Daphne: Alright, I have no idea why the last chapter came out like that. I
think it had something to do with FF.com, because I saw other stories that
came out just like mine. So I am trying one more time, and if this chapter
works, I will try to fix chapter nine, ok?
Thank you for all the reviews, and thank you for your patience. My computer monitor broke, and we had to get a new one, so I haven't been able to get on for the past two days! Bummer, huh?
Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please continue to review!!!
~*~*~*~
JUST BREATHE
by: Daphne Li
Chapter 10.
~*~*~*~
"Miss Hilde?"
It had been almost a month since the scene in the garden, but none of the children had forgotten it. This particular day, the rain had kept them from going outside, so they were stuck in the school room. They had been allowed half an hour of quiet time, to do as they liked, and the children had begun to think back to that day in the garden.
"Yes, Deluce?"
"Why did you call Uncle Kojii by his real name? That time, in the garden?" She asked softly. Hilde caught her breath and bit her lip, an action which was not missed by the sharp eyed Chang, who raised an eyebrow.
"I was upset. I shouldn't have done it." Hilde murmured. Xiaolong frowned.
"But how did you know his name?" He asked. Hilde sighed.
"I'm sure that you know about my sister going to school with him when they were younger...don't you?" At her words, the children shook their heads. Hilde sighed again.
"Well...she did. And they weren't very friendly towards each other."
"They didn't like each other?" Ying-fa asked.
"They *hated* each other. But one day, my sister asked me to switch places with her. I did, and I met Kojii...Li-sama, there." Hilde explained. Deluce had now slid to her side, and placed her hand into Hilde's. Ying-fa had taken to resting her head on Hilde's lap, while Chang sat on the desk across from them. Xiaolong sat on the floor next to Ying-fa, with Akito close by his side.
"What was Uncle Kojii like, back then?" Xiaolong asked. Hilde smiled, remembering.
"At first he was a perfect horror, always trying to get under my skin and make fun of me. Then, I became sick, and was forced to stay at his house. It was at that time when I realized that he was actually quite nice, just a little mischievous. When Meilei and I became good friends, he started warming up to me...but remember, this was when I was acting as my sister. Meilei had figured out our secret, but Kojii...he hadn't." Hilde went on. The children's smiles faded.
"I knew that if my sister came back, she would hurt him by telling him that she had never liked him. So, I decided to tell him I had 'changed' as a deal with a friend, and I pushed him away. According to Meilei, he was never the same after that. I suppose...I suppose that I am the one who made him the way he is now." Hilde murmured, her tears near the surface.
Poor little Ying-fa began crying softly, and the boys were looking stunned by the end. Deluce buried her head into Hilde's shoulder and hugged her tightly.
"It wasn't your fault. It wasn't." The girl's voice was muffled.
"'Lucy is right. It was not your fault." Xiaolong stated, using Deluce's nickname. The two younger children nodded sharply, and Chang simply frowned, obviously agreeing with them.
"Poor Uncle Kojii. Poor you, Ms. Hilde." Ying-fa whimpered, hugging her teacher's knees. Hilde smiled at the children's support, and her smile made them all feel better.
"Thank you. But you know...I think your school time is just about over!" Her words raised a happy cheer from the children, and they quickly went to put their things away, completely forgetting their sorrow.
None of them noticed a pair of amber eyes watching them through the slightly-open classroom door.
~*~*~*~
"Shy-by!" Came a cry from over the line. Hilde had just called her sister, and obviously, Heidi was more than willing to talk.
"Hello to you, too, Dee." Hilde laughed, using her sister's nickname.
"How are you doing? How is Meilei? Are you having fun teaching?" Heidi shot questions as soon as she thought of them. Hilde laughed.
"I am fine. She's doing well. Yes, lots of fun." She answered jokingly. Heidi let out a laugh.
"So, who are your latest students?" She asked. Hilde paused.
"Um...I'm tutoring a group of cousins." She admitted hesitantly. Heidi made an exasperated sound.
"Yes, but who are they?"
"Meilei's young cousins. There are five of them, and they all live at the Li family home..."
"WAIT! Back up, Shy-by! You mean to tell me, that you are working in a place that you can see Kojii Li every day?" Her sister asked, shocked. Hilde winced.
"I've only seen him once...and that was with his *fiancee* and her father." Hilde explained. Heidi snorted.
"Fiancee? Who would want to marry him?"
"It's an arranged marriage. Her name is Shayla Roderick. Her father, Robert Roderick, used to know mother." Hilde explained. Heidi gave a gasp.
"Hilde! Do you know who he is?" She choked out. Hilde frowned.
"No. I know that he was mother's friend..."
"He was never her friend! He was that man who was so obsessed with her, he tried to rape mother!" Heidi shouted. Hilde gasped and collapsed into a chair.
