A/N: Well...um, this is my first fanfic using the Baudelaires, but please read. Don't fear it, read it!

The Baudelaire orphans were running through the night. They were running away from the evil Count Olaf. Klaus was holding Sunny and Violet was ahead of them. Violet stopped and doubled over her knees. Klaus caught up with her.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he balanced Sunny on the side of his hip as he patted Violet's shoulder.

"I'm tired of running, Klaus," she cried. "I'm tired of having to run away from Olaf. I want to live my dreams and not fear being killed!"

"What are your dreams?" Klaus asked. Violet looked up with stars in her eyes.

"I want to be a sleazy pole dancer!"

"BOWLAH!" Sunny shrieked, with probally meant "WHAT!"

"But-but Violet, that's…that's…I thought you wanted to be a inventor!" Klaus exclaimed. Violet shook her head.

"No, that was only to please Mother and Father. But since their dead…" Violet began as she pulled at the collar of her dress. Klaus lunged at her.

"VIOLET, you don't want this! Something's wrong! Your sick!" he cried as he tried to prevent her from loosening her dress.

"I do want this, Klaus! But I will keep the dress on, but…" she began. She pulled out the ribbon from her hair and flipped it dramatically from side to side. "FREEEDOM!"

Klaus and Sunny stared at her in shock and horror. Something was terribly wrong with their sibling. She was usually the down to earth one, but…

"Well, I found you again, Bauldebrats!" a voice cackled behind Klaus. He turned around and saw the one man they feared the most. Count Olaf.

"Weejoba!" Sunny wailed. Which meant something like, "WHAT THE BUTT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?"

"I'm here to kidnap all three of you and take your-" Olaf began. His eyes widened as a speeding object pounced on him.

"Oh, Olafy! You've come to save me!" Violet cried as she hugged him. Olaf looked at her in disgust and confusion.

"Get off me, girl," he growled as he tried to yank Violet off of him. She clung onto him.

"Olaf, we must be married at once! So then we can have my fortune and then…I can be a sleazy pole dancer!" Violet screamed like a Frat girl. Olaf grinned toothily.

"Yes-yes, I agree! We are to marry at once!" Olaf said. Violet looked adoringly at Olaf.

"Oh, Count, I knew you'd understand," Violet said lustfully. She flipped her hair again and then something odd happened. She and Olaf kissed. They kissed in a total exaggerated way that seemed like she was pranking all of them.

"Ew, I'm gonna be sick!" Klaus screamed as he dropped Sunny and ran over to vomit in the bushes.

"Winanow!" Sunny cried in disgust, which meant "Don't puke on me!"

Klaus looked up and saw Violet was wiping of spit bubbles from off her mouth. He made a hacking sound and barfed again. Violet shook of the bubbles from off her hand and turned to Olaf, who was grinning like a idiot. Violet licked her lips and had a disgusted look on her face.

"Olaf, um my mouth tastes funny," she said as she looked at Olaf.

"Well, er…my teeth are in a…condition…" began Olaf, but was interrupted by someone popping out of the bushes. It was none other than Esme Squalor. She was dressed in a pink and lime green horse jockey outfit with a pack of gum in her hand.

"Turn that dirty mouth into a clean one with Orbit gum!" she said. She handed the pack to Olaf and ran off into another bush. Olaf stared after her.

"Um…"

Olaf popped a piece of gum into his mouth and spat it out. He began to fan at his mouth and cry like a little girl. Violet tried to comfort him.

"Olaf, what's wrong?" she squealed.

"I's weeds waters!" he screamed with difficulty, like his tongue was burning. Violet looked around furiously and saw a nearby lake. She dragged Olaf over to it and threw him in. She jumped in too. Olaf calmed down and violet sighed with relief.

"Oh, Sugarloaf, I was so worried!" Violet cried as she flung her arms around Olaf.

"It's okay, I'm okay and we will be able to get your fortune!" Olaf said innocently.

"Olaf, you are so smart!"

"I know I am."

"Your so smart that I-I want to marry you right now!"

"Then let us go to the nearest church and be married…but first I want my bachelor party!" Olaf said. Violet clapped and got goo goo eyes. What occurred next, made Klaus hunch over a bush and vomit even more.

"HEY!" screamed a voice from the bushes. Esme Squalor stood up in her jockey outfit and was covered in vomit. "Vomit is not in!"

She stalked away as Klaus and Sunny watched her. Klaus raised is eyebrows in confusion and shock. Sunny's jaw had dropped.

"We have to do something," Klaus said. "Something is not right and we have to make it right before Violet does something she regrets."

"Woola!" said Sunny, which probally meant "I think it's a little too late for that…"

"I think I can help you."

A dark, mysterious figure approached Klaus and Sunny from behind. They turned around and almost screamed in horror. It turned out to be a man.

"Who-who are you?" Klaus stuttered.

"I am Lemony Snicket and I suppose you are Klaus and that's your sister, Sunny?" the man asked nodding towards them.

"How do you know that?" Klaus asked frightened.

"I have been following you and your siblings for quite some time."

"Wha!?"

"Yes, I know, fascinating isn't it?"

"Ye-I mean no!" Klaus said. "But anyways, how can you help Violet?"

"Well, something horrible has went wrong and it will destroy everything you know if we don't stop it." Lemony said. Klaus and Sunny stared at him in horror.