This fic is as fake as pie. And pie is as fake as Brittany Spears.
MetallicaOffspring Jen: This fic is dedicated to all the flamers out there. And another thing. You know the anonymous guy with the spanish names that flames us? Here's something for him:
YOU FUCKING SUCK MAN YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! DAMN YOU TO HELL!
He fucking destroyed the entire plot and base of my story! And it was going to be a really good and long story! FUCK YOU, DICKWAD!
Anyways, continue on reading.
-----------------------------------------------
Naruto sat at his computers. It was a laptop, all black and shiny, with the evil, evil, EVIL Windows ME installed onto it's hardrive. Oh, the horror he must have. Naruto looked smug as he read a long paragraph. His sapphire eyes moved along with the text, double-taking over some words of which he didn't understand. It took him only seconds to realize that what hewas reading, was fluffly. "Yuck!"
The blue light from the screen filled the room. The sun was down and the moon was up, hiding behind the clouds. Uzumaki Naruto was all alone in his apartment, reading what appeared to be...a FANFIC! YES! He was on a fanfiction site and was reading a fanfic about everyday life. The site, fanfic genre, and the category will be ledt unknown for we wouldn't want an unhappy ending or losing you in a though of "What?!"
Suddenly, Naruto broke out in laughter. A sinister, evil laugh. A laugh so menaical, he fell over onto his feather pillow, sending the down floating in the air as if it were snow. His ass ran off. Out of his pants, and out the open window. "No, my ass! It ran off!" This only caused him to laugh harder. His shirt caught on his arm as he tried to get up that he fell over and tumbled around on the floor, his notebook still standing upon his bed. The cold tile floor connected with his ear and whickered cheek. Naruto still continued to laugh in a frightening way.
"HAHA...snort...That...laugh...is one...meniacle laugh..piece of shit fanfic!!!"
He managed to pull himself up off the floor enough to sit up, still laughing hard. He looked up at his bed, where his computer's blue light glowed throughout the room. What fanfic could suck so bad that he must have his ass go running off into the moonlight after it jumped through a window? Easy:
The light slowly creeped in through the window as to wash over the face of the young boy. He was asleep in his home, cuddling his stuffed weasel toy. His chest gently rose and fell with each precious breath he took. The weasel toy was snuggly wrapped in his arms, the boy nibbling on its ear.
"Oh I....."
Yes, that was what the fox boy read. The ever so fluffy fanfic. Naruto was up late tonight, apparently waking from a dream about ramen. Oh yes, ramen. His dreams called to him as a ramen packet magically found its way to his hand while he woke in the kitchen. Noticing he had left his laptop on, he went back to it. Naruto raised his hand and wiped a tear from his ocean-blue eyes. "I'm gonna leave a review!" he laughed.
The blonde calmed down enough to actually crawl back up onto the bed and into a sitting position, the laptop in his...lap.Itjust sat there as he ran his finger over the mouse pad till he came upon the review link. He lightly tapped the pad on top of the link, relaying a small pop up. Naruto's grin spread from ear to ear as he typed up his review.
Reviwer's Name: RamenFoxyBox
Signed or Anonymous: Anonymous
Review: This really SUCKS! Bigtime! Who wants to read about a boy who chews on a stuffed weasel and dreams of having sex with another boy?! THIS FUCKING SUCKS! You are such a loser. You must be gay, gaywad. Weak... Delete this story! Delete this story! IT SUX! IT SUX! IT SUX! Was this s'possed to be a heart warming fic? What boy chews on his own doll? What boy even has a doll? It makes him sound like a tranni! What the hell are you? A teddy bear? Come up with a real fic! What boy looks like a girl?!
Naruto had finished some time later. Uzumaki had just flamed a fanfic. It was not sarcastic critisism either. It was a pure flame. A flame that would start the brush fire. It was now 3:00 AM. "Heh...I hope he gets this!" the Vessel snickered as he clicked the submit button. The popup suddenly changed into a thank you screen and closed. He must wait that 24 hours for his review to be updated. Oh, the suspension! Who knows what would happen soon? Naruto slowly yawned and shut his notebook down, folding it up and placing it in its bag.