"What?!" She managed.
"It's true. Hilde, you'd better watch out. He might just come after you, he was so obsessed with mum." Heidi advised. Hilde groaned.
"Dee, he's obviously married, and he has a daughter..."
"Who is probably as crummy as he is..."
"HEIDI! Be serious, please! I wonder if we should tell the Li's this."
"Heck no! Hilde, if we did, what evidence could we give them to prove anything. Just lay low for right now. Try to find out her mother's name. Perhaps that would help." Heidi suggested. Hilde wrinkled her nose.
"You are too much, sister-dear."
"I know. I know."
~*~*~*~
"Miss Hilde, grandma said she wanted to talk with you after school." Akito stated, as he and his cousins settled into their seats in the pavilion. Hilde looked up, alarmed.
"Oh?"
"Yes. She wants to meet you." Deluce added, her eyes sparkling. Obviously she knew something that the other's did not.
"All right." Hilde murmured, getting out her teaching book. Ying-fa and Akito had their lessons first, today, while the others worked on their spelling. While Hilde was busy with the two twins, she failed to notice Deluce sneaking away, nor the girl's timely return, just before Hilde turned her attention back to the older three.
Finally, lessons were through, but for once, the children stayed and helped to clean up. Then they led their teacher back into the house.
"Grandma's waiting for you in the tea-room. I'll show you." Deluce offered, taking Hilde's hand and leading her down a long hall that Hilde had never been in, as the other children turned down another hallway, looking over their shoulders as they went. Deluce and Hilde stopped as they came to a big set of oak-wood doors, and Deluce opened one.
"She's here, grandma." The girl called. There was a slight laugh from inside.
"Well, let her in, child. Don't keep her standing out there." Came a soft, strong voice. Deluce grinned at these words and quickly pulled her teacher into the room.
"Here she is! She looks just like the picture you showed me of her mother, grandma!" The girl exclaimed. Hilde looked confused, and then she turned her eyes to the woman in the room.
Yelan Li was sitting in a straight-backed chair, her long black hair pulled up into its elegant knot and her hands folded calmly in her lap. Her face was serene, but it held a hint of a steely air in it.
"Come in, dear. Don't be shy." Yelan murmured, motioning to the chair next to her. Hilde smiled and sat down, Deluce quickly taking a seat on the floor by her feet. Yelan looked at the young woman carefully, and then smiled.
"You look just like your mother, Hilde. Is she still in the fashion industry?" Yelan asked, pouring two cups of tea and handing one to her. Hilde nodded.
"She is. She loves it too much to simply leave." Hilde laughed. Yelan smiled.
"You know, all of my grandchildren speak highly of you...especially Meilei." Yelan chuckled at this, and Deluce shot her a small glare.
"I speak higher, grandma!" She pouted. Hilde laughed and stroked the girl's hair.
"Yes, I'm sure you do. But the only person in my whole family who does not seem to speak about you much, is my grandson, Kojii." Yelan murmured, watching Hilde closely. The girl's face turned pale, and she bit her lip sharply, causing Yelan to wince slightly as she caught sight of it.
"Oh?" Hilde asked, weakly. Yelan nodded, slowly pulling the girl into the trap she had laid. No, this wasn't a bad sort of trap...it was more of a information-grabbing trap.
"Yes. Yet, although he doesn't *speak* of you, he seems to know more about you than any of them. Just the other day, in fact, the children were trying to figure out what you smelled like, and he informed them that you smelled of 'vanilla and lavender'. And I must say. He was right." Yelan laughed, taking a delicate sniff at the girl. Hilde flushed bright red.
"I do not know how he could know." She murmured. Yelan raised an eyebrow.
"Oh, you don't? Deluce, will you go and ask the cook what we are having for supper?"
"But grandma..."
"Now, Deluce." Yelan commanded. The little girl frowned and stomped from the room, her brown hair swinging as she went. Yelan then turned to Hilde.
"You were a lot closer to Kojii than either of you have admitted, weren't you?" She asked in a clipped voice. Hilde winced.
"He was...a friend." She murmured.
"But you felt that you were cheating him, because he didn't know you weren't your sister." Yelan filled in for her. Hilde nodded. Yelan sighed.
"Hilde, you were closer than friends, weren't you? Tell me the truth. What did you feel for him?" Yelan asked, her voice slightly warmer. Hilde swallowed hard and tears neared the surface.
"I...I don't now. I thought we were friends...but then he...and I..." Hilde trailed off, unable to continue. She hung her head and stared at her lap.
"What happened, Hilde?"
"The last day I was in Japan. I had to tell him that the truce was off...he wasn't pleased...but then he kissed me..." At this, Hilde blushed and Yelan looked at her in astonishment. Then Hilde went on.
