Disclaimer: FLCL is not mine nor any characters used, all original characters, places, etc are mine.
Author's Notes: Ok, starting to introduce the plot, most questions should be answered next chapter, I wanted to develop the reunion stuff first, meeting with Kamon and such.
" FOOOLLLYYYY COOOLLLLYYYING!?" Kamon exclaimed, making wild hand gestures as his face spasmodically changed threw just about every emotion imaginable.
" Not again….." Naota sighed, embarrassed by his over-excitable family and their seemingly deliberate efforts to appear completely weird. Not for the first or last time, Naota began to wonder why his father was the only immature adult in Mabase.
" See you Fooly Cooly like this, with your hands, see?" Shigekuni, Naota's grandfather and local baseball team coach, made several random hand gestures on a table, grim faced, as Haruko leaned over his shoulder and watched with mock interested. If one moment in his life need not be repeated, it was this one, Naota thought to himself.
" Mouth to mouth…..WHAT!?…Like this…He is….FOOLY COOLYING?" came the seemingly exact same conversation from the trio as Naota walked upstairs to his room with an exasperated sigh. He should have seen it coming, knowing how excitable his father was and how much Haruko loved to lead on just about anyone.
Naota pulled a cigarette out of a nearly depleted pack in his desk drawer. After grabbing a lighter from the top of his desk, he quickly flicked on the lighter. Putting the cigarette in his mouth and bringing the small flame to the end he took one, deep, drag. He began to see exactly why Mamimi had smoked so often as the acrid taste of the cigarette filled his mouth and lungs. Naota began to take another drag when some loud, mechanical sound seemed to be coming from where he had left the zany trio.
Naota cocked his head slightly, the sound was getting somewhat louder, he quickly cupped his right hand over his ear, his lit cigarette hanging lazily at the edge of his mouth.
Vroom….bum bum bum….vrrroooommmm
The teenager frowned, still unsure of exactly what the sound was. He moved closer to the door, his hand still cupped over his ear, the sound got louder…
Put put put….vrrrooooommm……bum bum…..
Enthralled, Naota edged forward, putting his head up against the door before taking a good drag of his cigarette, blowing some smoke out over his shoulder. Naota's face creased into an even deeper frown as he tried to discern exactly what the sound was as it seemed to drown out the loud conversation that should have been going on.
PUT PUT PUT….VRRROOOOOMMMMM
Naota's eyes grew wide, his mouth went agape, the halfway smoked cigarette dropping and slowly spinning to the floor. Naota knew exactly what the sound was, where it was coming from, but knew it was much too late to make a move to dodge in any direction whatsoever.
BOOM! The panel that acted as Naota's door was blown apart as a roaring yellow Vespa smashed through, sending Naota flying head over heels right out his window and spiraling with a magnificent "UMPH!" into the concrete sidewalk below. Seconds later, Kamon landed in a huge heap beside him, raising his bruised face and smiled in a daze, several teeth seemed to be missing, before passing out.
" Hey Ta-kun! I decided to refuse your dad's offer of staying in his room and staying in yours! We're roommates again!" Haruko leaned out of the massive opening that used to be a delicate window in Naota's room, still seated upon her Vespa that she had charged Kamon with. "Oh and I get top bunk! " she called out again, a sharp grin came to her face before she poked back into the house. Moments later the yellow Vespa revved then screeched as Haruko threw it into reverse. From within the house came sounds of harsh swearing from Naota's grandfather, glass shattering, and several unameable objects breaking into pieces.
" Uhh…Ta-kun, you might want to have your toilet fixed, your grandfather broke it with his head! " Haruko called loudly from deep within the depths of his once clean and neat house. Vulgar swearing seemed to come nearly immediately after the self-proclaimed alien woman had blamed a broken toilet on Naota's grandfather, but it was suddenly muffled.
" Sometimes, I just wonder, why me? " Naota asked himself, slowly gathering himself up and bravely marching into his house, preparing to brave whatever terrors Haruko had unleashed upon his family's simple abode.
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DUNUNUNUNUNU BLANG BLANG BLANG REEOOOOOWWWWW
Haruko had been playing her bass for the last 5 hours while Naota and Shigekuni had gone about cleaning up their house. Kamon was still out on the street, groaning, but no one really paid him any attention. The massive hole in Naota's wall was now boarded up, though the carpentry was somewhat shoddy, it kept the cold wind out.
" So if x equals negative b plus or minus the square root of b squared…." the stressed teenager was now yelling to himself in an attempt to compete with the extreme bass playing that Haruko was unleashing on the house and nearly half the block. He had school tomorrow, and like it or not, he needed to keep his grades up and that meant being able to think!
