I couldn't do anything. There I stood, in a 40-foot tall suit of transforming armor, and stared at the one I loved heading into the ocean. And I was the one responsible.
"Rick, are you okay?"
I heard vain attempts at communication squawk through the headset, but none of them made any sense. The chopper marked with a red cross made its way into the combat zone, and I stood there, watching. The battle wasn't over, the infantry was making their assault on Seattle Base, and I couldn't move. Tears welled inside my eyes; I was the one who should have been shot down, not her!
I wanted to pull the lever and turn my VT into a fighter, to fly down to the ocean, to make the pain go away. But killing myself wouldn't remove Lisa's hurt; it would only make it worse. Suddenly, I snapped out of my reverie. I had to protect that chopper.
Please get me through, I don't care how;
Don't take my love away, not now! [1]I targeted an LRM volley that was heading towards the MASH chopper. All of the LRM's dissolved under the laserfire. I saw that the tank columns were advancing slowly over the hill, and that the LRM fire was coming nearer. "Max, Miriya, concentrate your fire on the center of the enemy column. Disperse their formations, and the ground forces can pick them off slowly."
"Roger that, boss," came Max's response.
"What about Lisa," Miriya asked.
"You worry about those tanks, I'll worry about the chopper," I snapped.
It was too late for the choppers, however; a submersible vehicle surfaced in the bay, with its cargo module open. I switched to Battloid mode and stood on the cliff overlooking the bay. I picked up my autocannon rifle and aimed at the sub with the sniper mode, but Lisa's pod was too close; the explosion would kill her, if she wasn't…no, can't think that!
Oh, where, oh, where can my baby be?The Lord took her away from me…
She's gone to heaven, so I've got to be good,
So I can see my baby when I leave this world…[2]
The crosshairs settled on the conning tower, and the rebel captain stood on the deck, commanding the retrieval. A mech-sized autocannon round to a human head is not a pretty picture to imagine, but I entertained the thought, as I desperately wanted Lisa back. The targeting light came on, indicating that I had a perfect shot…
Please get free…I'm still with you; wait for me! [1]
The private comm channel clicked. "Rick, are you there?"
Max's voice jolted me out of my misery. "I'm here, Wraith Leader."
"C'mon back to the barn; the rebels are cutting the base off and trying to besiege us."
"In a few seconds, Max, I've got some unfinished business."
I held my aim at the sub captain, then, as he disappeared, at the cargo hoist that was making to take Lisa aboard, then at the sub itself. A direct hit to the forward hold, and she'd founder. I put my finger on the trigger, ever so slightly…
The same channel again. "Rick, come in."
I growled. "Yes, Miriya?"
"What in the blazes are you doing up there?"
"Attempting to neutralize the enemy, as all Academy graduates are taught."
"You're also angling to get yourself killed, Rick. Break off and return to base."
"Negative, Miriya."
"Boss, she's right. You'd better get back, you can get Lisa another time."
I ignored Max, and the next thing I knew, Max and Miriya landed behind me. I looked at them, confused, as they approached me. They each grabbed one of my arms and, picking me up, hit their thrusters, taking me far away from the combat zone, and back within the confines of the base. I looked at Max like he was the boogeyman, and he was somewhere between irate and perplexed. He turned to the face-to-face channel, unrecorded by combat flight ops.
"Why, boss?"
"It was an accident-"
"I didn't mean that," he snapped. "Why were you willing to throw your life away just now?"
"Lisa's gone, and I am the one responsible. I was willing to do anything to bring her back, and to ease the pain I feel."
Let me go, John, I can't leave her;
Why in the world should I be saved instead of her? [1]
"Well, it's not over yet," he said gently. "We can still save her. But you can't do it by getting yourself killed."
It's not you, it's war that's cruel,
And if some dreams get smashed, perhaps its best they were. [1]
I switched to Gerwalk, and allowed the ground crew to pull me out of the plane. My legs were rubber as I crossed over the tarmac, and I felt Max and Miriya lending me support as I walked. "By the way, boss, Barton doesn't know what happened up there; your secret is safe with us."
I nodded distractedly, and we stumbled to the war room. "Captain, it's good to see you," Barton began. "I'm sorry we lost Captain Hayes, she is a good pilot, and it's a tough one."
"Thank you, colonel," I said, numbly. The rest of the time we were in the room, which, mercifully, wasn't long at all, Max did all the talking. Then, he led me back to an abandoned lounge, posting the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the door. He left, and I was alone for a few hours, not ever quite asleep but never fully awake. After a few hours, he returned.
"Where's Miriya?"
