AUTHOR'S NOTE: well I'm back and it's a fairly long chapter folks.
Can I just say a huge thank you to everyone who helped me resolve my Ron/Hermione crises? I know where I'm going now thanks to all you lovely people. I won't give any clues, but hopefully you won't be disappointed.
Confession: I really haven't read this through – I just wanted to post something. I need a beta I think. Any volunteers?
(Also need someone to bounce ideas off for Deal if someone is willing.)
Hope this isn't too bad.
On with chapter eighteen.
Chapter Eighteen: A Taste of Things to ComeHermione Granger stood in front of the mirror, locked in indecision.
"You look lovely my dear," it assured her, "a bit scandalous for my tastes, but lovely."
"Are you sure," she asked and, if mirrors could have sighed that one would have done. Then again if mirrors could kick people out then it would have done so half an hour earlier.
Instead it just looked at her, letting her infer what she would from the silence.
"Right, I'll go then," she nodded to the mirror, to distracted to give her usual goodbye.
"You'll be brilliant my dear," it called after her, settling down for a long, uninterrupted nap.
***
The common room was about half full when Hermione bounced in – bounced because she liked to appear confident even when she wasn't. And as Tigger remarked, bouncing is a wonderful thing.
"Wow 'Mione looking sexy," Seamus whistled at the now furiously blushing head girl as she entered the Gryffindor common room.
"'Mione," Ron kissed her, looking slightly panicked, "I didn't forget, honest, I just, just..."
"Didn't forget what?"
"Birthday," she shook her head, "anniversary?" again a negative, "then why are you dressed so, so..."
"I'm just going to Hogsmeade with Pansy, Ron."
"With Parkinson," he frowned, "so it's like that is it."
"What ever do you mean
"Well look at yourself, you never dressed up like that for me."
As Hermione began to look rather confused Seamus wondered if he should attempt to explain that the clothes were just standard muggle fare, but his sense of self preservation was stronger than any Gryffindor bravery, after all, Harry Potter's foolish disregard for personal safety was not something that rubbed off on others.
"Like what?"
"Like a bloody pro-scarlet woman," he changed tack at the last minute - not even Ron was that stupid.
"Ron," she almost laughed but she was rather angry, "I'm going to Hogsmeade with my friends, nothing drastic or remotely scarlet related."
"Friends?"
"Yes, Seamus, Blaise, Pansy and I," she shot Seamus an apologetic look as Ron rounded on him.
"You're going out with my girlfirend?"
"Yes...no...yes...well rather..." 'Where the fuck is Harry when you need him,' Seamus cursed.
"Look Ron, I'm going down to Hogsmeade with my friends and as my kind, caring boyfriend I'm sure you'll give me a kiss and wave me goodbye," Hermione offered him an out...he didn't accept.
"Not dressed like that you're not," he shouted, face flaming with anger as he tried to make Hermione understand.
"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that Ron Weasley," she replied coolly, "come on Seamus."
Her Irish friend followed her out of the common room, soon having to run to keep up with her. Finally they were outside and Hermione stopped, staring at the lake, tears in her eyes.
"Hey, don't look like that Hermy," he spoke softly, the name five year old Harry had given her causing her to smile up at him tearfully.
"Do I look that bad," she half whispered, "I just wanted to feel like me."
"You look stunning," he said honestly, "it's just that, in a world where less than three layers is considered daring, muggle clothes can be a bit...shocking. You're not exactly Becky Sharpe."
"I could be, if I wanted," she teased, smiling without threatening tears now.
"Of that I have no doubt," he grinned back at her, "you are quite the looker Miss Granger. In fact, you look a little too hot for my little Hermy," he picked her up, holding her over the lake, "maybe you should be cooled down."
"Seamus Finnegan don't you dare," she began kicking out at him, "put me down right now or I'll...I'll..."
"You'll what, Miss Becky?"
"Do you really want to know," another voice interrupted and he turned to see Pansy and Blaise watching them curiously.
"Probably not," Seamus admitted, putting her down.
"Gryffindors," Pansy looked baffled, "I'll never understand them. And you know she's Hermione right?"
"Not today, today she's Becky."
"Um...ok," Pansy just looked baffled.
"We could have a new name for you my dear," he continued, putting his arm around her shoulder as they walked towards Hogsmeade, "lets see, you're witty, intelligent, independent...you could be Elizabeth Bennett...or a blonde Lara Croft," he grinned, knowing he could get away with the comparison safely.
They walked on together like this, Hermione and Blaise a few steps behind.
"Are you alright," he finally broke the silence, looking at her still slightly watery eyes in concern.