He slipped on his very odd night cap and crawled under his yellow bed sheets that had green Konoha-leaf-symbols all over them. "Mmm.... Ramen..." He purred as his eyelids slowly shut. Good night, Naruto. You will need your rest for the new day ahead!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Lonelyninja logged onto his fanfiction account. He scrolled down to his collection of fics and clicked on the link of his latest masterpiece. His computer cast a blue mask on his sharp eyes as he searched for new reviews. It was now 1:47:03 PM and the author was under porch of his luxurious manision, of which he aquired from being the only one to recieve it.
The birds rested in the trees abpve him and in the nests on the eaves of his house. There were thousands--enough to have an army! (At Wayne Akers Ford, there is really an army of pigeons in the roof of the parts department)
The author read his latest reviews. Each and everyone of them was charming and sweet--untill he came to IT. Very cautiously he moved the mouse and clicked the link. His eyes glazed over the comment. He did double and triple takes of each line. His expression went from serious to hurt in a split second. He read the flame. The flame that ignited the fire.
Lonelyninja scowled at his computer and instantaneously shut the moniter off and on, hoping the screen wouldn't have been there. Unfortunately. The author looked exceptionally hurt now. Why? WHY?! The pain. The flame. The rain.
"AHHHHHHH!! FLLLLAAAAMMMMEEEEEERRRRRSSSSSS!!!!" he yelled out of his screened porch. The army of birds was disturbed and scarred. The whole flock took off in a frenzy.
"FLAMeRS! I ACTUALLY GOT A FLAME! THEY WILL PAy! WHO IS RAME---!!!" It dawned on the flamed author.
"NAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOO!"
To be continued....
---------------------------------------------
MO: I hope it was okay. Next chap'll be better.
Jen: It better! I wanna see Naruto get is ass kicked!
Mizumi: But his ass ran off.
MO: In chap 2, Naru gets his ass found, reattached and kicked and Itachi'll get flamed by many.
Jen: Even us?
Mo: No. 10/4 means over and out!
MetallicaOffspring Jen: This fic is dedicated to all the flamers out there. And another thing. You know the anonymous guy with the spanish names that flames us? Here's something for him:
YOU FUCKING SUCK MAN YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! DAMN YOU TO HELL!
He fucking destroyed the entire plot and base of my story! And it was going to be a really good and long story! FUCK YOU, DICKWAD!
Anyways, continue on reading.
-----------------------------------------------
Naruto sat at his computers. It was a laptop, all black and shiny, with the evil, evil, EVIL Windows ME installed onto it's hardrive. Oh, the horror he must have. Naruto looked smug as he read a long paragraph. His sapphire eyes moved along with the text, double-taking over some words of which he didn't understand. It took him only seconds to realize that what hewas reading, was fluffly. "Yuck!"
The blue light from the screen filled the room. The sun was down and the moon was up, hiding behind the clouds. Uzumaki Naruto was all alone in his apartment, reading what appeared to be...a FANFIC! YES! He was on a fanfiction site and was reading a fanfic about everyday life. The site, fanfic genre, and the category will be ledt unknown for we wouldn't want an unhappy ending or losing you in a though of "What?!"
Suddenly, Naruto broke out in laughter. A sinister, evil laugh. A laugh so menaical, he fell over onto his feather pillow, sending the down floating in the air as if it were snow. His ass ran off. Out of his pants, and out the open window. "No, my ass! It ran off!" This only caused him to laugh harder. His shirt caught on his arm as he tried to get up that he fell over and tumbled around on the floor, his notebook still standing upon his bed. The cold tile floor connected with his ear and whickered cheek. Naruto still continued to laugh in a frightening way.
"HAHA...snort...That...laugh...is one...meniacle laugh..piece of shit fanfic!!!"
