Right, here is chapter two. Am kind of uncertain about the part where
Harry describes his first three years but hopefully it gets my (his) point
across.
Anyway on with chapter two. Hope you like it (
Chapter Two This Is Me.
The biggest secret I possess the truth about my feelings towards Draco Malfoy. I suppose its not surprising really because my feelings towards him scare me too. The truth is I do not dislike him, my feelings run deeper than that. I hate him; I think I hate him more than I hate Voldemort.
There, isn't that shocking. The golden boy can't hate the murderer of his parents more than some petty schoolboy rival. The hero is meant to hate the villain not the henchman. But I can't.
I disliked Malfoy from our first meeting and that dislike born out of feelings of inadequacy soon flourished into a far more potent and rewarding hatred.
People speak of Voldemort in hushed voices, not daring to speak his name even when he was barely alive. So I was told about 'You-Know-Who' - only the problem was I didn't. He was a name, a game almost. First year we did what? Followed an unpleasant teacher around joking of conspiracy and similar as if we were Quincy only to have it climax in an obstacle course and me talking to the back of another teachers head. Second year I talk to snakes, dress up as other classmates, stalk another Professor - OK so avoid like hell most of the time - and end up fighting a ghost and a snake with the help of a phoenix and a talking hat. Then third year a werewolf friend of my parents turns up, another friend of my parents attacks a talking painting and my friends bed before turning out to be a good guy and also have the ability to turn into a dog. And this time the real villain is my friend's rat, also a friend of my parents.
It all sounds quite ridiculous really. This was the great evil I was meant to fear but it never seemed real. It was almost a game at times, excitement and intrigue but no real threat because Dumbledore was there watching over us. We felt safe even if we did not know we were. So until fourth year Voldemort was this unreal threat while Malfoy was there, everyday attacking me, attacking my friends, attacking my family and attacking my beliefs.
Voldemort can kill me, will kill me I'm sure, but Malfoy, Malfoy can hurt me. He is there day in day out hurting me in a way Voldemort can not even begin to comprehend. Because he knows me in a way Voldemort can never do. To him I am real, a real person with flaws and caprices but I sometimes think Voldemort still sees me as the baby he couldn't kill all those years ago. He has watched me change, watched me form attachments and dislikes, watched me at work and at play, to him I am three dimensional and that makes him able to hate me and hurt me in a way Voldemort can never achieve. He knows that when I beat him to the snitch or win a fight that I have won it, game over, erase the slate, start again. Voldemort is stuck playing the same game, wanting to kill me himself, imagining I have learnt nothing, that I still escape with luck alone. And that is why I win, in the end, because he can not see me, will not see me. I am getting more powerful, I can feel it. Every time I learn something new it surges through me, ever since the summoning charm. Overcoming my block as regards them made everything else easy because no matter how hard a charm was to learn it was never *that* hard. But he doesn't see it. He could learn from Malfoy. Malfoy watches me as I do him, looking for weaknesses, opportunities, anything I can give him and he knows me but sometimes I think Voldemort is expecting to find me lying in a crib waiting for him to kill me.
But I won't lie down, roll over and play dead.
I will fight.
Malfoy knows this, uses this and that is why I can hate him more than Voldemort.
Though I probably shouldn't.
Chapter three coming soonish. This will be Draco's point of view and is being really mean - Draco isn't very good at expressing his hate for Harry (keeps coming out as love - oops!) but I'm working on it.
Anyway on with chapter two. Hope you like it (
Chapter Two This Is Me.
The biggest secret I possess the truth about my feelings towards Draco Malfoy. I suppose its not surprising really because my feelings towards him scare me too. The truth is I do not dislike him, my feelings run deeper than that. I hate him; I think I hate him more than I hate Voldemort.
There, isn't that shocking. The golden boy can't hate the murderer of his parents more than some petty schoolboy rival. The hero is meant to hate the villain not the henchman. But I can't.
I disliked Malfoy from our first meeting and that dislike born out of feelings of inadequacy soon flourished into a far more potent and rewarding hatred.
People speak of Voldemort in hushed voices, not daring to speak his name even when he was barely alive. So I was told about 'You-Know-Who' - only the problem was I didn't. He was a name, a game almost. First year we did what? Followed an unpleasant teacher around joking of conspiracy and similar as if we were Quincy only to have it climax in an obstacle course and me talking to the back of another teachers head. Second year I talk to snakes, dress up as other classmates, stalk another Professor - OK so avoid like hell most of the time - and end up fighting a ghost and a snake with the help of a phoenix and a talking hat. Then third year a werewolf friend of my parents turns up, another friend of my parents attacks a talking painting and my friends bed before turning out to be a good guy and also have the ability to turn into a dog. And this time the real villain is my friend's rat, also a friend of my parents.
It all sounds quite ridiculous really. This was the great evil I was meant to fear but it never seemed real. It was almost a game at times, excitement and intrigue but no real threat because Dumbledore was there watching over us. We felt safe even if we did not know we were. So until fourth year Voldemort was this unreal threat while Malfoy was there, everyday attacking me, attacking my friends, attacking my family and attacking my beliefs.
Voldemort can kill me, will kill me I'm sure, but Malfoy, Malfoy can hurt me. He is there day in day out hurting me in a way Voldemort can not even begin to comprehend. Because he knows me in a way Voldemort can never do. To him I am real, a real person with flaws and caprices but I sometimes think Voldemort still sees me as the baby he couldn't kill all those years ago. He has watched me change, watched me form attachments and dislikes, watched me at work and at play, to him I am three dimensional and that makes him able to hate me and hurt me in a way Voldemort can never achieve. He knows that when I beat him to the snitch or win a fight that I have won it, game over, erase the slate, start again. Voldemort is stuck playing the same game, wanting to kill me himself, imagining I have learnt nothing, that I still escape with luck alone. And that is why I win, in the end, because he can not see me, will not see me. I am getting more powerful, I can feel it. Every time I learn something new it surges through me, ever since the summoning charm. Overcoming my block as regards them made everything else easy because no matter how hard a charm was to learn it was never *that* hard. But he doesn't see it. He could learn from Malfoy. Malfoy watches me as I do him, looking for weaknesses, opportunities, anything I can give him and he knows me but sometimes I think Voldemort is expecting to find me lying in a crib waiting for him to kill me.
But I won't lie down, roll over and play dead.
I will fight.
Malfoy knows this, uses this and that is why I can hate him more than Voldemort.
Though I probably shouldn't.
Chapter three coming soonish. This will be Draco's point of view and is being really mean - Draco isn't very good at expressing his hate for Harry (keeps coming out as love - oops!) but I'm working on it.