Prez Rufus: You may wonder, why in the bloody hell are we doing a commercial for materia?
*you see pictures of mako plants and then materia forming in natural places*
Prez Rufus: Its because here, at Shin-Ra inc., we want to suck all of your energy. Making materia isnt the only thing..we just want to destroy the world! hahaha. When we get our hands on the huge materia, you will all die!! *cackles evily*
*Rufus's face grows pale* "..........is that thing on?......The camera is on isnt it?" *the man behind it nods* "dammit!!!! I told you I was just goofing off, you moron!"
*Rufus gets up, and then you see his white trench coat infront of the camera, and then you hear him punching the camera dude. The camera then falls to the ground, you see Rufus's chair and desk whooshing sideways as it does. Then, You see those white static flakes on the screen.*
**********************************************************
Biggs: Eh, I hate live commercials. *sighs*
Wedge: ...........Anyway, we are proud to announce this next match. We are going to use some chicks this time.
Biggs: Thats right, Wedge. But, the rules are different for the chicks. For one...The ring will be covered in *dun dun dun!* MUD!
*Tons of mud are dumped into the arena ring, dudes whistling and cheering, waiting to see it.*
Wedge: AND, The chicks are...*du du du du dun!!!!!* IN BIKINIS! The rule is to try to get the bikinis off. First who does is the winner. The loser is horable degraded by men whistling at them, wanting them to come to their house and make sweet sweet love to them after the show. Come to think of it....--
Biggs: That's enough, Wedge. *he scowls, and Wedge giggles*
Wedge: So anyway, may I present, High Summoner Yuna! *monster truck commercial echo*
"Yuna steps into the mud, wearing a light blue bikini top, with Tidus's emblem between the cleavage. Her bikini panties are light blue faded to white, and they have a half-skirt going down the left side, similar to her Gunner dressphere. She had many bracelets and anklets, and she has a necklace that is similar to Tidus's.*
Wedge: Woah, she looks hot tonight, eh? Biggs?
*Biggs is too busy attempting to teach Joe the moogle a game of Peeknuckle, which is impossible.*
Wedge: Fine. Looks like ol' Sephy, in return for letting him compete, has gotten Aerith out of her water grave, and revived her. She too, will be competing tonight. Her first match will be with sexy Yuna, there. Come out, young Cetra!
*Aerith steps into the mess of mud and poses, letting everyone see that it is in fact, her. She is wearing a soft pink bikini and is wearing her usual black yarn choker. She also has on her bracelets.*
Biggs: *in background* okay... 1, 2, 3..P- knuck-kle. use your stubb! But you don't have a thumb! grr...
Wedge: I believe that Biggs has finally gone insane. Joe! Get your stuffed ass out there and be the damn ref.!
*the cute moogle, startled, races into the mud, blowing his whistle quickly. He was determined to beat Biggs. he runs back into the announcer booth, continuing his lessons.*
ROUND 3: Yuna VS Aerith
Yuna runs toward Aerith, flinging mud everywhere with each step* Aerith reaches her arms out, similar to a hug, and grabs her, pulling on her bra strap. Yuna does the same, suddenly flinging Aerith down into the muddy abyss, getting on top of her and pulling the front of her top.
Wedge: *Turned on* This show gets better every year!
*The two chicks roll around, trying to get at each others bra strap. Aerith gets a hold of Yuna's strap, and pulls hard...*
*all the men in the audience become wide eyed, drool filled their rows*
*Nothing happened. Yuna's strap was done-on good. Either that, or krazy-glued.*
Wedge: *entranced* Huh? oh..my turn to talk..oh yeah.. *grabs mic* *bumps it around* eek..sorry folks, anyway, it looks like Aerith aint gona get that strap off............OOOOHH! That had to hurt!
*Yuna had leaped upwards, kicking Aerith right in the jaw with her foot. *
Biggs: *still mindlessly playing peeknuckle*
*Aerith rolls around in the mud, holding her jaw. It hurt soo bad!*
"Take this you skank!" Aerith screeches, and tackles Yuna. *in seductive position* *all the guys are staring, drooling.*
"Bitch!" Yuna screams, as they enguage in a wallowing cat fight.*
Wedge wipes drool from his mouth* "..Oh, uhm..Right...Yuna looks like shes about to get that strap off!"
*Yuna gets on top of Aeris's back, fiddling with her strap..."
*Guys stare, wide eyed, they grab the pillow provided for them infront of their seat*
Biggs: No no Joe..Like THIS!