"Yeah, I just had a disagreement with Ron...can I ask you something," she stopped and looked at him, "do my clothes look awful to you."
"Awful? God no," he flushed slightly before continuing in a sincere manner, "you look amazing."
"Ron freaked," she started walking again.
"He would. I'm not trying to be nasty or anything, but well, he's lived in the wizarding world all his life, a place where a short sleeve robe would be considered scandalous for God's sake, and muggle clothes are somewhat shocking at first." She looked curious, so he elaborated, "Draco took us to the muggle world last summer. We always spend the summers together and one day we snuck away. He said we should have some idea of how the other world lives. It was amazing. The colours, the sounds, the diversity. Did you know they don't even apparate, they have all these others things, automobiles or something and it takes them hours to get anywhere and...," he flushed slightly, realisation suddenly hitting, "of course you know. Sorry."
They walked on in silence, watching Pansy and Seamus talking enthusiastically between small outbreaks of play fighting.
Finally Hermione spoke, "Draco...he isn't anything like we imagine isn't he."
"He's amazing," Blaise's eyes glowed with enthusiasm. "But yes, in someways he's exactly like you imagine. He is his father's son, he is spoilt, arrogant, prejudiced, opinionated, conceited and a thousand other unpleasant adjectives you could name. But he's also loyal, friendly, funny, intelligent, caring. We live in a different world, about as different as muggles and wizards. Our parents are despised and we by association. People outside of Slytherin expected Draco to be horrible, to be everything you think he is and it's how he managed to survive. But inside Slytherin we are all in the same boat. Or at least we are. I'm not saying that there aren't some Slytherins who support Voldemort, but that's the same in every house, even Gryffindor. Is this making any sense?"
"I think so."
"It's just, well, asking what Draco is like is like asking..."
"Like asking what the ozone layer smells of?"
"What?"
"Surrounding the atmosphere is something called the ozone layer. It filters the sun's rays, stops it damaging us. Apparently it smells of geraniums but, logically, you would never find out because you can not breathe up there, there is not enough oxygen. So you go up, lift the helmet of your space suit up, take a breath and die."
"You're comparing my best friend to poisonous gas?"
"Well if the cap fits," Hermione laughed.
"You're scarily smart, sometimes just plain scary, but I understand what you mean, which is kind of scary too," he smiled at her.
"Well thank you kind sir," she curtseyed, causing him to shake his head in confusion, but still smiling.
Up ahead, hearing Hermione laugh, Seamus muttered, "that's a good sound."
"She isn't happy." It wasn't a question.
"She had another fight with Ron."
"Oh."
"Yeah. He's an idiot sometimes, he can't see what he's got."
"You like her?" Pansy was amazed, unflattering as it sounded towards her friend, but Hermione seamed too serious a girl for Seamus Finnegan to fall for.
"You don't like Hermione, you worship her," he liked that he could be serious around this girl, that he wasn't who he always was, but then again that was the point and the problem, wasn't it. "Oh, I don't mean I love her or fancy her. It's more than that. It's like...you've probably never seen her with Harry, have you? Well she sort of mothers him, but more than that. She's kind of the central pivot for him, if Hermione says something is OK then you do it. He trusts her completely, worships her, lets her protect him, yet he watches her like he's protecting her. Ron won't even think of fighting with her if Harry's around. It's hard to explain, but she's more than just his best friend, she's like his sister, his missing other half." He shook his head slightly, the Gryffindor dynamic was not something you explained, any more than you could explain how computer's or telly's worked. Trying just made your head hurt. "How did we get onto this serious conversation anyway?"
"It just crept up on us," Pansy smiled and they both let the conversation drift onto lighter things until the fence surrounding Hogsmeade came into view and all four halted.
"Finally," Seamus puffed, "that was a long walk Becky, still say we could have just gone in the carriages like normal people."
"But you're not normal Seamus, nor will you ever be. And if we'd gone with everyone else they would have seen is walk all the way round Hogsmeade and up here. The carriages drop us at the wrong end of town."
"So where now?"
"Over there," she pointed to a cave that seemed to appear from nowhere. "Dumbledore hid it for us. You only see it when it's pointed out to you."
She took a deep breath and led the way into the cave, which was lit with torches. In the centre of the cave sat Sirius Black, a concerned look on his face. When he saw Hermione he leapt up and hugged her before enquiring in a concerned voice, "is Harry all right? What's going on?"
"Harry is fine Sirius," Hermione soothed. "This is about him though, we need to talk to you."