" It's been a long time since I rock and rollllleeedddd…." Haruko sang, none to expertly either, and slammed some more chords out, so loud that Naota was almost certain she'd blow up this amplifier too, heck the entire neighborhood was close shorting out on electricity.
" THAT'S IT!!!!" Naota yelled, enraged now, snapping his pencil into pieces and shoving himself back from his desk. Haruko stopped playing, a blank look on her face as she watched Naota get up, almost calmly, then suddenly grab hold of her bass and try and break it over his knee.
A long moment passed as the bass neck seem to just sit across the top of Naota's knee, the teenage boy staying in that position for long seconds, seemingly frozen in time, his eyes as wide as saucer plates.
" Uh-oh…" Haruko said innocently, a surprised expression painted across her attractive features as she watched Naota slowly shake. Her face slowly turned into an innocent grin however as Naota threw up the bass, flailed his arms, and grabbed his knee, hopping about his room.
" HOLY %$(&$! MOTHER %%$ MONKEY $$$%##!!!" Naota swore enough to make a truck driver or even his father wince as he flailed wildly at his injured knee, smashing into and knocking over several things in his room. Haruko began to laugh, rather hard, putting a hand over her mouth then grabbing her sides. It was all exaggerated, however, just to piss of Naota who took the bait.
" Haruko!!!!" Naota threatened the alien woman, gingerly letting go of his abused knee and turning an icy glare on her. He was about to take a step when Haruko did something that made him stop dead. Haruko slowly raised her bass into what she could trademark as the N-O Channel swing.
" Uh….Wai-" Naota never finished as Haruko's face curled up into a huge smile and began to let fly with giant swipes in the tiny room with her bass, all viciously aimed for Naota's exposed head.
" Ack! No Wait! Haruko, what in hell are you doing!? " Naota managed to asked, jumping aside at another brain mashing blow, deftly sliding under another as missed strikes further tore up his room. Somehow, by instinct, Naota managed to dodge most of her swings, and decided to step within her range. Haruko , according to Naota's plan, stopped swinging, but very unexpectedly grabbed him by the collar with her free hand and dragged him in close, smashing her lips to his in a ferocious kiss that took him completely by surprise.
With a deft twist of the wrist, Haruko hurled Naota back into an ideal striking range, pulled back and swung extra hard, before Naota could come out of his dazed embarrassment. The bass contact with a loud chord accompanying it as Naota was hurled straight through the boards covering up the hole in the wall as if they were nothing. The surprised teenager fell all the way back down to his previous spot on the parking lot.
Haruko jumped down after Naota, gracefully landing on the sidewalk and walking up to Naota's prone body, ignoring the still groaning heap that was Kamon situated nearby. She muttered something about how she had hoped that she hadn't killed him as she prodded Naota's body with her right toe, her Rickenbacker bass placed over her left shoulder, a somewhat concerned look on her face. She expected her Ta-kun to recover a little quicker like he had years ago when she had first bashed him on the head.
Naota, having only blacked out momentarily, quickly reached up and grabbed Haruko by her waist, pulling her down and rolling over, pinning her down under him, surprising Haruko only momentarily but she never showed it.
" If I knew Ta-kun had missed me THAT much, maybe I would have come back sooner!" Haruko giggled from her pinned position, knowing full well she could throw him right off her and smack him around a bit for as long as she wanted, his skull had always proven thick enough.
" Why the HELL did you just hit me with your bass!? Atomsk, you know, the Pirate King who you left me to pursue, CAME OUT ALREADY!" Naota was breathing hard, anger filled his voice and his face was all red as he struggled through the monumental headache that seemed determined to make him feel like it was going to blow apart at just about any moment.
" To open a N-O Channel of course. I didn't think I hit you THAT hard Ta-kun, sheesh, it's as if the guy never got hit with a bass before.." Haruko rolled her eyes as the answer seemed so obvious that Naota may have asked what color the sky was.
" What is the POINT, though? Atomsk left!" A confused Naota asked, becoming exasperated by the second with the sing-song and nonchalant ways of Haruko, who still lay pinned beneath him.
" Because Ta-kun…" Haruko's voice grew softer, moving her head forward so that her mouth was almost next to his left ear, " YOU'VE GOT THE MOST CONDUCTIVE N-O CHANNEL CONDUCTOR IN THE UNIVERSE!!!!!" Haruko yelled into Naota's ear, before throwing him off like a rag doll, picking him up and laying a big sloppy kiss on him, dumping him behind her and heading back into the house, humming the same song she had been playing earlier on the bass, leaving a confused Naota on the sidewalk staring up at the sky.
" THAT STILL DOESN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION!" The teenage boy yelled, scrambling to his feet and running inside his home to try and wrench some real answers from Haruko.