"She had to discuss something with the colonel. Now, tell me straight, boss, were you really going to kill yourself over this?"
"I wanted to end the pain, and I wanted to get her back, Max. It's like an energy thing, it's not purely emotional anymore. I just wish that I could have taken her place, have it be my plane that got hammered, not hers."
"You made a mistake, boss. She's alive, she'll make it. But we need to get her out of Howe's clutches, that's for sure."
"You get her; I doubt that she'd be too happy to see me after I damn near killed her."
Miriya entered the room at this point and sat down in the chair directly opposite me. "Rick, you need to calm down, and you need to come back to reality. We need you here."
"You don't need someone who butchers his own men, especially one who butchers his loved ones."
She grabbed me by the shoulders and said, "Rick, I'm going to help you calm down, and I'm going to get you to relax and get your confidence back. Look into my eyes."
Unwillingly, I looked, intending to satisfy her command for a second, and was drawn in, like a magnet to a ships' hull. "A pilot knows three truths about his trade; one, that he is not impervious to the enemy; two, death is his companion, but it does not alarm him, because he must conquer death in the performance of his trade; and three, his safety and well-being is secondary to those he must protect and defend.
"He could have to lay down his life at a moment's notice, and there's nothing he can say that could change it. Conversely, he should never throw his life away recklessly. But the defense of the innocent and the safety of others is your first priority. You must rescue Lisa. Barton gave his permission; you can leave to get her anytime you want. Now go get her."
As Miriya spoke, I could feel my anxiety slip away, dropping to my toes and beyond, a discarded cloak. I gained, if not a renewed confidence, then a determination to get Lisa free. It was as if a trance had gripped me, and I welcomed it, for it gave me focus and took away my fear. I said, "Thank you, Miriya, I needed that."
"In Zentraedi, it is called shakragewehr. It means renewed determination."
"Thank you."
I stood up and walked a little easier, heading toward the war room again. Max followed behind me. Isn't this becoming a routine of mine, I thought half-amusedly. Barton took me aside as I entered the room, half whispering.
"Captain Hunter, it's good to see you back on your feet again," he said. "I'm sorry if I seemed callous earlier, but I am aware of your emotional attachment to Captain Hayes and I fully intend to assist you in freeing her from Maistroff's clutches."
"Thank you, Colonel. What's the plan?"
"Well, we'll send out a high altitude drop plane to get you two to within ten miles of the coast, and send you in on a HAHO, or High Altitude High Opening, drop. The HAHO will allow you to use the parachute to coast the remaining distance to Macross City. After that, it's up to you how you get in and get out. Secondary mission objectives may include rescuing the SDF-1 bridge crew, and securing Maistroff's plague."
"Do I require any special equipment for this?"
"Dr. Chang, our R&D specialist, sent along a box of specialized ammunition for your MOG. Red tipped projectiles explode upon impact; blue tipped ones are for fast-acting poison. There are also compressed air canisters that fire weighted nets, to incapacitate a large group of soldiers. We'll also give you the usual assortment of flash-bangs and flechette grenades. But this is your new toy; an ARES FMG submachine gun."
He handed us each a small box, about the size of a CD player faceplate box. "Is this some sort of joke?"
"Not at all. You unfold this box into a 50.3 cm long submachine gun, with a barrel length of 18.7 cm. It can fire single shot, three, five, or eight shot bursts, or fully automatic. And it holds 32 rounds of 9mm ammunition, so you should have no problems coming up with covering fire should you need it."
A large explosion rocked the base. "Colonel Barton, Howe's men have hit the fuel dump and the external comm lines. They're making for a massive assault."
"Looks like our plan will have to be put on hold, captain," he said. Then, he raised his voice, "Load all disabled mechs and spare parts on the first cargo carriers. Then we evacuate the wounded. All units who are still able stand your ground and cover the evacuation. We will never surrender."
AN: Thank you all for your kind words and your encouragement. This project is looking like it will become a trilogy, after all. There's just too much to cover, too many ideas to share, and not enough space. By the way, the first song quoted was "Fall of Saigon" from the musical "Miss Saigon" and the second was J. Frank Wilson's version, (the original, I believe) of the song "Last Kiss". Maybe one of the wiser and saner heads on this site will have the time and inkling to take note of all the songs we've referenced and compile a "Rick and Lisa Songbook". Me, I prefer the oldies, and a lot of older rock, along with some newer stuff. But, as always, review and recommend. I love input, and I love writing for an audience. I'm sure you all feel the same way. Which reminds me, some of you have not posted in quite a while. (You all know who you are) It would be pleasing to see some other posts, and I'll review them as soon as they are available.