.hackOBLIVION

'Here we stand in ravishing rain,

joy is like pain,

it feels like a miracle.

You can't turn back, you're in chains,

never again

return from a cynical world.'

-Cynical World, Yuki Kajiura

I

Tsukasa picked up the bulky headset, the electronic gadget that would let her access The World once more, that would let her see Subaru once more. Yet she hesitated. It had been barely a month ago when The World had been her only world, as she had been trapped inside the game by the malignant entity named Morgana, unable to log out, her memories twisted and fragmented. An irrational fear of being trapped again gnawed at the back of her mind, and questions that could only be described as paranoid raced through her mind. The promise she had made to Subaru was victorious against her fears, though, and she slowly put the gadget in front of her eyes, and logged on, once again, into The World that had once been the dreamscape for her nightmare.

In a moment she stood beside the spinning blue circle that had let her into this world, a familiar landscape of grass around her, a familiar sky above, and a familiar sea of clouds below, as the grass ended in an abrupt precipice. It almost seemed more familiar than the comparatively grey and boring world of her real life. She realized why she hadn't wanted to go back to that ridiculous, angry, boring world. The only thing in the real world worth the effort was Subaru, so the irony in having to go virtual to see her was absolute.

Tsukasa banished such grim thoughts from her mind and smiled, reminding herself the reason she had come here: the reunion with her friends. She set out to the place of meeting, the grass brushing against her legs. She then also realized she didn't feel the grass, or the air on her face. She felt numb and strange; everything had been so vivid before, now this felt like a parody of a dream, a dream that would never come true. She realized she wouldn't be able to feel Subaru, to feel her warmth when she touched her. Yet something was better than nothing. She stepped forward onto the grass she didn't feel and, suddenly, unbearable pain shot through her, like someone had stuck red hot needles into her head. Her vision went cloudy and she felt dizzy. She fell onto the grass and, just before losing consciousness, she felt a sharp pain on her right cheek. A blade of grass had cut her.

II

Subaru and Mimiru sat on the edge of a grassy precipice. Subaru's elegant face was contorted into an expression of concern, Mimiru's, however, showed annoyance and impatience.

"He's always late", said Mimiru, "he so has no consideration for other people. We've been waiting here for over two hours and he doesn't even care"

Subaru turned towards her friend with a frown. They had been waiting here for a long time, and she could understand Mimiru's irritation, but that still was no reason to badmouth Tsukasa.

"Tsukasa only used to be late because she didn't have a clock like we do. And Tsukasa is she." Subaru said, firmly. "I'm sure something must have… happened to her, and she can't come"

Mimiru huffed. "Whatever. I'm certainly not waiting any longer. Just send me a message when he comes along"

With that she got up and walked off, hoisting her sword behind her head and grumbling about Tsukasa under her breath. Subaru looked down into the sea of white clouds, wishing with all her heart that Mimiru's supposition were right and not hers. If something had happened to Tsukasa, she didn't know what she'd do.

"Subaru?" an older, male voice asked from behind her. She turned around to face Bear. He looked tired, beaten, his face grim. The big and muscular barbarian character now seemed weak and defeated. She knew why he was here and could feel the tears threatening to rise to her eyes as she asked:

"What happened to Tsukasa?"

Bear looked down and took a deep breath. When he spoke his voice was steady and clear, but she could see that the old man was distressed. This was bad, really bad.

"Something happened when she logged in to The World…" he paused a moment, picking up the courage to tell her, "She had a stroke. There was extensive damage to her brain, it seems… she's… she's brain dead, Subaru, machines keep her alive for now, but they won't last forever… she… it's almost impossible for her to recover"

Tears had been running down Subaru's face for some time already, but now she buried her face in her hands and sobbed weakly. Her voice coming out weak and strangled when she said:

"No… it can't... it can't be true"

III

A man in a perfectly clean, crisp suit sat in front of a computer in his office. This office was surprisingly stark and boring, without a spark of humanity. Grey walls, grey floor, grey roof, grey files, grey plastic furniture. Nothing could be seen in the office except grey and the black and white of printed documents. The man worked on and on at his computer, typing in an endless series of reports, notes and projects. It was difficult to imagine this man doing anything else. Then, a note of discord: another man in a perfectly clean, crisp suit rushed into the office with a worried face. The face of one who has been selected to carry the blame of many. His voice was nervous and rushed. It seemed very out of place compared to his crisp, perfect suit.

"Sir, subject epsilon-delta-omega has escaped!"

The working person finished writing the sentence he had been interrupted in, calmly. He then slowly turned around and looked at the nervous man. His voice was calm, steady and rational, of course. It seemed impossible that the working person would have any other sort of voice.

"Order his immediate recapture. Subject epsilon-delta-omega is vital for our project."

The nervous man nodded, with the half-hopeful face of one who doesn't know if he has escaped the blame or just delayed it for a while.

"Yes, sir" he said, and rushed back out of the room.

IV

Tsukasa slowly stood up. He wasn't very sure what had happened, but he must've tripped over a rock while he was thinking about other things. He reprimanded himself mentally for being so distracted and clumsy, even inside a game, and set off towards the place where he was supposed to meet Subaru.

When he saw Subaru with her head between her hands, turquoise strands of hair hanging down, hiding her face from sight, Tsukasa ran towards her. She didn't even look up when he approached and he could now hear her crying. He knelt down beside her, put a hand on her shoulder, gently, and softly asked:

"What's the matter, Subaru?"