"Sit down, make your self at home," he smiled as she conjured up five armchairs before his gaze fell on the others, realsing they were strangers. "Who are your friends?" he enquired in a dangerously tight voice.
"You remember Seamus Finnegan, and these are Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zabini," she introduced them, startling the two Slytherins out of their contemplation of the man whose name was a fearsome legend in the wizarding world.
He was nothing like they had imagined, yet they had seen pictures of him, not least of all in their Draco-imposed research into the past. He was thinner and had a more haunted look, the smiling, half smug look was gone and the eyes were more closed. But the way he held himself was the most telling thing. Gone was the relaxed, slouching posture of a man who was confident and at ease and it was replaced with a gait they were all to familiar with, living with father's who were always expecting the knife in the back, the knock of the door which would signal a ministry investigation. Sirius Black was ready for a fight, ready to kill. It was a frightening prospect.
"Hi," the man began to smile but his expression closed off again, "Zabini and Parkinson? What the fuck is this Hermione? Have you changed sides or is there another reason you show Death Eaters where I am."
"Sirius, let me explain."
"I though you were the intelligent one of the bunch Hermione," he ignored her, getting worked up. "Guess I was wrong. You're befriending Slytherin's now? Just brilliant. You will be considerate enough to give Harry a head's up won't you? L:et him see the knife before you stab him in the back with it? God, I would never have picked you for it. Well, what do you want with me?"
"If you'd let me explain..."
"No, I don't think I will," he stood up. "Just be glad I don't have my wand on me," he glared and began to walk away."
"Well I have mine," she was in front of him before he knew what had happened, wand pointed in his face. "Sit down."
He did and she put the wand down.
"These are my friends, and Harry knows all about it."
"And I suppose he's just thrilled with it."
"No, actually he doesn't really understand."
"Oh course, and we just didn't understand Peter."
"Don't you dare even think about comparing me to that piece of shit, you arrogant, conceited, hypocritical bastard. You're not exactly Mr. Perfect are you? But you are Harry's Godfather and I was stupid enough to think that you might be able to shelve your ill-conceived prejudices long enough to help us help him."
"Harry needs help?" Sirius asked in vain as Hermione continued, too angry to hear him.
"I mean I knew that you wouldn't be thrilled to see Slytherins here but I told them that you would listen, if just for Harry's sake. I'm meant to be smart, god any idiot could have seen that wouldn't happen, you're too selfish for than. Snape is easier to talk to than you, for God's sake, but I never dreamt you could think that...that... and what about Harry? If he knew that you couldn't listen to me, wouldn't try just because you wouldn't let this stupid, meaningless grudge against Slytherins go. He thinks the sun shines out of you...you...you..." she finally ran out of steam, tears running down her face.
"What about Harry," Sirius began, only to receive a dirty look from all three as Blaise, being the nearest, was dealing with a sobbing Hermione.
"Sirius, I suggest you shut the fuck up," Seamus frowned, but Pansy came closer to Sirius.
"We've heard a lot of stories about you. We grew up knowing about the way you supposedly betrayed the Potters, we lived through your actions when you escaped from Azkaban. You were a legend, a scary story, something not quite human. Then Hermione told us that you hadn't betrayed Harry's parents. She also told us how you tried to kill Professor Snape. That you could be innocent of one betrayal but guilty of another. It didn't make you less scary, rather more so. I didn't want to come, it was obvious we wouldn't be welcome, but she insisted. She convinced us to forget about your past, to ignore your name and come and see who you really are. I'm only 17 and if I can do that, to confront a childhood ghoul and see the truth, surely an adult like yourself could try to do the same."
The other four looked at her in amazement as she stood there, holding her hand out to Sirius, looking him directly in the eyes.
Slowly he raised his hand and shook hers.
"If nothing else, you've got guts girl," he said finally and a now composed Hermione smiled at him.
"Thank you Sirius."
"I'm sorry about what I said," he offered grudgingly, "I should never have compared you to Peter."
"No, you shouldn't have."
"Maybe you could tell me why you wanted to see me," Sirius finally spoke again as everyone settled into their chairs.
Seamus told him what had happened to Harry and Draco all those weeks ago, sketching the events and discoveries of the two days, telling him what they had observed watching Harry and Draco together.
"I would have killed to see that," he muttered when the narrative was over. Louder he continued, "I should have guessed Lily would have had her own way, but something like that? She must have been very determined to hang onto Narcissa. We all knew she hated the way everyone was falling apart, retreating into their houses. She insisted that the war would never be won that way, had a stand up fight with Dumbledore if I remember correctly, something about them coming for me and there being no one left to speak up. Very bizarre." He shook his head and Hermione smiled, the only one who got the reference. "What did you want from me?"
