Summary: This Buffyverse is about fifty years or less into the future compared to the norm. Xander is a miner on Mars during the Red Faction rebellion.

Crossover: Red Faction (the PC game), Hellsing (the anime series, also the manga)

Feedback, it makes me write faster. (You know you want to do the feedback thing.)

Pre-Fic Comments:

My idea I got while reading someone's comment will be in here. Please don't kill me.

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Willow hummed happily as she pushed open the door to Giles' bookshop.

"Hey, Giles," she yelled.

"I am in the same room," the British man said dryly from where he was continueing his inventory. "And we have some... good... news. Of a sort."

"Really?," the redhead asked. "Cool! What've we learnt about that cult?"

"Diff thing, Will," Buffy said, from where she was sitting on the counter, cleaning under her nails with one of Giles' slayage knives. "The Xanman is back, with reinforcements."

"Yesss!," Willow said jubilantly. "I knew he wouldn't get killed in that miner rebellion! Well, I hoped really hard, anyway. And it was true! Who came with him?"

"Eos, the leader of the Red Faction from Mars," Buffy said. "And he liked me having Angel around so much that he picked up his own vamp."

Willow pulled a face. "Gross!"

Vampire on human action had been bad enough when it was just Buffy -- now her old friend Xander was a necrophilliac too?!

"You said it," Buffy agreed, thinking to herself that the only good vampire was a dead one.

Willow picked up the snake bone, the only bit of hard proof they'd been able to retrieve from the cult. One of the ends of the bone was stained red, with fresh blood.

"Who cut themselves on this?," she asked.

"Xander," Giles sighed. "Not a minute back and already he's put his oar in."

"He did help run that Red Faction," Buffy pointed out. "He might not be totally incompetant, now."

"He's certainly not totally poor anymore," Willow smiled. The miners on Mars had received hefty compensation from Ultor Corporation. Ultor had not wanted to pay out; the Earth Defense Fleet had amassed enough evidence from Capek's laboratories and confessions from guards that they had had no other option.

"Er, speaking of Xander, it would appear that the man in question has returned," Giles pointed out, gesturing out of the shop window.

The Ford Escort was back, with two large plywood boxes tied to the top. Willow watched as Xander got out, along with a tough looking woman -- Eos, obviously -- and a pale man dressed in a long coat with pronounced canines. Gross times two -- Xander was with a /guy/ vampire?!

Xander whistled as he picked up one end of a box, Alucard holding the other end up. The shop bell tinkled as he walked through it, Eos holding the door open.

"Hey, G-man, Buffster, Wills. Can I stash this in the back? Thanks!"

The witchly hacker watched in bemusement as the two put the box in the large training room behind the shop, then went and got the other box, storing it too in that room.

"Don't I get a hug, Xander?," Willow asked. She was going to reserve judgement on him until she learnt a bit more about his situation.

"Sure," Xander said, giving her a quick, brotherly hug. "Good to see my favourite witch along with my fave Slayer and G-man. Wills, this is Eos. Eos, Wills. And this vamp is Alucard."

Willow looked at the vampire, head slanted. "Why... how is he walking around in sunlight like that?!"

She wished she had some of her spell components here. Giles refused to let his precious bookshop get sullied by a smell other than that of paper and ink.

"I don't know, and he ain't tellin'," Xander shrugged. "Look, we learnt about that cult thing, can you tell us anything about it?"

Willow bit her upper lip gently, her eyebrows bunching together cutely. "Uh, they seem to have some kind of snake fetish, don't go in for the random vampy killing, and they're really good at hiding."

"That's it?," Eos asked, disbelieving.

"Pretty much," Buffy said, feeling left out.

"Don't you know what the name of the cult is, their goals, anything like that?"

"We only just found out about the prescence of the cult recently," Giles stammered. "As Willow said, they are vexingly able at hiding."

Alucard knelt before Xander, who was currently leaning against a bookshelf.

"Order me, my Master."

Willow's mouth dropped open.

"ALEXANDER LAVELLE HARRIS! You're a gay necrophilliac pervert that's into S&M all of a sudden?!"

Xander blushed red. "W-w-w-what?! He's a servant to my family! I don't know why!"

A few seconds passed, before he felt the need to add something.

"And I've never seen him without that suit on!"

"Like, ew!," Buffy said, mental images blooming. "I so don't want to know."

"Come on, guys! I swear it's not like that!"

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Post-fic comments:

Doncha love muck ups like that?