Chapter Thirteen

They are spread out, all over the place, we'll need more C4 than what I have, but still I can nock at least half of them out if I throw the shoe in the right direction. I want to scream at how annoying this is, how frustrating, just when it was all working, it had to, typically, fall apart. Sark's noticed my pause first and is holding the other three out of sight, I think perhaps I could move backwards and disappear, but Cuvee's voice drifts up the moment the thought has started. "Irina..."

He leaves it hanging and I can see, out of the corner of my eye, Jack standing completely shocked and silent. I look down at him, trying to bluff out of this, "What do you want Cuvee?" I must be imagining things if I think I can see the hatred, the madness that is in his eyes, but I still know it is there and I register it, knowing it is an advantage.

His voice blares back up, thirty guns or more trained on me, Jack is still behind me, I can tell he wants to help, wants to save me, but I know he can't. "We all know what I want Irina, all I want is you. And not just so that I can give you a long torturous death, I know what is inside that head of yours," I see him tap his own head, he's obviously on the edge. I hope he makes a mistake, I hope he makes a mistake I can use and already I can see many ways in which I can manipulate this to my own use. His voice comes up again, "Irina, all I want is you, stand right there and I'll send someone up to get you. Don't dream of trying to run. I know who you have up there with you. If you co-operate, I'll let them live," that's a lie, I can tell. "Run, I'll kill them."

I know now, that there is dwindling hope for me, all of my plans are gone, he knows too much, he will kill them all; my most trusted friend, my daughter's one true love and her, not to mention my own husband. I grimace as I see images of him gunning them down with machine guns and I know that my aim is now to save them, let them live. I bite my lip, I feel Jack at my side and wish I could feel him there, wish he'd grab my hand, but he doesn't, e just glares down below us.

Cuvee again, "Oh and now your husband rears his ugly head, Irina, don't be stupid, you could have me." He sounds delirious, I only now realize it but he has the voice of a man on the edge, a man who has drunk too much and I know that there is another hole for my to widen.

I stare down, "Cuvee," I pause; I can anger him or flatter him, either way I have a chance at weakening him, pulling at the holes. I figure anger will work better as it is the truth, "You will never have me." I can almost smell the rage and I hesitate, I've seen what he does to people who upset him. Now Jack grabs my hand, tight, surreal but warm and nice, encouraging and a force most people can't find in any kind of drug, I speak again, "You don't deserve me."

He growls, the stamina he's trying to execute false but still echoing up to us, "Irina..."

I shake my head, hair flying wildly, I let my eyes flicker to Sark and my plan furthers, all I need is to be sure, "Cuvee..." My voice is sweet and I think the change rips through him instead of arousing suspicion. "Let me say goodbye, then I shall put up no fight."

"No, we don't have time." I grin in triumph, so does Sark, I think; Vaughn and Sydney are standing further back, watching us. He has no time, I need to win this and I continue, needing but only a few seconds, "Just a moment. Just to make sure they remember me."

He's now weary, I'm making it too obvious, and yet he agrees, "Sixty seconds, then I'm sending a chopper up." I nod and turn.

I take a step out of his sight but Sark remains where he is, just to be sure he sends no one up to check. "I want you to run as far and as fast as you can away." Their brows crease, all of them and I expect to feel tears. "Listen, no matter what, you have to move, fast, I don't want you doing anything stupid." I pause but they are still staring at me.

Cuvee's voice interrupts mine, "Thirty seconds," I believe he must think such good byes are torture. They are.

"Promise me."

Jack nods but starts quickly, I hate having to listen; "Where are you going? Are you going with him?"

I shake my head, "If he comes up here, he'll kill you all."

Jack shakes his head, "So what?"

Sark still has no idea and I'm thankful he has none. I gulp, "Just run and Sydney, Vaughn, it is love." There brows crease and they look away from each other, they don't realize what is about to happen either, but Jack, his minds is quick and I can see him fitting it in.

"Sark, I need those shoes." He hands them to me wordlessly and I return to the edge, looking down I still feel no tears, I 'm surprised. "Cuvee, I'm not coming."

Pure rage, it's what I expected from him and yet still, it shocks, "What do you mean?" It's yelled louder than I thought, my voice seems so meek compared, but still I push on.

"Catch," I throw one shoe, hard and fast and as straight as I can throw. It lands dead centre, better than I'd hoped but doesn't go off. Behind my back I cross my fingers, hoping beyond hope that this works, the seconds drip by and then it happens. Cuvee's men have moved towards it, some of them coming into range when beforehand it wouldn't have hit them. I grin, the explosion is big, big enough to take out at least half the men. I throw the other one as quickly as I can and it lands, away from Cuvee but when the orange energy or the fire begins I've taken out all but two agents and Cuvee. It worked.