"He told me that if I was going to 'push him down', that he was going to take me down with him." Hilde murmured, one single tear running down her cheek.
"And he did, didn't he?" Yelan asked. Hilde frowned.
"In what respect?"
"You are still in love with him. And he with you."
"He never loved me." Hilde murmured. Yelan chuckled.
"Child, I think he does. Remember how he used to be? Now look at him now. Don't tell me that 'nothing' made that change. It was you. And you alone can fix it." Yelan stated. Hilde was about to protest when the doors opened again. The two women turned and Hilde caught her breath hard.
There, in the doorway, stood Kojii Li. His face was stony, and his body was rigid.
"Supper is ready, grandmother." He announced, his eyes straying over to Hilde. Yelan noticed this and smiled.
"I will be down in a moment, Kojii. I am just finishing my talk with Hilde." Yelan stated, her eyes twinkling. The young man nodded and turned to go.
"No, you stay here, Kojii. Hilde, it was very nice speaking with you, and I will call you soon, so we can chat more." Yelan murmured, hugging Hilde and placing a kiss on her forehead. Hilde nodded and quickly walked away, not once glancing at the young man in the doorway.
"She is a wonderful girl, isn't she?" Yelan asked. Kojii stiffened even more.
"I wouldn't know."
"Don't even try to deny it, Kojii. I am not blind and I see what has happened. But let me tell you this. She has suffered as much, if not more than you have over this, and it will not do to keep denying it. She tried to as well, but the truth always comes out when I am questioning, my grandson. Remember that." Yelan stated, leaving the room. Kojii stood still, looking at the place where Hilde had once sat.
His eyes were now filled with pain, as he started to walk over towards the chair she had been seated in; pain and many more emotions that he would never allow any other person to see.
"Why? Why did you have to come back and make my life a hell again? Why, Hilde?" He groaned, sinking into the chair and stuffing his face into its cushions.
The faint smell of vanilla and lavender still lingered there.
~*~*~*~
"Ms. Hilde! Ms. Hilde!"
Hilde looked up from the tests she was correcting, and smiled at the tiny Ying-fa. The children had had a half-day of lessons today, and she had stayed to correct the tests they had taken that day.
"What is it, darling?"
"Will you take a walk with me?" The little girl asked eagerly, her black curls bouncing as she shifted eagerly from one foot to the other. Hilde smiled.
"Wait a moment and let me finish correcting Xiaolong's test." She murmured, quickly finishing the grading. Then she placed the test into its proper place and got up.
"Where are we going?" She asked. Ying-fa smiled.
"The gardens. Mommy said I could take you there." She squealed excitedly. Hilde laughed and followed the little girl willingly. Ying-fa led her out into the gardens and past the pavilion where they normally took their lessons. Instead, the girl led her to a little maze-area and pulled her in there.
"This is my favorite place to play 'hide-and-seek'. No one ever finds me here." Ying-fa informed Hilde. The older woman smiled.
"I'll bet."
"It ends at a prettier garden, that grandma planted. Only we know how to get there." Ying-fa informed her happily, as she skipped down the path. Hilde smiled at the little girl's enthusiasm and followed, enjoying the greenery around her.
"Look! There it is!" Ying-fa exclaimed, pulling her into a small, but lovely garden. There were several sakura trees scattered around it, and peonies dotted the ground here and there in clumps. Other flowers mixed with the peonies, and ivy covered the ground in patches. Small benches were placed here and there in the circular area, and a small stream ran through it.
"Oh, it's lovely, Ying-fa!" Hilde gasped. Ying-fa giggled happily.
"Uh-huh!" She murmured, gazing at something out of the corner of her eye. The little girl's smile widened.
"UNCLE KOJII!" She cried, running over to the man standing in the pathway, looking nothing less than shocked. Hilde turned, her heart pounding as her amethyst eyes collided with the all-too familiar amber ones.
"I was showing Ms. Hilde the garden. Isn't she pretty here?" The little girl exclaimed, looking lovingly at her teacher. Hilde's cheeks reddened even more.
"Yes, she is." Kojii answered suddenly, surprising even himself. Hilde's eyes rose and found his, becoming captured in their depths. Ying-fa watched this with a sly little smile, as she crept over to where four little figures hid, trying to stifle their giggles.
"Mission accomplished. Let's go tell grandma." Chang whispered, as the five quickly snuck out of the garden and back home, leaving Kojii and Hilde staring helplessly at each other.
"I'm...I'm sorry. If I had known that you would be here..." Hilde began softly, her body slightly shaking in nervousness, at his presence.
"You would have left, I know." He muttered. Hilde looked at him in astonishment.
