OFFICE OF DR. B. F. PIERCE, CRABAPPLE COVE, MAINE: SEPTEMBER 15, 1953.
"You, you what" asked Hawkeye anxiously.
Margaret sighed "I'm pregnant".
Hawk's face lit up, they hugged. "Are you sure? Have you seen your doctor" he asked.
"Yes" said Margaret, "I went and saw your dad this morning, and he confirmed it" she giggled "and you are my doctor silly".They kissed.
Hawkeye had to think about this for a few seconds. He was home, he was back in civilian life, now he's just gotten the news that he was going to be a father. To top it all off, he had the greatest gal in the world as his wife.
He was very, very happy. A warm feeling of joy embraced Hawkeye Pierce, certifiably the luckiest man in the world.
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O'REILLY FARM, OTTUMWA, IOWA: SEPTEMBER 16, 1953.
Radar and Patti sat on the porch. A sweet country breeze wafted thorough the air.
"Do you think it's the right time to get married?" asked Patti very bluntly. Radar stared at her, the breeze delicately flowed thorough her hair and the sun reflected of her face just right.
Radar sighed "yes, I do" he said.
It was amazing thought Radar; he never saw himself as the type to get married or have kids, he was a little blown away. Life was changing for the better for the gang that was the 4077th.
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WINCHESTER RETREAT, CAPE COD, MASS: SEPTEMBER 17, 1953.
The entire social population on middle Massachusetts, including (the then) Senator John F. Kennedy and his wife Jackie, captains of industry and wealthy socialites had gathered at the Winchester compound on Cape Cod for the weeding.
The courtyard of the main house was decorated with blue and pink, tables of lavish and decant foods. A pile of gifts twenty feet high stood nearby as the congregation looked on at the altar.
"Charles" asked the minister "do you take Edna to be your wife."
Charles looked at her, the minister and then his parents, sitting with Senator Kennedy and his goons.
"I do" he said.
The minister looked at Edna "do you take Charles to be your husband?"
Without hesitation she shot out "I do"
They were pronounced husband and wife, and as they kissed everyone cheered and clapped.
Whatever feelings of nervousness he had, it was gone. As was his freedom and will to live, nah, just kidding.
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MCINTYRE HOME, BOSTON, MASS: SEPTEMBER 27, 1953.
John and Louise McIntyre were sitting on the sofa, watching TV. The two children were in bed and Louise was expecting another soon.
A light rain fell outside as the two McIntyre's snuggled in front of the tube. The phone rang.
"Trapper?" asked a familiar voice "is that you"
He sat up "Hey Hawk, it's great to hear from you!"
"Do you have any plans for Christmas" Hawkeye asked.
"Christmas plans" Trap said ………. He thought about Louise's mother coming again ……….and her big smoochy kisses and bad smelling makeup.
"No, we are completely free at Christmas, how are the two of you doing?"
Louise frowned at him, he glared at her.
"and………..baby makes three" exclaimed Hawkeye
Trapper's jaw dropped to the floor "you mean, Margaret is pregnant? Wow, that's terrific" he said.
Louise looked at him in surprise "yessirreee, Hawk's havin' a kid to ol' Hotlips,, things are happening too fast!" he told her.
For the next while, Hawkeye and Trapper talked about the war, their home life and general things.
They both agreed that it was the best feeling in the world to be "back in the world" as their faithful yet oh so bumbling leader Henry had put it.
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CHEZ KLINGER, TOLEDO, OHIO: OCTOBER 25, 1953.
Chez Klinger was all but complete, a crane was lowering the "Chez Klinger" sign into position. Klinger (still in his army foreman helmet) was directing it a little to the left.
"Easy, easy, perfect!" he said, the sign was secured in place.
"Well………" asked Paul Connor "what now?"
Klinger smiled and looked over at his business manager, he gave the "thumbs up"
"Done' said Klinger "all we do is light up the sign and come back at eight for the grand opening, I've gotten every newspaper in town filled with ads, and that crooked old drunk of a printer did a great job with those flyers"
He smiled; everything was failing to place just perfectly, he was home, had a great wife and what was hopefully to become a great business.
It's a good thing he didn't reenlist in the army after all.
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PIERCE HOME, CRABAPPLE COVE, MAINE: CHRISTMAS, 1953
The snow was falling around B. J., Peg and Erin as they walked toward the house. It was Christmas and everyone had converged on the Pierce home.
B. J. could see the Christmas tree in the window, smoke wafted from the chimney and there was as magical feel in the air.
Hawkeye stood in the door – "Come in" he said.
As BJ and his family entered the foyer, they could see all of the 4077th, The former Col. and Mrs. Potter, Radar and Patti, Trapper and family, Margaret, Klinger with Soon-Lee and Father Mulchay had arrived.
Everyone looked at the 10ft. tree in the den, lights and decorations all around. The fire was stoked and the house was warm, Margaret and the women were in the kitchen, preparing dinner.
"So?" asked Trapper, "when you n' Hotlips comin' to Boston? We should get together"
"Well" said Hawkeye "Margaret and me should come down after New Years and we could go play golf or and see Chuckles and co."
Charles shot a look at them.
"Yeah Chuckles" said BJ "I'm sure the three of you would get along just great"
Edna looked at Charles, who looked at BJ, who looked at Charles.
As everyone ate dinner, they all talked and laughed. It was the first Christmas with real food and booze that wasn't brewed in week old sweat socks.
"Margaret, that meal was delicious" said Sherm undoing his belt and taking a slug of hootch.
"Thank you" she said, starting to clear the plates.
Mildred and Louise got up "you have to stop doing everything yourself" said Mildred "especially in that condition of yours, let us help you, sit, ……go on, sit!"
Margaret sat down as Mildred and Louise cleared the dishes.
"Did you have a good Christmas, was Santa Claus good to you?" BJ asked Erin, who was sitting in her highchair with food splotched all over her face.
BJ got a napkin and wiped it off, "Daddy" said Erin "you missed some"
"It looks like Frank has been operating again!" joked Trapper, "does anyone know what happened to Frank after his brief appearance at the wedding?"
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FLOWING MEADOWS NEUROLOGICAL CARE FACILITY AND GOLF RESORT, FORT WAYNE, IND.
Upon leaving the wedding, Frank was assessed by a military physiatrist at the Army Neurological Testing Center, Ft. Deedrick, Maryland , who found him to be "……wholly devoid of any neurological functions not benefiting or sustaining an impossible illusion that subject is married to one Margaret Pierce"
It was the Army's recommendation that "the subject, having been rendered incapable of focusing on any subject not befitting to his delusion is therefore unfit for continued service in the army reserve, therefore the subject shall be confined to a suitable VA approved facility to handle and if possible treat the subjects extreme delusions and (from time to time) actions befitting of same"
So……..as the nut jobs sat in ten foot rubber rooms and the golfers tried to shoot ten under par, ol' Ferret Face went certifiably nuts and now spends his days in a 10x10 room lined with rubber walls in some sort of dream state thinking he's married to Hotlips.