"Well, I thought you should know, for a start. We weren't sure if Remus had said anything to you and, well, you're practically family to Harry. And secondly, we wondered if you had any idea what the spell could have been -"
"Or if you could just tell us what to do. That would be really nice," Pansy added.
"Bloody hell, you don't want much," he grinned, showing the two Slytherins the side of him that Harry and his friends saw.
"Not right now," Seamus reassured him, glad to see the man smiling and more like his old self.
"Well that something. But I don't think I'll be of much help, Lily didn't really confide in me much."
'Not much of a surprise there,' thought Blaise, who was amazed to hear Hermione voice a similar opinion.
"No, Remus said something to that affect."
"Which brings me, somewhat tenuously, to ask what you meant about being able to talk to Snape."
"Well, and I am not trying to start another fight, it seems a bit much that you can arbitrarily hate all Slytherins when your best friend is making his life with one."
"Remus has bad judgement sometimes," Sirius replied carefully.
"I don't think so," Hermione began but Seamus jumped in.
"She thinks they are sweet," he pulled a disgusted face which relieved the building tension, making Hermione and Sirius laugh.
"Well they are," she protested, smiling, "you should have been there Sirius. Draco made Snape blush! And Remus was practically glowing."
"Yes, he always did look at Snape like he was the centre of everything."
"And then some," Hermione smiled dreamily.
"Careful, she's making a storybook romance out of it," laughed Pansy.
"Listen Missy, just because your my friend doesn't mean I won't be tempted to tell Blaise about a certain...liaison you had with-" Hermione was cut of by Pansy, who launched herself on top of the other girl, launching a tickling war.
Sirius watched as the two boys just rolled their eyes and made faux-bets, cheering on the girl who wasn't in their own house. It was, he realised, the first time he had seen Hermione Granger let herself go and enjoy herself, act like the child she so nearly wasn't anymore. And he couldn't help wondering how much of it was because she was with people who didn't have any expectations of her. Was this, he wondered, what had drawn Lily to Narcissa (and people generally outside of her house), what had drawn Remus so totally to Snape. Was this why she was so eager to explore the bond that had existed between Harry and Draco?
It was thought provoking, but he was not quite ready to embrace the idea. If he was forced to...but not until then.
Finally they realised the time and things were wrapped up quickly, they were out the 'door' before he knew it and he had to chase after Hermione.
"You're slightly scary, Hermione Granger, but you are quite the girl. Harry is lucky to have you."
"Thanks Sirius," she hugged him impulsively, "I know you don't like it, but...thanks. And you're the second person to call me scary. Should I be worried?"
"No, I think you're fairly perfect the way you are," he smiled at her, feeling a tenderness towards he that he had only related to Harry before. It was nice to have someone who saw his faults - and saw them rather too well for his liking - and still liked him.
***
Half an hour later and the four seventh years were sitting in the Hogs Head, Blaise's suggestion for the two Gryffindors would never have dreamt of going in there.
"You know," Hermione said as she looked around her, "the muggles have a chain of pubs called the Hogs Head too. Not like this though. It's cozy, pool tables and comfy chairs. Pricey though."
The waitress appeared with their drinks, the wizarding equivalent of vodka and coke, Seamus had assured Hermione when he ordered them.
"To Hermione," he toasted, "one hell of a scary girl."
"To Hermione," the other two raised their glasses and all four took a drink.
"Bloody hell," the girl in question gasped as the drink went down, "that's not any vodka I know. And that's the third time I've been called scary."
"Oh don't let it get to you my Becky," Seamus hugged her, "you're sweet as hell too."
"Oh shucks," she laughed, taking another sip of the drink. "This is growing on me," she decided.
***
They finally left the pub and hour later, realising that they would be missed soon. Meandering back towards Hogwarts – the only possible way of travelling when you were rather tipsy – Hermione insisted they waited while she ran into the bookshop, dragging Seamus with her.
Blaise and Pansy had been waiting outside for about ten minutes when the door opened and Lavender Brown and Jess Clare walked out, laughing about something. They stopped when they saw the two Slytherins, who visibly braced themselves for attack.
To their utter surprise the two girls came up to them, smiling nervously.
"Um, hi," Lavender began, looking as if she half expected to be knocked back, "just thought you might like to know that they might be some time. 'Mione is using poor old Seamus as a bookcase. He doesn't look happy."
"Ok, thanks for telling us," Pansy finally replied, expecting the two girls to leave. Instead Lavender continued speaking, more confidently now.
"I just wanted to say, whatever you said to Hermione, or what ever you did today, it worked. She looks a lot happier. So thanks."