"What?" She asked, half-breathlessly. He turned his penetrating gaze back to her.
"You wouldn't have followed Ying-fa. This was a set up, I'm absolutely sure." Kojii commented, nonchalantly. Hilde gasped.
"You mean...Ying-fa brought me here..."
"So we would just 'happen' to run into each other." He stated coldly. Hilde turned horrified eyes back to the building the children had just retreated into.
"Oh! OH!" She gasped, hopelessly unable to do anything more. Her wide amethyst eyes found his and searched desperately for answers.
"Why? Why would they do that?" She breathed. Kojii's voice caught and his heart pounded as her innocent amethyst eyes pleaded with his. It was those same eyes that had caused him to loose his heart all those years ago. He quickly took a steadying breath and shrugged.
"Why do they do most of the things they do? For their own foolish pleasure, I suppose." He stated, loosening up considerably. How could he not, when she was obviously so sweetly confused? His words caused Hilde to laugh slightly.
"Children will be children. And your cousins are five in five-million, so treasure them." She teased. He groaned.
"Speak for yourself, Hiiragizawa." He chuckled. It was then that it struck them both; they were having an actual, civil conversation! This revelation caused them to shoot weak smiles at each other, which in fact, was the first time Kojii had smiled since he had returned to his home all those years ago.
"Well, I had better go in and get my things. Meilei will be wondering where I have gone." Hilde murmured. Kojii nodded, his smile vanishing.
"I shall see you soon, I hope." The last two words were almost illegible, and Hilde failed to hear them.
"Good day, Li-sama." She answered, turning away. His response was to growl softly in annoyance at himself, and watch her retreating form disappear from sight.
~*~*~*~
"Kojii?"
"Meilei, it's late. What's wrong?" Kojii asked as his sister's voice came over the line, surprisingly soft.
"Nothing much. Hilde and Akane are asleep, but Kojii, something happened at the manor today, didn't it?" Meilei asked. Kojii stiffened at her words.
"How did you know?"
"Hilde came in tonight, looking really...far away. She hardly talked at all (not that that is strange), but then she went right to her bedroom after dinner, and didn't come out at all." Meilei explained. Kojii sighed.
"Ying-fa lured her into the gardens when she knew I would be there. I was lucky enough to have a small chat with her." This last sentence was said in a sarcastic tone, but there was an edge of bitterness to it.
"And..."
"It was just civil conversation, Mei. Nothing more." He murmured. Meilei quickly walked out onto the porch of their dorm, and shut the door tightly behind her, before beginning her rant.
"Kojii Li, you just stop this foolishness right now! I know that you love her! I've known it since she left Japan and I found that smashed lamp in your trash-basket!"
"Shut up, Meilei." He hissed, his voice hard and cold. Meilei growled, something that was very un-like her.
"NO! This has to stop, Kojii! You can't keep torturing yourself over this. You LOVE her, Kojii, and the more you try to deny it, the more it's going to eat at you, just like it's done the past five years. And just like it will if you marry that Roderick creature! So do yourself a favor and let it go! See where things take you once you let go. I bet you anything, by next year, Hilde will be yours." Meilei assured him. Kojii's heart pounded at this revelation, and he sank onto his bed, burying his head in a pillow.
"How do you know?" He asked weakly. Mei smiled tenderly.
"Because. If Hilde cared enough to get sick after she found out what she was putting you through, she cares enough to love you." Meilei sighed. Kojii frowned and turned over so he was staring at his ceiling.
"Excuse me?!"
"After Hilde went back to Japan, I called her to give her an update on what you were doing. I told her about how you destroyed your pillows and lamp, and even resorted to beating up the school building. Right after I told her that, the phone was dropped and then picked up by her best friend, Akane. Akane informed me that Hilde had just exited stage-right, to the bathroom, where she was presently getting sick. Apparently, the guilt of what she had done to you was too much for her stomach to handle." Meilei said gently. Now it was Kojii's turn to have waves of guilt waft over him.
"What am I going to do?" He moaned, slapping a hand to his forehead.
"First, you break off your engagement, and for once, tell the elders *why* you're doing it. Second, according to grandma, the sexual tension between you and Hilde is thick enough to cut with a knife. I suggest you just tell her what you're feeling and get it over with." Meilei laughed. Kojii blushed.
"Meilei! I am *not* like that!"
"Fine. Forget talking. Kiss her, for Kami-sama's sake!" Meilei exclaimed. Kojii blushed bright red and Meilei could tell that he was from clear on the other end of the wire. She laughed again.
"Good luck, brother dear! Nighty-night! Have sweet dreams!" Meilei giggled impishly, before hanging up the phone quickly.
Kojii stared at his phone in shock, trying to register what had just happened. One thing was for sure. The old Kojii was returning, little-by- little, and he was determined to get his love back where she belonged...
