Where Are You Now?
PyroKid
05.23.04

DC belongs to Gosho Aoyama, not me.
Song by Michelle Branch, not me.

Maybe I'll be better on my own
No one ever seems to understand me
It's easier for me to be alone
Until a piece of me that feels so empty
I've been all over the world
I've seen a million different places
But through the crowds and all the faces
I'm still out there looking for you

Maybe I'll be better on my own… I'm that kind of person, the socially inept who spends life in textbooks and research; it's easier for me to be alone. It's easier for me to be alone. Haibara looked out the window at the turbulent outside world, the endless sheets of rain reducing the scene to a grayscale picture. …If it's easier for me to be alone, why do I feel so hollow, so lonely? No matter where I go, I'm always searching the crowds for you; no matter what I do, I'm always sifting my memories for your face… She turned attention from the swaying trees as a flash of lightning illuminated her features.

Where are you now?
I'm trying to get by
With never ever knowing at all
What is the chance
Of finding you out there
Do I have to wait forever?

She opened the window, the roar of thunder increasing in volume.

Where are you, Shinichi? I try to cope with not knowing, but in the recent weeks I've found that I can't. I mean, what are the chances of locating you out there in the world? Do I have to wait forever, in vain?

I write about the things I'll never know
And I find a moment just to slow down
Makes me think I'll never have the chance
To figure out
What it's all about
So tell me
What it's all about

Staring out at the torrents, a memory floated into her mind.

Flashback

She was sitting at the bare desk, typing on the laptop, writing a diary entry. "I don't know where he is, or if he's even alive!" she shouted in a frustrated voice as she rose abruptly from her seat. "…and it's driving me crazy." She finished softly as she slowly walked the five feet to her bedside and sat down, as if shocked by her own acknowledgment. …and the fact that I may never know is slowly killing me… she added mentally, so tell me; give me some sign…

End

Cause
Where are you now?
I'm trying to get by
With never ever knowing at all
What is the chance
Of finding you out there
Do I have to wait forever?

Where are you? Without knowing, every minute seems like a year, every day an eternity. Without a single clue, there's nothing I can do; the reach of the Organization stretches far, into the corners of the world; you could be anywhere…

Where are you now?
I'm trying to get by
With never ever knowing at all
And I still don't know

The thought of never knowing…

The rain continued beating on her face, drenching her hair and soaking her shirt. Turning her face to the heavens, she thought:

Where are you now?
I'm trying to get by
With never ever knowing at all
What is the chance?
Of finding you out there
Do I have to wait
Do I have to wait forever?

Sighing, she turned away, tears streaking her rain-splashed face. Behind her, a shadow rose across the sky in a gathering of dark clouds.