"We didn't do anything," Blaise began, but was cut off by Pansy.
"Look this is stupid, lets start again. I'm Pansy and this is Blaise, nice to meet you."
Giggling Lavender shook the preoffered hand, "And I'm Lavender and this is Jess. We're Gryffindor's but we're not all dicks like Ron."
"That's nice to know."
"Anyway. We better be off, only two Hogsmeade visits left before Christmas and I've barely started," Lavender continued, the bags at her feet causing the two Slytherins to look sceptical.
"Remember that look and pity me – I'm the designated helped. Come on Lavender," Jess rolled her eyes and the two left, leaving two stunned Slytherins behind them.
"Well that was…"
"…indeed."
***
Walking home, they mentioned the conversation to the two Gryffindors, causing a beaming smile to spread over Hermione's face.
"What I don't get," Pansy continued, "is why they suddenly about faced if you didn't say anything in the shop."
"Ah, that's our little Becky's fault I'm afraid," Seamus grinned, pulling her into a one armed hug. "Where she leads, we all follow."
"Shut up Seamus, this isn't funny," she pouted. "Ignore him."
"Now we can't," Blaise teased her
"Well listen closely and I'll take you into the wonderful world of Gryffindor," Seamus announced in his best 'hammer horror' voice. "You see, gentle viewer, it is Hermione who is the Gryffindor leader, it really is a case of where she goes, we follow."
They were laughing at the idea until they saw how red Hermione had gone.
"But what about Potter?"
"Harry defers to Hermione, we defer to him, hence Queen Hermione. She's a female Draco Malfoy."
"God, that's a scary thought," Pansy mock shuddered as they entered the castle.
"I am not scary," Hermione pouted. "I refuse to be."
"Well, that obviously settles it then," Pansy smirked sarcastically.
"Well if I am scary then be afraid, be very afraid, cus' I'm going to get you," Hermione shouted back as they separated to go to their separate common rooms.
"Me too?" Seamus whimpered, offering up the password waiting as the portrait opened.
Laughing, they stepped through the portrait hole and everything went downhill.
***
"Have a good time," Ron was sitting there, glaring at them.
"Yes, thanks," Seamus tried to sound casual but Ron ignored him.
"Not you."
"Yes Ron, I did."
"I expected you back hours ago," he commented in a strangely even voice, "people saw you coming out of the Hogs Head. The Hogs Head. And you were all over that Death Eater in training."
"Ron…"
"NO! I've had it. I've been understanding with this, this fad, but this is enough Hermione," his voice was reaching a crescendo and he shouted the last words at a shell shocked Hermione. "You're my girlfriend and I forbid you to see them again."
END CHAPTER EIGHTEENWell, that's that then. What did you think?
It's rather long but I told myself, 'self' I said 'you've got to get to this point.' So I did.
Well done me!
P.S. Apologies for the Hermione leader bit – got lost – may rewrite later!
Review responses:
death-resurrected: two words – chapter twenty! I'm not promising a rose garden but maybe a little sunshine.
Slice: aw what wrong? Hope you cheer up duck. J
Alex Destine: thanks. Glad you have faith in me. Very helpful review – love those!
Scorn-Silverstar: I will continue Deal – I just got away from myself with it – carried away with the reviews I'm afraid. Need to regroup!
Charmedz: yeah, I'm never sure how AU it is before its really AU. V confusing! I like your little Harry/Draco scenario and hope you'll like what I've got planned – and most of this fic has been centred around the big scene so fingers crossed!
kendra1117: yeah I thought Blaise/Seamus but Deal does that and – if I ever get off my arse and continue it – then I don't want all my fics too samesy and I'm already going that way with H/D and Sev/Remus so…oh well, I think I know what I'm gonna do.
Ice Lupus: Bloody hell when you review you really review. Love you girl! I won't say any more except big thanks and big hugs – very helpful and encouraging. So I only RSVP'd a little J
Amirathis: *blushes crimson* thanks darling!
GoldenSunnyGrl: yup I like fandom Pansy – actually came to like her through Pansy/Ron fics (i.e. wonderful Beneath You) cus she was quite strong in them. Glad you like the story.
wintermoon2: wow darling, that was a review and a half – love you! Can't say too much here but THANKS SO MUCH for the encouragement and all! Must confess I stole the 'pronglet' thing from somewhere – can't remember where though. I'm bad to the bone!
Also thanks to Paws, Elle, Miss Lesley, Hyakuhei, Dreamer, Honor, Sapphire Raine and Jes Imagin
See you all soon,
Louise