Author: EyerishEyes
Feedback: tamprollanet.org
Disclaimer: I don't own them, yada, yada, yada.
Rating: PG-13 (for sexual suggestions)
Category: humor
Summary: Unbound challenge response
DEPENDS ON HOW YOU USE IT
"I'm with Sara on this," Jacqui said, "chocolate is better than sex."
"Oh, I don't know," Catherine replied, "I think it depends on the chocolate."
The three Ladies of the Lab, as they had been dubbed by Greg, were seated at the table in the conference room, commiserating over a pot of melted chocolate and an assortment of fruit and sponge cake.
"Oh really," Sara said, her patented gap-toothed smile brightening her face, "care to elaborate on that one?"
"Well, you know, some people like milk chocolate, so to them, sex would be better than say, dark chocolate. Or vice versa."
"And exactly what type are you?" Jacqui questioned, a glint of mischief in her eyes.
"Me?" Catherine answered, her voice questioning. "Me, I'm strictly a dark chocolate kinda girl. But if I had my choice, I'd take sex every time."
Her response elicited giggles from Jacqui and Sara.
How often had she been able to do this, just sit and talk with friends, Sara thought. Not very was the answer. Not that she had ever been one to need these girl sessions, but it was nice just the same.
Catherine noticed the small smile on Sara's face. "What are you grinning about?" she asked.
"Dark chocolate, huh? Any particular brand?"
"Don't even go there, kiddo. Which would you pick?"
"I would have to say chocolate."
Catherine and Jacqui looked at each other, grinned and simultaneously stated, "Liar."
"No, really, think about it. You can have chocolate whenever you want. You can have it in public without getting arrested. Chocolate won't take you out for dinner and expect sex in return. If you have to pay for it, it costs less than a dollar. You can have more than one type and no one thinks of you as promiscuous. And thanks to Phenyl ethylamine, you don't even have to have sex to get the same high."
"Yeah, but it's still not the same. Chocolate can lead to acne. And it can make you fat."
"Those are just myths. It has never been clinically proven that chocolate causes acne or that it induces weight gain. Research has even shown that it is good for the heart."
"Yeah, well, so is sex," Catherine retorted.
"Okay, but chocolate leaves really great fingerprints." Jacqui answered back.
Catherine almost gagged on the strawberry she had just placed in her mouth. "Only you would think of fingerprints in relation to chocolate and sex."
"What, am I lying?" Jacqui asked Sara.
"No. You're just being practical. Anyway, as I was saying, chocolate has never been proven to make you fat. That's the added bonus of chocolate, it can't make you pregnant."
"Depends on how you use it," Catherine remarked.
"Depends on how you use what?" Grissom asked as he walked into the conference room.
Sara wanted to hide under the table. Her cheeks got rosy and she was sure the temperature of the room increased by about ten degrees. The one person she did not want to be discussing chocolate and sex with had just walked in the room. Okay, if she was trueful with herself, he was the only person she wanted to be discussing chocolate and sex with.
"Depends on how you use what?" he asked again.
"Sara was just saying that you can't get pregnant with chocolate and I said that it depends on how you use it," Catherine, never one to be modest, elaborated.
"Oh" was all he could say.
"Is that all you can say, Grissom? Which do you prefer, sex or chocolate?" "As I am one of the few men who believe in the notion that there is a difference between having sex and making love, I would have to go with chocolate."
"There's a difference?"
"Yes, having sex is pure animal instinct and making love is two people sharing an emotional bond. No one has ever written sonnets to sex. Love yes, sex no. There's no such thing as sex songs, only love songs. Given that, I much prefer making love. And in the absence of that, chocolate. Now if you ladies are done here, we have work to do."
Catherine just sat there, looking like the proverbial fish with her mouth wide open. Jacqui looked everywhere but at Grissom and Sara just sat there with a smile on her face. Leave it to him to leave Catherine speechless.
"Well, I got a new set of prints that need to be looked at," Jacqui hurried out of the room.
Catherine turned to leave as well, "I still say it depends on how you use it."
GnS
Later, after shift, as Grissom was making breakfast, the doorbell to his townhouse rang.
There stood Sara, grinning from ear to ear, holding a bottle of Hershey's syrup. "So how do you want to use it?"
