Wow, I got a lot  reviews for this story. Didn't expect people to like it so much. But then again, all SetoxShizuka stories I have read are good ones, so I guess its little wonder why people like it so much. I'm at a hotel right now with my dad and my little brother. We just got back from swimming in the indoor pool. This was the first time I've been swimming since May. I know, I have not gone swimming all summer. Pretty bad, huh? Dad's watching football right now. UGH! Hockey 'tis be much better. HOCKEY!!! XD

So how was everyone's Christmas?? Mine was great. I am probably one of the few 18-year-old girls out there who receive Yu-Gi-Oh! stuff for Christmas from her family. I got a Gameboy SP, The Scared Cards, and the Dungeon Dice Monsters DVD. Dubbed, granted, but Otogi's a hottie so I'm not complaining. XD The Sacred Cards is an awesome game! It's more than just dueling, but an actual RPG game! All the characters are chibis and they look so adorable! Especially Kaiba! He's a big head, and big hair, and an itty-bitty body. They look like little virtual plushies! XD The only problem I have with that game is that you have to play the part of a boy and people call you "punk", "boy", "bro", and "dude". XP Sexist pigs. Why can't they have a "Choose Your Gender" option? ^_~*

Saw The Return of the King last night. OMG, I cried like a freakin' baby. I was bawling in the seat. We had second-row seats and it was the most intense movie I ever saw. I am torn between The Fellowship of the Ring and The Return of the King. The Two Towers was a bit boring in my opinion. The Fellowship was so funny and lighthearted and The Return was so intense and moving. Gah! I'm torn!

Okay, I'm going to shut up now so you all can read.

Disclaimer: If I owned Yu-Gi-Oh! there would be a lot more Kaiba butt-shots, Kaiba shirtless, and chibi Kaiba! XD

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Chapter Two

Abandoned

~*~

Damn it all! How did Malik use this thing!?

As if it would help, Kaiba gripped the dull golden Item in his hands and shook it with all he was worth. Stupid piece of ancient junk! What, was he not good enough for it or something? Didn't those nutcases tell him that he was once the holder of the Shennen Rod? So why won't it work?!

Seeing since shaking was not helping matters any, Kaiba stood there on his balcony growling at it, eyes ripping it to shreds with their infamous oceanic death glare. Though he wasn't doing it for any specific reason other than he always growled and glared when he was trying to figure something out, it looked as though he was trying to intimidate the Rod into working properly. It could be maybe that his reasons for using it had something to do with how the Rod worked. Maybe his thoughts were too malicious, too selfish that it decided not to activate.

Okay, that was about the lamest thought he could ever have! First of all, the Shennen Rod, magical or not, was an inanimate object, incapable of thinking on its own! Second, Malik used the Shennen Item to kill people, torture minds, and basically destroy the world. Kaiba, for once, wasn't after power. He didn't want to take over the world, considering he had no idea what to do with it if he did, and he didn't want to kill anyone…except maybe Joey, but he'll do that his own way. He just wanted his girlfriend back, damn it!

Well if truth be told, Serenity was not his girlfriend and she was actually married to someone else…but those were minor technicalities.

As he glared at the Rod, he got a faint sensation within him that somehow the Rod was laughing at him. Of course, the situation was rather funny. Here he was the original holder of the Shennen Rod and he had not a clue how to use it, whereas this other guy who had stolen the Rod went prancing around with the expertise of a professional! Why was it Seto Kaiba always managed to fall victim to these humiliating ironies? Like how an uneducated idiot like Joey Wheeler, who, despite his lack of brain-cells, could cook a mean meal, and he, Seto Kaiba the genius, superior to almost all with his skills and intelligence, couldn't so much as make a bowl of soup without burning either it or himself or both.

It just wasn't fair! And how does one manage to burn a bowl of soup? Very carefully, he guessed.