He managed to pull himself up off the floor enough to sit up, still laughing hard. He looked up at his bed, where his computer's blue light glowed throughout the room. What fanfic could suck so bad that he must have his ass go running off into the moonlight after it jumped through a window? Easy:
The light slowly creeped in through the window as to wash over the face of the young boy. He was asleep in his home, cuddling his stuffed weasel toy. His chest gently rose and fell with each precious breath he took. The weasel toy was snuggly wrapped in his arms, the boy nibbling on its ear.
"Oh I....."
Yes, that was what the fox boy read. The ever so fluffy fanfic. Naruto was up late tonight, apparently waking from a dream about ramen. Oh yes, ramen. His dreams called to him as a ramen packet magically found its way to his hand while he woke in the kitchen. Noticing he had left his laptop on, he went back to it. Naruto raised his hand and wiped a tear from his ocean-blue eyes. "I'm gonna leave a review!" he laughed.
The blonde calmed down enough to actually crawl back up onto the bed and into a sitting position, the laptop in his...lap.Itjust sat there as he ran his finger over the mouse pad till he came upon the review link. He lightly tapped the pad on top of the link, relaying a small pop up. Naruto's grin spread from ear to ear as he typed up his review.
Reviwer's Name: RamenFoxyBox
Signed or Anonymous: Anonymous
Review: This really SUCKS! Bigtime! Who wants to read about a boy who chews on a stuffed weasel and dreams of having sex with another boy?! THIS FUCKING SUCKS! You are such a loser. You must be gay, gaywad. Weak... Delete this story! Delete this story! IT SUX! IT SUX! IT SUX! Was this s'possed to be a heart warming fic? What boy chews on his own doll? What boy even has a doll? It makes him sound like a tranni! What the hell are you? A teddy bear? Come up with a real fic! What boy looks like a girl?!
Naruto had finished some time later. Uzumaki had just flamed a fanfic. It was not sarcastic critisism either. It was a pure flame. A flame that would start the brush fire. It was now 3:00 AM. "Heh...I hope he gets this!" the Vessel snickered as he clicked the submit button. The popup suddenly changed into a thank you screen and closed. He must wait that 24 hours for his review to be updated. Oh, the suspension! Who knows what would happen soon? Naruto slowly yawned and shut his notebook down, folding it up and placing it in its bag.
He slipped on his very odd night cap and crawled under his yellow bed sheets that had green Konoha-leaf-symbols all over them. "Mmm.... Ramen..." He purred as his eyelids slowly shut. Good night, Naruto. You will need your rest for the new day ahead!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Lonelyninja logged onto his fanfiction account. He scrolled down to his collection of fics and clicked on the link of his latest masterpiece. His computer cast a blue mask on his sharp eyes as he searched for new reviews. It was now 1:47:03 PM and the author was under porch of his luxurious manision, of which he aquired from being the only one to recieve it.
The birds rested in the trees abpve him and in the nests on the eaves of his house. There were thousands--enough to have an army! (At Wayne Akers Ford, there is really an army of pigeons in the roof of the parts department)
The author read his latest reviews. Each and everyone of them was charming and sweet--untill he came to IT. Very cautiously he moved the mouse and clicked the link. His eyes glazed over the comment. He did double and triple takes of each line. His expression went from serious to hurt in a split second. He read the flame. The flame that ignited the fire.
Lonelyninja scowled at his computer and instantaneously shut the moniter off and on, hoping the screen wouldn't have been there. Unfortunately. The author looked exceptionally hurt now. Why? WHY?! The pain. The flame. The rain.
"AHHHHHHH!! FLLLLAAAAMMMMEEEEEERRRRRSSSSSS!!!!" he yelled out of his screened porch. The army of birds was disturbed and scarred. The whole flock took off in a frenzy.
"FLAMeRS! I ACTUALLY GOT A FLAME! THEY WILL PAy! WHO IS RAME---!!!" It dawned on the flamed author.
"NAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOO!"
To be continued....
---------------------------------------------
MO: I hope it was okay. Next chap'll be better.
Jen: It better! I wanna see Naruto get is ass kicked!
Mizumi: But his ass ran off.
MO: In chap 2, Naru gets his ass found, reattached and kicked and Itachi'll get flamed by many.
Jen: Even us?
Mo: No. 10/4 means over and out!