He laughs and I grin, "Irina, killing all but three will not work, a helicopter will be up in a moment to get you." I know that though, that's where he's underestimated the opposition and overestimated his own mind. As long as he has the man power to get the chopper up here, we're all dead, me probably captured and interrogated for weeks or months. But this is where I can pull this off; this is where my plan comes in. I glance behind me, still none of them know and I wonder whether to tell them now or wait until I actually do it.

I turn, knowing if I tell them, they won't let me, they'll try to find another way out and we will all be dead anyway. One last glance because I know I'm going straight to hell. I want to remember them, forever, now that my forever is about to end. Sark is staring, confused but slightly proud of him shoes, I grin at him and still fell no tears. Sydney has, at some point, grabbed Vaughn's hand and they're both watching me, Sydney like I was one of those brilliant mothers. I know I'm not, but she, at this very moment, sees me like that and still I feel no tears. And then Jack, he's still thinking, ignoring me because he knows something big is about to happen. I wish he would look up, so I can remember his face properly, but there's no way to ask him. I nod and turn back around.

I glare down at Cuvee, cursing him for ruining me, for bringing me into the KGB, for everything between then and now and for this, for doing this to me. I hate him, I really do. I know I wan to look back, to see them one last time, but I've run out of time, this is it, I have to move now. One of Cuvee's men is half way to the chopper, running as fast as he can and Cuvee is simply watching me, waiting for me to run. He still doesn't know.

I take a breath, my last real one and move closer to the edge, edging into the water where it rushes past my feet and over, it isn't a fast waterfall, I can stand in the middle and be in no danger of being pushed over by the water. It isn't much more than a heavy trickle down the rock face but below that there is a deep pool, shrouded in weeping willows and vines and it connects to a river. I wish Cuvee would fall in and kill himself, but he doesn't. I take another step, then two more, getting closer to the middle.

I stop, the water is lapping at my knees, it isn't deep here and it still isn't dangerous. For a moment I wish it was, that I didn't have to do this. Still no tears come, still I don't look back. "Irina," it's Cuvee's voice, "I'm going to murder your family and then I'm going to keep you alive." The stupid bastard still doesn't realize, neither does Sark or Vaughn or Sydney. But suddenly I feel Jack's arm around my waist, holding me too tight to imagine, his breath hot on my ear.

I turn and look at him, I can tell in a second that he knows what I'm about to do, the look of hurt, the look of fear is fresh on his face and he shakes his head, "What are you doing?" He still has to ask so I explain all the while knowing I don't have time.

"Jack, if I don't they're going to come up here and kill us, if I let him take me, he'll still kill all of us. If I jump," the word is whispered, I can't bear the others to hear, they're still in the dark, watching with curious amazement, "He will look for me, and he won't find me. You have to run."

"No," so defiant, so unbelieving, I can't believe this is happening, in my entire plan, this was never supposed to happen. He stares at me, "No, I won't let you."

"There is no other way," I have to tell him, make sure he knows and he does, I can see it in his eyes, he knows I have to go, "I'm sorry." I pour it all into those words, I never dream that he'll understand what I mean, just what I feel, but I want him to and I try, those two little words, so simple, so sad.

But he does, this is my one last wish, "I'm sorry too." It's not anger or confusion, it's just sadness. And then he kisses me, the greatest way to go would have to be in his arms, I can hear Cuvee screaming below us, having realized the plan. I can hear Sydney crying as she makes her way through the water, her feet dragging, she doesn't have time. But it is all drowned out by his lips on mine.

His hands up and down my back, his hands in my hair, on my face, all over me, exploring me for the first time in forever and the last. And his lips so soft, so gentle, so incredibly Jack that I don't want to let go. His tongue exploring my own mouth, dueling with my own for the last time. The last time. And now the tears come. I can feel them hot and wet down my face, pouring, streaming over my cheeks onto his face, his hands.

I have no time left, I can hear the chopper lifting off, I cannot give them a chance, I have to go now. Sydney's still meters away, there is no time. I try to remember one more time exactly how this feels, what true bliss is and then I push away, quickly and sure of myself, hating having to do this, but determined. I feel him trying to hold on and struggle harder, I break free and I find it surprisingly cold. I swallow and look back again, I promised I wouldn't, but I do.

Out of the corner of my eye I see the chopper, just above ground but ready to swoop on us and I jump.

Bugger me, best thing I ever wrote, the way to finish a story I'd say. Yes this is it, that's the end, please review, I really want to know what you think, it's important to me. Hope you enjoyed it. Please read this and review, I'm desperate.