecting the warm radiance of the sun.
If only I had thought to come her sooner, maybe I wouldn't have wasted so much time feeling sorry for myself, the Lady Knight grumbled, but feeling her agitation already beginning to dissipate.
Suddenly, she yanked on the reins. Hard. Surprised, Moonlight stopped, pawing at the ground nervously. It had been a long time since her mistress had been so stiff and twitchy in the saddle.
Alanna sat rigidly on her mare, unable to do anything more than blink. A dark stallion stood tethered at the edge of the path, calmly foraging for scraps of edibles. Someone had beaten her to this spot.
Even as he sat with his back to her at the edge of the water, relaxed, credulous, the flaring sun soaking into his charcoal black hair, she knew with a sinking heart who it must be.
Jonathan.
Lady Lucy A/J 4ever – Thank you. Lolz. I tried to slip in the AJ 'romancing bits' discreetly. Haha. Do you think it worked?
White-wolf2 – Haha. Thanks. Hope you enjoyed this one as well, neh?
Drowning Rooster – Well girl – I can't promise you anything, but this chapter is dedicated to you. Rather, the top portion is, with the A/G bits. Lolz. Thanks for the support. :)
Alanna of Conte – Yes, judging from your SN, I can definitely see the AJ fan in you. Lolz. As for Jon and Alanna getting back together – you'll just have to wait and see, hm? And thank you for adding me to your 'Favourites' list. Hugs
Lady Riley of Trebond – Hmm. Not quite your definition of 'soon', eh? Haha. I hope you enjoyed it all the same, and thanks for those lovely compliments.
Lady Slone of Snow Mt – Lolz. You succeeded in making me feel better. However, I have left this story for almost a year – that beats your 10 months, non? Haha. Thanks for your encouragement.
missmagsak - Bows Your wish is my command. Pour vous.
Miya-chan3 – Lolz. I'm afraid I overdid this one. Thanks for leaving a review.
Eridani – Haha. Of course, I quickly came to that conclusion. For short stories, AU stories, I suppose, imitating the author is not a problem – there is no need to. But as this is an extension of SOTL, I wish to stay as 'in character' as possible. Lolz. You are right – Tamora Pierce's style is a bit superficial – but when you put all the books together, it creates an imaginative masterpiece, don't you think? :) Thanks for the support.
Anjirika – Lolz. I love the play on your name, hun. Haha. Thank you for your compliments – indeed, Alanna's temperament is one of the things I like most about her character. :)
Without a doubt, my profound thanks goes to those who reviewed my last chapter. :) My inspiration to start this story was fed by my muse, but you are the ones who keep me sitting in my computer chair, swinging my legs and trying to overcome this stubborn writer's block of mine. :D Hugs
With that said – comments or reviews?