Disclaimer: You know the drill. You sue, I have no money, it will be pointless.

Aisling A/n: The idea for this came into my head one day thanks to the inhabitants Harry's. I give you credit!

This is maybe one of the most surreal things I've written. It's just… weird. Thus you have been warned: Read with an ample sense of humor.

I in my perfect turquoise suit was sitting UNATTENDED on a bench in the middle of a cloud, WITHOUT my Signature Cuban Cigar and my Brandy And Soda. They were making me wait. They still are. It makes me very angry. I don't like having to wait! The man that was waiting on me said that they don't have any brandy here! I can't believe it. He said he was a fisherman anyway. Humph. What would he know?

What do you mean, what am I here for? They won't tell me! Of course I don't know. Do you know?

Afterlife? Very funny. No, it must be prison.

Car accident? Did you cause it, if you're here?

I don't know why they're keeping me here. Don't they know who I am?

No?

Well they will all right. I'll make sure they know. I didn't do anything. They have no right to keep me here. It was all that damned building.

Did I run my car into it? No. Why would I do that? It wouldn't let me if I tried. Damn thing's alive.

No, I'm not crazy. Why do you ask? Anything can happen to anything or anybody; it just happened to happen to me.

Did I not make myself clear? Don't you have ears and a brain?

I meant Factory was alive. I meant it possessed me. Is that concept just to complicated for you?

I see.

Oh.

How did it happen? Well, I don't know.

It all started when I was appointed to the post of Administrator in the STN-J. I was 36 then, before my wife divorced me.

The STN-J? We hunt Witches. You know, the foul creatures that pollute the pure water that is humanity.

Very funny.

The position of Administrator pays well. My wife, daughter, and I moved into a good-sized, upscale apartment. We lived a sort of idealistic life.

And then I began to feel The Call. My expensive car began to be pulled in a sort of northwesterly direction when I drove it. I thought there must be something wrong with the steering, but nothing could be found.
I traded it in anyways.

And the same thing happened.

I traded that one in and got a truck.

The same thing happened.

I got a convertible.

The same thing happened.
Economy car, luxury car, limo, monster truck… same thing.

One day, I decided to just let my car (a sedan now) go where it wanted. I simply steered it around corners and out of the path of other cars and large objects.

It took me far out of the city and eventually into a huge wood. Farther and farther it went, heading down an overgrown dirt road. It was very early autumn, and the leaves were beginning to change. I remember it was beautiful. It was one of the last times I ever noticed anything like that.

I didn't need to. What does it matter?

Then I came to a weedy clearing. Sitting in the middle was the shell of a building, gutted by fire.

It called to me.

Little did I know, it would become my life, the pinnacle of my career: Factory.

Ais A/n: Bad, I know. And kind of short. But I want to see how people react first.

The idea, besides coming from Harry's, originally came from a fic writer who had serious grammar trouble. She made it sound like Factory just… randomly picked itself up and rebuilt itself, I don't know.

BTW, do ya think I get the First Non-yaoi Zaizen Fic Award?

Slainte,

Ais