Sighing with disgust, Kaiba shot the Rod one last glare before going back into his bedroom. Even a sunny day such as this one did not cheer him up, and he usually liked standing out in his balcony looking out towards the mountains, away from the chaos and hustle-bustle of the city. Maybe he'll spend a few days at the beach house. If anything, he loved the sea, the calming effect it had on him. Looking out at a cerulean being under the red and gold and purple of dusk, its shifting tides like horses running to the shore with white manes flowing endlessly was something that always captivated him, sweeping him to places he always wanted to be; away from here, away from these unfeeling shells people had the nerve to call humans.

He fell on his back upon the bed, staring up at the ceiling, long fingers curling and uncurling around the Rod at his side.

He knew he wasn't human. No way could a soul as black as his could be anything remotely close to human. But, looking around at his fellow beings, if being human meant hurting those around you, thinking only of yourself, using others endlessly to get what you want, then yeah, maybe he was human. As he mused, he thought of Yugi and his groupies. Yeah, they'll get theirs one day. Things like love and friendship, those were only temporary. No matter how many friends you have and how much you love, eventually you will be abandoned. There was no way around it.

A familiar ache began to stir within Kaiba and he rolled over onto his side. He fingered the Shennen Rod gently, eyes fading out of focus.

Yes, everyone Seto had ever loved had abandoned him in one form or another. His parents had abandoned him through death. His stepfather, Gozaburo, had abandoned him by abuse after heart-wrenching abuse. His brother…Mokuba was growing older, he had no need for his big brother anymore. Instead of singing Seto's praises, now all the 18-year-old could do was talk about his girlfriend, Rebecca. Seto could tell Mokuba was extremely happy with Rebecca and madly in love with her. What use could he have for Seto now that he had found someone else to make him happy?

And Serenity. He could remember those words vividly as if she were right here, lying beside him, whispering them into his ear as her lips brushed against the sensitive flesh:

"Please, don't tell."

Not that Seto was going to waltz around Battle Ship, announcing he had slept with Serenity, but eventually, if there was to be a relationship, he wanted to let others know. Of course he didn't care what anyone else thought, but the way she had said those words sounded like she had been ashamed of him, of being with him. That he was not good enough for her, not worth the dirt under her shoes. So, in revenge he had abandoned her, pretending he had never slept with her, just to make her see what it felt like being alone and abandoned.

He was on his stomach now, gritting his teeth, as the ache grew stronger in his heart. This always happened, whenever he was completely alone. This was what went on with Seto Kaiba behind the scenes, when loneliness hit him the most. Bottled up feelings he had never revealed to anyone, not even his own brother, claimed his dying heart and seemed to rip it to shreds.

The Rod under his fingers began to glow ever so slightly.

Restless, he flipped back on his back as a new memory invaded his brain. He was a child again, a mere thirteen years, and he and his stepfather were going at it again. It was the one and only time Seto could remember that he had ever revealed his feelings to someone. And the results had been devastating.

"If you have no desire to run Kaiba Corp. in my stead, then why did you challenge me to that chess game?"

"I just wanted my brother and I out of that hell-hole! And I was going to do it by any means necessary!"

"That's a lie! I can see it in your eyes. You're allowing your emotions to show again, Seto. That is not good if you want to make it anywhere in the world. Now tell me the truth. You claim you don't want to run Kaiba Corp. and yet you are stealing it from me right from under my nose!"

Thrash!

"You screamed, Seto. Didn't I tell you that you need to subjugate your pain?"

Thrash!

"That's better. However, I am not going to stop until you are absolutely silent. Now tell me the truth! Why did you challenge me to that game of chess?!"

"The media…the media gave you an image of being someone who could love us, take care of us. That's what I wanted. If not for me, I wanted Mokuba to have a happy childhood." A gasp for air as the pain burned through his back, the blood oozing out of the slices of flesh onto the pure white sheets. "I thought…I thought you could love us. That's all I wanted. I just wanted to be loved. Why does this have to be this way!? Why can't you just love me!?! Why can't you be my father!?"