Wedge: Eureka! She has done it! She has become a raging bitch! *chuckles*
*Yuna had suceeded in pulling off Aeris's bikini top*
Aeris pushes Yuna off of her and covers her chest. She had not lost, but she was pissed.
Aeris growls and punches Yuna in the stomach, then tackling her and lying on her stomach*
*guys drool and shove the pillows on their crotches. the ones in the front get to see Aeris cleavage, which is covered in mud, while behind her they get to see some Aeris ass, which is also covered in mud. Ahh, the life.*
*Aerith pulls on the front of Yuna's bra, dripping mud all over her chest and neck.*
*Biggs and Joe are still busy with their mindless games...When suddenly..*
*Haha! Bitch! I got your bra!* *Oh my Yevon! Joe! You beat me!*
*The guys start to clap, happy that they get to see both chicks luscious boobies.
*Aerith then shoves Yuna off of her, and falls boob first into the mud, so maybe no one will see them.*
Kimahri: Kimahri want to see Yuna titties
Barret: AERIS! Show me 'dem boobies!!! &%$#!!! @!$%&*!!!!
Biggs: *Gets up* *Pats Joe the Moogle on the head* Good job. *Suddenly looks out of the booth and sees two chicks covered in so much mud its hard to tell who they are* .......Wedge...? What did I miss???
Wedge: Oh, nothing....Nothing at all...
Biggs: *shruggs* *continues watching the cat fight*
*Both chicks stop* Yuna: Oh! whats gotten into me? Im sorry, im so sorry! *pannicks* Aeris: *pissed* I kow you arent sorry, but lets call it a truce, i dont feel like getting covered in white goo as well as this mud. *giggles*
*guys start booing* MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE!!!!!
Biggs: Uh....Lets go to a commercial break, shall we?
Wedge: *wipes drool* oh, right...okay its a TIE!! *monster truck commercial echo*
Biggs: ---Holds up blank piece of papper, writing: *commercial time!!* *puts it infront of camera*
Wedge: Were gona try elimination matches next time. Anywho..*silent*
-------Right..bad ending...i kinda got bored with this match..next one wont suck so bad, promise. you know..straight girls dont write about chicks mud wrestling, do they? heh... i did cuz my freind begged me too...lol
*you see pictures of mako plants and then materia forming in natural places*
Prez Rufus: Its because here, at Shin-Ra inc., we want to suck all of your energy. Making materia isnt the only thing..we just want to destroy the world! hahaha. When we get our hands on the huge materia, you will all die!! *cackles evily*
*Rufus's face grows pale* "..........is that thing on?......The camera is on isnt it?" *the man behind it nods* "dammit!!!! I told you I was just goofing off, you moron!"
*Rufus gets up, and then you see his white trench coat infront of the camera, and then you hear him punching the camera dude. The camera then falls to the ground, you see Rufus's chair and desk whooshing sideways as it does. Then, You see those white static flakes on the screen.*
**********************************************************
Biggs: Eh, I hate live commercials. *sighs*
Wedge: ...........Anyway, we are proud to announce this next match. We are going to use some chicks this time.
Biggs: Thats right, Wedge. But, the rules are different for the chicks. For one...The ring will be covered in *dun dun dun!* MUD!
*Tons of mud are dumped into the arena ring, dudes whistling and cheering, waiting to see it.*
Wedge: AND, The chicks are...*du du du du dun!!!!!* IN BIKINIS! The rule is to try to get the bikinis off. First who does is the winner. The loser is horable degraded by men whistling at them, wanting them to come to their house and make sweet sweet love to them after the show. Come to think of it....--
Biggs: That's enough, Wedge. *he scowls, and Wedge giggles*
Wedge: So anyway, may I present, High Summoner Yuna! *monster truck commercial echo*
"Yuna steps into the mud, wearing a light blue bikini top, with Tidus's emblem between the cleavage. Her bikini panties are light blue faded to white, and they have a half-skirt going down the left side, similar to her Gunner dressphere. She had many bracelets and anklets, and she has a necklace that is similar to Tidus's.*
Wedge: Woah, she looks hot tonight, eh? Biggs?
*Biggs is too busy attempting to teach Joe the moogle a game of Peeknuckle, which is impossible.*
Wedge: Fine. Looks like ol' Sephy, in return for letting him compete, has gotten Aerith out of her water grave, and revived her. She too, will be competing tonight. Her first match will be with sexy Yuna, there. Come out, young Cetra!