Grissom just smiled. How did he keep getting himself into these situations?
Fin.
DEPENDS ON HOW YOU USE IT
"I'm with Sara on this," Jacqui said, "chocolate is better than sex."
"Oh, I don't know," Catherine replied, "I think it depends on the chocolate."
The three Ladies of the Lab, as they had been dubbed by Greg, were seated at the table in the conference room, commiserating over a pot of melted chocolate and an assortment of fruit and sponge cake.
"Oh really," Sara said, her patented gap-toothed smile brightening her face, "care to elaborate on that one?"
"Well, you know, some people like milk chocolate, so to them, sex would be better than say, dark chocolate. Or vice versa."
"And exactly what type are you?" Jacqui questioned, a glint of mischief in her eyes.
"Me?" Catherine answered, her voice questioning. "Me, I'm strictly a dark chocolate kinda girl. But if I had my choice, I'd take sex every time."
Her response elicited giggles from Jacqui and Sara.
How often had she been able to do this, just sit and talk with friends, Sara thought. Not very was the answer. Not that she had ever been one to need these girl sessions, but it was nice just the same.
Catherine noticed the small smile on Sara's face. "What are you grinning about?" she asked.
"Dark chocolate, huh? Any particular brand?"
"Don't even go there, kiddo. Which would you pick?"
"I would have to say chocolate."
Catherine and Jacqui looked at each other, grinned and simultaneously stated, "Liar."
"No, really, think about it. You can have chocolate whenever you want. You can have it in public without getting arrested. Chocolate won't take you out for dinner and expect sex in return. If you have to pay for it, it costs less than a dollar. You can have more than one type and no one thinks of you as promiscuous. And thanks to Phenyl ethylamine, you don't even have to have sex to get the same high."
"Yeah, but it's still not the same. Chocolate can lead to acne. And it can make you fat."
"Those are just myths. It has never been clinically proven that chocolate causes acne or that it induces weight gain. Research has even shown that it is good for the heart."
"Yeah, well, so is sex," Catherine retorted.
"Okay, but chocolate leaves really great fingerprints." Jacqui answered back.
Catherine almost gagged on the strawberry she had just placed in her mouth. "Only you would think of fingerprints in relation to chocolate and sex."
"What, am I lying?" Jacqui asked Sara.
"No. You're just being practical. Anyway, as I was saying, chocolate has never been proven to make you fat. That's the added bonus of chocolate, it can't make you pregnant."
"Depends on how you use it," Catherine remarked.
"Depends on how you use what?" Grissom asked as he walked into the conference room.
Sara wanted to hide under the table. Her cheeks got rosy and she was sure the temperature of the room increased by about ten degrees. The one person she did not want to be discussing chocolate and sex with had just walked in the room. Okay, if she was trueful with herself, he was the only person she wanted to be discussing chocolate and sex with.
"Depends on how you use what?" he asked again.
"Sara was just saying that you can't get pregnant with chocolate and I said that it depends on how you use it," Catherine, never one to be modest, elaborated.
"Oh" was all he could say.
"Is that all you can say, Grissom? Which do you prefer, sex or chocolate?" "As I am one of the few men who believe in the notion that there is a difference between having sex and making love, I would have to go with chocolate."
"There's a difference?"
"Yes, having sex is pure animal instinct and making love is two people sharing an emotional bond. No one has ever written sonnets to sex. Love yes, sex no. There's no such thing as sex songs, only love songs. Given that, I much prefer making love. And in the absence of that, chocolate. Now if you ladies are done here, we have work to do."
Catherine just sat there, looking like the proverbial fish with her mouth wide open. Jacqui looked everywhere but at Grissom and Sara just sat there with a smile on her face. Leave it to him to leave Catherine speechless.
"Well, I got a new set of prints that need to be looked at," Jacqui hurried out of the room.
Catherine turned to leave as well, "I still say it depends on how you use it."
GnS
Later, after shift, as Grissom was making breakfast, the doorbell to his townhouse rang.
There stood Sara, grinning from ear to ear, holding a bottle of Hershey's syrup. "So how do you want to use it?"
Grissom just smiled. How did he keep getting himself into these situations?
Fin.