Thrash! Another scream, louder than the others.

"Love? You foolish boy! Love does not exist! It is merely a temporary emotion to give to others in exchange for what you want. Once you give someone what they want, they stop loving you and move on to prey on others, leaving you cold and alone. The media may have painted illusions on me to fool worthless maggots like you, but I am no illusion here nor am I about you give you any. Love. HA! You make me sick, Seto. You always have. Your sensitivity is a huge weakness on this company. Like right now. You're crying. You're trying to hold back your tears, but yet they are falling uncontrollably. You're weak, and therefore that makes you worthless! You are worthless to me and you will be worthless to everyone else!"

Thrash! Thrash! Thrash!

"Before I send you back to the streets where worthless shit like you belong, I am going to send you as a warning to the other trash just exactly what love is!"

Seto's eyes shot open as he snapped in a sit-up position. Sweat beads trickled down his wet shirt, and he closed his eyes to the burning pain on his back. It had been ten years. The scars had never healed. And they always seemed to burn whenever he thought about the incident. But an incident as traumatic as that is something that time does not so easily fade.

He ran his fingers through his moisture-drenched bangs. Barely three years had passed since the incident before he fell for another illusion. Yes, he had been drawn to Serenity's innocence and integrity. Unlike her clueless brother, rarely had she spoken unless she had something worth saying. She was quiet, but out of shyness and respect, not because she was a recluse like himself. At first he had been suspicious of her quietness, but given that she had done nothing to confirm his suspicions, he placed them aside. And after kissing her thanks to Malik's dare, he knew he had to have her.

The Rod glowed brighter but Seto took no notice.

"Please don't tell."

An illusion. Serenity had been nothing more than an illusion. Just like Gozaburo. Serenity was ashamed of being with Seto, proving what a malicious little vixen she really was. Well, he was not going to be abandoned! Not this time!

Kaiba looked down in his hands. The Rod was vibrant now, its eerie ancient glow illuminating the bedroom in gold. His bangs parted as a golden eye seemed to appear on his forehead. Oh, yes, she was going to pay. One way or another, Serenity was going to pay.

~*~

"Oh, come on, Yugi, it's not like I'm going to go nuts with it like that psychopath, I just want to know how they work."

The unexpected visit from Seto Kaiba, not to mention the even more unexpected interest he had in the Shennen Items, was a bit scary in Yugi's eyes. Yami, watching from the mind-link, narrowed his crimson eyes. He knew that look all too well. His cousin's azure orbs carried that same glint 3,000 years ago. Yup, Kaiba was up to something.

::Yugi, I don't think we should tell him about how to activate the Shennen Items. I don't like that look in his eyes. He's up to no good, Yugi.::

::Yami, no offense, but you need to learn how to trust people more.::

::And you need to learn how to listen to people more.::

"Well, seeing since I am the original holder of the Shennen Rod," Seto reasoned, "don't you think it should be fair that I know how to use it?" He leaned his elbows against the counter, staring intently at the smaller boy. Granted, at 21, Yugi had indeed grown some. At least he was as tall as Tea now, but that included the hair. Secretly, Kaiba began to wonder it that hair was natural. No way could someone be spending 100 bucks a year solely on hair dye.

"Well, it really isn't that complicated, Kaiba," Yugi finally replied.

Kaiba's eyes narrowed, but his ability to control his emotions kept him from losing his temper. What, don't think I have the capability to figure out my own Shennen Item!? We'll see about that, Yugi!

::Yugi,:: Yami pleaded, ::this is not a good idea.::

::What can Kaiba do with the Rod? It's not like he wants the world.::

::But I know my cousin! Trust me, Yugi, Kaiba is up to no good.::

::Yami…I think you're making a big deal out of this. If Kaiba is your family, why don't you let him get what he deserves?::

::What he deserves is a good kick in the pants,:: Yami grumbled. ::And I'm not talking about his butt, either.::

::YAMI!::

Deciding to put Yami on ignore, Yugi turned back to Kaiba. "Okay, Kaiba, I'll tell you. It's hard to think of at first, but once you figure it out its really simple. When I first owned the Shennen Puzzle, I had no idea it possessed powers."