...In his arms.
~*~*~*~
Thank you for all the reviews, and thank you for your patience. My computer monitor broke, and we had to get a new one, so I haven't been able to get on for the past two days! Bummer, huh?
Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please continue to review!!!
~*~*~*~
JUST BREATHE
by: Daphne Li
Chapter 10.
~*~*~*~
"Miss Hilde?"
It had been almost a month since the scene in the garden, but none of the children had forgotten it. This particular day, the rain had kept them from going outside, so they were stuck in the school room. They had been allowed half an hour of quiet time, to do as they liked, and the children had begun to think back to that day in the garden.
"Yes, Deluce?"
"Why did you call Uncle Kojii by his real name? That time, in the garden?" She asked softly. Hilde caught her breath and bit her lip, an action which was not missed by the sharp eyed Chang, who raised an eyebrow.
"I was upset. I shouldn't have done it." Hilde murmured. Xiaolong frowned.
"But how did you know his name?" He asked. Hilde sighed.
"I'm sure that you know about my sister going to school with him when they were younger...don't you?" At her words, the children shook their heads. Hilde sighed again.
"Well...she did. And they weren't very friendly towards each other."
"They didn't like each other?" Ying-fa asked.
"They *hated* each other. But one day, my sister asked me to switch places with her. I did, and I met Kojii...Li-sama, there." Hilde explained. Deluce had now slid to her side, and placed her hand into Hilde's. Ying-fa had taken to resting her head on Hilde's lap, while Chang sat on the desk across from them. Xiaolong sat on the floor next to Ying-fa, with Akito close by his side.
"What was Uncle Kojii like, back then?" Xiaolong asked. Hilde smiled, remembering.
"At first he was a perfect horror, always trying to get under my skin and make fun of me. Then, I became sick, and was forced to stay at his house. It was at that time when I realized that he was actually quite nice, just a little mischievous. When Meilei and I became good friends, he started warming up to me...but remember, this was when I was acting as my sister. Meilei had figured out our secret, but Kojii...he hadn't." Hilde went on. The children's smiles faded.
"I knew that if my sister came back, she would hurt him by telling him that she had never liked him. So, I decided to tell him I had 'changed' as a deal with a friend, and I pushed him away. According to Meilei, he was never the same after that. I suppose...I suppose that I am the one who made him the way he is now." Hilde murmured, her tears near the surface.
Poor little Ying-fa began crying softly, and the boys were looking stunned by the end. Deluce buried her head into Hilde's shoulder and hugged her tightly.
"It wasn't your fault. It wasn't." The girl's voice was muffled.
"'Lucy is right. It was not your fault." Xiaolong stated, using Deluce's nickname. The two younger children nodded sharply, and Chang simply frowned, obviously agreeing with them.
"Poor Uncle Kojii. Poor you, Ms. Hilde." Ying-fa whimpered, hugging her teacher's knees. Hilde smiled at the children's support, and her smile made them all feel better.
"Thank you. But you know...I think your school time is just about over!" Her words raised a happy cheer from the children, and they quickly went to put their things away, completely forgetting their sorrow.
None of them noticed a pair of amber eyes watching them through the slightly-open classroom door.
~*~*~*~
"Shy-by!" Came a cry from over the line. Hilde had just called her sister, and obviously, Heidi was more than willing to talk.
"Hello to you, too, Dee." Hilde laughed, using her sister's nickname.
"How are you doing? How is Meilei? Are you having fun teaching?" Heidi shot questions as soon as she thought of them. Hilde laughed.
"I am fine. She's doing well. Yes, lots of fun." She answered jokingly. Heidi let out a laugh.
"So, who are your latest students?" She asked. Hilde paused.
"Um...I'm tutoring a group of cousins." She admitted hesitantly. Heidi made an exasperated sound.
"Yes, but who are they?"
"Meilei's young cousins. There are five of them, and they all live at the Li family home..."
"WAIT! Back up, Shy-by! You mean to tell me, that you are working in a place that you can see Kojii Li every day?" Her sister asked, shocked. Hilde winced.
"I've only seen him once...and that was with his *fiancee* and her father." Hilde explained. Heidi snorted.
"Fiancee? Who would want to marry him?"
"It's an arranged marriage. Her name is Shayla Roderick. Her father, Robert Roderick, used to know mother." Hilde explained. Heidi gave a gasp.
"Hilde! Do you know who he is?" She choked out. Hilde frowned.
"No. I know that he was mother's friend..."
"He was never her friend! He was that man who was so obsessed with her, he tried to rape mother!" Heidi shouted. Hilde gasped and collapsed into a chair.
"What?!" She managed.
