Lasciste Esso Bruciarsi

By: X8DramaQueen8X

Rated: PG-13

Summary: Based on Usher's Burn. Legolas leaves the love of his life before he leaves for the Fellowship's journey, but what will he do once he realizes he made a huge mistake?

Chapter 4- I'm Trying to Say 'I Love You'

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Disclaimer: I don't own any of Tolkien's characters. I never did. I never will. I don't own Usher's song "Burn" or Usher. I never did. I never will.

GOD DAMN IT!

Oh yeah, please don't flame me. Just review.

And I had to change a few lyrics to make it not sound creepy, so don't get on my case about that, okay?

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A/N:

Me- ::walks over to the computer, wrapped in her bed sheet:: Before any of you ask, yes, I am perverted, yes, I am obsessed with Legolas and Orlando, and no, I won't give him back.

Legolas- ::walking over from her room, wrapped in a blanket, laying his chin in the nape of her neck:: I don't want to be given back.

Me- ::whimpers, feeling his golden hair brush her shoulder, seeing that he's only covered from his waist to above his knees::

Legolas- What, meleth?

Me- ::whining:: Oh, you know you're making me weak.

Legolas- Isn't that the point? ::makes to kiss her neck::

Me- Shh… the story's supposed to be angsty, you're not supposed to be so damn horn-

Legolas- ::covers her mouth with his hand and looks up, smiling sheepishly:: Okay, well, how about the rest of you finish reading while we…

Me- ::muffled under his hand:: YES!!

Legolas- ::smiles, grabs her hand, and drags her off::

Albert & Kathy (Meg's Parents)- ::just getting home from their weekend in Rhode Island:: Meg? We're home! Where are you?

Me- DDAAAMMMMNNNNN IIIIIIITTTTTTT!

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Idril boarded the ship, tears of sorrow on the verge of falling from her eyes. Legolas dismounted his horse and whispered Elvish words to the animal that made the stallion turn around and run for home.

"Wait-" he yelled at a brunette elf on the pier who was releasing the rope from the dock to let the boat float away. "Don't!" Legolas raced onto the boat and grabbed the shoulders of the blonde elleth by the stern.

"Legolas," Idril said quietly.

Legolas buried his face in her golden wheat hair. "Idril, I know that you are married now, I know you have a family, but I cannot hold in my feelings a moment longer, and if I do, it will kill me."

"Legolas, don't-" she begged.

"Don't- don't stop me, Idril. Please don't stop me," he interrupted, growling with yearning, staring directly in her gorgeous sapphire eyes. "I need to say this."

She shivered with longing. She knew that he was the last piece of the puzzle of her life. He was all she needed. He was all she wanted. But he had hurt her too much once already. She knew that he would do it to her again.

He captured her in his arms and whispered against her lips. "Idril, all those years ago, when I said I didn't love you- I was lying to you and myself, for the truth is that you are all that I ever needed, that I ever will need."

She could not bear to say what she had to. ['But you've hurt me before. You'd do it to me again. What makes you believe that just apologizing for what you did to me all those years ago will simply make everything all right again?']

"Please, please forgive me, Idril. I've spent all this time wishing that I hadn't done what I've done. I've been burning all these years, knowing the pain that I have forced you to endure."

Idril wasn't sure if he was enraging her or upsetting her. "Legolas, it's far too late now. I'm married. I have two children. And you have no idea how much you hurt me those years ago. I spent all that time, from the garden until now, thinking what I had done to make you not love me anymore. What you have said is not enough of a poultice to heal those forgotten wounds, my friend."

"Will something else heal it?" he asked, more of a plea.

"Will what heal it?" she said, her eyes glassy with unshed tears.

"This, I pray," he murmured, slanting his mouth across hers fiercely, as she had always hungered for him to kiss her. "Please," he implored after she halted the cadence of their contact. "I need you beside me, whether it be for only tomorrow or as long as I breathe."

"What made you change your mind?" she panted.

"I'd changed my mind a long time ago. I realized I made the biggest mistake of my life- leaving you. It was not because I wanted to leave you. I was selfish. I figured that if you were not on my mind whilst I was on the journey, I could be more capable of completing the task at hand, but it did the exact opposite. It hindered me. And if I had remained attached to you, you would have died of a broken heart, for I knew I would die in battle. All I did was create lies for myself so you could not haunt my every thought and be my every memory. But I knew that I- I couldn't and I can't bear to live without you, Idril."

"Your majesty, are you remaining on the ship? We cannot delay much longer," said the brunette elf.

"Just give me another minute," pleaded Legolas deperately.

"Legolas-" Idril begged. "Do not do this to me any longer. I cannot bear this torment another moment." And don't kiss me again, she thought. Please do not kiss me again, for then I will not be capable of resisting.

"Idril, you comprehend not how much I've maltreated myself, as well as I have you, by telling the falsehood that I did not love you. I need you."

"I cannot give you what you need, Legolas. You must seek someone else. I refuse to have you by my side only to tell me lies again," she whispered against his mouth as he leaned down to kiss her again.

"Do you love him?"

"He knows that I don't love him. I never loved him. My heart had already been captured by another," she admitted, looking down at the boards of the deck.

"You tried to fade because of me, did you not?" he questioned, tilting her head up to gaze into her eyes. She nodded solemnly. "Why?" he inquired.

"I saw no reason to live after you said it was simply a dream, and I no longer wished to live my life without you."

"I can identify with your pain. I see no reason to live after you asked me not to do this to you any longer, and I no longer wish to live my life without you."

"Just stop it, Legolas," she snapped, pulling away from him. "Leave me alone. I'm sailing for Valinor without you." It burst out of her. "You've hurt me before, and you'd do it again. What makes you believe that simply a sudden apology will suddenly take away everything I've endured because of you?"

"Idril-" he began.

She slapped him across his cheek and he clutched it in shock and pain. "Don't you dare stop me, Legolas! Don't you dare!"

"Idril-" he put a hand where her neck met her shoulder after a quiet instant.

"Damn it, Legolas, get away from me! Because if you touch me again," she said, now softening, "if you touch me again, I'll fall back in love with you."

"Idril, meleth," he said. "I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."

He felt her palm graze his chin and froze when it landed on his mouth.

"Legolas, just be quiet and kiss me," she giggled, smiling.

His normally stern face lightened, his eyes laughed, and he leaned down to seize her mouth for his own.

Then thought dawned upon her. "Wait."

He pulled back, confused.

"Set sail," she said lightly to the brunette on the pier who released the rope off the dock.

Legolas smiled and took Idril in his arms, and kissed her fervently as they disappeared into the sunset, sailing to the jeweled shores of Valinor where they would live together in happiness until the end of eternity.