-THE LOVE LETTER
CHAPTER 8 : Letters
Lavinia's reaction wasn't the most expected one. She didn't feel angry or sad or even jealous. She simply didn't feel. What she had just found out was surprising but at the same time, it was the kind of thing her predictable husband would do. His disinterest and lack of consideration were enough to make one wonder about something like that.
She walked home calmly deciding what to do next. Perhaps she wouldn't do anything, it wasn't like she cared. She was amazed how that was an eye opener about her true feelings toward him and her whole marriage. She didn't care.
She got inside and threw herself in the couch, brushing the sweat from the hot sun outside. She was feeling like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders, like she was released from a big responsibility. She gazed at her fireplace and with a smile she went for it. Finding the box in place she grabbed it and opened to find his reply.
Her heart skipped a beat and in seconds she had the letter opened.
""" Dear Liv,
I'm can't express how happy I am that you have decided to continue on writing.
You have asked about my life, and there is a lot of things about my world that you don't know and I shall tell you all about it with time. Things haven't changed much in 30 years, at least not for me.
I can say that I lead a lonely life as a Professor of chemistry. My friends are my books and my work. I'm not what you could call a social person and I don't really intend to be one. I believe this already answers your question about me having someone in my life. I'm afraid not many people would appreciate my company. And yes I think our connection means we are seeking for the same thing.
I do not judge you for wanting a better life, you have all the right in the world to long for happiness and true love. A woman with your mind and view of the world deserves to find someone who can see how wonderful you are.
Please write soon.
Severus. """
She was overjoyed. All the events of the day melted into nothingness as she read Severus words. He was so intriguing and so much like her. She didn't care how absurd or even impossible this whole thing was . Even though it was so soon, she had no fear or doubts in her heart that this was the man for her
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""" Dear Severus,
I don't understand why you say not many people would appreciate your company. I find you to be the most interesting man I have ever had the chance to talk to, even if it's just through letters.
I too have no desire to socialize for I believe people do not understand me. I have given up trying to make them do it a long time ago. People will never cease to disappoint me.
You see, my husband is having an affair.
I know I should say I am appalled and angry, but I can't help but feeling relieved. Perhaps I'm crazy or perhaps I was feeling guilty for entertaining the idea of finding someone... someone like you.
If only we didn't have the barrier of time between us...
Write soon,
Liv. """
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""" Dear Liv,
I am deeply sorry that you have to go through this, it truly angers me to think that a man will treat a woman like you this way. I'm sorry if I, again, try to meddle into your private life, but why don't you leave him?
I know it's not my place to advise a woman in such affairs, but I've come to care a great deal about you. It saddens me that our lives are so ironically apart, and I wonder if this is another cruel joke of destiny, to bring you into my life and not allow me to reach you.
Yes my dear, not many people will enjoy my company. I'm a difficult man to be with and for too long I've believed that there would be no one suited for me. That is, until I read your letters.
Give me time, I might be able to find a solution.
Please be careful, do not trust him. Write soon,
Severus. """
Lavinia read the letter many times again and couldn't understand what Severus meant. How could he find a solution? She sighed and paced around, unable to contain her excitement.
Severus was very secretive about his world, she had a feeling he was hiding something very important and that might be the answer for what he had mentioned in the letter. She couldn't even bring herself to think it was impossible anymore... their 'exchanging letters through time' was already insane enough.
With that, she started to write her reply.
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Snape had owled his friend in the Ministry several times, and he hadn't been lucky in locating the whereabouts of the couple or their relatives. He needed to know what had happened to Lavinia in order to move on with his plan. Dumbledore would not approve and probably forbid what he had in mind, but he needed to find a way to make it possible.
His friend in the Ministry had assured him that he would find them, it would take time though.
They kept exchanging letters through the days and weeks ahead and the letters became more and more passionate. He wasn't able to go through a day without reading her words anymore, it was more than an obsession, he was afraid to admit it for a long time, but it was obvious to both of them. They had fallen in love.
She said it wasn't that easy for her to leave her husband, she had nowhere to go, her family wouldn't accept her back and she didn't have many options of work at the time, specially not having gone to college. Those times must have been difficult on women in the muggle world.
He felt so helpless, and he didn't have a good feeling about her husband.
Snape had a lot going on in his head and term was about to start. He needed to prepare classes and there was not much time to think anymore. Plus he had been called by Voldemort twice that summer. The meetings were getting more frequent, taking a good part of his time, not to say it was extremely dangerous to be around the Dark Lord in the weak state of emotions he found himself in lately.
It was on the first day of term that he received one of Lavinia's letter with a picture of her enclosed. He was amazed as he looked at her face for the first time. She was beautiful. She had nothing special nor was she attractive. But in his eyes she was beautiful, and that was all he could think. It was a black and white muggle picture, probably taken by a professional photographer. It showed her only from the shoulders up and she was smiling, a very shy smile. Her hair was dark brown and fell into soft waves to her shoulders, her eyes were hazel and sad, the smile didn't seem to reach her eyes. There was something quite remarkable about those eyes, they seemed to pierce right through him.
She asked if he could send a picture of him and he was a little apprehensive about it. First he couldn't send her a wizard picture and then what if she didn't like his appearance? He sighed deciding he would think about that later. He went to his classroom to wait for the students and sat behind his desk to finish reading the letter. There was a poem in the envelope, he didn't know any muggle authors and was very surprised at how interesting this one was.
""" Enclosed is one of my favorite poems by Poe and I don't know why but it's how I see my life, us... I think some poems just speak to us in ways we can't explain. """
Snape looked inside the envelope and found the poem.
""" A Dream within a Dream """
Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow -
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream
I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of golden sand -
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep - while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see and seem
But a dream within a dream? """
Snape smiled thinking how curious that poem was and it suited her somehow. His musings were interrupted by the arrival of the students. He quickly stuffed the letter inside the drawer and stood up to start his class.
It was the usual Gryffindor / Slytherin class. Lots of points taken from Gryffindor, Longbottom's messy mistakes and a few detentions. Overall, the usual. At the end of the class the students put their bottled potions on his desk and left. He couldn't wait to look at Liv's picture again but know-it-all Granger kept asking him questions.
When he finally had managed to satisfy her curiosity and she was leaving, she spotted something on the floor.
"Is this yours, Professor?" she said handing him a piece of paper while reading its contents.
She snorted and he grabbed it out of her hand with a glare. "What's so funny, Miss Granger?"
"Oh, nothing Professor, it's just that this is really the kind of thing you would read," she said shyly.
He cocked his head and narrowed his eyes waiting for her to elaborate on that.
She sighed. "It's Edgar Allan Poe... this poem. I thought that if you ever were to read muggle literature, it had to be Poe, it suits you."
"Thank you for the enlightening opinion, Miss Granger," he said sarcastically. "Now if you'll excuse me I have better things to do."
As she left, he shook his head and looked down at the poem, the corners of his mouth twisting up in a smile.
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