"It's true. Hilde, you'd better watch out. He might just come after you, he was so obsessed with mum." Heidi advised. Hilde groaned.
"Dee, he's obviously married, and he has a daughter..."
"Who is probably as crummy as he is..."
"HEIDI! Be serious, please! I wonder if we should tell the Li's this."
"Heck no! Hilde, if we did, what evidence could we give them to prove anything. Just lay low for right now. Try to find out her mother's name. Perhaps that would help." Heidi suggested. Hilde wrinkled her nose.
"You are too much, sister-dear."
"I know. I know."
~*~*~*~
"Miss Hilde, grandma said she wanted to talk with you after school." Akito stated, as he and his cousins settled into their seats in the pavilion. Hilde looked up, alarmed.
"Oh?"
"Yes. She wants to meet you." Deluce added, her eyes sparkling. Obviously she knew something that the other's did not.
"All right." Hilde murmured, getting out her teaching book. Ying-fa and Akito had their lessons first, today, while the others worked on their spelling. While Hilde was busy with the two twins, she failed to notice Deluce sneaking away, nor the girl's timely return, just before Hilde turned her attention back to the older three.
Finally, lessons were through, but for once, the children stayed and helped to clean up. Then they led their teacher back into the house.
"Grandma's waiting for you in the tea-room. I'll show you." Deluce offered, taking Hilde's hand and leading her down a long hall that Hilde had never been in, as the other children turned down another hallway, looking over their shoulders as they went. Deluce and Hilde stopped as they came to a big set of oak-wood doors, and Deluce opened one.
"She's here, grandma." The girl called. There was a slight laugh from inside.
"Well, let her in, child. Don't keep her standing out there." Came a soft, strong voice. Deluce grinned at these words and quickly pulled her teacher into the room.
"Here she is! She looks just like the picture you showed me of her mother, grandma!" The girl exclaimed. Hilde looked confused, and then she turned her eyes to the woman in the room.
Yelan Li was sitting in a straight-backed chair, her long black hair pulled up into its elegant knot and her hands folded calmly in her lap. Her face was serene, but it held a hint of a steely air in it.
"Come in, dear. Don't be shy." Yelan murmured, motioning to the chair next to her. Hilde smiled and sat down, Deluce quickly taking a seat on the floor by her feet. Yelan looked at the young woman carefully, and then smiled.
"You look just like your mother, Hilde. Is she still in the fashion industry?" Yelan asked, pouring two cups of tea and handing one to her. Hilde nodded.
"She is. She loves it too much to simply leave." Hilde laughed. Yelan smiled.
"You know, all of my grandchildren speak highly of you...especially Meilei." Yelan chuckled at this, and Deluce shot her a small glare.
"I speak higher, grandma!" She pouted. Hilde laughed and stroked the girl's hair.
"Yes, I'm sure you do. But the only person in my whole family who does not seem to speak about you much, is my grandson, Kojii." Yelan murmured, watching Hilde closely. The girl's face turned pale, and she bit her lip sharply, causing Yelan to wince slightly as she caught sight of it.
"Oh?" Hilde asked, weakly. Yelan nodded, slowly pulling the girl into the trap she had laid. No, this wasn't a bad sort of trap...it was more of a information-grabbing trap.
"Yes. Yet, although he doesn't *speak* of you, he seems to know more about you than any of them. Just the other day, in fact, the children were trying to figure out what you smelled like, and he informed them that you smelled of 'vanilla and lavender'. And I must say. He was right." Yelan laughed, taking a delicate sniff at the girl. Hilde flushed bright red.
"I do not know how he could know." She murmured. Yelan raised an eyebrow.
"Oh, you don't? Deluce, will you go and ask the cook what we are having for supper?"
"But grandma..."
"Now, Deluce." Yelan commanded. The little girl frowned and stomped from the room, her brown hair swinging as she went. Yelan then turned to Hilde.
"You were a lot closer to Kojii than either of you have admitted, weren't you?" She asked in a clipped voice. Hilde winced.
"He was...a friend." She murmured.
"But you felt that you were cheating him, because he didn't know you weren't your sister." Yelan filled in for her. Hilde nodded. Yelan sighed.
"Hilde, you were closer than friends, weren't you? Tell me the truth. What did you feel for him?" Yelan asked, her voice slightly warmer. Hilde swallowed hard and tears neared the surface.
"I...I don't now. I thought we were friends...but then he...and I..." Hilde trailed off, unable to continue. She hung her head and stared at her lap.
"What happened, Hilde?"
"The last day I was in Japan. I had to tell him that the truce was off...he wasn't pleased...but then he kissed me..." At this, Hilde blushed and Yelan looked at her in astonishment. Then Hilde went on.
