Would you…?

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an Inuyasha fanfiction

by

mkh2

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Disclaimer: What? Do I look like Rumiko Takahashi? I'm not even from the same island… or slice of the earth. Why do you think my Japanese is so bad?

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"Would you please bear my child?"

Slap!

Without fail, I was turned down. Again.

And again and again and again.

It didn't matter to me. I couldn't see why it should.

As a child I wasn't very lecherous, preferring to retreat into my thoughts rather than pay attention to the dancing troupe of girls Mushin would hire for entertainment. One of my last memories of my father was on one such day. The thoughts of him sinking into the earth as he got pulled into that God-forsaken Kazaana hurt; it wasn't until much later that I realized why Mushin had gone through the trouble to get those girls that day: it was to distract me from the horrors that were to shortly occur outside. I hadn't listened to Mushin but instead reacted on instinct, barreling out the door and being caught by Mushin just in time to avoid my being caught in the hell-borne winds that issued from the cursed hand of my father. My own Kazaana was so underdeveloped at the time that covering it wasn't much of an issue though, thinking back, it might've given me a few more years if I had started covering it at an earlier age.

"Beautiful maiden, would you bear my child?"

Laughter.

"Oh, houshi-sama, you are too much!"

And yet another rejection to my proposal met my ears. In a way this sort of rejection was more painful than being slapped. I may be rather… lecherous …but I still have feelings.

I must confess, I have always wanted children. Not for the sake of passing on the cursed legacy but for the sake of being a father. Passing through the villages on my journeys, partially to hunt down Naraku, partially to find someone who would be willing to deal with the heavy burden of birthing a cursed child, I couldn't help but feel jealous of the warm emotions I would see in a father's eyes as he picked up his young son, swinging him into the air, or as he would kindly accept a frail but pretty weed that looked so like a rose in the mind of his precious daughter. I wanted the joy, the laughter that children would bring. I wanted the warm home with the futon for two, me and my dearly beloved wife, whoever she would be, and all the children that went with it. I wanted to labor all day in the sun and come home at night to a good meal and tuck my children into their futons and kiss my wife and sleep.

"Oh lovely girl, would you do me the honor of-uh…"

Shriek!

"Get your hands off 'er!"

Oops, looks like I let my hands wander again – I had only just noticed something soft in my palm a moment before the shriek pierced my thoughts and I was promptly throttled by the offended woman's brother.

Sometimes I was worried that, should I find a willing recipient of my affections, and we had children, that perhaps I wouldn't get to be around to enjoy them, any of them. It made me more reluctant to stay around when I actually heard a yes. I might fool around some but I never followed through. I wanted the home life. I desired the home life. I would dream of the day I would get married, have an actual ceremony with a happy feast, of staying at home with the family I would have, of watching my children grow and have children of their own. I wanted to grow old with my wife.

But, as always, such wishes were denied me.

"Sweet maid, if you do care for me, would you bear my child?"

"You kidding me, right?"

I would mess around with geishas – they do not have children, they are supposed to remain as maids always, providing entertainment. That's what they do, provide entertainment – they are not always the sinful sort of girls that my dear friends seem to frown at the prospect of my meeting. We dance, we sing, we carry on, drinking lots of sake and eating lots of food before falling down in a blissfully drunken sleep. Again I can't help but think that if a maid would just say yes at once to my proposal I would probably run as if the very devil were at my heels. Could I really see her as an appropriate mother for my child? I think not.

"Ah, dear girl, I can tell from what I have read on your palm that you are to be blessed with many children! Would you, perhaps, consider bearing one for me?"

"Ha ha ha ha ha! Oh houshi-sama!"

The sort of woman I want as the mother of my children would have to be strong, would have to be kind, respectable, honorable. She'd have to be wise, be able to take care of herself and them. She'd have to be able to instruct them, not just in scholarly things but in the ways of the world, how it works and how it should work. She would need to be dependable – reliable – she would have to loving and caring and be able to put up with me. Oh, and she'd have to let me cook sometimes – I discovered some time back that I like to cook (and play with Kagome-sama's matches, but that's another story.)

…And she'd also have to be rather easy on the eyes.

So…

"Honorable maiden, would you bear my child?"

~Owari~

Eh… Just a little piece from Miroku's camp. Whaddya think?

AN: I wrote this late at night when I couldn't sleep not long after I had gotten my wisdom teeth (all five of 'em) removed. I had no idea that I wrote this until I found it on a black floppy disk the other day (why I had out one of my black floppies, I dunno, I usually use them for backing up stuff.) I'm not entirely certain if the medicine was affecting me. My writing doesn't seem totally coherent in this fic but I like it and, after cleaning up a couple of spelling errors, I'll post it for you to see in all it's original glory (besides, now I know why I kept having the feeling that one of my sample fics seemed so familiar to me.)