Okay Minna! Well you people wanted to know Eiri's reaction Shuichi's outburst! Why I ask??? So you know how he truly feels about Shu-chan??? I guess so. Well to tell the truth, Eiri and his emotional turmoil really did not fit into the story. It is a Shuichi and his pain(feelings) kinda story. But well I love my reviewers, so here is Eiri's take on the whole thing! (Boy you guys are lucky I love you....)

I don't own Gravitation. I wish I did...

Oh and happy people, this is told in Eiri's point of view, just to tell you.

Eiri's Reflection

Shuichi... I sighed out loud.

Once again the brown haired twirp filled my thoughts. It has been 3 days since I last saw Shuichi. Three days since he called me names, one month since he told me I was his whole universe.

I should have saw it coming. I should have saw the unvendible. I should have realized he would leave me. I should have, I could go on forever. But the fact is Shuichi is gone.

For the past days I've been thinking of the different ways I could have stopped Shuichi from going. Each time I come to the same conclusion. I should have just told him my true thoughts. My inner feelings.

But each time I replay the scenario in my mind, I know I could never really have told Shuichi how I felt/feel about him. I'm just not that kind of guy.

I'm only a writer who writes about love. I don't understand it. Fans always ask me how I know so much about love. Every time I answer, 'It's just a gift.'

But the truth is I have no clue how I write about 'love'. I guess its just how I want to feel about it. How I want to act when the man of my dreams tells me that he loves me. (Yes I know I said man. I've finally embraced my gayer side. Or more my Shuichi side at least.)

Have you ever read one of my earlier books? The lead character either dies or suffers from unrequited love. So the truth is back in my earlier years I knew nothing about love. People just thought I did. People just thought they knew the writer Yuki Eiri. Well the joke was on them. They didn't know that all my characters suffered pain and sorrow because that was what I was feeling my self. They didn't know I killed my teacher. The real Yuki.

So in away I have to thank my departed teacher. Because without him I would never have became wealthy, I would have never meet Shuichi.

But most of you are probably thinking, "Eiri we don't care what drove you to write. We want to know how you feel about Shuichi leaving you. What you thought when he left."

My answer is this; when he left, I felt nothing. I couldn't even feel my toes. My heart got ripped up into a million shards of glass. I couldn't move my lips.

My head began to spin, I couldn't see quite clearly. I felt rage surging through my veins. I thought Shuichi was the one to blame for leaving. I had no part in his retreat.

Soon the blood in my body cooled down. I began to think coherently. I knew it was my fault that my angel left. I knew I was the only one to blame.

Do you want the whole truth? I cried. Tears streamed down my face. I couldn't register all the guilt I was feeling at once. So I drank and drank. I've only been sober for a little while now. But not too sober. Because then I wouldn't be writing this dribble, to fans who don't even know my plight.

After drinking I smoked, I'm still taking a puff here and there. Soon I'll delete this crap. It will never be seen again. 'After that?' You ask. I'll drink some more. Smoke some more.

'What about Shuichi?' you comment.

I'll deal with him later. Maybe drop by his place, tell him how I feel. Or maybe sit alone for the rest of my life, watching the world progress around me. Either way Shuichi will always be in my heart, in my very soul. Even if he doesn't know it.

*Delete*



Well what did you think? I tried to tell you how Eiri really felt about Shuichi. How even himself couldn't comprehend all the feelings that flew through his head. I know that's not really what you wanted, but still I tried! I did what felt true to me. So I hope you kinda enjoyed it!

(p.s. I'm going away on holidays this year, so my next update will not be until after the 10th of January. So until then, have a fun time reading a load of fics!!!!)

Chuse,

Inari