"He told me that if I was going to 'push him down', that he was going to take me down with him." Hilde murmured, one single tear running down her cheek.
"And he did, didn't he?" Yelan asked. Hilde frowned.
"In what respect?"
"You are still in love with him. And he with you."
"He never loved me." Hilde murmured. Yelan chuckled.
"Child, I think he does. Remember how he used to be? Now look at him now. Don't tell me that 'nothing' made that change. It was you. And you alone can fix it." Yelan stated. Hilde was about to protest when the doors opened again. The two women turned and Hilde caught her breath hard.
There, in the doorway, stood Kojii Li. His face was stony, and his body was rigid.
"Supper is ready, grandmother." He announced, his eyes straying over to Hilde. Yelan noticed this and smiled.
"I will be down in a moment, Kojii. I am just finishing my talk with Hilde." Yelan stated, her eyes twinkling. The young man nodded and turned to go.
"No, you stay here, Kojii. Hilde, it was very nice speaking with you, and I will call you soon, so we can chat more." Yelan murmured, hugging Hilde and placing a kiss on her forehead. Hilde nodded and quickly walked away, not once glancing at the young man in the doorway.
"She is a wonderful girl, isn't she?" Yelan asked. Kojii stiffened even more.
"I wouldn't know."
"Don't even try to deny it, Kojii. I am not blind and I see what has happened. But let me tell you this. She has suffered as much, if not more than you have over this, and it will not do to keep denying it. She tried to as well, but the truth always comes out when I am questioning, my grandson. Remember that." Yelan stated, leaving the room. Kojii stood still, looking at the place where Hilde had once sat.
His eyes were now filled with pain, as he started to walk over towards the chair she had been seated in; pain and many more emotions that he would never allow any other person to see.
"Why? Why did you have to come back and make my life a hell again? Why, Hilde?" He groaned, sinking into the chair and stuffing his face into its cushions.
The faint smell of vanilla and lavender still lingered there.
~*~*~*~
"Ms. Hilde! Ms. Hilde!"
Hilde looked up from the tests she was correcting, and smiled at the tiny Ying-fa. The children had had a half-day of lessons today, and she had stayed to correct the tests they had taken that day.
"What is it, darling?"
"Will you take a walk with me?" The little girl asked eagerly, her black curls bouncing as she shifted eagerly from one foot to the other. Hilde smiled.
"Wait a moment and let me finish correcting Xiaolong's test." She murmured, quickly finishing the grading. Then she placed the test into its proper place and got up.
"Where are we going?" She asked. Ying-fa smiled.
"The gardens. Mommy said I could take you there." She squealed excitedly. Hilde laughed and followed the little girl willingly. Ying-fa led her out into the gardens and past the pavilion where they normally took their lessons. Instead, the girl led her to a little maze-area and pulled her in there.
"This is my favorite place to play 'hide-and-seek'. No one ever finds me here." Ying-fa informed Hilde. The older woman smiled.
"I'll bet."
"It ends at a prettier garden, that grandma planted. Only we know how to get there." Ying-fa informed her happily, as she skipped down the path. Hilde smiled at the little girl's enthusiasm and followed, enjoying the greenery around her.
"Look! There it is!" Ying-fa exclaimed, pulling her into a small, but lovely garden. There were several sakura trees scattered around it, and peonies dotted the ground here and there in clumps. Other flowers mixed with the peonies, and ivy covered the ground in patches. Small benches were placed here and there in the circular area, and a small stream ran through it.
"Oh, it's lovely, Ying-fa!" Hilde gasped. Ying-fa giggled happily.
"Uh-huh!" She murmured, gazing at something out of the corner of her eye. The little girl's smile widened.
"UNCLE KOJII!" She cried, running over to the man standing in the pathway, looking nothing less than shocked. Hilde turned, her heart pounding as her amethyst eyes collided with the all-too familiar amber ones.
"I was showing Ms. Hilde the garden. Isn't she pretty here?" The little girl exclaimed, looking lovingly at her teacher. Hilde's cheeks reddened even more.
"Yes, she is." Kojii answered suddenly, surprising even himself. Hilde's eyes rose and found his, becoming captured in their depths. Ying-fa watched this with a sly little smile, as she crept over to where four little figures hid, trying to stifle their giggles.
"Mission accomplished. Let's go tell grandma." Chang whispered, as the five quickly snuck out of the garden and back home, leaving Kojii and Hilde staring helplessly at each other.
"I'm...I'm sorry. If I had known that you would be here..." Hilde began softly, her body slightly shaking in nervousness, at his presence.
"You would have left, I know." He muttered. Hilde looked at him in astonishment.
"What?" She asked, half-breathlessly. He turned his penetrating gaze back to her.