She looked round at him and her eyes widened in surprise. She slowly brought her hand up to touch his cheek, as if she wanted to see if he was real, and was afraid that he wasn't. He could feel the wetness of her tears on the hand as it touched him; he thought there was something strange about this, but couldn't recall what exactly it was.

"Tsukasa" she said, almost inaudibly, as if still not absolutely believing it.

Tsukasa looked at Subaru, puzzled. He couldn't understand why she was acting this way, they had agreed to meet here, after all.

"Of course it's me, Subaru," he said, "who did you expect?"

"But… how…" she began, and then a dark suspicion began to dawn on her. Something happened when he logged into The World, Bear had said, the machines are keeping him alive. She fervently hoped she was wrong, that Bear had been wrong, somehow, or that everything had just been a nightmare. Yet she had to know.

"Tsukasa… log out" she asked.

The young Wavemaster looked at her with increasing puzzlement. He didn't know what could've happened for Subaru to be acting so strangely now. Why would she want him to leave?

"But Subaru, why? I don't understand," he asked in return.

"Just… try and log out, Tsukasa… and then log back in… please"

Tsukasa thought it was strange. After all, Subaru was the one that had always told him not to be afraid of not being able to log back out. She had always said it was an irrational fear and that it couldn't happen again. Why this now? Nevertheless, he decided to try. After all, relogging was no trouble, and he could understand how she could maybe be worried about it. He sighed, stood up, and lifted his staff to the sky activating the command to log out.

He waited.

Nothing happened, absolutely nothing.

He felt numb as dark fear gripped him, and it slowly dawned on him. He had felt Subaru's tears and he was feeling the grass below his feet. Like the sensation of being in a dream and slowly realizing it's become a nightmare you cannot wake up from all the small things came to him: the feeling of the cold air on his face, the smell of Subaru's perfume, the coldness of the staff between his fingers.

He felt the staff drop from his numb fingers and clatter to the floor, heard Subaru gasp and start to cry again, felt his mind awakening just to find itself inside a nightmare.

V

Mimiru swung her sword at the monster's head in one last strike. When the blow connected the image of the beast turned grey and slowly faded away, leaving only Mimiru.

"Ah, that feels better" she said aloud.

Beating up monsters was the best method of relieving frustration, and saying she was frustrated at Tsukasa was a great understatement. She was absolutely furious. She was really looking forward to talking to Tsukasa again. At least Subaru had been able to talk to Tsukasa almost every week on the phone, but since they'd both gone to Shimokita together a month ago Mimiru hadn't heard a word from her strange friend. She wasn't really angry because of that, though. Anger was just her own particular way of pushing worse ideas out of her head. Something's happened to her, Subaru had said. Mimiru didn't want to believe that. She cared about Tsukasa more than she'd ever admit to anyone.

She turned around to start walking back out of the dungeon and stopped. She was now facing what looked like a Wavemaster, but of a style she had never seen before. Raven black hair fell disorderedly around a pale face. A white cheek was marked with three strange symbols tattooed in red, the first one looked like a Latin "E", the second was a small triangle, and the third seemed to be like an "O" cut off at the bottom. Blue-grey eyes looked at her dreamily, as if he wasn't fully concentrated in what he was seeing. He wore a white robe with multiple designs in a golden metal that fell to the floor around his feet. The Wavemaster's staff he was holding ended in four sharp prongs that cupped around a crimson sphere that floated just barely untouched by the spikes. He somehow reminded him of Tsukasa as she had first met him… maybe it was that lost expression. She decided to make conversation and find out more about this strange character.

"Hi there!" she said, "I didn't know I had company. You rarely see a Wavemaster working alone, you must be pretty…" she felt an overwhelming sense of déjà vu, "…tough"

Why had she said those words and exactly those words? Maybe it was because she had been thinking of Tsukasa. Yes, that was the most logical explanation. It still felt weird. The Wavemaster just stood there, looking at her. It was all so familiar in a way. She almost expected him to take out a Sprite Ocarina and disappear. Yet he didn't do that. Instead, he spoke with a dazed voice that matched the look in his eyes.

"I… suppose so"

Mimiru was relieved. It had all been her imagination. This wasn't Tsukasa; he was just a normal player with a strange character, at most maybe a hacker. She could be so silly sometimes! She smiled at the stranger.

"What's your name?" she asked.

The Wavemaster hesitated and frowned slightly, as if trying to remember something that was just on the tip of his tongue. When he answered it was slowly and carefully, like someone who isn't very sure about a word.

"Edo"

"Edo, eh?" it was a strange name, but in The World you could get all sorts of weird names anyway, why was she being so paranoid? "What are you doing down here all alone?"

Edo looked at her strangely, as if he hadn't fully understood the question. The answer was short and slow, as if he was unsure of the language.

"I was… looking around"

He was really slow answering, but it didn't mean anything, he possibly didn't know Japanese all that well. People in The World sometimes came from all kinds of faraway countries. When everything weird that happened had a logical explanation, why did this guy still send shivers down her spine?

She was about to ask another question when a faint beep alerted her of incoming mail. It was Bear, telling her to go back to Dun Loireag urgently. Something about Tsukasa, it seemed. She smiled with the prospect of speaking with Tsukasa and glanced one last time at Edo. It was possibly nothing but… she inputted a small command into her terminal before waving to the strange Wavemaster and running off.

Edo looked at her go away with his strange, unfocused stare. She had already disappeared in the darkness when his lips moved to say:

"Goodbye"