Oh, great, story time, Kaiba groaned mentally.

"But then weird things started happening to me," Yugi continued. "It seemed as if the Puzzle was activating by itself. But when I sat back and thought about it, I realized that it was not the Puzzle but myself who was activating its powers. The Puzzle senses when I am extremely passionate about something and it reacts to it, whether it be good or bad."

"So you're saying that it reacts to strong emotions?"

"Kinda. If you want to accomplish something with your Shennen Item, you have to be extremely passionate about it. You have to pour your entire heart into your goal."

Kaiba nodded. Certainly explained why the Rod didn't work at first, and suddenly blazed without warning when he was traveling down memory lane. The Rod must have reacted to his inner suffering. Well, this didn't sound too hard. He only had to exert his emotions to make the Rod do his bidding.

::This is a mistake,:: Yami groaned. Sure, Yugi could be right, and Kaiba only wanted the facts to sedate his curiosity, but the Pharaoh still couldn't shake away the heavy feeling of dread creeping up his stomach.  

~*~

After telling Mokuba almost the whole story, except the part about that wild night with his brother, Serenity managed to give him a condensed version of the story, how she and Kaiba had a secret relationship going on, she ended up giving him more than what she could handle, and broke up with him.

"Did you sleep with him?" came the next question.

Instantly, Serenity shook her head. That was a secret she did not want to share with anyone. Seven years she had held it, and she was not going to let it go now. She was ashamed of her actions, her weakness, how she had given in to him without so much as a fight.

Just like a bitch in heat.

They have been cruising around town in Mokuba's black Viper for about thirty minutes now, and looking at her from the corner of his ever-observant blood-violet eyes, Mokuba understood that there was far more to this story than Serenity was letting on. There was pain behind those amber orbs, but he wasn't going to press her for details. He could ask Seto what happened, but he doubted his brother would say a word about the matter. More than likely, he'll probably pretend it…whatever "it" was…didn't even exist.

"Hey, Serenity," he spoke up after five minutes of musing silence.

"Yes?"

Pulling to a stop by the cause of a red light, Mokuba smiled at her. "Why don't you take the rest of the day off? You look really tired, and besides, I can handle things fine back at work."

"Mokuba, I'll be fine," Serenity began to protest, but Mokuba was shaking his head.

"I insist. My brother's entrance no doubt shook you up pretty bad. And I have to leave early because I have a date with Rebecca tonight." She couldn't help but grin at the tiny adorable blush that appeared across his nose. Yup, he was going to be gone for a while.

Finally, she nodded her consent, and five minutes later, Mokuba dropped her off at her apartment complex. "Thanks, Mokuba, I think I can take it from here," she declared.

"You sure, now?"

"Positive."

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow at 9:00 sharp."

She could not resist a grin coming to her face. "Yes, sir." He waved to her as he drove off, and she waved back. It was little wonder why Rebecca loved him so much. Through all the years Serenity had known him, Mokuba had grown up to be a fine young gentleman. So much unlike his older, malicious brother.

Silently she dusted off the invisible wrinkles in her skirt. She must learn to direct her thoughts away from that road. Here or not, Seto—Kaiba—meant nothing to her anymore. She was married to Malik; Kaiba nothing more than a vague memory, a dead leaf blowing away in a cold, autumn wind. She had to learn to treat him as such.

~*~

"Hey, sleepy-head, wake up."

Serenity turned in her sleep onto her back, staring up into adoring amethyst eyes. "Usually, I'm the one who comes home first and you come just in time for dinner," Malik announced. "But now you're home before I am. What gives?"

"Mokuba gave me the rest of the day off," she explained. "I sort of had a run-in with Seto Kaiba this afternoon."