"You wouldn't have followed Ying-fa. This was a set up, I'm absolutely sure." Kojii commented, nonchalantly. Hilde gasped.
"You mean...Ying-fa brought me here..."
"So we would just 'happen' to run into each other." He stated coldly. Hilde turned horrified eyes back to the building the children had just retreated into.
"Oh! OH!" She gasped, hopelessly unable to do anything more. Her wide amethyst eyes found his and searched desperately for answers.
"Why? Why would they do that?" She breathed. Kojii's voice caught and his heart pounded as her innocent amethyst eyes pleaded with his. It was those same eyes that had caused him to loose his heart all those years ago. He quickly took a steadying breath and shrugged.
"Why do they do most of the things they do? For their own foolish pleasure, I suppose." He stated, loosening up considerably. How could he not, when she was obviously so sweetly confused? His words caused Hilde to laugh slightly.
"Children will be children. And your cousins are five in five-million, so treasure them." She teased. He groaned.
"Speak for yourself, Hiiragizawa." He chuckled. It was then that it struck them both; they were having an actual, civil conversation! This revelation caused them to shoot weak smiles at each other, which in fact, was the first time Kojii had smiled since he had returned to his home all those years ago.
"Well, I had better go in and get my things. Meilei will be wondering where I have gone." Hilde murmured. Kojii nodded, his smile vanishing.
"I shall see you soon, I hope." The last two words were almost illegible, and Hilde failed to hear them.
"Good day, Li-sama." She answered, turning away. His response was to growl softly in annoyance at himself, and watch her retreating form disappear from sight.
~*~*~*~
"Kojii?"
"Meilei, it's late. What's wrong?" Kojii asked as his sister's voice came over the line, surprisingly soft.
"Nothing much. Hilde and Akane are asleep, but Kojii, something happened at the manor today, didn't it?" Meilei asked. Kojii stiffened at her words.
"How did you know?"
"Hilde came in tonight, looking really...far away. She hardly talked at all (not that that is strange), but then she went right to her bedroom after dinner, and didn't come out at all." Meilei explained. Kojii sighed.
"Ying-fa lured her into the gardens when she knew I would be there. I was lucky enough to have a small chat with her." This last sentence was said in a sarcastic tone, but there was an edge of bitterness to it.
"And..."
"It was just civil conversation, Mei. Nothing more." He murmured. Meilei quickly walked out onto the porch of their dorm, and shut the door tightly behind her, before beginning her rant.
"Kojii Li, you just stop this foolishness right now! I know that you love her! I've known it since she left Japan and I found that smashed lamp in your trash-basket!"
"Shut up, Meilei." He hissed, his voice hard and cold. Meilei growled, something that was very un-like her.
"NO! This has to stop, Kojii! You can't keep torturing yourself over this. You LOVE her, Kojii, and the more you try to deny it, the more it's going to eat at you, just like it's done the past five years. And just like it will if you marry that Roderick creature! So do yourself a favor and let it go! See where things take you once you let go. I bet you anything, by next year, Hilde will be yours." Meilei assured him. Kojii's heart pounded at this revelation, and he sank onto his bed, burying his head in a pillow.
"How do you know?" He asked weakly. Mei smiled tenderly.
"Because. If Hilde cared enough to get sick after she found out what she was putting you through, she cares enough to love you." Meilei sighed. Kojii frowned and turned over so he was staring at his ceiling.
"Excuse me?!"
"After Hilde went back to Japan, I called her to give her an update on what you were doing. I told her about how you destroyed your pillows and lamp, and even resorted to beating up the school building. Right after I told her that, the phone was dropped and then picked up by her best friend, Akane. Akane informed me that Hilde had just exited stage-right, to the bathroom, where she was presently getting sick. Apparently, the guilt of what she had done to you was too much for her stomach to handle." Meilei said gently. Now it was Kojii's turn to have waves of guilt waft over him.
"What am I going to do?" He moaned, slapping a hand to his forehead.
"First, you break off your engagement, and for once, tell the elders *why* you're doing it. Second, according to grandma, the sexual tension between you and Hilde is thick enough to cut with a knife. I suggest you just tell her what you're feeling and get it over with." Meilei laughed. Kojii blushed.
"Meilei! I am *not* like that!"
"Fine. Forget talking. Kiss her, for Kami-sama's sake!" Meilei exclaimed. Kojii blushed bright red and Meilei could tell that he was from clear on the other end of the wire. She laughed again.
"Good luck, brother dear! Nighty-night! Have sweet dreams!" Meilei giggled impishly, before hanging up the phone quickly.
Kojii stared at his phone in shock, trying to register what had just happened. One thing was for sure. The old Kojii was returning, little-by- little, and he was determined to get his love back where she belonged...
...In his arms.
~*~*~*~