LOSS AND THE NEED FOR REFILLS
FRODO: NOOOO Randalf!!!
BOROMIR: Calm down Frodo. We all lose pets sometime or other.
LEGOLAS: I even lost a girlfriend.
BOROMIR: This is a maturing experience, just be grateful you got it.
FRODO: whimpering
ARAGORN: Speaking of which, does anyone know what Gandalf's last words were?
SAM: Sounded like "Fry your tools"
MERRY: "Tie your spools."
GIMLI "Buy more jewels."
GLARWENOLAS: "Fly you fools."
GIMLI: Oh! To add insult to injury! Not only do I have to fly, I have to be a flying fool!
GLARWENOLAS: Indeed. Shouldn't be too hard. Jump off the edge here and start practicing.
Gimli glared at the hybrid, until the Orcs started using the Fellowship for target practice.
ARAGORN: The dark has not improved their aim, but I would still feel safer out of range. They might miss, ya know?
The Fellowship followed Aragorn and Glarwenolas out of the mines. No difficult task, for as it turned out Aragorn had merely to turn around and take two steps before crashing down a Dwarvish slide, Glarwenolas and the others after him. When Aragorn came to a halt he was in the pale sunshine once more.
Needless to say, the Fellowship was quite bruised and battered, so they made it a point to lounge on the spotless white rocks that area was renowned for.
ARAGORN: And to think I thought I was Gandalf's best friend. He never told me he was married.
GLAREWNOLAS: Farewell, Gandalf. I do not say rest in peace, for there is no peace at home for miscreant husbands.
FRODO: Do you suppose we should sing a lament?
BOROMIR: For Gandalf?
FRODO: For Randy.
Frodo cleared his throat. This was impetus enough for Aragorn to get up...quick.
ARAGORN: Everybody take a swig of ketchup before we go.
FRODO: Could I borrow some of yours?
ARAGORN: Like you're gonna give it back? Uh-uh.
LEGOLAS: Gandalf had my pack.
GIMLI: Mine too.
Legolas screeched as only an Elf or a very angry man can.
LEGOLAS: Do you mean to say that my ketchup shared the same mode of transportation as that of a DWARF?????!
GIMLI: Well SORRY, Gandalf said he would carry it for me. It wasn't MY fault, you know!
Aragorn turned to Boromir and Sam while Legolas and Gimli bickered. Sam eyed him suspiciously.
BOROMIR: I'm not sharing.
SAM: Oh no you don't!
MERRY/PIPPIN: (smacking lips) That was good. We're all out too.
ARAGORN: Nevermind then. Where's the nearest K-mart, Frodo?
FRODO: Nearest Ketchup-mart would be....in Lothlorien! Yes. 23 percent of Ketchup Corp 's total profit comes from Lothlorien. Where did Glarwenolas go?
ARAGORN: French leave. Two minutes ago.
FRODO: NOOOO Randalf!!!
BOROMIR: Calm down Frodo. We all lose pets sometime or other.
LEGOLAS: I even lost a girlfriend.
BOROMIR: This is a maturing experience, just be grateful you got it.
FRODO: whimpering
ARAGORN: Speaking of which, does anyone know what Gandalf's last words were?
SAM: Sounded like "Fry your tools"
MERRY: "Tie your spools."
GIMLI "Buy more jewels."
GLARWENOLAS: "Fly you fools."
GIMLI: Oh! To add insult to injury! Not only do I have to fly, I have to be a flying fool!
GLARWENOLAS: Indeed. Shouldn't be too hard. Jump off the edge here and start practicing.
Gimli glared at the hybrid, until the Orcs started using the Fellowship for target practice.
ARAGORN: The dark has not improved their aim, but I would still feel safer out of range. They might miss, ya know?
The Fellowship followed Aragorn and Glarwenolas out of the mines. No difficult task, for as it turned out Aragorn had merely to turn around and take two steps before crashing down a Dwarvish slide, Glarwenolas and the others after him. When Aragorn came to a halt he was in the pale sunshine once more.
Needless to say, the Fellowship was quite bruised and battered, so they made it a point to lounge on the spotless white rocks that area was renowned for.
ARAGORN: And to think I thought I was Gandalf's best friend. He never told me he was married.
GLAREWNOLAS: Farewell, Gandalf. I do not say rest in peace, for there is no peace at home for miscreant husbands.
FRODO: Do you suppose we should sing a lament?
BOROMIR: For Gandalf?
FRODO: For Randy.
Frodo cleared his throat. This was impetus enough for Aragorn to get up...quick.
ARAGORN: Everybody take a swig of ketchup before we go.
FRODO: Could I borrow some of yours?
ARAGORN: Like you're gonna give it back? Uh-uh.
LEGOLAS: Gandalf had my pack.
GIMLI: Mine too.
Legolas screeched as only an Elf or a very angry man can.
LEGOLAS: Do you mean to say that my ketchup shared the same mode of transportation as that of a DWARF?????!
GIMLI: Well SORRY, Gandalf said he would carry it for me. It wasn't MY fault, you know!
Aragorn turned to Boromir and Sam while Legolas and Gimli bickered. Sam eyed him suspiciously.
BOROMIR: I'm not sharing.
SAM: Oh no you don't!
MERRY/PIPPIN: (smacking lips) That was good. We're all out too.
ARAGORN: Nevermind then. Where's the nearest K-mart, Frodo?
FRODO: Nearest Ketchup-mart would be....in Lothlorien! Yes. 23 percent of Ketchup Corp 's total profit comes from Lothlorien. Where did Glarwenolas go?
ARAGORN: French leave. Two minutes ago.