*Aerith steps into the mess of mud and poses, letting everyone see that it is in fact, her. She is wearing a soft pink bikini and is wearing her usual black yarn choker. She also has on her bracelets.*
Biggs: *in background* okay... 1, 2, 3..P- knuck-kle. use your stubb! But you don't have a thumb! grr...
Wedge: I believe that Biggs has finally gone insane. Joe! Get your stuffed ass out there and be the damn ref.!
*the cute moogle, startled, races into the mud, blowing his whistle quickly. He was determined to beat Biggs. he runs back into the announcer booth, continuing his lessons.*
ROUND 3: Yuna VS Aerith
Yuna runs toward Aerith, flinging mud everywhere with each step* Aerith reaches her arms out, similar to a hug, and grabs her, pulling on her bra strap. Yuna does the same, suddenly flinging Aerith down into the muddy abyss, getting on top of her and pulling the front of her top.
Wedge: *Turned on* This show gets better every year!
*The two chicks roll around, trying to get at each others bra strap. Aerith gets a hold of Yuna's strap, and pulls hard...*
*all the men in the audience become wide eyed, drool filled their rows*
*Nothing happened. Yuna's strap was done-on good. Either that, or krazy-glued.*
Wedge: *entranced* Huh? oh..my turn to talk..oh yeah.. *grabs mic* *bumps it around* eek..sorry folks, anyway, it looks like Aerith aint gona get that strap off............OOOOHH! That had to hurt!
*Yuna had leaped upwards, kicking Aerith right in the jaw with her foot. *
Biggs: *still mindlessly playing peeknuckle*
*Aerith rolls around in the mud, holding her jaw. It hurt soo bad!*
"Take this you skank!" Aerith screeches, and tackles Yuna. *in seductive position* *all the guys are staring, drooling.*
"Bitch!" Yuna screams, as they enguage in a wallowing cat fight.*
Wedge wipes drool from his mouth* "..Oh, uhm..Right...Yuna looks like shes about to get that strap off!"
*Yuna gets on top of Aeris's back, fiddling with her strap..."
*Guys stare, wide eyed, they grab the pillow provided for them infront of their seat*
Biggs: No no Joe..Like THIS!
Wedge: Eureka! She has done it! She has become a raging bitch! *chuckles*
*Yuna had suceeded in pulling off Aeris's bikini top*
Aeris pushes Yuna off of her and covers her chest. She had not lost, but she was pissed.
Aeris growls and punches Yuna in the stomach, then tackling her and lying on her stomach*
*guys drool and shove the pillows on their crotches. the ones in the front get to see Aeris cleavage, which is covered in mud, while behind her they get to see some Aeris ass, which is also covered in mud. Ahh, the life.*
*Aerith pulls on the front of Yuna's bra, dripping mud all over her chest and neck.*
*Biggs and Joe are still busy with their mindless games...When suddenly..*
*Haha! Bitch! I got your bra!* *Oh my Yevon! Joe! You beat me!*
*The guys start to clap, happy that they get to see both chicks luscious boobies.
*Aerith then shoves Yuna off of her, and falls boob first into the mud, so maybe no one will see them.*
Kimahri: Kimahri want to see Yuna titties
Barret: AERIS! Show me 'dem boobies!!! &%$#!!! @!$%&*!!!!
Biggs: *Gets up* *Pats Joe the Moogle on the head* Good job. *Suddenly looks out of the booth and sees two chicks covered in so much mud its hard to tell who they are* .......Wedge...? What did I miss???
Wedge: Oh, nothing....Nothing at all...
Biggs: *shruggs* *continues watching the cat fight*
*Both chicks stop* Yuna: Oh! whats gotten into me? Im sorry, im so sorry! *pannicks* Aeris: *pissed* I kow you arent sorry, but lets call it a truce, i dont feel like getting covered in white goo as well as this mud. *giggles*
*guys start booing* MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE!!!!!
Biggs: Uh....Lets go to a commercial break, shall we?
Wedge: *wipes drool* oh, right...okay its a TIE!! *monster truck commercial echo*
Biggs: ---Holds up blank piece of papper, writing: *commercial time!!* *puts it infront of camera*
Wedge: Were gona try elimination matches next time. Anywho..*silent*
-------Right..bad ending...i kinda got bored with this match..next one wont suck so bad, promise. you know..straight girls dont write about chicks mud wrestling, do they? heh... i did cuz my freind begged me too...lol