"Really? He's back? What happened? Why did you two have a run-in?" He sat at the edge of the bed, waiting patiently for her explanation.

She sighed as she stared up at the ceiling. "We just had an argument. Apparently, he expected something more from the kiss he and I had on Battle Ship."

Malik's brows rose. "But that was seven years ago!"

"He's pretty persistent." She wanted to shoot herself. She couldn't believe she had told such a lie to Malik. It had been completely visa versa. She had wanted the relationship, and Kaiba had been the one who ignored her.

"He realizes you are married to me now, right?"

"Of course. He didn't come to the wedding, but I set him straight. He seemed pretty ticked, but he dropped it. I don't think he's going to be bothering me anymore."

Malik smiled with relief. "Good." As he rose to go to the bathroom, Serenity released the breath she had been holding. Why couldn't she just tell him the truth? It was seven years ago, before she and Malik hooked up, why shouldn't he understand? Malik, Kaiba and I slept together seven years ago, and now Kaiba has come back to make something more of it. I told him 'no' and he got pissed off and he left. There. That sounded simple enough. So why couldn't she do it?

Suddenly, a brush of fingers flitted across her cheek. She gasped silently, looking around but seeing no one there. The fingers quickly returned, caressing her neck and lowering to run over her hardened nipples. But there was no one there! No, this isn't happening.

Lips pressed themselves ever so softly and tenderly against hers as the invisible hands ran themselves all over her body, despite her layers of clothing. The tender kiss moved to her ear as if an unseen someone was gently trying to make love to her. She squirmed, shivering with ecstasy.

A memory flashed in her mind, a seven-year-old memory that played over and over in her mind over the years, but now she could see it as if it were happening right in front of her. She could see Seto's beautiful ivory body in its splendid form as he made love to her with tenderness and passion she had no idea a person could possess. Then she could hear his voice, whispering softly in her ear. ::Remember, Serenity. You can't forget me. You can never forget me. I won't allow you to just abandon me.::

Then it was all gone. Everything. The image. The invisible fingers. The tender kiss. Gone, gone, gone.

The bathroom door opened and Malik stood against the doorway, looking at her hungrily. "Have I ever told you that I am so lucky to have the most beautiful wife in the world?" he whispered. She bit her lower lip, forcing herself to smiling as he crawled onto the bed next to her. He took her hand in his, interlocking their fingers together. "Soon you and I will be able to start a family, I'm sure," he whispered. "Three boys and two girls. How 'bout it?"

"Malik," Serenity whispered. She hated this. Her heart ached. Malik was so good to her. Why shouldn't that be enough to forget someone as black-hearted as Kaiba?

A pair of fingers pressed against her lips. "Don't speak," Malik whispered. "It makes me want you too much."

The couple started kissing until she pushed him away enough to talk. "What about dinner, honey?"

"Later," he answered breathlessly. "I am hungry only for you, beloved." He returned to kissing her, and she gave in. Clothes soon found themselves abandoned on the floor. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn't help but imagine it was really Seto making love to her.

~*~

Kaiba sank to the floor, holding his head, gasping for breath as the Rod clanged against the floor. Damn, but using the Shennen Rod could take out a lot on someone. After intense practicing, and finally having made a wild squirrel do a disco-type dance outside for about three minutes before he felt like his head was going to explode, a few hours Kaiba tried for Serenity. He didn't have long. She was across town and he didn't know if he would be able to take the power surge. It had been fun mind touching her even if he couldn't feel anything. At least she felt his touch, and no doubt freaked her out. But given her distance, Seto did not have long to do much, and right before he felt like his temples were going to burst, managed to whisper his warning in her ear:

Remember, Serenity. You can't forget me. You can never forget me. I won't allow you to just abandon me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

No footnotes today.

So, what did you all think? Good? Bad? More? By the way, should I go into more detail about the sexy stuff? I got in trouble once with a Rurouni Kenshin story so I don't know if I should risk it. But if enough people want me to, I will.